|posted on 5-May-2002 8:29:14 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Title: My So-Called Life In Roswell|
Disclaimer: Sadly.. neither My So-Called Life (My all-time favorite tv show), nor Roswell belong to me.
Summary: Yep, I decided to take my love of MSCL and try and blend it in with Roswell. So there will be some obvious quotes and stuff that were taken from MSCL. (Notice all the "likes") Hehe. Anyway, umm.. yeah. I'm kind of nervous about posting this. Lol. Anyway.. I'll stop talking now and post it. I tried to differentiate between Liz's thoughts and third person. I hope it worked well and didn't confuse you. =/
Just to be helpful...
Part 2~ Pg. 2
Part 3~ Pg. 4
Part 4~ Pg. 6
Part 5~ Pg. 8
Part 6~ Pg. 11
Part 7~ Pg. 13
Part 8~ Pg. 14
Part 9~ Pg. 16
Part 10~ Pg. 17
Part 11~ Pg. 20
Part 12~ Pg. 22
When I was little I wondered why the sky was blue..
Then I wondered why the seasons changed,
Then I wondered why boys had cooties,
Then I wondered why I started liking boys..
Well, then I wondered why I was alive.
Now I'm wondering the same thing.
Ever just like, look at someone and completely wonder what they're thinking. Like, observe them. Look at their expressions and just... wonder. I'll look over at him, the guy that gets all A's and is in all honors classes, with the highest GPA in the school, and I wonder what goes on in his head. He always has this cool, calm and collective look on his face. I can't really tell if it's a mask or what. He's the guy that's lived across the street from me since like, forever. He always comes over to borrow things. I think my younger sister has a crush on him.
And then.. I'll glance over to the empty seat on my left and wonder where the girl so many people have termed as "the slut" is. Off skipping class to make out in the Eraser Room with her current fling? And then.. then, I'll ever so casually crane my neck so that I get a glimpse at the guy in the back of the room. He's never really there. I mean, his body is there, in that seat.. he's not skipping class or anything.. but he's just not there. It's like.. he's out of it or something. I never really hear him answer a question. He is termed as "the rebel." He was left back, twice. He's the guy that passes auto shop and is obsessed with his car, and his guitar. And there's this one... thing about him. He's always closing his eyes, like it hurts to look at things...
Then I'll look at myself.. I'm just.. boring. And here I am.. wondering why I'm alive.
I think I'm the kind of person who tends to blend in with the crowd. I really don't have any distinctive qualities. My brown hair.. that's plain. My brown eyes.. those are plain. My clothes.. those are plain. Everything about me is plain... and plain things have a tendency to be boring. So, now I'm wondering why I'm so boring, and why I'm alive.
Don't get me wrong. I don't want to kill myself, or commit suicide. And this isn't even a cry for help. These are just my thoughts.
On the way to her locker, Liz noticed her best friend, Isabel, standing by it and decided to turn the other way and leave in the direction of the bathroom. Isabel and her had been drifting apart recently. Liz was changing.
Isabel was the perfect one. The girl with all A's, on the cheerleading team, and the yearbook committee.. Liz was on the yearbook committee.. but she didn't care much for it. And right now, she didn't want to be a perfect kid anymore. She felt.. well, rebellious.
Once Liz entered the girls' bathroom, she found the "slut" of the school in there applying make-up.
"Hey there. Liz, right?" She said, pulling a bottle of water out of her purse.
I wondered why Maria DeLuca was drinking water. I'd heard a lot of rumors about Maria. The funny thing was, Maria, like, knew about all the rumors, and she didn't care. Sometimes I wonder if Maria made up some of those rumors herself.
"Want a sip?"
Maria held out the water bottle to Liz and winked.
"Vodka" She added.
Liz's eyes widenend for a minute in shock, but then she gingerly took the bottle and took a sip. This was Maria DeLuca.. she shouldn't be shocked at anything Maria did.
"I think you're in my English class" Liz said. Maria laughed.
"Yeah.. when I'm there."
You know. This girl is real. I mean, she IS real. She doesn't pretend to like, be anything other than who she really is. I can admire that about her. I feel.. like I'm actually letting go. Like I'm being myself, in this odd, strange way. I don't feel like I'm forcing myself to hold my tongue back, like I do.. with my best friend.
"You know. Your hair would look really cool if it had some red in it. Like, red streaks or something. You have potential, Liz. You're just oozing to be free, and I think your hair is holding you back." Maria said, breaking Liz from her thoughts. Liz smiled.
Okay, this is going to be a knew me. Liz Parker... the rebellious one. Okay, so maybe I can't exactly be rebellious. Maybe it's something that I'm, like, incapable of being. But, maybe it'll make me be more like myself. If that makes any sense.
So, when Maria DeLuca told me that my hair was holding me back, I had to listen to her, because she wasn't just talking about my hair. She was talking about my life.
And then.. I had to face my parents.
* I have a question for you guys. If you would like me to continue writing this.. would you prefer Max to play the role of Brian and Michael to play the role of Jordan Catalano, OR, me to make Max be Jordan. It's pretty much up to you, cuz I could write it either way.*
Okay.. I'm gonna face my fear and post this.. on the count of three..
Three.. *Takes a deep breath and closes her eyes*
[ edited 13time(s), last at 2-Jan-2003 9:29:51 PM ]
|posted on 6-May-2002 11:40:07 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Hey, tis I again. Mwah haha.|
Okay, first of all, the following part ties a lot into the pilot of MSCL, but don't worry, I'll have more like.. Roswell elements in it later on. As for Max, he will become more Max-like later.. but for now.. yeah.. well, you'll see. Lol. I hope it doesn't seem too choppy or anything. It's kind of hard to go back and forth between third person and POV, but it wouldn't really be fitting if I did the whole thing in just POV.. anyway, I shall stop rambling and post the next part. Well, after I say my thanks to each and every one of you.
Kayarra~ Hehe. Thanks for the FB.
BillyHoliday~ Yeah. Jordan was somewhat of an asshole. I'll take your advice.
carenicoleIQ~ Oooh. Compliments. Thank you, yeah I like a rebellious Max too.
m14~ I loved Jordan too! I look at him and I'm all like "purrr" and then *pounce*.
Kitcat26~ Awww, you probably would have totally loved MSCL. As for that Woodstock challenge, it's kind of like, complex. And since I'm just now really starting to write fanfic, I'm gonna hold off on that for awhile. Thanks though.
Joscelynn~ Lol. I really got into MSCL when they started showing reruns of episodes on MTV. Before then I think I was too young to really remember watching it. I know that if I had, I would have done ANYTHING to keep that show on. *sigh* Sadness. Thank you so much for the wonderful FB.
Meagzie~ Yaya! I got a compliment from Meagzie! Happy me! Thank you so much, yo're like, one of my favorite writers and that means a lot to me.
Cinder~ Thank you so much for the ideas with the characters. I'll use most of them. Hehehe. >=D. And before you even posted I wa thinking... hmmm.. Michael could be like Tino.
roswellluver~ Thanks for the FB.
Ice Rose~ Thanks~
Bronwen~ I immediately thought of Maria to be the free-spirited one that Liz would like, reach out to. Thanks for the FB. Yaya! You love the Crow too! And here I thought I was living in my own little dark world of having this obsesion with The Crow and Brandon Lee.. mwah ahha. That's my favorite movie.. Hehe..
Okay, now I'll like, start. Oh psh, I'm writing this too much, I'm starting to say like a lot now..
I hope this next part doesn't disappoint. =/
My parents aren't exactly bad. My dad's more "hip", I guess you could say. He's like, more into the "now". My mom, she's kind of overprotective. So.. when they saw the red in my hair.. I think the only reason they took it well was because of the look on my face..
