posted on 21-Oct-2002 5:57:26 PM

By Belit

Disclaimer: Not mine… Don’t care…
Rating: R
Summary: I can’t write a summary without giving things away, not yet anyway… Maybe later…
Author’s Notes: A re-write of Roswell starting pre-pilot was requested, but I changed it a bit, since I simply suck at following show’s line. I made it an AU one, but it’s still pre-pilot and still a re-write, hope that counts…

Special thanks to Charlotte for beta reading it…


July 16th, 2018

“You have to do it!”

The forceful tone of the words and the defiant look in the once bubbly girl’s eyes caused Max’s heart to sink. It was sad how life had changed them. It was sad to see how bitter she had become. But that wasn’t surprising since sad was a commonly used word for them now. He was still using the word “them”… As if there still was a “them”.

Max Evans had lived through a lot at his young age, and he knew the true meaning of the word sadness. He had been tortured, he had been betrayed, deceived, belittled by the people he loved, he had seen his brother die, he had witnessed his sister waste away from unhappiness, he had lost his only love and watched her walk away from him without once looking back… And he had stood helplessly as Maria DeLuca, his best friend, breathed everyday wishing she was dead. He had failed to keep his promise to his brother.

Her long wavy hair pulled into a bun carelessly, Maria DeLuca’s posture demanded respect despite her dirty, wrinkled clothes and tired face. Max knew the story of the old eyes with bags underneath them. He knew how hard it had been for her to sleep, knowing Michael would be waiting for her in her dreams and how terrible it would feel to leave his arms in the morning and wake up. Even if it was just a dream, for Maria it was better than the reality she was living in.

“Max, please…” Her eyes begged understanding, and he did understand. He would do anything to make her happy. Anything. But he knew from past experiences what meddling in other people’s lives could cause. Although he had tried to be a couple of times, he knew he wasn’t God.

“Ria, this is not just you and me. What you want me to do will change everyone’s lives. Isabel’s, Alex’s… And even the lives of the people we’ve never met. I don’t think I have a right to do that.”

“No! What you had no right to do was to save Liz from that bullet!” Angry tears filled her eyes. Heartache was a constant in her life, but she never got used to it. Every time she breathed she could feel it burn through her lungs. They could call her selfish, Lord knew she didn’t care, but she wanted it to end.

“I know I made mistakes. Lots of them. But it’s not a good enough reason to add one more to that list.”

Max’s voice, that calm and sad tone, was the only thing that had stayed the same in her life since high school. His look had changed. It was no longer the longing, soulmates-in-love look, but had transformed into a pained but surviving one in time. Maria knew he had no one else left but her, so she pushed, knowing he would eventually cave in.

“I know what I want looks like suicide… In a way it is. But Max, if you don’t do this, I will end this torture myself soon enough. This is not right. This life we’re living can't be right. You have a chance to change the one thing that started this for us. You have a chance to make things right before we leave our miserable lives. I need you to do it. I need to know, out there, there is a small town waitress with dreams. I need to know she’ll be okay. That she’ll have a chance.”

He looked at her with his pained gaze and she knew how desperately he wanted to believe her words and act on them.

“I need to know he will be okay Max…” she whispered, tears coursing down her cheeks. “He deserves a chance. Without me. If we never get to meet, he’ll never have to do what he did.” Sobs wrecked her small body. Still, after all this time, she couldn’t even stand to think about it. No need for a suicide, she was going to die from the pain.

Max closed his eyes and clenched his fists to keep himself from reaching out for her. He knew she would flinch away from his touch. It had been almost a year since he had last touched her, or anyone else for that matter. His life –their life- was lived in solitude, with minimum contact, and close to no joy. Not the kind of life someone would want to keep, but it was the only one he had.

“You want me to do what exactly?”

Maria knew what he was asking. “I’m not asking you to let her die. She was my best friend, a part of me still loves her. Just stop the guy before he could fire, or get her out of there… You can burn the place down if you like, I don’t really care, just don’t let her find out.”

Maria couldn’t help but voice her thoughts, even though she knew they were cruel. “Even if you let her die, you should know you wouldn’t be killing her Max. There's a difference between killing someone and not saving them.”

Max’s eyes stayed firmly on the floor and she feared to have said the wrong thing. But he met her eyes and relief washed over her. For the first time in months she felt like smiling. Max was convinced. The end was near.

“For Isabel, Max. For Alex. For our parents. For Michael…” His name left her lips like a loving caress, and Max couldn’t help the jealousy he felt. He would never know what it felt like to be loved like that. Not in this lifetime.

“Let’s give us all another chance,” he said, and offered a sad but determined smile as he grabbed his car keys. “Everybody deserves a second chance.”

September 18th, 1999

Maria DeLuca sat cross-legged on the couch in the break room of The Crashdown, and closed her eyes to enjoy her one moment of peace. Ten minutes. Just for ten minutes she could sit there and dream. For ten minutes she was free to get away from life. Free to be.

Taking a vial out from her bag, she uncapped it and sniffed. Lavender. It helped her drift away from the real world, and concentrate enough to create her own.

