|posted on 16-Apr-2002 3:41:06 AM|
|“Life After Departure”|
Rating: G-NC-17 (NC-17 coming later)
Summary: Starts the day after “departure”. Everyone is trying to cope with what happened the past few months.
Part 1- Maria POV
It’s been one day. One day since I almost lost Michael. One day since I realized he wasn’t leaving. One day since I realized I would never lose anyone else...ever.
When I think of everything that’s happened in these past few months my head starts to spin. First of all there’s Alex. Possibly one of the friends I could ever have, I mean ever had. He was my protector, my shoulder to cry on, my magic eight ball, and now he’s gone. It feels like a piece of my soul has been ripped away from me. Sometimes I wonder if he would think having the Czechs in our lives was worth death. I guess I’ll never know but I know that I will never leave Michael. He’s my heart, how do you live without your heart? It’s impossible.
Tess. That word, that name makes me feel so much hatred. For Alex whose life was cut short. For Isabel who finally learned not to be afraid, to love and to be vulnerable. Only to have it snatched away from here. For Michael who lost something he searched his whole life for. For Liz who not only lost Alex but who lost Max as well. For Max who lost a son, a piece of himself. For me, for not knowing how to make it okay again, for myself, for all of us.
Isabel’s been well not so Isabel. She chopped off her hair and doesn’t wear makeup. She’ll never just let herself be in pain. She hides it and puts it somewhere deep down inside of her so she doesn’t have to deal with it. Problem is she can’t run form it, it’s always there and as long as she hides from herself she’ll never be able to live her life.
Liz is broken, completely and totally broken. Liz used to be the most important thing in Max’s life. That was what got her through those nights when they were apart because she knew he was thinking about her too. She lost that because he doesn’t think of her anymore, he thinks of his son. The son he created with another woman.
Max told me he was fine because he would get his son back. It scares me because I don’t think Max is thinking about what it will cost him. I don’t think he cares, I guess I would either.
Michael. He is the only good thing in this mess I call life. He stayed for me. He gave up his home for me. He loves me. When I think about it I can’t help but have this totally stupid grin on my face. The thing that gets me though is that he is mine. We’ve been in this weird on/off relationship for almost three years now but all in this time he’s never really been mine. He’s main focus has always been home, the same home he gave up for me. It totally scares me, what if he ends up regretting it? I feel like I should just run the other way but I won’t. He shared his life with me that night before he was suppose to leave and I’ll share my heart and all it’s fears and anxieties with him.
I haven’t seen him since I dropped him and Max off at his apartment. Max just needed to talk with him. I think he’s already planning on how he’s going to get his son back.
Michael’s working at the Crashdown tonight, I hope he comes in for his shift because I’m working the same one.
P.S. No I haven’t forgotten about Kyle but I really don’t want to go into the inner workings of his mind right now.
I pulled the back door of the Crashdown open and ran inside. It was pouring outside. I was completely drenched and shivering, so I opened my locker to find my extra Crashdown uniform. I opened my locker and looked inside and had an epiphany, I am a slob. Before I got to dwell on this, two strong arms found their way around my waist and I smiled and breathed in the scent that was uniquely Michael.
I looked at Michael and laughed, there was my man of few words.
“Hey yourself, you and Max still doing the whole male alien bonding thing? ‘Cause if you’re not busy I would really like to have an encore of Friday night’s performance.”
I could just picture Michael smirking behind me.
“Sure Blondie.” He turned me around and placed a soft kiss on my lips. “Stay with me tonight, Maria.”
“Sure Spaceboy, I wanted to talk to you anyway.”
“Yeah we should talk.”
“Wow! This is a first.” Michael flashed me his trademark scowl and replied, “What’s that suppose to mean?”
“You wanting to talk. That’s never happened before.”
“Well we have been trying new things recently, we’ll just add this to the list.” I started to giggle but the second I looked in Michael’s eyes I almost choked on my own tongue. “ I can usually think of better things to do than talk, you know what I mean?”