Liz made her way down the stairs to the kitchen table for dinner. This would be the moment of truth. She wasn't particularly fond of the way her hair turned out. Maybe she'd just have to get used to it.
Nancy took one glance at Liz before her jaw dropped,
"Liz.. what did you.. do to your hair?"
"Mom, just don't.."
"It's Crimson Glow, mom."
The family sat down in silence, picking at their food.
My dad's the cook. See, my parents own this restaurant here called "The Crashdown", and like, it's where all the tourists go. I can't believe how gullible some people actually are. Especially when it's, like, tourist time. It's pathetic actually... almost as pathetic as my annoying little sister, Tess.
"Well, it's not too bad," Nancy began, trying to ease her daughter's annoyed look. "We can always spot you in a crowd."
Elizabeth shot a glare at her mother as she began driving her knife into the meat on her plate over and over again.
Lately, I can't even look at my mother without wanting to stab her.. repeatedly.
Liz just got out of the shower, and wrapped a towel around herself when the phone rang.
"Lizzy," Her father yelled to her. Liz came running to the phone and her father just looked at her, still holding the phone, obviously uncomfortable.
Me and my dad used to hang out. Watch sports on tv and stuff. Lately we haven't been able to. The truth is, I think my breasts have come between us.
"You shouldn't walk around the house with a towel, Liz."
"Dad.. the phone?"
"Right." Jeff said, handing her the phone
Liz was surprised to find Maria had called her.
"Oh my God, Liz. Like, you have so got to come with me and Alex to this club. The Frozen Embryo's are playing.. and you know Michael.."
"The Frozen Embryos? Isn't that Max's ban.."
"Max Evans? Yeah.. but you know, Michael put the band together."
As I was talking to Maria, I felt this smile creep onto my face. I think it was the knowledge that that one guy in my English class.. you know, the one I mentioned before.. who wasn't exactly always there.. was going to be playing at the club.
And I think Maria has some kind of sixth sense or something.. because the first thing she asked me when she and Alex picked me up.. which was after, like.. a lot of begging my mother on my part.. was
"So, Max Evans huh?"
"Well.. I just like the way he.. leans."
They gave me this look. You know the look where, like, they know there's more to the story than you're telling them and they're just giving you THAT look, like they're expecting you to say more.
"He leans great."
Alex and Maria burst out laughing.
"Hey, you guys. If you were about to do it.. like, with someone, what would you say?" Alex suddenly asked out of nowhere.
"This won't take long?" Maria chimed in answer, jokingly.
"No, seriously." Alex responded.
"Don't I know you?" Maria continued her joking.
"No, like.. romantic."
Liz thought about it for a minute. She thought about Maxwell Evans.. and how he always closed his eyes. And she smiled, getting a dreamy look on her face before answering,
"You're so beautiful, it hurts to look at you."
"It hurts to look at you?" Maria and Alex asked in unison.
"Whe.. where would it hurt?" Maria asked, laughing.
"No, that's good. I like it, Liz" Alex said, smiling.
So then it was just the three of us in that car. Alex driving with Maria in the front and me in the back. And I felt free. Here I was going to this club, about to see Max Evans with two of my knew friends, Alex and Maria.
Alex is a really cool guy.. he's kind of like one of the girls. Ya know. It's really easy to talk to him and tell him anything, well if you wanted to. He seems to have a good sense of fashion too, I guess one might think he's gay. I think.. he wears eyeliner. But he's like Maria. He's himself, and he's not afraid of that. So now, I feel like I can be more of myself.
I see the beginning of a great friendship forming.
They reached the club and waited at the entrance to be let in.
"Ummm, Maria?" Liz asked.
"Yeah," Maria said, before chugging more alcohol from a bottle.
"Don't we like, need ID's to get in?"
"Not with me. Look, this is the advantage of being a girl.. just watch my lead."
"What about me?" Alex said.
"We won't go in without you." Liz assured him.
Maria set her eyes on two older guys, one with brown hair and the other with blond, and immediately made her way towards him
"Hey, can you guys get us in?" She asked.
The brown haired guy answered
"What? The didn't let you in? How old are you guys anyway?" Maria didn't answer, and stepped back towards Alex and Liz.
"You," the blond guy said, pointing to Maria. "Come here. I wanna ask you something."
"Well, ask me from here."
"I want to ask you here." Maria slowly stepped over to him.
The blond guy smirked at Maria, and leaned down to kiss her. She pulled away, hesitantly.
"Come on, too young?" The guy asked, mockingly.
"I don't take orders, and I'm not stupid." Maria said. The guy grabbed her harshly,
"But you came when I called you."
I realized that something was actually happening. I think Alex did too, he looked scared for Maria. Sometimes, I think he likes to protect her.
"Let me go" Maria said, struggling to get away from the guy's grasp. The guy proceeded to roughly kiss her neck.
"Come on, quit it." Liz said, trying to be forceful.
Maria pushed the guy away from her and broke free.
"I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself."
Alex and Liz grabbed Maria as the effects of the alcohol seemed to be taking it's toll on her, and she stumbled along with them.
"Let's go." Alex said. "She won't remember any of this tomorrow."
I guess I should have recognized something there. Maybe I didn't let myself. Maria was drunk and I was worried about her, but then I guess Alex's next words, like, comforted me in a way.
"It happens all the time."
Then, the three saw a police car heading towards them, and the two guys started cursing.
"You are so dead", the brown haired guy said to the blond.
"You know these girls?" The police officer asked, rolling down his window and looking at the two older men.
"Ooooh, Mr. Police officer." Maria giggled, making her way over to the passenger's window and peaking her head in. "Could you ring the siren. PLEASE!!!"
Max Evans made his way outside with the band, and he saw the girl with brown hair and red streaks in it.
"Relax, I'm not going to arrest you." The police officer said to the three of them, but made a stern glance towards the two men.
The three got in the cop car and as Max saw them entering it, he spoke.
"Hey, I know that girl."
I was kind of mad at Maria. For getting us into this, but she really didn't mean to get us into anything. Maybe back in my subconscious, I was like, really mad about her drinking. But then.. she said something. Something a friend says.
"I'll always watch out for you. And I'll always be there for you, K?"
There really wasn't anything else for me to say but
The cops first stopped at Maria's house. I wondered how her mom would feel about seeing her daughter drunk like this. My mom would, like, totally kill me if she ever saw me like that. But when we got there.. no one was home.
When the police reached Liz's house, Sean, the smartest kid in Liz's school was standing there in her driveway.
"Could you please not come to my door?" Liz asked to policeman.
The police officer glanced towards Sean and asked
"Are you a friend of hers?"
"Yeah." He said.
"Well then act like it." The police officer responded firmly before letting Liz get out of the car.
"So.." Sean began, "What happened?"
"These guys started hitting on us." Liz said.
"Like.. sexual harassment?"
"Look Sean, I gotta go." Liz said before making her way to her house.
Sean watched the girl he'd known forever leave, and he wondered why suddenly he had this obsession over her. He didn't like the red streaks in her hair, and he didn't like the "new" her. He kind of missed the old Liz Parker. Either way, he still had a crush on her. But it was something that she'd never know about, because he would never tell her.
The next day at school.. was like, great. I actually talked to Maxwell Evans. It wasn't, like very long, or anything...
"Hi.. out on bail?" Max asked.
"Uh.. yeah. Something like that." Liz said, awkwardly. "So.. how was your weekend?"
"It sucked." He said, glancing around. "Gotta go."
The sad thing was.. that those few sentences between us were like, embedded in my head, and I couldn't really get over the fact that Max Evans actually talked to me. He talked to me. I didn't even think he knew I was alive.. but, he does. Maybe tomorrow.. he'll like, talk to me again. And like, we could actually get somewhere. Okay, now I'm just wishful thinking.