An image of herself in a red silk dress appeared in her mind. She added some jewelry to the image. Nothing too big, just some diamond earrings and an elegant chain. Then at second thought, she placed an engagement ring on her finger. That was better.

Taking another sniff of lavender, she changed her surroundings. A stage appeared in front of her. A big stage with bright lights and a band that looked professional and respectable. She walked slowly towards it, passing an applauding audience and enjoying the flowers thrown her way. There was an air of confidence around her from being made it. She was admired, she was rich, she was singing, she was happy…

She reached the stage and took the microphone in her hands. She could almost feel its cool, smooth surface. It fit her hands perfectly, like it belonged there. Closing her eyes, she started singing. Her voice was perfect as her glossy lips formed the words. Everyone listened to her in complete silence, with awe evident on their faces. They applauded madly as she finished her song, and she smiled at them gracefully.

With one more hurried sniff from her vial, she tried to fast forward a little, knowing that her time was almost up. She tried to get to the part where she could see her fiancée, but found herself standing in a cave instead. That wasn’t a nice place to meet the man of her dreams! She tried to change it into something a little more romantic, but felt panic cover her body at the loss of control.

This wasn’t her fantasy. It felt more like a nightmare.

A cold wind was blowing around her in the dark cave. She felt movement and turned towards it. There was a man standing in the middle of a whirlwind and looking at her intently. A familiar look, a familiar man.

Then the man spoke with a familiar voice, loudly to be heard over the deafening sound of the wind around them. “I love you, Maria. Don’t you ever forget that.”

Those eyes… It was Max Evans looking at her, but his exterior was a little rougher than usual. Had he just said he loved her?

A blinding light flashed in the darkness and everything stopped, the sound, the wind, leaving her all alone in a dark cave, terrified.

“Maria? Maria, come on, your break was over like fifteen minutes ago!”

Maria's body jerked from its place on the couch, and she clutched her heart in horror. Her hands were shaking and her breathing was ragged. Examining the familiar surroundings, she tried to calm herself.

“It was just a dream. Just a freaky f-ucking nightmare…”

That was the logical explanation. Sure. But there was no logical explanation as to why on Earth would she see Max Evans tell her he loved her in a nightmare…

- - -

“Liz, can you take table four?”

Liz looked at the table skeptically. “Why? It’s just Max and Michael…”

“I… uh… I don’t feel good, so I’m gonna head to the bathroom. Don’t wanna keep them waiting…”

“Okay, if you say so… Are you okay? You look a little pale.”

“Fine. I'm fine. Just a little tired.” Casting a quick glance at Max, she turned towards the door. “I’ll be back in a minute.”

- - -

“Max, I'm telling you, there's something weird going on…” Michael said in a tense tone as his fingers played with his rings nervously.

“Like what Michael?” Max asked absentmindedly, his eyes never leaving the face of the waitress coming towards them, Liz Parker.

“Max, listen! I felt something weird. There's something wrong.” Michael sighed and sitting back, gave up. He shouldn’t have been surprised really... When had Max Evans ever listened to him?

“Hi, what can I get you guys?”

- - -

Maria stood behind the counter, and tried to keep herself busy to avoid looking at the occupants of the table four. She had especially asked to manage the counter and not walk around till she felt better. Liz had offered to give her the rest of the day off, being the perfect best friend that she was, but Maria had to refuse. It was stupid to lose her income because of a dream.

Because that was what it was. Just a dream.

But Max Evans? He wasn’t her type, besides he obviously was in love with Liz. So why would she fantasize about him? Not exactly him though, his rougher, older version. It didn’t make any sense.

She heard Agnes call Liz to the back, telling her there was someone there to see her. But she didn’t really pay attention. Her own thoughts were too loud to let her hear anything else at that moment. Then there was a commotion around one of the tables, and before she could understand what was going on around her, Maria found herself on the floor, with a hole in her dress and blood oozing from her stomach.

[ edited 4 time(s), last at 2-Nov-2002 3:01:39 PM ]
posted on 23-Oct-2002 2:41:08 PM
Hey guys,

LuvRug, I_LOVE_NICK, NewYorker, Rapunzel... Thanks for the lovely fbs!

Honestly, I was about to stop posting on this board. Finally they gave us a ML-free one! It feels stupid to just post and get no answer whatsoever...

Sherry, believe me, it really is hard to write when somebody else picks the topic for you*happy*. God, I never thought this would comeout of that poll!!! You know, I had one part written for the post-apocaliptic one, and my favourite among the other ideas was the one starting with Maria jumping off a building. They practically got like no votes!!! I'll never understand popular opinion!

And guys, sorry but nobody's healing Maria...*sad*


By Belit


Michael heard the gun shot and ducked, instinctively keeping an eye on Max. He saw in slow motion as the blond waitress – Maria - fell to the floor, her body twisted like a puppet, her lips and eyes slightly parted.

Everyone ran towards the girl and Liz Parker came in from the back. Seeing her best friend lying on the floor, her dress smeared in blood, she let out a terrified scream.

“Maria? Maria? Oh my God…” She tried to put her hands on the wound to stop the bleeding but there was so much blood. All around her… On her hands. It was warm. Maria's blood.