The next thing I knew I felt Michael’s soft wet lips attacking my neck. I felt his hot breath on my pulse point and felt a chill run down my spine. When I finally realized that we were in the back of the Crashdown Cafe very close to reaching a point of no return I quickly pushed Michael away and muttered “work”. Michael just nodded his head, took my hand and lead me into the front of the Crashdown Cafe.
|posted on 16-Apr-2002 10:14:24 AM|
|I am a huge candy fan but I will have m/l. At the being of every chapter I'm going to have each of the six characters doing a journal entry like Maria did at the being of Part 1. So there will be loads of m/l in this story. Promise! Thanks for the feedback.|
|posted on 16-Apr-2002 2:52:11 PM|
|The story will be M/M since they are my favirote couple so don't worry rollergirl. The next part will have more M/M since Michael's POV is up next.|
Part 2- Isabel’s POV
There were so many things I wanted to tell you when you were alive. Now you’re gone but I hope you can hear me.
I’m so sorry Alex, if I wasn’t an alien you would still be here and we could be together, we could be happy. Instead you’re gone and I’m alone. I feel so alone Alex. Max is too busy with his son, Liz and I were never real close anyway, Michael and Maria are too involved in each other, and Kyle, well I don’t think he’ll be okay for awhile.
When I go to sleep at night I picture how it could have been. It would have been perfect Alex. You’d be a self-made millionaire from creating some great computer thing. I’d be a self-employed fashion designer. We’d have three kids, each two years older than the other. We’d make loved to each other every night after tucking the kids in. We’d wake up in each other’s arms every morning.
Maria and Liz are okay. I know you’re probably worried about them. You were such a great friend Alex; you were such a great everything. We all miss you. There’s this empty place in our lives where you used to be.
There was something I’ve wanted to tell you since the end of sophomore year. I love you Alex. I’ll always be yours.
I placed the envelope on his tombstone and sat down on the grass. I traced his name with my fingers and realized I would never be any closer to Alex than this. With six feet of dirt between us.
“Alex, god Alex, please don’t leave me. I’m so sorry, please.”
Everything I tried to hold in came pouring out of me. I needed him but he was gone. I didn’t think I could live. Than I realized that I could get closer to Alex. I could be with him in a place that the fact that I am an alien wouldn’t hurt me, him, and us.
I scrambled to my feet and started to walk back to my car, when I bumped into someone and fell back on the grass.
“Yea. Um. How are you doing?”
“I’m fine, look I have something to do so I’m gonna head out.” I could feel his eyes boring into me. It was like he could feel what I felt, hear what I thought.
“I really don’t want to be alone so why don’t I join you?”
I looked at Kyle and I could tell he knew that I was about to do something drastic. Well I guess prolonging being with Alex for a few hours would be okay. I mean this is the first time Kyle’s actually wanted to participate in something for awhile.
“You know what, it’s really not that important. Let’s just go to the Crashdown. I’m kind of hungry.”
“Sounds good to me.”
“No weird Buddha quotes tonight?”
“Sorry I’m all out.”
I looked at Kyle and I could feel that he was in at least as much pain as me. So why hasn’t he ended it yet? I guess he’s just stronger than I am. Without Alex I have nothing left to hold on to. Kyle and I walked the rest of the way to the Crashdown in silence.
When I walked into the Crashdown the first things I noticed was Michael and Maria’s flirting/fighting. I motioned for Kyle to go to the booth in the corner, when we were sitting I pointed towards Michael and Maria and let out a little giggle. I think that was the first time I’ve done that in months but being here watching the two of them felt familiar and warm. For the first time since I thought about joining Alex in death I realized what I would be giving up, my family. Kyle looked over at me and smiled even though I noticed it didn’t reach his eyes.
“It’s good to know some things never change.” I looked at Kyle and nodded.
“How long do you think it will be before the make up session?” Kyle looked like he was pondering the question than replied, “ I give them ten minutes.”
“I give ‘em one. I’ll put ten bucks on it.”
“You’re on. Guerin’s got more self-control than that.”
Suddenly I saw Michael grab Maria and heard him scream to the other cook that they were on break. I looked at Kyle and smiled.
“So what are you psychic now?”
“Nope it was just common sense.”
“How’d ya figure?”
“He stayed on Earth for her. So Maria is probably being extra generous and that just makes Michael even hornier. They’re the equivalent to two dogs in heat.”
“I bet you ten bucks she lays him by the end of the week and I bet you I kill him for it.”
“I bet you twenty she already has.”
Kyle swung around in his seat to look towards the backroom.