The muffled sounds of rumors filled the halls, and a girl yelled.
"Oh my God, Maria, you are so full of it."
"Just ask Alex, it was totally wicked."
Liz came walking towards the group with a smile on her face.
"Hey there, chica." Maria said. "Ask Liz, she was there.
"So they were being picked up by these guys, right." Alex began.
"And then the cops came." Maria interjected. "We so had a time." She looked to Liz and asked "Didn't we have a time?" As a sly smile creeped her lips.
"We did. We had a time". Liz said.
And we did. I don't think that I'll ever forget that night. I love hanging out with Alex and Maria. It's just.. like, the three of us now. And we all understand eachother.. I really think this friendship is seriously going to, like, go somewhere. Somewhere good.
But then, I glanced across the hallway as I listened to Alex and Maria talking, and I saw Isabel. Only, I didn't feel bad. I didn't feel like I was abandoning her or anything. Because, I saw her with other people. Other people who were like her, and I think she knew we were both changing too.
Abbs007~Ahhh! I just found your reply after I posted this. Thanks for the FB!
[ edited 2 time(s), last at 7-May-2002 12:18:32 AM ]
|posted on 9-May-2002 7:08:35 PM by Wench On A Leash|
abbs007, mpls muse, LixMix5, roswellluver, LilEvEe, Rapunzel, BronWen (Thanks for that bump!), frenchkiss70, and Chrissy~ Thanks so much for the FB and everything. It's all inspiring.
mandyhanford~ Yep. Sean is Brian. Mwah haha, I just had to to di, and it's actually turning out pretty well like that.
Joscelyn~ Aww. Hehe. Giddiness is great. And yes, I know that feeling. Writing this is bringing back memories, and I'm all sad. I want to watch MSCL again. And the feeling of belonging thing does make sense. And as for your PS, that was the first thing that struck me about the show. How real it was. And Claire Danes had so much raw emotion on her face, like the characters of Roswell do.. especially in S1. =) The show was truly great, and one of a kind.
Lizzi_Parker17~ Aww. Seattle.... brings back memories of all my favorite bands.. Nirvana, Alice In Chains, Pearl Jam... Hehe. The Cranberries were great. I love them. I remember the very first time I heard "Dreams" on MSCL. *sigh*
Cinder~ Hehe. It wouldn't be Roswell w/o aliens in it now would it? And I would NEVA EVA go with the storyling of Max sleeping with Maria... that's just.. not in my dreamer mind.
Katalina~ If I made Michael be Jordan, Liz would have been obsessing over him, and they would have kissed a couple times, but I would have ended up doing the Mi/M sleeping together thing, and Liz end up w/Max. You would have gotten minor Polarist, but it's good that you're also a dreamer, cuz with me writing, it's always Max and Liz. Lol. I'm glad you like the way it's going though.
Eerie~ I haven't seen it on the fan fic discussion board. Then again, I've only recently been checking the board. =/. I'm glad you like it though.
Kitcat26~ Hehe. That was a memorable line from MSCL and I had to use it. Glad you liked it. I was so pissed about the Wings game too >=D. But I think they're going to show that ep. of Roswell some other time, I just gotta find out when. Hmph. As for the Alex being gay thing.. I haven't really decided. In MSCL, Rickie was gay, but I might want to make Alex just be one of those guys that people think is, but not really be. I dunno. We'll see what happens. Lol. My mind is ever changing.
Meagzie~ Hehe. These were quotes from MSCL as well. I loved them, and Had to use them. Lol. Thanks for the FB. I'm all happy.
just_me~ Yes, Michael is very Tino-ish. Lol. Thanks for the great FB... and longest reply you've ever posted. Wow, that's like, a compliment. Hehe. Thanks.
Okay, so there's no confusion for you all.. here's the characters..
Kyle (Sharon's jock bf)~ Kyle
Brian~ Sean (Mwah haha)
Patty (Angela's mom)~ Nancy
Graham (Angela's dad)~ Jeff
If more come up, I'm sure you can guess..
Okay, now that all the character confusion is out of the way.. here we go...
Liz sat in Biology as the latest video with corny music and corny actors started explaining... the solar system and debating on whether aliens existed or not. She didn't seem so focused on the movie. She leaned her chin in her hand and sat there. The ever present teacher terms this as... daydreaming.
I should probably tell you how Isabel and I became best friends in the first place. You see, my mom and her mom were best friends when they went to school together. Oddly enough, my mother and my father went to the same school highschool.. only they didn't exactly know eachother until after they graduated. My mom was like, this really popular girl. Apparently she was like.. homecoming Queen or something. I guess her popularity made up for her feelings of abandonment or something. She was adopted when she was younger, and she doesn't tell me this, but she has problems with being abandoned. I can tell. I think that's why she's so overprotective. My dad, on the other hand, he was a geek back then. But a cool one. Anyway, me and Isabel have been best friends since like, we were born. Well, that is until now....
I'm sitting here in Biology. Now, normally I love biology. I like studying all these organisms and taking samples and drawing conclusions. Yeah yeah, I'm like, this big science geek. I can't really help it. I suck at math.. which is like, weird. But I love Biology. I guess life just kinda fascinates me or something.
But for some reason today, I just like.. can't stop.. daydreaming.
And can you guess who I'm daydreaming about? Yeah, Maxwell Evans. He's like, all mysterious. And I can't help but wonder what it'd be like to kiss him. Maybe one da..
The bell rang, snapping Liz out of it. She picked up her books and left, only to be greeted at her locker by Alex and Maria.
"You know that chick Pam?" Maria asked.
"Pam Troy?" Alex confirmed.
"Yeah.. she's got three little studs in each ear, and she used to wear her eyeliner like catwoman" Maria did a little clawing motion with her hand and hissed. "But now, it's all smudged. And she has those like, perfect small feet."
"Yeah.... what about her?"
"Nothing. She just annoys me. She like, collagens her lips. It's sick, they're all puffy."
Maxwell walked by the three, and Liz finally joined the conversation.
"Really? You think she did? You think she collagened her lips? Really?"
Okay, so maybe that just made me sound really stupid... and with the looks that I'm getting from Alex and Maria.. I'm almost like, totally positive that it did.
"Chica, he's gone now. You can talk like a normal person again. You should really start progressing to the next phase."
"God, Maria, I don't want to look like I'm throwing myself at him or something."
"Liz, hon, people throwing themselves at people is like, the basis of civilization."
Liz looked to Alex.
"Hey, don't look at me. She does have a point."
Okay, this may sound weird. It's probably my like, hormones in high gear or something. But when Max Evans is around me, my whole body knows it. I get this like, tingly feeling, and my nerves get all riled up. I'll keep like, talking and stuff.. and totally not know what I'm talking about. I'm just wondering.. if there's a term for this.
The next day, when Liz approached her bio class she was only happy to find out that they were to be dissecting. As the groans of all the students filled the classroom, she smiled.
"We will be dissecting a pig's heart. You know the drill.. labs require hypothesis', which are.." The teacher waited for someone to answer the question.
Okay, so I know the answer and I enjoy cutting things up. That doesn't mean I'm willing to raise my hand and say the answer, that'll make me look like a complete..
"An eductated guess." Sean said happily.
While Liz was enjoying the thrills of biology, Maria found Maxwell at the school's vending machine. She smirked and walked up to him.
"Hey, Evans. So, Michael says you can get my girlfriend a fake ID."
"Yeah" Max started... "And so can Michael."
"Oh.. well see, it's like this. Michael just already does so much for me.. and umm. I don't want to like, ask him to do more.." She began, and decided to try a different tactic. "My girlfriend, Liz, you know.. she wants a fake ID. It's like, this big emergency."