She felt nauseous and her surroundings started to fade, but she mentally shook herself. Her best friend was about to die. She had to do something. She couldn’t afford to faint at that moment. Later… She could faint later…

Unconscious tears coursed down her cheeks and she begged the crowd around her. “Oh God, somebody help me please… Please, do something! Maria, hang on. You're gonna be okay…”

Max headed towards the dying girl, but Michael's hand on his shoulder stopped him. He looked him in the eye, and Max knew exactly what Michael was telling him. “Max, no!”

Michael avoided the scene unfolding before his eyes, and the torn look of Max. That was the right thing to do. They had to protect Isabel. They had to protect themselves. So no matter how heart wrenching it looked, he couldn’t let Max intervene.

His hands were shaking but he tried to reason. People died everyday… They got shot, they drowned, they fell off buildings… This wasn’t anything different.

Grabbing his arm, Michael pulled Max towards the door. “Max, come on…” But Max wasn’t being cooperative. His eyes were fixed on the girl lying on the floor, partially concealed with the people gathering around. He was hypnotized.

Michael turned Max hastily and forced him to meet his eyes. “Max, in a minute this place is gonna be full of cops. It’s not good. Do you understand what I'm saying? We have to go!”

Max nodded, but Michael knew he wasn’t really understanding anything he'd said. He had to get them out of there. “Max, keys?”

Catching the keys, he pulled Max out the door. He kept his eyes firmly on the ground as they left, and never once looked back.

- - -

In the dark alley at the back of The Crashdown, a dark figure sat huddled in a corner, and sobbed for the friends he would never have, until his body completely disappeared.

- - -


Max opened his window to let Michael in. He was scowling, not really looking forward to listening Michael’s never ending lecture on how he had done the right thing. Isabel’s ongoing outrage was more than enough at the moment.

“What is it now Michael?” he asked, trying to be kind and failing.

Michael examined his life-long friend’s face, and noticed the dark circles under his eyes. Max looked like he was ready to collapse and die any minute. “You look like s-hit. What’s wrong Maxwell?”

“Other than the fact that I just killed someone?” Max asked sarcastically, in a tone Michael had never heard him use.

“You killed someone? What the f-uck are you talking about?”

“I could save her Michael! She didn’t have to die. But I didn’t do anything. I could and I just didn’t. I let her die. I killed her.”

Michael mentally rolled his eyes. This was just like Max. “First of all, you don’t even know if you could save her. You never healed anything like that before. And if you did, you know what would come afterwards. You would heal her and doom us all to our deaths. And most importantly, she’s not dead.”


“She's not dead.”

How do you know?” Max asked skeptically.

“I have my sources.” Michael said making himself comfortable on Max’s bed. “She had surgery last night, now she's in the hospital.”

Running around madly in the room, Max started to get dressed. “Uh, Max? What are you doing?” Michael asked carefully, watching his friend go through his drawers like a lunatic.

Pulling a shirt on, Max grabbed his keys and left the room in haste. “I have to see her.”

- - -

Michael scowled all the way to the hospital. He hated hospitals. He hated the idea of seeing that girl, and explaining to her why Max was so worried about her well-being all of a sudden. But he couldn’t let Max go alone. He had to be there. Not for support of course, he had to be there to keep Max from trying to heal the whole damn hospital.

He followed Max through the sterile corridors, always standing one step behind him and sulking.

Getting directions from a nurse, they entered a waiting area. Spotting Liz Parker standing next to a window, Max headed towards her.


Liz jumped slightly, and turned to look at them. It was obvious she had been crying. She looked like she was on the edge of a complete break down. “Hi, Max.” she said, her surprise evident in her eyes. “Uh, hi Michael…” she added uncertainly.

“Hey, how is she?” Max asked, his heart breaking at the sight of his Liz, so broken.

She tried to smile, but new tears gathering in her eyes made it difficult. “They said she’s stable. But they didn’t let me see her yet.” She tried to busy herself with the tissue in her hands, but couldn’t stop the sobs that shook her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I'm just… just so scared. I need to see her.”

Max knew exactly what she was feeling. He had to see Maria. Make sure she was still breathing. Make sure he hadn't killed her. But the still rational part of his brain knew that it was too early for a visit.

Max tried a reassuring smile for Liz. “I’m sure she’ll be okay Liz. She’s probably not even awake yet.”

Feeling out of place all of a sudden, Michael left the two alone, and sat on a blue plastic chair in the corner. Now that the Max situation was under control, he started to think about the uneasy feeling he’d had before the shooting. He’d known something was going to happen. Something important. Was that a new power he was developing? But why would he sense something that wasn’t even going to happen to him but to a girl he barely knew?

What was so important about Maria DeLuca?

- - -

“Where’s Max?” Isabel asked, sitting across from Michael in their usual booth.

“Where do you think?” Michael asked sarcastically, raising his eyebrows.

“Oh, don’t tell me he’s with her again?” Isabel whined, her head between her hands. “I don’t like this Michael.”

“You're telling me? He’s getting way too close with this chick.”