“He lays one pinky on her...” I looked at Kyle and burst out laughing. Seeing his face puff up like a blowfish when he thought about Michael touching his quasi stepsister was just hilarious. Then it hit me full force, I was laughing. I was moving on without Alex. I told him I would always be his and I meant it. I couldn’t lose him but maybe he was already gone. No! I screamed at myself as I felt tears prick at my eyes and ran towards the backroom. I heard Kyle jump up to come after me so I stopped.
“I just need a minute Kyle.”
“If you need me...”
I walked towards the backroom, I opened the door and walked right past the half naked Michael and Maria. I walked right into the bathroom and locked the door and cried. I cried for betraying my love, my Alex.
“Izzy.” I could hear the concern in Maria’s voice. Maybe she could help. She loved Alex, maybe she could tell me how to make it up to him. To make him forgive me. I tried to answer but only a sob came out so I just unlocked the door and hoped she’d get the message. I heard the bathroom door open and close. The next thing I knew Maria was holding me to her stroking my hair telling me everything was going to be alright. When I finally gained some control I called out her name.
“Yea. Iz what is it?” I decided I would ask her. I’d let her show me how to make Alex stay, make him want to come back to me.
“How do I make him forgive me?”
“Alex.” Maria lifted my head and looked into my eyes. She looked as if she was trying to decided if what I said was a joke or not.
“Is that what you think? You think he’s mad at you?” I didn’t trust so I just nodded.
“Well I hate to the one to tell you that all your self loathing was done in vain, but he’s not angry with you. He didn’t die to leave you. Alex loved you. I should know I was one of his girls but you know what Isabel, you were the girl.”
I looked up at Maria and started to sob uncontrollably.
“I can’t live like this Maria, it hurts too much.”
“I know Isabel, I know but it will get better you just have to fight. Lean on us Isabel. Me, Michael, Kyle, Max, and Liz. We’re all here for you. That’s what Alex wanted, he wanted us all to be together and happy.” For the first time in awhile I felt relieved, I wasn’t as alone as I thought.
|posted on 17-Apr-2002 1:02:28 AM|
Part 3- Michael’s POV
Maria told me that writing all the stuff that goes on in my head makes it easier to deal with. So here I am writing in this stupid notebook like an idiot. I watch her writing page after page of stuff in her journal, I really don’t think I have that much to say. I hate Tess, I’m worried about everyone, and yet I’m completely happy because I know that me and Maria are connected, she’s mine and always will be. All I know is that eventually all this stuff is going to come crashing down on us but I’ll make sure to push Maria out of the way.
I could hear Isabel crying from the bathroom. I wish I could help her but I know I can’t. If I lost Maria... I don’t even want to think about it. She needs Max; they've always had this special connection. I heard another sob come from the bathroom and decided to call Max.
“Yea, look I think you should come to the Crashdown, Isabel needs you.”
“Is she okay?”
“I’m not sure just get over here.” With that said I hung up the phone and sat on the couch and waited for Max. I heard the door open and looked over expecting to see Max but found a very worried Kyle instead.
“Is she okay?” Kyle kept stealing glances of the bathroom.
“I don’t know. I called Max; hopefully he’ll be able to help.” Kyle just nodded but when we both heard the bathroom door open we quickly ran towards it. Maria stepped out and I could tell she was on the verge of breaking down by the way she held herself. I pulled Maria to the corner of the room and pulled her into my arms.
“I’m going to talk to Mr. Parker; I think we should leave early and head back to my place.” She just looked at me and nodded, she looked so lost. A placed a quick kiss on her forehead and went in search of Mr. Parker.
When I returned to the backroom Isabel, Max, and Kyle had left and Maria was lying down on the couch. I walked over to Maria and placed a light kiss on her nose. Her eyes fluttered open and she looked at me and smiled. I took her hand and helped her up.
“Come on let’s go home.” After I said that Maria just gave me this strange look, then I realized what I had said. “What I mean um...” Maria laughed then looked in my eyes and said “Let’s go home.” I pulled her into my arms and placed a chaste kiss on her lips. There would be plenty of time for sex later; I just wanted to make sure she was all right.
I opened the door to the apartment and led her to the couch. Then I went to the bathroom to start a hot bath. Something happened when she was comforting Isabel and I knew that taking hot baths is one of her favorite ways to relax. Plus I get to sit in a big tub of water with my naked girlfriend, so it really was a win-win situation.