"Okay.. well then.. why doesn't she.. ask for it herself?" Max looked at Maria, raising a brow questioningly.
Maria ignored his question and continued.
"Look, can you get the ID or not?"
"What kinda ID?"
Liz heard a slight tapping on the window barrier from the outside hallway, and glanced there only to find Maria. She motioned with the wave of her hand for Liz to come out. Liz looked around, and stepped out of the classroom. Sean and Isabel watched her retreating form leave the room. Isabel snickered quietly to herself.
"Sean, where's your partner?" Mr. Levits asked, as he walked around the room.
"Uh.. she um.. almost fainted so..."
"Oh, okay, and what's your extra credit project going to be on?"
"The uh, controlled release of energy. Construction and use of a velometer."
"Okay, did you work on it alone, or with Elizabeth?"
"Umm, with Liz." Sean answered.
The teacher smiled at Sean and then turned back to the front of the room.
Sean felt a tap on his back, and Isabel whispered sarcastically,
"Yeah, Liz really helped you on your project."
"Well... she's going to. Look, why would I make it up if it weren't true."
Isabel glanced him over once.
"I don't know.. the same reason you said she fainted. Look, she's just like, working off of you. She's expecting to get an A because you're smart. She's taking advantage of you and you're like, so letting her. I.. pity you."
Liz had just heard the knews from Maria and she was completely mortified.
"Oh my God, Maria."
"Hey, this is like.. a good thing." Alex interjected.
"I bet people can like, actually die from embarassment. It's probably medically a proven thing."
"Hey, you're getting a fake ID made my Maxwell Evans, the man of your dreams. You should be so thanking me right now."
"Let's just stop discussing this." Liz started. Then a half a minute later, she was asking again, "Okay, so.. how did he act. You know, was he like bored? Interested?.."
Maria was obviously annoyed with Liz's prodding,
"He sat down on the floor like a little puppy dog panting uncontrollably. Okay? And Alex over here had to hold down his tongue."
"Heh, and I wasn't even there." Alex joined in.
Liz rolled her eyes, but couldn't control the giddiness that was now starting to consume her body.
Okay, so that discussion. Like totally flew me up to cloud 9. I was completely happy until.. well, until Sean showed up.. and then I was stuck between people who knew me in completely different ways. I had the friends that knew the real me to my right.. Maria and Alex. And then I had the well... person that knew the childhood me to my left.
And the thing is, when you're stuck between people who know you in different ways. You have to like, come up with a combination you on the spot. It's like improv.
"Umm...so, Liz. Levits thinks we're uh, working on my volumeter together."
"And what is your name again?" Maria asked Sean.
Sean rolled his eyes at Maria and ignored her.
"I have the whole apparatus set up. But I don't think it's fair for me to do the whole expiriment. And you not to.."
"I never said I was going to do the experiment." Liz confirmed.
"Well, she's giving you credit. You won't have to do much.. just.. look, my parents are out of town and we could work on it.."
"She'll be there." Maria said.
Liz's eyes widened in shock.
"What?" Maria asked nonchalantly.
Liz shot her an evil glare.
"What, this is perfect."
"As a place to bring Maxwell Evans."
"Were you born in a satanic cult or something. Maxwell Evans at Sean Krackow's house is like.. against anything that's human."
Sean kind of stood there listening. So she liked Max. He should have known that. It's not like it mattered anyway, except that Max was so... kind of out of it.
"Look, are we going to do the project or what?" Sean was actually getting impatient.
"Uh, yes." Liz answered.
Sean started to walk away, and Alex stopped him.
"Woah.. this is like, so weird."
"What?" Sean asked.
Alex looked to Maria, then to Sean.. and then to Maria again.
"You two look like.. a lot alike. You could be like, cousins."
Maria and Sean looked at eachother disgustedly and then Sean left.
Okay, now I'm here in my room and Alex and Maria are going over the "plan" with me. Maria never ceases to amaze me with her schemes. She somehow thinks it'll like, work if she and Alex take Max to Sean's house with the fake ID. Personally...
"Maria. In my humble opinion..."
Okay, I get some of these phrases from my mom imprinted onto my brain. It's like, so not cool.
"I don't think it's going to work. I mean, he's Maxwell Evans. He's not going to want to show up and give me the ID."
In the kitchen, Nancy and Isabel's mom, Diane, were discussing their daughters' friendship.
"Where's Is?" Nancy asked.
"She refused to come inside. I guess her and Liz had some sort of falling out."
"You know, Liz never tells me anything. It's apparently "uncool" to be able to have conversations with your mother. In her eyes' that is." Nancy said. She sighed, "They're probably just in one of their arguments. I'm sure everything will be fine in a couple of days."
"Yeah, I think so too." Diane smiled.
Outside, Sean was riding on his bike passed The Crashdown, when he spotted Isabel. He couldn't help but explain to her that Liz wasn't just there to use him.
"You know, Liz is coming over tomorrow to work on the project."
"So?" Isabel asked, sounding like it didn't matter.
"So.. she's not using me. So.. that means you were wrong."
"Riigght. Keep telling yourself that Sean." Isabel responded bitterly.
Back upstairs Liz was freaking out about the whole Max ID thing.
"Okay, you think he's.. like"
"Liz, he is definitely semi-interested in you. I mean, it's not like you're his whole world or anything. He's got like other things on his mind. Like his car, and his guitar and stuff."
"Ugh. but that's what's not fair." Liz said in frustration. "How come I'm the one sitting around analyzing him to every microscopic detail and he gets to be the one with other things on his mind."
Then there was a momentary silence before Alex broke it with..
"Woah, that is deep."
Somehow, I managed to convince my mother to let me go to Sean's house on a school night. I think the only reason she let me go was because it was Sean. And he's like, this reliable person. After all, he is the all A, all honors, highest GPA student in the school.
The weird thing is that his house smells just like it did all those years ago when I used to actually come here. I don't know, it was kind of reassuring.. and annoying at the same time.
Liz glanced at Sean setting up the velometer.
Kind of like Sean himself.
After watching Sean work on the project for a while, Liz finally stated.
"Umm. Maria DeLuca and uh.. Alex Whitman might be coming over later. They need to give me something."
Sean looked at her. Kind of hurt,
"I knew you wouldn't be much help." He said in the Sean-like, bitterly sarcastic tone.
Maria and Alex walked into Sean's house and found them working.. or, Sean working on the project.
Maria looked at Sean,
"Umm, I know this is your house and everything.. but could you like, maybe just.. leave for a few minutes."
"Oh wow. At least you're admitting this is my house."
"Look, you don't have to leave the house or anything, just the room."
Liz looked at Sean pleadingly
"It'll only take a second." He nodded. "Thanks." She said and Sean left.
"Maria, this thing with Max is like an obsession. A like, dream. It's like.. you know, a fantasy. One that I think about all the time, and like, if you make it real.. it might ruin that. So, I just.. I want it to be a fantasy cuz like.. if it's real... it won't be the same. Do you see what I'm saying here?" Liz asked.
"Yeah, I agree." Alex said.
"Well, I completely disagree. Come on Liz, you want Max Evans. You want him bad, and you're just not admitting it."
Why is it that Maria tends to like, know how I really feel? It's kind of creepy. We've only been friends for a couple weeks and she seems to know me better than anyone else. So, I took her advice.. and I went outside to meet Max at his car.
"So, I umm.. have the money.. You know, for the ID." Liz said nervously.
"Yeah." Max responded, looking straight into her eyes.
Oh my God.. I think his eyes are one of the many reasons I fell for him. They're so.. amber.. and like, piercing. If I look really close, especially with the way the sun is reflecting off of those amber eyes, I think I can see these tiny flecks of gold in them... and..
"Get in the car." Max said.