“What's his deal anyway? I thought he liked Liz.”


“What?” Isabel asked, forcing Michael to raise his head from his fries.

“Guilt. He feels guilty, because I didn’t let him heal her that day.”

Isabel looked at him with unbelieving eyes. “He’s finally lost it! That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

Suddenly panic settled in her eyes. “He's gonna do something stupid, isn’t he Michael? What does he do there all day?”

Michael shrugged. “I don’t know. Never went with him.”

“Well, you're going tomorrow.”

“No I'm not!”

Isabel sighed in exasperation. “Look, he would never believe me if I said I wanted to go with him. You have to go.”

“And he would believe me? You're delusional.”

“Come on Michael, just humor me.”

- - -

“Max, you know, you really don’t have to stay with me. I can… uh… do something else.” Maria mumbled lamely from her place in the white sheets of the hospital bed.

“Like what?” Max asked with an amused expression.

Maria looked around the room nervously till her eyes settled on the brown teddy bear on the night stand. “I can talk to Mr. Hideous?”

“You named him Mr. Hideous?” Max laughed, taking Mr. Hideous from its place. He feigned a hurt look. “I thought he was kinda cute.”

“No, Max, he is hideous.”

“O-kay.” Max said, still smiling playfully. “I suck at picking out presents, so sue me!”

“No, no matter how ugly he is, I still love him.”

Max put Mr. Hideous on Maria's lap, and started to pace the room, having nothing better to do.

“Really, Max, it’s been two weeks, and you came every single day. Why?” Maria asked nervously. But she had been wracking her brain about this, and she needed the answer desperately.

“At first I thought you had a crush on me or something…” she continued, seeing he wasn’t ready to talk. “…But now I know you don’t. It’s obvious how you feel about Liz.”

Max blushed a little and ducked his head. What could he say to that?

“Look, if you’re doing this for Liz, I really don’t need a babysitter…”

Max cut her nervous speech. “What? I'm not doing this for Liz! How can you think that?”

“Well, I'm sorry, but there's no other logical explanation.”

“I… I just want to be your friend. Is that okay?” Max asked looking in her eyes. It was really surprising that he meant every word.

“Okay. Okay. I’ll be your friend Max Evans.”

- - -

“Michael, what are you doing here?” Max asked, surprised to find Michael sitting comfortably in his jeep.

“I’m coming with you to see the girl.”

Max settled in his seat and put on his seat belt. “The girl has a name. Maria.”

“Yeah, whatever.” Michael grunted, not liking his scolding tone. “You got a little crush on this chick or is it still guilt dragging you to the hospital?”

“She is my friend.” Max said through gritted teeth.


“Yeah. Why is that so surprising?”

“I just don’t like the idea of you getting all cozy with a human.”

“My parents are human Michael. I like humans.”

Max’s calm words hit a nerve in Michael that his scolding tone never could. He could always kid himself, but deep down he knew that he was the only alien in the group. Max and Isabel belonged here. On Earth. With humans.

- - -

“Hi Girlfriend, it was time you came. I want to tell you something. I'm having the weirdest dreams…” Maria's voice trailed off as she saw who was standing behind Max. “Oh hi…”

God, how could someone talk so fast? Michael groaned inwardly thinking about the time that he now had to spend with this blabbermouth and her ‘girlfriend’. Thank you Isabel!

“Uh… Maria this is Michael.”

“I know who he is,” Maria said, one of her hands going up to her tousled hair in a pointless attempt to smooth it down. “Hi.”

Michael grunted a reply and dropped himself on one of the chairs at the far end of the room. Unfortunately the room was kind of small, and it did nothing to keep him out of sight.

“So, how are you today?” Max asked sitting on the bed next to her. Michael watched with the corner of his eye. They looked pretty close. Nothing romantic though, thank God!

“I'm okay. Bored out of my mind. But I'll survive.”

“How’s Mr. Hideous?” Max asked with the hint of a smile.

“Oh I missed him today! I threw him at a nurse, and the mean woman didn’t give him back to me! He’s still over there somewhere.” She pointed Michael’s direction, pouting like a kid.

“Michael can you see Mr… I mean a teddy bear there?”

Michael found the bear under a chair and walked over to the bed. He looked at the toy in his hand, it really was hideous. Who would buy something like that?

“You attacked a nurse with a teddy bear?” Michael asked smirking at the girl.

“Well, she refused to get me any more chocolate, and he was the only thing I had handy…”

Her hand reached to snatch Mr. Hideous from him, but she froze when her fingers came in contact with his skin.

Maria's heart was pounding madly as his hands traveled up her torso under her clothes. Her knees were shaking and his body was the only thing to keep her from collapsing. The only coherent thought in her mind was a question. “Is he aware of his effect on me?”

“Do you know what you're doing to me?” he voiced her question in a husky voice, his hot breath tickling her ear.

Maria moaned as his lips moved hungrily against the soft skin of her neck. “I have a pretty good idea…”

They both jumped apart with the feel, electric current running through their bodies. Michael met her wide open eyes, and felt trapped.