When the water was ready I walked back to the living room and carried Maria to the bathroom; I dissolved our clothes (with my rapidly improving powers) and settled into the bath with Maria’s weight on my chest. She sighed then turned around a little so she could bury her face in the crook of my neck. I felt wet, hot tears on my shoulder and held her closer.
“I’m so scared Michael.”
“You don’t have to be scared Blondie. I’d never let anything happen to you, I promise.”
“I’ll never be good enough.” I couldn’t believe I heard these words come out of her mouth. She’s perfect; you can’t get better than that.
“Maria what are you talking about?”
“Alex always knew how to fix everything but I can’t and everyone I love is falling apart.”
“It’s not your job to fix their lives. You just have to be there for them. You can’t magically make all their problems disappear.” She looked at me with her big green eyes and I felt my heart clench. I saw so much pain in those eyes. All I wanted to do was sink into her and make her forget all the pain. “I’ll always be here Maria, no matter what you’re stuck with me.”
She smiled and stepped out of the bath and put a towel around her beautiful body. Then she looked at me and instead of pain in her eyes I saw lust. She smiled at me and said “Come to bed Michael.” I just watched her for a moment until I realized what she had just said. I jumped out of the booth and ran towards my bedroom. When I got there Maria was spread out on my bed totally exposed to my view. I felt my cock harden as I looked at her perfectly shaped breasts. I could already see her juices starting to roll down her thighs. God I couldn’t wait to taste her again.
I crawled up to her full pouty lips and kissed her hard. I licked and gently nibbled her lower lip, begging her to open her mouth to me. She complied and I plunged my tongue into her mouth and explored every part of it. I felt her grab my ass to pull me closer to where she needed me and I groaned into her mouth. I could tell she just wanted me to fuck her had and fast but I wanted to make this last. I wanted to show her how much I loved her my making her feel amazing.
“Not so fast Blondie. I love you; I want to make love to you. I’ll fuck you later.” Maria looked at me and laughed. I looked in her eyes than began to suck and nibble at her pulse point on her neck.
“Oh god Michael.”
I felt her arch into me, her body begging for more. So I took one rose colored nipple into my mouth and massaged the other with my hand.
“Sh baby, I’ll take care of you.” I started placing feather light kisses down her stomach when I reached her curls I looked up to look into her eyes.
“Michael.” She whispered breathlessly.
So I brought my lips to her clit and started to suck, creating a vacuum. I felt her buck her hips up trying to get me to take more of her into my mouth. I impaled her with my tongue and I felt her shudder.
“Michael please, I need to feel you inside me. Please Michael I need you!” I wanted it to last longer but I knew she needed me now so I positioned myself at her entrance and brought my lips down on hers.
I entered her with one smooth stroke and I started to move within her slowly, softly. She’d only been entered once before so it was still a little painful so I was careful. When she started to meet my thrusts I knew she wanted more so I picked up my pace. I started to press into that one spot on the walls of her pussy that made her thighs quake.
“Michael! Oh god, I love you so much.”
“I love you too baby.”
I saw Maria smile when I called her baby. Another first for us. I reached between us and started to stroke her clit, I felt her walls tighten around and we climaxed together. I felt her body go limp and pulled her to me so her back was against my chest. I slightly bit down on her shoulder and smiled when I saw the slight purple bruise emerge.
“Are you marking me Spaceboy?”
“Damn straight. You’re mine Maria.”
“Always yours Michael.” I heard her yawn and kissed her shoulder and lulled her to sleep. When I was sure she was asleep, I decided to join her in slumber.
When I woke up I could tell Maria was already awake by her breathing. Her body was stiff, so I knew something was wrong.
“Maria what’s the matter?” She turned to look at me and smiled.
“Nothing. I was just worried about Isabel.”
“We’ll call her later today; maybe she’ll want to go out somewhere.”
“I’m hungry.” I looked at her and chuckled. That was my girl.
“What’d you want?”
“Okay so get up and cook them.” I looked right at her and smirked.
“Miiiiiiiichhhhhhhhaellllllll” She whined then put on her famous pout. How could I resist?
“Sure Blondie.” I leaned over and gave her a quick kiss. I saw a big smile cross her lips.
“What exactly are you smiling at Maria?” I asked with humor in my voice.
“You. You’re so whipped.” I grabbed a pillow and chucked it at her. Then I grabbed her wrists and pinned her down to the mattress and started to tickle her. I saw tears enter her eyes. I felt a smile cross my face, for the first time in awhile her tears weren’t tears of sadness or pain. They were of happiness.