"Umm.. I can't.. go anywhere." Liz said, immediately wishing she hadn't.
Max's eyes locked in on hers again.
"I didn't say go anywhere."
You know how I thought I was on cloud 9 before. Well, nothing compares to this. It's like.. things are going the way I want them to. For once in my life, I feel like I have like, purpose. Or something. It's just, things are going exactly the way I want them to, and I can feel something happening..
Max went through his glove compartment and pulled out her fake ID, handing it to her.
"Wow, it looks real.. but wh.."
Max leaned over towards her and brushed his lips against hers. She blinked her eyes shut, and was so surprised that she pulled away.
"Sorry.. it's just that I was.. ta"
He kissed her again, and this time she kissed him back. He licked her lips with his tongue, asking for entry. She opened her mouth, and their tongues collided. It was gentle, and for a brief second, Liz thought she saw stars. That is, until Max pulled away.
"This whole day has been one long thing that makes no sense." Max said.
We were both silent after that. And then, everything just kind of went in slow motion. It seemed so perfect. I could feel the sleeve of his shirt brushing against my arm, and I was focusing my eyes on the colar of his shirt. And when I finally looked up back into his amber eyes, the moment was just.. there. It was the perfect time for him to kiss me. Again. And I was prepared. I was ready for it..
Max leaned forward, and Liz closed her eyes. Then she snapped them open as she heard the click of the door opening.
"Umm.. I.. gotta go. See ya later." He said, as he pushed the passenger door open.
I could have killed him at that moment.
Liz walked back inside Sean's house, just as Sean was walking out. He spotted Max's car in the driveway and leaned down to pick up Liz's ID.
"Uh.. hey. Where's uh... Is Michael here?" Max asked.
"Michael? Why would Michael be here?" Sean asked.
"Maria told me.. nevermind. Why are you here?"
"I live here."
"Oh," Max nodded. "Well just, just make sure Liz gets that." He gestured towards the ID. "Okay?"
I felt kind of bad about not doing the project. Sean really did it all. So I went to his kitchen and started washing the dishes. Hey, I had to do something.. and besides, I needed to get my mind off of Max.
Sean walked into the kitchen and appraoched Liz. She finished doing the dishes, and put on her coat.
"Look, I won't take the extra credit. Okay?"
"Whatever. Here.." Sean gave her the ID.
Liz silently took it and left.
So I went home and I saw my father. He started babbling about something, and I felt really bad.
"Dad, I really don't feel like talking. No offence."
"You want me to warm up some spaghettie, Liz?"
My dad seems to know how to cheer me up. And for some reason, whenever my father warms something up, it tastes better than when anybody else does.
"So, how did that experiment go with Sean?"
"He did most of the work."
"So was it like.. a date?"
"Dad, people don't just.. it wasn't like.. you know, people can hang out."
"Oh.." Jeff said. "So, was anyone else there that you like?"
It's stange how parents suddenly turn phsychic out of nowhere. It's like, unnerving.
"It's okay to like someone." Jeff started, "It's just boys your age can sometimes.."
"Dad" Liz gave him a stern look, "I know."
And then there was that silence. That uncomfortable silence when you are like, totally embarassed and you don't know what to say. But that was soon broken by my dad.
"Liz, you're waitressing tomorrow."
"Daaad!" I pleaded.
"Liz, Fridays are always busy, and tourist season is coming up." He smiled, and ruffled her hair before retreating upstairs.
He ruffled my hair. He ruffled my brown hair with Crimson Glow streaks in it. That's what he did when I was a kid. Before my breasts came between us and everything. I should probably have been pissed off by it, because I'm not a kid anymore, I'm 16 years old. But it was my dad. And we sort of.. bonded. So, I wasn't pissed... But I still don't want to have to work tomorrow...
Liz rolled her eyes before going upstairs to bed.
*There is a reason why Max is sort of like being an evil male in this... lol, yes, there is a method to my madness*
|posted on 18-May-2002 9:01:22 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|JaneLane, m14, Rapunzel (Congrats on getting to a comp. Lol), roswellluver, abbs007, Cinder, frenchkiss70, mpls muse, just me, katalina, and TD DreamerBehr~ Thank you all for the FB. =)|
Kitcat26~ Lol. I get weird phrases from my mom too. It's crazy. And I swear the show epitomizes the teenage use of the word "like". As for the fake I.D., that was more of like, an excuse for Maria to get Max and Liz together. =)
LixMix5~ The plot shall begin to thicken on Max's evilness towars Liz. Thanks for trusting me though. Hehe.
Meagzie~ Aww. You're so sweet. I haven't been able to see the final ep yet. It wasn't on at the regularly scheduled time cuz of a stupid b-ball game.. and I'm not sure when it will be aired or if it already has been. =/ I shall be pissed if I missed it. Anyway, I found it funny when I reread Max opening the car door on Liz too, so no, it's not bad that you did too. Lol. Thanks for the FB.
BronWen~ Good insight on Is's being a bitch. And I love Maria too. Hehe.
Lizzie_Parker17~ Thanks for the comment and all those bumps. Lol, sorry it took me so long. =/ This is for you... Lol
*I put more of a Roswellian-vibe in it.. I hope it still seems MSCL-ish too. We'll see..*
Liz stood by her locker in the hallway looking over Isabel. Her former best friend had been changing.. physically. Her chest was bigger, her skin had a perfect complexion and holding onto her hand was Kyle, the football superstar. Isabel had everything going for her. A beautiful, naturally developing body and a stable boyfriend.
Liz brought her hand up to the side of her face where a small zit was forming. She sighed.
Isabel's life was developing in this.. like, natural healthy way, while mine was like.. clogged.
Maria came up behind Liz, and noticed her looking at the newly found couple.
"Yep..Isabel and Kyle are together. Did you not know? I think they met at the game, or something."
Liz looked back at Isabel in envy.
"Yeah, I guess so."
Maria studied Liz's expression for a minute,
"Okay, chica, what's wrong?" She asked, looking her straight in the eyes.
"Nothing, Maria." Maria looked at Liz warily,
"Come on Liz, you have that look. That gloomy, 'I hate life' look. Now you're going to tell Maria what's wrong or I am going to have to force it out of you."
"Really Maria, nothing. I just have to waitress tonight." She rolled her eyes. "A great waste of a friday night."
"Well... I wouldn't mind waitressing.. if I get good tips." She winked.
Liz looked at Maria thankfully,
"Sure, why not?"
"Thank you so much Maria."
"Don't mention it. I think Michael's going to be practicing with the band anyway."
Maria really shouldn't have mentioned Michael... Michael being in the Frozen Embryos only made me think of Max.. and when I start thinking of Max... I get all depressed again. This like, crush, is seriously killing me.
"Come on, Liz." Maria said, tugging at her sleeve,
"Where are we going?"
"Do you even have to ask?"
Once the two girls made their way in the bathroom, Alex was already in there.
"I've always spent my time in the girls' bathroom bonding with you guys. But seriously, people are so getting the wrong idea." Alex stated.
Maria scrounged around her purse, looking for her lipstick,
"Ashley Moronico asked me if you were getting a sex change operation yesterday." Maria said casually.
"You see, that's the thing. I don't want to get a sex change or anything, I just like hanging out with girls. This is totally getting out of hand, and I'm left with only one thing to do.." Alex said before sadly saying goodbye... "Goodbye leaky faucet, goodbye soap dispenser that never works, goodbye..womens' bathroom." He grabbed Liz and spun her around, "I think I shall miss you most of all."
Liz laughed. Alex could always make her laugh. And the combination of both Alex and Maria was insane.
"Hey," Maria exclaimed as she spotted a note being tucked underneath the bathroom door. She scurried towards it and picked it up, reading it.