“I gotta go…” he mumbled, and ran out the door before Max could say anything.

posted on 25-Oct-2002 6:26:11 PM
Rapunzel, Kieran, NewYorker... Thanks soo much for feedback! Here's the new part for you... Enjoy!


Maria's stared at the closed door for minutes after Michael left. Her breathing was labored and Max could see panic settling in her eyes. He touched her trembling hand holding the teddy bear. “Are you okay?”

She yanked her hand away from his touch as a reflex. Her eyes met his, and she hated herself because of his hurt look. “Oh… I… I’m sorry…”

Max decided not to take it personally. It was obvious how shaken she felt. Her chest was rising and falling rapidly while her hands still slightly trembled.

He brought her a glass of water. He tried hard to not assume the worst, but it sure didn’t look good. Michael had fled the scene and Maria was shaking like a leaf.

She took the water gratefully. Taking a few sips, she lowered her head on her pillow. She was clutching the bear to her chest like a scared little kid. Max extended a tentative hand to her cheek to smooth the fallen lock of hair back. He knew he shouldn’t push it, but this was Maria. She had never been shy about touching him for the short period of time they had been friends.

Resting his hand on her cheek, he met her eyes. “Are you okay? What happened?”

Tears gathered in her eyes instantly. “I… I was going to tell you. I’m having some weird dreams.” Her voice was shaky, and just a notch above a whisper.

Max’s face turned serious all of a sudden. “Dreams? What kind of dreams?”

Maria swallowed her sobs and tried to compose herself. Max helped her, brushing her tears away. “Sssh… It’s okay.”

“I don’t exactly remember the dreams. They started when I came to the hospital. Usually all I can remember about them is just a feeling. I wake up feeling something and don’t know why.”

“What do you feel?” Max asked, rubbing her hand in his.

“At first it was great. I liked waking up feeling all happy for no reason. Then, in time I realized that those dreams were about someone. Other than me. A man.” She was embarrassed. It wasn’t easy to talk about something so personal. She had tried telling Liz, but her only comment had been ‘great! ’. She was the wacky friend with an overactive imagination after all, why should Liz take her seriously?

“A man? Who?”

Maria sighed with relief. He wasn’t making fun of her. “A man that I am in love with. I don’t know who he is.”

“What do you mean? I mean how can you know you’re in love with him if you're not even seeing his face?”

“I don’t remember what I see. I just know, every night in my dreams, I am in love.” She started to sob softly, her tears muffling her words. “And every morning I wake up feeling like that, and I don’t know what to do cause that person isn't here. I feel empty and a desperate need to find him. I hate feeling it, but it’s there. I want it to stop!”

Max hugged the sobbing girl and let her cry to his chest. “I want the dreams to go away Max. They are scaring me.”

He soothed her until her tears subsided. “What happened just now?” he asked softly, stroking her hair.

“That’s the weird thing. A part of one my dreams just flashed in my head. It’s never happened before. Suddenly, I just remembered.”

“What was it about?” he asked, curiously studying her face.

“Oh, I don’t think you wanna know…” she said softly, her cheeks turning red.

“Oh…” Max nodded, guessing the content from her blushing face. “Did you see his face?”

“No. I don’t know. Max, I'm so confused. It felt like it was me, but also it was someone else… What's that supposed to mean? I'm not making any sense.”

Max smiled at his new friend. That was so typically Maria. He was contemplating on how much he had come to care about her when he noticed her I'm-about-to-make-the-greatest-discovery look. “What?” he asked, waiting to hear another one of her weird theories that usually made no sense whatsoever.

“Do you believe in reincarnation?”

- - -

“Hey Max.”

Maria's eyes searched the corridor behind Max, but it was empty. Max noticed her expectant look towards the door. Weird. “I didn’t see Michael today,” he explained, feeling the need to say something.

“Oh. I must have scared him yesterday with my shaking and staring...” She tried to laugh it off, but Max noticed her trying to hide something else under that laugh. “He probably thinks I'm demented or something. God knows he couldn’t run fast enough,” she said looking at her hands resting on her lap.

“No, no. It’s just like Michael to make weird exits like that. Believe me, it wasn’t you.”

She raised her head and tried to look nonchalant. “Tell him that I apologize when you see him, okay?”

“Okay.” Max nodded, thinking it would probably be a first for Michael. Somebody actually apologizing to him instead of expecting one from him. “I brought the books you wanted.”

He dropped some books on her lap. “But I still think it’s stupid.”

“Why not Max? You got a better explanation?” she said, opening one of the books.

“They could be just random dreams…”

“They’re not.” She raised her head and looked him in the eye, her face totally serious for once. “Everyday, I go through morning to noon in a daze. I can't shake the feeling. Normal dreams don’t do that to a person.”

“Okay. Then, why now? Why not before?” he reasoned, trying to find an explanation.

“Well, you know, near death experiences can trigger some old memories…” she said seriously.

Max’s brow furrowed. “Can they?”

Maria burst out laughing. “I honestly have no idea!”

Sitting on her hospital bed, laughing with Max Evans, Maria remembered another dream she’d had. “Max? I think this dream thing started before that…”

“What? When?” he asked sobering up a little from their laughing frenzy.