“Michael oh god! Michael stop!” She tried to get out the sentence between her laughter.
“Michael I need to breathe.” I stopped and got up off the bed. She looked at me curiously.
“Michael where are you going?”
“I thought you wanted pancakes?”
“Oh yea. Go, don’t forget the blueberries.”
We were snuggled on the couch eating our pancakes, watching pokemon, okay I was watching and Maria was complaining and explaining to me why Scooby-doo was better.
Maria looked over at me and sighed then went to open the door.
“Liz?” I heard Maria say.
“Maria did you spend the night?” It was then that I realized Maria was only wearing my Metallica t-shirt. Personally I couldn’t stand Liz and I wished she’d remove that stick from her ass but my best friend was in love with her so I shut my mouth.
“Um... Liz why are you here, if you’re not here to see me?” Maria really was a pro of taking charge of a conversation.
“I needed to talk to Michael.” Oh shit! Great now I actually have to talk to little miss perfect.
“Talk to Michael? As in make conversation?”
“Yea about Max.” That’s it I’m climbing out the bathroom window. The last thing I want to hear about this morning is the wonder that is Max.
“Well he kinda fell asleep.” Thank-you Maria! I’ll make this up to you later Blondie.
“Do you think we could talk?”
When I realized Liz would be entering the apartment I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep. Maria led Liz into the bedroom and shut the door but I could still hear their voices through the door.
“Did Michael say anything about Max?” Liz asked in a quiet voice.
“Liz why don’t you just call him?”
“I really want to Maria but I just can’t, not without knowing what he wants.”
“Well you’re never going to find out if you avoid him!”
“Maria you don’t understand what it’s like to love someone with your heart and soul, you just don’t understand.”
“What I mean is what you and Michael have is mostly physical; it’s just different.” Is Liz Parker dissing our relationship, in our own bedroom? I hope Maria kicks her teeth in.
“You have no idea what me and Michael share.”
“What, Liz what? Do you really think I would just give myself to anyone? Do you really think that little of me?” I could hear the hurt in her voice. I wish I could lock Maria up in this apartment and protect her from everything, everyone.
“Look Maria I’m sorry, I’ll just go.”
“You didn’t answer my question.”
“I don’t know okay! Everything and everyone is changing and I just don’t know anymore.” Liz stormed out of the apartment and I quickly got up and walked over to Maria.
“I’m going to check on Isabel.” With that said she walked into the bedroom to call the Evans’ household.
I sat down on the couch and looked at the closed bedroom door. I’ve never seen Liz actually hurt Maria before and I honestly don’t think she meant to. The past few months have been driving everyone crazy.
I promised myself I would protect Maria. If that means stomping on a certain Liz Parker I’d do it in a heartbeat. I can hear her crying in the other room. She already lost Alex and has been loosing Liz more with each passing day. I open the door to the bedroom and walk in. I lay next to her and wrap her in my arms, letting her know that I’m not going anywhere.
|posted on 19-Apr-2002 11:45:20 AM|
| Kyle’s POV|
I have the same dream every night. I walk into my room and I see Tess hurting Alex. She looks at me and motions for me to come to her. So I walk over to her and take her hand and then I kill him.
I kill Alex. I kill him every night in my dreams and it hurts more than anything to know that I played a part of it in reality. He was my friend we had a special bond. The bond that all eight of us use to share, we were bonded by our secret.
I know I should hate Tess but I don’t. I love her. How could I love her? What kind of person does that make me? I feel like if I love her it makes what I did to Alex that much worse.
I wonder if he hates me. Is he up there somewhere thinking of ways to get revenge? I wouldn’t blame him if he did. I deserve it. I wonder why Isabel doesn’t hate me, why all of them don’t hate me. I helped destroy Alex; I don’t care if I was under some stupid alien mind warp. I should have done something.
When Alex died a part of everyone died too. Max and Liz’s relationship started to crumble yet again. I think they will eventually make it through but will it be worth it? Maria’s music died. Music was her dream but when Alex died she stopped because it hurt too much. She lost her dreams. Isabel...well, she lost herself.
I heard the phone ring and got up off the couch to answer it.
“Hey man. It’s Michael, Maria’s on this mission to get everyone together today so you in?”