"Ha ha.. Junior Girls.. the top 40 list." Maria read aloud.
Liz and Alex crowded around her to look at the list.
Okay, so as my eyes scanned through that paper I noticed two things. One was that Maria DeLuca was voted "most slut potential". The other was that Isabel was voted "Best hooters".
Maria laughed. "Look, I'm on it. "Most Slut Potential", don't you just love it?" She continued laughing as she exited the bathroom.
"Don't worry, Liz, you're not on it." Alex tried comforting her.
"I don't care if I'm on it or not.."
"No, what I mean is.. you're not noticed.. you blend it."
Liz shot him a glare
Thank you Alex, that really helps boost up my confidence.
"I mean.. unlike me, who basically never will."
Maria walked back in, applying her lipstick on, licking her lips, and making kissy faces in the mirror.
"Potential slut," Maria giggled, "Now where do people get that kind of idea about me?"
"Research" Alex said blatantly.
The two friends laughed.
I guess I can't really see how this would make Maria laugh. If I were on that list, and especially if I were on it for the same reasons that Maria is.. I'd be totally pissed. I'd be like, wanting to kill whoever made that list.
"I can so not even say what this is. Are you saying this doesn't make you mad, Maria?"
"Hey, it's my life. I don't take it seriously anyway, it's just a joke."
Liz looked at Maria in concern.
"I don't want them saying that about you."
Maria rolled her eyes,
"Or maybe about you, cuz we're friends, ya know." She said before leaving.
I felt like a really horrible person, because part of that was true.
Throughout the hallways, the list spread, and by the end of the school day, all the guys were talking about the infamous list. Liz stood at her locker, listening to the crude comments of her so-called classmates. Her eyes spotted Isabel again, and she wondered if Isabel knew she was on that list.
Liz glanced down at her own slighty developed chest.
Why can't you two just grow? I guess I should be thanking my mother in passing down her flat genes to me.
Liz spotted Maria swarmed by a flock of horny guys. Freshmen, Juniors and even Seniors. Maria seemed to be handling it well though, as Liz noticed Maria flick them all off and walk away. Liz smiled, laughing at her friend.
You just gotta love Maria. And the more I think about it, the worse I feel about worrying about my reputation. I shouldn't care, just like Maria doesn't care about hers. But I don't think I'm confident enough like Maria is. She is like, so much of what I'm not... like Isabel is so..
Liz glanced over Isabel again.
...Perfect. And I'm not.
On the busride home, Sean sat by Liz.
"We got full credit on the extra credit." He said.
"Sean, I told you I wasn't going to take the extra credit." Liz rolled her eyes.
"Yeah, well... you still worked on it."
"No, I didn't, Sean."
"But you were there. So you deserve some of it."
Liz looked at Sean,
"Thanks", she said more annoyed than thankful.
All the while Isabel sat behind them and when their bus stop came, Liz hurried to her home in an effort to avoid Sean. Isabel walked up to Sean, smiling.
"So that's why you let her use you."
"What?" Sean asked, looking around nonchalantly.
"Ugh. You are totally in love with her." Isabel confirmed.
"Umm.. no, I'm not."
Isabel shot him a knowing look.
"She put red streaks in her hair and she's turning into a bitch." Sean said.
Isabel laughed in his face.
"Duh squared, Krackow."
"Look, I don't like her, okay?" Sean fumbled.
"Sure." Is said as she walked to her house.
Sean is seriously messed up. He's always showing up at my house, and I see Tess run up to the doorway to answer the door. This is like, totally fine by me and yet, completely bizarre. My little sister has a crush on a guy, and she seems to be like, progressing even more than I am in the boyfriend field. I swear, I am like, seriously pathetic. Max kisses me and I completely lose all sense of myself. I need help. Somebody. Shoot. Me.
Liz sat on the couch, thinking these thoughts as she watched tv. Her father came into the living room from The Crashdown kitchen.
"Elizabeth.. get changed. Time for work."
"Please dad." Liz stood up, pleading with him not to go to work.
"Liz." Jeff said, fixing her a stern look.
Uh oh, he's giving me the look. That 'No matter what you say, you're not getting out of it' look. My life is such a bundle of joy.
Liz changed, putting her green dress on and cheap antennas.
No wonder my dad gets along with Sean so well. They're, like, both complete science fiction geeks. My dad has all the movies of Star Wars on DVD, and what's really pathetic, is that he and Sean have actually traded episodes of Star Trek. I shudder at the thought. I am like, so surrounded by geeks.
"Liz?" Tess asked, as she opened Liz's bedroom door, and peaked inside.
Liz threw a shoe at Tess, but Tess was too quick, closing the door before it hit her.
Yes, I just love my sister to death.
"Knock before you barge in like that." Liz shouted.
"Come in." Liz said.
"Liz, can I borrow some clothes?"
"Why?" Liz said, as she proceeded to fix her drooping antennas.
"Why would you want my clothes for Hallow.."
"Elizabeth! Get in here now." Jeff yelled.
"Ugh, sure, go ahead, Tess. I better be getting them back though." Liz said. "And do not go snooping around my room, or else I swear to God, you are so going to die."
Tess nodded, and Liz rushed downstairs to The Crashdown.
She grabbed her notepad and pen, and made her way over to the tables her father assigned her, not really paying attention to the customers seated. This was routine, and she could work with her eyes closed if she wanted to.
"Hi, I'm Liz, I'll be your server today..."
Server... hmm, that sounds kind of.. perverted if you think about it. I mean, it makes me feel like I'm some sex slave ready to serve my master... okay, I need to stop like, thinking so much. Especially in terms of sex.
"Can I start you off with something to drink?" Liz finished.
"I'll have a cherry coke." Came a deep, familar voice.
Liz looked to find that she was serving Maxwell Evans. He was sitting with some other grungy looking guy with semi-long light brown hair.
Okay, now I don't mind calling myself a server... bad thoughts, Liz, bad. Must.. concentrate.. on words.. not lips..
Liz tore her gaze away from Max's lips, and heard the grungy dude order the same thing.
"Give me some tabasco sauce too." He said.
Liz went to get their drinks, and when she returned to their booth she found Maria sitting by the grungy guy. She put two and two together and guessed the grungy guy was Michael.
"Two cherry cokes.." Liz began, and set down the bottle of tabasco sauce.. "And tabasco sauce."
"Hey, chica." Maria stated, shooting up. "Just show me my uniform and tell me what I gotta do and I'll do it." She said cheerfully.
Liz pulled Maria to the back room.
"Maria, I thought you weren't going to come."
"Why, did you think I was like, going to blow you off or something? I'm a loyal friend, Lizzie."
"Thank God... So, was that guy with Max Michael?" Liz asked.
"Yep. Hot, ain't he?"
"I guess." Liz said.
"Oh my God, chica. My dream has come true. I am going to be singing with the Frozen Embryos. Michael is letting me sing! Isn't that great?"
"Wow, that's so great." Liz said, enthusiastically. "I'm really happy for you."
It is great. I'm glad for Maria. I am seriously happy for her.
"And you know what this means?" Maria continued.
"What?" Liz laughed.
"You get to spend more time with Max Evans." She winked.
"Maria, Max is like, such a jerk right now. I am so over him."
"No you're not, Liz." Maria confirmed.
Yep, Maria definitely knows me more than I know myself.
Just then Alex walked into the backroom with a white apron on.
"I'm ready to cook, Liz!" He sang out happily.
"You guys are great." Liz smiled at them. Maria and Alex just hugged her and she explained what they'd be doing. "You two are so saving my life."
"We know." Alex smiled.
Now if only Max wasn't such an asshole, I'd be able to like, have a semi-wonderful life. Okay, maybe it'd just be more normal. Like a normal 17 year old girls life. I need to stop over-analyzing everything. I swear, it's like, bad for my health.. and my mental stability.