“I saw you,” she said, her eyes fixed firmly on his face. Her fingers traced non-existent lines around his eyes. “Your face was different. You were older.”

“You saw me?” he asked, surprised and a little scared. Knowing about dreamwalking and all, dreams weren't just dreams for him.

“Yes. You told me you loved me,” she whispered, looking in his eyes.

He panicked. Was she saying that he was the man in her dreams? The thought was kind of honoring, but also extremely disturbing. She couldn’t mean that she was in love with him, could she?

“It was right before I got shot. I saw you in a cave. You said you loved me, and there was wind, and it was dark… And then you were gone, and I was alone in the cave.” She closed her eyes and tried to remember. “I think that’s it. Then I got shot, and the dreams of that other guy began.”

Max sighed. So it wasn’t him. But this dream of hers was weird. Could it mean something? She had seen a cave…

Max shrugged. “But it did come true. I do love you. You're one of my best friends.”

Maria rewarded him with a dazzling smile. Throwing her arms around him, she hugged him tightly. “I love you too Max,” she said happily, not noticing her best friend entering the room.

Max pulled back slightly, putting his hand on her stomach. “Hey, easy, you'll hurt yourself.”

Carefully settling back on the bed she had come to loathe with a passion, she saw Liz standing next to the door, watching them nervously.

“Oh, hi Liz.”

“Hi.” Liz said in a somewhat scared and shocked tone.

Max blushed when he met her eyes. It was really hard being in the same room with her outside the school and The Crashdown. They had never really been friends, and he was lacking the vocabulary to talk to her in a friendly situation. He wished he could be half as relaxed with her as he was with Maria.

“I gotta go,” he said, choosing the easy way out. He kissed Maria on the cheek and forced himself to look in Liz’s eyes. “Bye Liz.”

- - -

“You got a flash from her?”

“Yes, Max. I got a flash from her,” Michael repeated himself in an exasperated tone.

“That never happened before.”


“What did you see?” Max asked curiously. But he knew the answer before Michael could speak - his look was enough to confirm his fears.

He couldn’t stop his grin. “You saw her dream,” he stated, looking at Michael with amusement.

“What dream?”

“She’s having weird dreams about a guy. She said she remembered it when she touched you.” Max chuckled, thinking how disturbing it must be for Michael. “So how was it?”

Michael thought about it for a moment, but words failed to describe the feeling. “Intense,” he said.

“I bet. She's losing it because of those dreams.”

The thought of having those dreams every night was kind of appealing for Michael. He didn’t even consider having those feelings for real, it seemed impossible, but in dreams… Now that could be fun…

“She asked me to tell you that she was sorry.”

“For what?”

Max rolled his eyes. “She thinks she scared you.”

That was funny. That ditzy, little girl had nothing to scare him…

- - -

Liz tried to voice the question in her head as she fluffed Maria's pillows. “Are you… and Max… you know?”

Maria suppressed her smirk. “Are we what?”

“Well you know… dating or something?” she asked uncomfortably, her eyes fixed on the floor.

“You're jealous!” Maria exclaimed, unable to contain her laughter any longer.

“I'm not… Okay… Maybe a little…”

“That’s ridiculous Liz!”

“I'm sorry, but you're spending so much time with him, and you're always so close… I just assumed…”

“You have nothing to worry about Lizzy, I won't steal your admirer…”

Liz looked at her with shock. “It wasn’t him I was jealous of!”

“What?” Maria searched her face with surprise. “Oh, Lizzy…”

“You don’t talk to me anymore like you talk to him! I missed talking to you. Alex is great and all, but he's not you Ria.”

Maria hugged her friend carefully, trying not to put too much pressure on her stomach. “Come on Liz, you know you're my best friend. You'll always be my best friend. But Max has been a great friend to me lately. He's such a good guy. I like spending time with him.”

“He would’ve made a great boyfriend if he wasn’t so hung up on you…” Maria said, her eyes shining with mischief.


“What? He is! Why don’t you give him a chance?”

“You know I'm dating Kyle.”

“You're not serious, right? I mean, come on, Kyle’s like… a jock… and you're such a bright girl. I doubt he even understand half the things you're telling him.”

“But he's a great guy. Understanding, sweet, loyal… and he's handsome… I'm not looking for anything more.”

Maria sighed, and shook her head. She had been thinking the same way till the dreams started. Now, after feeling what it felt like to have that special person, that once in a lifetime love, that insatiable passion… She knew she wouldn’t settle for anything less.

posted on 27-Oct-2002 5:59:30 AM
Thanks for the feedback guys... Here's your new part, enjoy!


“You're not going.”

Liz was looking at her with a disapproving look. Her arms were crossed in front of her, and she was standing as though she was trying to block her way out. Maria would have laughed at her motherly attitude if she wasn’t so wired.

She faced Max and smiled sweetly. “Max?”

“I'm sorry,” he said shaking his head. “I have to agree with Liz. I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

She stomped her feet like a little girl. “Come on guys! It’s just Madame Vivian. You think mom would've let me go if she was dangerous?”