“Do I have a choice?”
“Well you could say no but then you’d have a very pissed off De Luca to deal with.”
“Okay, I’ll be there around one.”
I hung up the receiver and sat back on the couch. This would be the first time the six of us got together since the aliens almost went home.
I trudged up the stairs to Michael’s apartment. I really didn’t want to be here right now but what Maria De Luca wanted Maria De Luca gets.
I knocked on the door and about a second later Maria opened the door and flung herself into my arms.
“I’m so glad you came Kyle.” I looked at Maria and smiled but honestly I really wished she’d get off my case. She stepped aside to let me through and I noticed everyone was there. I could feel the tension in the air. There were so many things left unsaid. The second thing I noticed was that Max and Liz were sitting side by side looking into each other’s eyes. I was ready to blow chunks. I went and sat by Isabel who looked a little too pale if you ask me. The second I sat down Max stood up obviously ready to play the role of leader again.
“I’m glad Maria got everyone here because they’re a lot of things we need to discuss.” I rolled my eyes and heard Isabel stifle a laugh behind me.
“First of all I’m going to do whatever it takes to get my son back. If that means leaving Roswell or even the planet then that’s what I’m going to do. I need to know where you all stand on this.”
“I’m not leaving Maria.” Maria looked at Max then Michael.
“I’ll go, wherever we need to go to get your son back.” Max smiled at Maria then looked towards me and Isabel.
“Whatever.” Isabel said. I just looked at Max and replied “What she said.”
I saw Max look at Liz with fearful eyes. Liz looked up at him and smiled.
“I love you Max. Whatever happens we’ll make this work.” Max took Liz’s hand and gave it a quick squeeze.
“Secondly we don’t know what would happen if Michael or I got a girl pregnant. We know an alien/alien wouldn’t survive but we don’t know about a human/alien baby. So I think that we should stick to the plan of the not giving into your um urges. Liz, Michael, Maria can you agree to that?”
I could see the hurt in Liz’s eyes. Tess would have been with Max in a way she would never be able to be. Michael’s eyes flashed with anger as did Maria’s. Michael looked Max right in the eye and spoke.
“Look Maxwell me and Maria’s sex life is none of your business.”
“Leave it alone Max.”
“The two of you had sex already didn’t you?” Maria stood up and put a hand on Michael’s should then looked directly at Max.
“Yes we did. Now just drop it Max.”
“I’m not going to just drop it Maria. What if Michael gets you pregnant what then?” Michael pushed Maria behind him and through clenched teeth addressed Max.
“You mean like what happened with you and Tess? The difference is Max that I love Maria. If she gets pregnant I’ll take care of her instead of shipping her off to another planet on the Granolith express.” I could see the hurt in Max’s eyes the second Michael said that.
“That was a low blow, Michael.” After Max said that he walked out of the apartment with Liz close behind him. Maria let out a sigh then said “Well that went well.”
Isabel got up off her chair and walked towards the door. “I’ll see you guys later.” I quickly got up and walked after her. “Hey Isabel wait up.” She stopped in her tracks and looked at me.
“I have baseball tickets and I was wondering if you wanted to go?”
“On a date.”
“No it’s just baseball.”
“I don’t do sports.” I grabbed her arm before she could walk away. For some reason I wanted to take her out and help her with some of her pain. Maybe she could help me with mine too.
“Please. I’m not that close with Max and Liz and if I invite Michael and Maria they’ll just be groping each other the whole time. It’ll be fun, I promise.”
“Okay Valenti but you owe me.” I nodded and led her towards my car.
|posted on 20-Apr-2002 10:06:45 PM|
We were falling apart. My best friends, no my family was completely unraveling.
Liz had come early and apologized, which of course I accepted. I knew she didn’t mean what she said. We’re all so on edge with what’s happened in the past few months.
I saw her talking Max. I think she told me she wanted to try again. I hope they do, they deserve some happiness. They’re miserable without each other and they know it.
I know that this isn’t over. These past few months have been hard and I only think it will get worse. I’m scared for all of us. We’re all fragile right now. We haven’t had time to heal but when have we ever?
Sometimes I wish Michael wasn’t an alien but then he wouldn’t be Michael.
I walked over to Michael and wrapped my arms around him. “Well since all of our friends bailed on us what do you want to do?” I felt him put a hand on my thigh and start to massage it.