When Liz returned to Max and Michael's booth, handing them their food she noticed Max wouldn't look at her. He was looking everywhere but at her.
I can not believe how I'm reacting to Max. I like, notice everything he does and try to decipher why he's doing it. When it comes to Maxwell Evans, I'm always thinking 'why' with him. I know he's had other girls before... Maria told me.
"Maria, that Courtney girl Max was with.." Liz began.
"Omg, that was like so last year. She spreads the fact that they did it all around school, she said he was great in the sack though. That's always a plus." Maria said.
I can completely understand that he's had sex before. What I don't understand is why he won't even kiss me. I mean, he kissed me that one time.. but after he practically shoved me out of his car. Am I like, THAT repulsive that I turn guys OFF.
Liz glanced at Maria's ease of flirting with guys and gaining great tips.
Or maybe, I like, take things in too deeply. Maybe I should be like, more free, like Maria. She's a free spirit, and guys love her. But I'm not like that. God, I'm a hopeless romantic.
Throughout the rest of the night, Liz, Maria and Alex worked. Liz tried her hardest to ignore Max and Michael. She figured they were staying for Maria to practice with the band when she was done working.
"Liz, hon. Max is totally checking you out."
Liz craned her neck to the side casually,
"No! Don't look at him, that'll make it obvious."
"Okay, then what's he doing. Like, how is he looking at me?"
"He's looking at you like he's trying to undress you with his eyes." Maria waggled her eyebrows.
"Maria!" I roll my eyes, and walk into the backroom again.
I swear to God, Maria is like, so evil.
Liz heard the voice, and slowly turned around, trying to look pissed off. But behind the coldness on her expression, Max could see the hurt in her eyes.
"Are you going to stand there, or say something?" Liz asked.
Wow, I can actually talk to him. And seem totally uninterested. Sound the bells, it's a miracle. I am NOT obsessed with Maxwell Evans.
Max walked up closer to Liz, and she could feel her heart pounding.
"Liz, I.." His amber eyes were staring into hers.
"You know, Maxwell. That's the most you've ever spoken to me. Is that the reason you stopped kissing me? Because you expect a relationship with just sex and you know that I won't give it out? Huh?"
God, what am I saying? These words are just coming out of my mouth in this like, rush of adrenaline. I mean, it feels good now. Incredible, in fact, but this is not stopping my heart from beating rapidly. Actually, I think it just like, increased tenfold.
Max's eyes darkened, and he pulled her arm to him and attacked her lips with intensity. Liz complied, parting her mouth, and Max drove his tongue in to dance wildy with hers. As their passion grew, Max's lips wandered down to seize Liz's neck, licking and sucking gently.
Wow, it's happening again. I thought I was dreaming last time when I saw stars.. but now.. now I'm seeing other things...
Max pulled away quickly again, and Liz looked at him questioningly.
"What was that?" She asked.
"What was what?"
"I saw.. things."
Max gave her this weird look.
"You know, Liz, you're right. I can't have a full relationship with you." He said, before leaving out the backroom door and out of the restaurant.
And for the second time I could have killed him. Why do I torture myself with this like, insane lust over him?
|posted on 26-May-2002 12:44:36 PM by Wench On A Leash|
Rapunzel, LilEvEe, abbs007, JaneLane, Cinder, Roxygurl182, tazno, TD DreamerBehr, mpls muse, anonymousarfan~ Thanks for all the FB. =)
Kitcat26~ I love Alex and Maria too, I'm surprised with how well they fit the Rayanne and Rickie characters from MSCL. Craziness. Hehe, server thing.. we must have some weird psychic connection. Lol. Unless it's a Michigan thing. Good theories on Max.
Meagzie~ Lol. I love you! You're fun, Meagzie. Thanks for the FB.
m14~ Lol. His name was Tino. Hmmm, although I do love the name Trent... Trent from Daria... Trent Reznor from NIN.. hehe..
If I forgot anybody, sorry. >_<
OKay, ummm.. the next part is kind of long and there's not much M/L in it.. so sorry. But believe me in the chapter after this.. there will be.. and you shall find out more about Max.. mwah haha. >=D But I remember this episode and it really touched me so I had to use it with these Roswellians. I dunno.. I hope you enjoyo it.. and I'm sorry if it doesn't seem so consistent with the previous chapter.. I dunno, I don't know if I'm exactly happy with how it turned out.. but I dunno, I worked a lot on it.. and it's yeah, long.. and now I'm rambling so I'll shut up and post it.
And all those poems in it are JK's..he wrote the eppy, and I looked up the poems. Hehe.
Liz busied herself with working the rest of the weekend. She figured that having something to occupy her time woud get her mind off of... things. Off of Isabel, off of her annoying little sister, off of her parents, off of Maxwell Evans. Basically off of life and the never-ending thoughts that constantly consumed her brain until they drove her crazy. That theory proved wrong.
For some reason, I find myself thinking about all my friends. All the friendships I've had. It kind of amazes me to think that my mom has actually had the same best friend for like, practically all her life. Me and Isabel are so completely different now. It's kind of scary. But at the same time, freeing. I have Maria and Alex now, and I don't feel so alienated, like I have to try and be someone I'm not. I guess.. I'm just trying to discover who I am.
Geez, how can I manage to think all of these things while I'm supposed to be listening to people's orders. Maybe I'm like, multi-talented in this. Maybe I think about things so much that I developed a kind of a sixth sense to not screwing up an order when hardly even paying attention to the customers. I just smile and nod and play 'Good little Hostess Parker'.
Liz sighed as the last customer finished his cup of coffee and left. She went to the door to reverse the sign and signify The Crashdown being closed for the night when Maria burst in out of nowhere.
"Oh my God, Liz! I'm going to actually be singing for them, like it's a for sure thing.. and you, you my chica are going to be watching me as I make my debut on stage." Maria winked. She hugged Liz before proceeding to dance happily around the restaurant.
Wow, Maria.. is like, actually giddy. I have never seen her this happy before. I don't think I'VE ever even been this happy before.
"So.. when will you be performing.." Liz asked.
Performing... performing, performing...sexual things.... Oh no, it's happening again... I get one word stuck in my mind, and it keeps repeating over and over again like a mantra, or something. And I thought the serving thing was bad.
"Earth to Liz." Maria sang out, waving her hands in front of Liz's trance- enduced face.
"What?" Liz asked, snapping out of her thoughts.
"I said we're performing in two weeks on Saturday night, and since you have a fake ID, you can get in." Maria grinned the ever-famous 'Maria has a scheme' grin. When Liz gave her a questioning look, Maria feigned innocence,
"Maria." Liz turned her look of question into a pleading look and Maria noticed for the thousandth time how innocent Liz really was.
"Okay, chica. But honey, Max is a boy, and boys are stupid. It's like, in their genes. They were totally created with a dense chromosome." Maria took a bite of a strawberry, "Basically.. what I'm trying to say is.. just don't expect so much from guys. They'll never live up to your standards, so just go with things."
"Just go with things, Maria?" Liz asked.
I wonder if that would entitle me to sleep with Max Evans... although that seems very tempting.. Max Evans, in bed, with me. Caressing my skin, telling me I'm beautiful, telling me he loves me.. I would enjoy that...
Maria cleared her throat when she saw the dreamy, glazed look in Liz's doe eyes.
"Liz, I think your problem is that you, my dear, are in love with the idea of love."
"God, Maria. I'm helpless." Liz whined and Maria hugged her comfortingly.
"Aww, don't worry, babe. But please, at least be there to watch me sing."
"Maria, I wouldn't miss you singing for the world." Liz smiled.
"Great!" Maria said as she stormed out of the restaurant. "I'm off to tell Alex."