They didn’t look convinced. Those scientific people… She would never understand the way their brains worked. She was surprised to find out once again how much alike they were. Liz was such a fool…

“Look, Ria… I just don’t want you to get all caught up in this dream thing. It’s just dreams, you shouldn’t let yourself get so effected by them.”

Maria took deep breaths to suppress her anger. She calmly walked over to Max who was sitting on the old couch, and grabbed his index finger. She brought his finger up to her face under their surprised gazes, and brushed it against the soft skin under her eye. Then pressed it against the wall, leaving a trail of concealer behind.

She faced them once more, wrapping her arms around her waist. “They are effecting me. It’s not a matter of me letting them anymore. Liz, you know I never wear that much make up. I haven’t had a good night’s sleep for over a week now. I have to do something. I can't let this take over my life.”

Remembering the times she had noticed Maria drink black coffee instead of her usual coke or milkshake, Liz couldn’t help but blame herself. What kind of a friend was she? She should've noticed it a long time ago.

She hugged her sincerely, and relaxed when she felt her arms wrap around her in response. “I'm so sorry.”

“I thought they weren't scary. Why aren't you sleeping?”

Maria sat on the couch next to Max, and let her eyes drop to her lap. This wasn’t a question she wanted to answer, not even to herself, let alone her friends. “They’re not scary, they feel good. And that’s kinda the main problem…” she mumbled.

Max met Liz’s eyes, and saw her concern there, mirroring his own. “What do you mean Maria?” he said letting his hand stroke her back in a soothing rhythm.

Maria forced herself to be brave. Just say it already! She raised her head, and blurted it out before she could change her mind.

“I’m scared that one day I won't want to wake up anymore.”

- - -

“So?” Maria asked Madame Vivian expectantly. She was so nervous, it was just a matter of time before she broke one of her fingers while playing with them under the table. “What do you see?”

“Those dreams you have, they are real.”

Maria held her breath. The woman was talking so certainly, she couldn’t help but trust her words.

“They are?”

“They are real. They show the future.”

The relief that washed over her at the woman’s words surprised Maria. Was that what she wanted?

“Wha..? What's that supposed to mean?” Maria stuttered in anticipation.

“They are not prophetic though,” the woman continued, ignoring her question.

“You mean they won't come true? Then how do they show the future?” she insisted, showing Madame Vivian that patience wasn’t a virtue she had.

“It’s not your future. Your future is yet to be determined,” Madame Vivian said in a calm voice, still keeping her cool.

“Then why the hell are they in my head?” Maria shrieked, getting frustrated with all the cryptic talking. “How the hell did someone else’s future end up in my head?”

Madame Vivian looked at her with her mysterious look, and ruined the whole act with a shrug.

“How would I know?”

Maria's eyes flashed with anger. “How would you know? Last time I checked you were the prophet in the room.”

“I can't see what you want me to see. I can only tell you what comes to me.”

The woman’s calm voice that once seemed trustworthy was getting on her nerves now. “God dammit!” she shouted slamming her hands on the table.

Madame Vivian rolled her eyes, and extended her hands to her in exasperation. “Okay, give me your hands.”


“Shut up, and give me your hands.”

Maria complied, scared that maybe the woman had other gifts except being a prophet. It wasn’t a good day to turn into a frog. Or a dog. Or a snail. Yuck!

Madame Vivian closed her eyes and concentrated. Minutes passed without a move, and Maria started to get fidgety. The woman’s face was freaky. Then suddenly she opened her eyes.

“She lost him,” she said, looking rather sad for a change.

Maria knew immediately who she was. The owner of the memories… “She did?”

The prophet nodded. “He died.”

“Oh my God!” Maria said, her eyes filling with tears. She had only had a glimpse of her love, but even with her limited knowledge she knew there would be no life after a loss like that.

“And now she's haunting me?” she shrieked, the thought of a sad ghost around her giving her chills. “I didn’t kill him!”

“I don’t think she's haunting you. Maybe you need to learn something from this?” Madame Vivian offered. She wasn’t getting paid for this. Ghosts weren't her specialty.

“Oh, gee, thanks. A ghost is trying to give me a lesson! Sure!”

The woman shrugged again, making herself look much younger and less wiser. “I'm not here to solve your problems. I just tell what I see.”

“How am I going to get rid of those?”

“I don’t know.”

- - -

Maria stormed out of Madame Vivian’s place and threw herself at the backseat of Max’s jeep. She felt two pairs of eyes turn to her expectantly, but she definitely wasn’t in the mood. They were going to say “I told you so,” which was the most annoying group of words in the world history.

“Just drive!” she said through gritted teeth, keeping her eyes on the desert.

She could try to kid herself, and say that she was pissed because Madame Vivian didn’t have the answers she wanted –that was probably what she was going to tell the others -, but she knew the true origin of her anger. It was coming from disappointment and fear.

She was disappointed. It wasn’t her future. It wasn’t her love. He wasn’t hers, and never would be. She had to be cursed, getting to feel something like that just to learn she would always crave for it without ever really having it. Was it healthy to hope that maybe at least the dreams could stay, and she could keep feeling it? Was it normal?