“I can think of a couple of things Blondie.”
“Michael we need to talk.”
“Yea, I kinda figured.”
“Why did you stay Michael? I don’t want to the one to hold you back. Michael your home had always meant everything to you.”
“I know Maria and it still does. The thing is I realized that my home isn’t on some other planet. It’s wherever you are Maria. You make me happy Blondie.”
I could feel the tears pricking at my eyes. I bit my lip trying to hold back the tears.
“Maria what’s wrong. What did I say?” I placed my hand on either side of his face and looked into his eyes.
“I’m scared Michael.”
“Of what?” I couldn’t believe he really didn’t know.
“Of us. I mean since Tucson we’ve been opening up to each other and I’ve been falling even more in love with. Then that night when you gave me the flashes and we made love, me connected in away I never thought possible but I knew that it wouldn’t last. Now you’re offering me forever and it’s just...” Michael looked up at me confused and interrupted.
“Okay I’m not seeing the problem.”
“I was always able to hold back a piece of myself but I can’t anymore. I’m completely vulnerable to you Michael. I can’t protect myself from you. If I lose you or if you pushed me away I wouldn’t be able to take it.” I finally let the tears fall free. I never let anyone in like this. Not my mom not Liz or Alex and I was scared. I felt him press his lips my closed eyelids and I wrapped my arms around him.
“Maria look at me.” I looked up into his eyes and he held my shaking hands in his. “I will never leave you or hurt you. I swear to you no matter what happens you will always have me. No other planets, destined mates, or out of control alien powers will ever come between us. I understand how you feel Maria because I feel the same way, but I trust you Maria. Do you trust me?”
“With my life, no with my heart.” He looked up at me and smiled then pulled me back into his arms. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“I’m bored.” I looked over at my alien boyfriend watching his retarded hockey game.
“Maria shut up I’m trying to watch the game.” *Let’s see what I could do to get his attention.*
“Michael.” I said in my best come hither voice. He didn’t even look up. I will not be ignored for a game. I crawled up between his legs and started to unbutton his jeans. “Maria could you move your head I can’t see.” *Oh my god!* I ducked my head down and continued what I was doing. I started to pull down his pants and boxers.
“Maria what the hell are you doing? I’m trying to...” I placed my lips on his cock and sucked lightly. *Well that certainly shut him up.* I could taste the salty pre cum and sucked a little harder.
“Maria.” I could barely hear the quiet whisper of my name on his lips.
I ran my tongue on the underside of his shaft and felt him shudder in pleasure. Then I pulled him farther into my mouth and grazed my teeth over the hardened flesh.
“Holy shit! Where’d you learn to do that?”
I completely brought him into my mouth and moved my hands towards his balls and started to massage them. I felt him thrust hard into my mouth and I could tell he was about to cum. So I got up and walked towards the bathroom.
“Maria? Maria! You can’t do that! You can’t just stop!” I could hear him struggling to keep his voice in check and I knew he needed to release badly. I walked right up to him and smiled.
“That’ll teach you to ignore me for a stupid hockey game.”
I woke up with a pair of strong arms wrapped around me. After the little blow job incident Michael had practically dragged me to bed. Not that I was complaining.
I felt his eyes looking at my body and I smiled. I loved the way he looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing in the world.
“Haven’t we talked enough?”
“And you love every minute of it.” I looked up at him and laughed. Then I nuzzled my face in his neck.
“We really should go out.”
God he could be so annoying! “Well I’m going. We need to make an appearance before my mother starts to worry about what we’re doing.”
“First of all you’re not going anywhere. You’re staying right here in this bed. Secondly you’re good at lying so why don’t you try and think of something to tell your mother.”
|posted on 23-Apr-2002 6:19:40 PM|
Before the aliens came I use to plan my life to the second. Now it feels like it’s completely out of control and I have nothing to hold on. I use to be able to hold on to Max but I feel like I’ve lost him. He has a son now, a wife, a planet, and a destiny. I think that maybe last year I had the right idea, walk away and don’t look back. I can’t, there is always something pulling me to him.
When Michael walked out of that a chamber all I could feel was jealousy. Hadn’t I been through enough for Max to want to stay for me? I was so jealous that I said things to hurt my best friend. Not just my best friend but the only one I have left. I apologized and she said that it was okay but it doesn’t make me feel any better. I’m not sure if I like this person Max it turning me into.
I don’t think I would go back though. I wasn’t living before I met Max. I didn’t know love till I met Max but I didn’t know this kind of pain either. Is it worth it? Is it worth Alex and the girl that I use to be? I’m scared of my answer even though in my heart I’ve know it all along.
How much more will I have to pay to be with Max to be with my soul mate? Can I put a price on what I feel for him? The problem is that I can’t no matter what the cost I will always love him and want to be with him. I will deal with the pain and the person that I have become.
I ran after Max as he headed towards his car and put my hand on his arm.
“What Michael said is true. I got Tess pregnant and I sent my son to another fucking galaxy.”
“Max you only did what you had to do.”
“I should have gone with them, it will always be the biggest regret of my life.” I felt the tears well up in my eyes and started to walk away.
“Liz!” I turned around to look at him tears streaming down my cheeks.
“I never wanted to hurt you Liz. I love you but I have to think of my son and put him first. If and when you can accept that I’ll be waiting for.”
“I do accept it. I just want us to be together like we use to when the whole world would melt away from a single touch.”
“You haven’t accepted it Liz. It isn’t going to be the way it was. I’m a father now and I’m going to find my son and he’s going to be a part of my life. Can you honestly say that you’re ready for that?”
“Max I love you.”
“I love you too but sometimes you can’t make it through only on love. The fairytale is over we have to deal with real life.”
“Fairytale? FAIRYTALE? What we had was never a fairytale, fairytale’s include happily ever afters and we never had one! I need to go I can’t talk to you right now.”
“No, don’t touch me. I want to fight for us but I just need some space right now. I’m not talking about forever I’m just talking about tonight so please just go.”
“I can drive you home.”
“No I’ll walk.”
I didn’t wait for Max to leave I quickly walked away and prayed that the searing pain in my chest would go away.
I lit all the candles on my balcony and lied down on the old lawn chair. I tried to keep my mind off Max. Off of Tess and the baby, off of Alex, off of life. I felt like I was falling and there was no one there. I quickly picked up the phone and dialed Michael’s number.
“What?” From the tone in Michael’s voice he was obviously annoyed, I realized that I had probably disturbed on of their sex sessions.
“Hey Michael, it’s Liz can I speak to Maria.”
“Sorry Liz she’s not her.” In the background I could hear Maria yelling at Michael to give her the phone I heard Michael grunt one last time and then I heard Maria’s cheery voice.
“Hey Lizzie what’s shaking?” I tried to find the words to say but all that came out was a sob.
“Be there in 10.” Then there was silence on the other end. I knew that I could always count on our friendship.
Thirty minutes later Maria was sitting there trying to figure out what had made me so upset. If Maria was anything it was persistent.
“Liz you can’t just call me sobbing into the phone and then not tell me what’s wrong.”
“Look I just don’t want to talk about right now I just needed a friend okay?”
“Okay but if you need me...”
“I know. So we haven’t had a chance to talk about the latest development in your relationship with Michael. Spill.” I couldn’t believe it Maria was blushing!
“Well remember how I thought that nothing could feel as good as people made it sound?” I looked at her and just nodded, shoving another spoonful of ice cream into my mouth.
“Boy was I wrong!” I looked up at her and we both burst out laughing.
“Did it hurt?”
“Well when he first you know um ,slid home it did. After a little bit though it started feeling really good. I mean mind blowingly good. It was, it was... wow!”
“It was wow?”
“Yep it was wow.”
“Achieve the big O?” I tried to hold in my laughter, I knew if I opened my mouth it would be a lost cause so I just nodded.
“On several occasions.”
“Yep it was one hundred percent wow.”
“Do you think me and Max will ever be able to be together.”
“Yea of course.”
“I think the two of you have a lot to work about but I think someday you will.”
“I hope so.” I could feel the tears spring to my eyes.
“Oh Lizzie don’t worry.” The next thing I knew I was wrapped up in one of those famous De Luca hugs. “He loves you and the two of you will find a way to work it out.”
“He has a son and I’m not the mother how are we going to work that out?”
“I don’t know sweetie, I wish I did but I don’t.”
“He called what we had a fairytale. I’ve never felt anything more real in my life.”
“I know but you know what I think what the two of you has is a fairytale, it’s magical. So you’ll slay your dragon and live happily ever after.” I looked up at Maria and smiled, I really hoped so.