She was scared. Was she ever going to have a love like that? Since that wasn’t hers, was she going to have one that belonged to her? She doubted it. She could see clearly how much her expectancies had increased. Was anyone ever going to meet those?

She looked around, and felt suddenly trapped in the car. She was suffocating. “Pull over.”

“What?” Max protested, meeting her eyes in the mirror.

“I need to be alone right now Max, I’ll walk the rest of the way.”

“Maria, it’s dark…” Liz started, but Maria cut her off with a gesture.

“I’ll be okay, I’ve got my cell phone. I’ll call one of you if I need anything.”

- - -


Michael looked down at the source of the sound. It was dark, but he could make out a figure lying under the tree.

“You crunched my fingers!”

It was a familiar voice, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. He crouched down, to see her face.

Oh… That Maria chick…

“What the f-uck are you doing lying here?”

Maria looked at him, fuming with anger. “What? What about an apology buddy?”

“What for?” Michael said, with an infuriating smirk on his face.

“What for?! What about breaking my fingers with your huge feet and ugly shoes?”

“My shoes aren't ugly, and I didn’t break your damn fingers!”

He reached for her hand and pulled it roughly, touching her fingers. “They look good to me…”

“Ahh… It hurts you jerk!” she pulled them back, but he held tighter.

“What are you doing out so late? I thought Max was taking you home?” he asked threateningly, holding her fingers hostage.

She smirked. “Do you always memorize Max’s schedule?”

“Oh don’t worry, I won't steal your girlfriend. So what are you doing here?”

“None of your damn business!” she exclaimed, pulling her hand free. She tried to get up, mumbling to herself. “I’ll never understand how a jerk like you can be friends with such a sweet guy.”

“I think he can handle me if he can stay in the same room with you for more than an hour…” Michael retorted, brushing the dust from his jeans. He watched her try to get up and fail a couple of times, then held out his hand to her, more from exasperation than his desire to help.

“Come here…” he said gruffly.

“I don’t need your help…” she said, but her sentence was cut off when he grabbed her hand and pulled her up roughly, causing her to stumble and hold on to his arm.

Familiar tingles spread through her body. She started to shake as her vision blurred. Then it came, throwing her into another world.

“You wanna get married?” she asked, thinking how she'd never imagined that she'd be the one proposing.

He shrugged, his eyes still glued on the tv.

“What's that supposed to mean? Either you want it, or you don’t. Which one is it?”

“Doesn’t matter…” he mumbled, watching the game intently.

“Doesn’t matter?” she yelled, throwing her hands in the air. “Great! It doesn’t matter. Who cares, right?” She walked towards the bedroom. She wasn’t going to cry in front of him, and humiliate herself even more.

Throwing herself on the bed, she pulled the comforter to cover her and buried her face in the pillow. His scent assaulted her senses, teasing her with the fact that she would never be able to leave him, no matter how much of a jerk he was. She knew that, but it never lessened her pain.

She felt the comforter being pulled, and she hid her face. She hated the way she looked when she cried. With puffy eyes, and a red nose…

His hands gently grabbed her shoulders and turned her around. “Don’t, please…” she said through her tears as she faced him. She kept her eyes closed, hoping maybe he wouldn’t see her if she didn’t see him.

Climbing on top of her, he cupped her face in his large palms, and caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, brushing her tears away. “I am not going to leave you,” he said and softly kissed her quivering lips, tasting her tears. “I don’t care if we’re married or not. There's nothing on this world, or any other for that matter, that can keep me away from you. And I won't let you go. Ever. I'm sorry, but no divorce, no break ups. You're not going anywhere. Even if I need to chain you to this bed, you're staying with me.”

Her eyes opened at his words. She knew she should be mad at him, being all caveman-like and threatening to chain her… But she wanted the chain this time. She needed him to keep her. For good.

“So you want marriage? Let’s get married. I don’t care. I don’t need it. I’m not letting you go, with or without it. I can't. You're mine. I need you.”

Wrapping her arms around his neck, she kissed him. Her heart was beating madly, her love for him pouring out of her. “What about children?” she asked, panting from his kisses.

“You want children?” he asked, with a clueless, shocked expression on his face. She loved that expression. It was just like him to think that they would be together forever, but forget to think about children. She loved him for it.

“Yes. Not now, but one day. I want to have your baby,” she said shyly.

“Okay. If you want to.”

“If I want to? You don’t want it?”

He looked at her with the hint of a smile evident on his shocked face. “I want girls. Three of them. They will all look like you.”

She touched his face, her chin quivering. “God, I am so in love with you.”

posted on 2-Nov-2002 2:59:53 PM
Hey guys,

I am sorry to inform you that I won't be posting this story here anymore. I just don't have time to post on a couple of boards. If you want to read more of this or my other fics, you can check out CID or my site Belit's Planet .

I'm really really sorry about that!!!
posted on 16-Nov-2002 5:44:55 PM
I'm sorry! *sad* I'm not updating this fic here anymore! You can find it at CIDup to Part Nine, hopefully more will be up there soon!