Liz finally closed the restaurant and then retreated to her room.
Mondays suck. School is boring, and teachers are like, all the same.
Liz was at her locker getting her books for English class when Alex came up to her.
"Hey girlfriend." He smiled.
"Hey Alex. Did you hear the good news?"
"Yeah, of course I did. Maria is like, so happy right now." Alex said, flailing his arms around to exaggerate his opinion. A group of students walked by, the guys snickering at Alex.
"Fag.." One guy remarked, shaking his head and continuing walking as the girls in the group started whispering and soon everyone glanced to Alex.
Liz noticed Alex's hurt expression flash by quickly, and she patted his shoulder in an attempt to soothe him.
I cannot believe people. God, people piss me off so much. How can they, just be so... heartless and inconsiderate.
"Hey, don't listen to them Alex. They don't even know you." Liz smiled lightly. Maria joined the group,
"Nothing." Alex said, looking down. Maria looked to Liz, silently mouthing
'What happened?' Liz nodded towards the group of students walking passed them.
"I'll be right back." Maria said before quickly walking over to the group. "Wow, do you guys have absolutely nothing better to do than spread gossip about people you know nothing about? You really must have no lives." Maria rolled her eyes. She had this way of making people feel really intimidated. She didn't have to say much, her presence and the serious look on her face just made them shut up. Nobody crossed Maria, at least, not to her face.
The group fell silent, and Maria slowly looked each and every one of them over.
"It's people like you that make me hate the human race." She said before turning around and going back to Alex and Liz.
Wow. Again, I wish that I was more like Maria. She knows how to stand up to people. And the expression on Alex's face... I think they look out for eachother. That one night, when Maria got drunk, Alex was there for her, making sure she was okay... and now, there's Maria. Making sure that Alex is okay. I can't help but smile myself at this friendship between them. It's almost like a family.
The bell rang, and the three went their separate ways. Liz made her way to her English class and silently took her seat, avoiding looking at a certain Maxwell Evans sitting in the very back of the classroom who was currently sleeping. She glanced around, looking for the substitute to fill in for Miss Mayhem while she was off on pregnancy leave. One of the students, Nick, got up and put a CD in the class computer, blasting Nirvana throughout the classroom. Liz sighed, glanced around again, noticing Sean reading a book and Isabel getting her hair done by the girl behind her. As the class got louder, Liz rested her head on her desk.
God, kill me now. Please.
Suddenly, the class got quiet and Liz looked up to the front of the room. A younger man was sitting on the desk with a toothpick in his mouth.
"Oh, sorry. Would anybody else like a toothpick?" He asked the class.
The students all gave eachother weird, questioning looks.
"Is this guy for real?" One asked.
"Are you the substitute?" Another asked.
"Yes. I am the new substitute, and the only reason I'm here.. truthfully, is to get paid." The class looked at the teacher in awe before he continued, "So... who's going to remain here, and who's going to leave?" The teacher looked at everyone in the class.
"You're telling us we can leave?" Isabel asked.
"Hey, it's your decision. I'm just the substitute. It depends on whether you're willing to learn or not."
"What's the catch?" Max asked. Everyone looked to the back of the room, surprised that Maxwell Evans actually spoke.
"There's no catch. If you don't want to be here, there's no way I can force you to stay." The teacher simply said.
"See ya." Max said, getting up, ready to leave.
"Well.. there's just.. one, simple thing. We'll be discussing you when you're gone. Unless you don't mind that, then there's no catch."
"Yeah right." Max said, shaking his head.
"No.. it's true. Nothing's planned, so it would be something to help pass the time."
Max turned around and made his way silenty back to his seat.
"So.. um, what are we supposed to do the next 47 minutes of class?" Liz finally spoke up. Sean raised his hand, and the teacher looked at him.
"Umm, one of the things we were supposed to do this semester.. was for each of our works to be published in the school's newspaper. But our umm, our teacher, never read over them and approved them, so it, like, never happened." Sean said awkwardly.
"Well, that's a heartbreaking tale." The teacher said. The class burst into laughter, and Sean spoke louder,
"Well umm. How about you, you know, maybe just look through those papers in that file cabinet right over there, cuz, that's where they are.. so that we all get credit for at least writing it."
The teacher shrugged.
"Sure, why not?"
"One question." Isabel said. "What's your name?"
"Vic." The class looked at him.
"Just Vic?" Is asked. He nodded before propping his feet up on the desk and beginning to read the papers.
"I'll have these all read by tomorrow class, so find something productive to do for the remainder of the period."
Okay, this monday seems to be interesting. First Maria tells off a bunch of morons, and then we get this like, different substitute. He kind of livens things up a bit. It's weird. When we were in the class room, I noticed that he had two different colored socks on. One was black, and the other was white. I wonder, if that like, means anything. Maybe he's just a weird guy. Or maybe he's actually, trying to tell us something. Whatever it is, it's interesting. I think I have something to look forward to tomorrow.
The rest of the school day, word of the new subsitute for Miss Mayhem spread around school, and Maria came up to Liz.
"Who is this Vic guy?"
"He's like, this weird sub. He pretty much let us do whatever we wanted to do for the whole period.. but he like, wasn't one of those stupid teachers that let the class walk all over him. It was just.. different."
"Yeah, Vic. I've been hearing all this stuff about him too." Alex chimed in. "I don't see what the big deal is. He's just a sub."
Liz just shrugged.
The next day, Liz made her way to English class wondering what Vic had to say about her writing. She spent a lot of time working on this poem that her mother absolutely loved. She worked really hard on it, and wanted to get feedback for her work. She took her regular seat, and waited patiently for Vic to show up. Once he made his way to the classroom, he sat on top of the teacher's desk and the first words to leave his mouth were..
"Well, I've read your entries.. and how shall I put this? The first thought I had was.. boring. They were fake, false, synthetic... what do these words have in common?" He pointed to Max, "You."
"Me?" Max asked.
"Yes you. Now what do these words have in common?"
"I don't know." Max said, just staring up at the front of the classroom. Vic's tone of voice became stronger, more powerful and forceful.
"Yes.. You.. Do." Vic said pronounciating each word. He got off his desk and made his way back towards Max. "What are these words.. they're not verbs, not nouns... but.."
"Um.. Ah, adjectives?" Max asked.
"Are you asking me or telling me."
"See, I knew you knew it. Don't play dumb with me again." He walked back around the room, passing through each of the rows before making his way back to the desk and grabbing all the papers. "How shall I phrase this?" He said, walking towards the window, and opening it. "This is the most God awful crap I have ever read in my life." He said before throwing the papers out.
"I can't believe this guy." Sean said under his breath.
The class fell silent, not knowing what to say, and not understanding why Vic had just thrown all their papers out the window.
I just don't get this. I worked hard on that paper. I spent time working on that paper. I love writing, I just.. I was told it was good. My mom said it was good, my dad even said it was good. How could he just throw it out the window like that?
That night when Liz was in the kitchen helping her mom with the dishes, the doorbell rang.
"I'll get it." Tess yelled.
"Hi," Sean said before stepping inside.
"Hi Sean." Tess smiled, looking up at him happily as Jeff walked in.
"Tess, leave him alone. Come in Sean." Jeff said, patting him on the back. Nancy made her way in the room, smiling once she saw Sean.
"Liz, honey, Sean's here." Nancy noticed a sheet of paper in Sean's hand. She gestured towards it and asked what it was.
"Oh, this is just a paper of Liz's that I found." Nancy took the paper from him,
"Oh, her Oak Tree poem. I love this poem.. but, why does it have this... mud all over it? Weren't we supposed to get it published? And where are all the other entries?"
"Oh, Liz didn't tell you?" Sean began, "He threw them out the window."
"Who?" Jeff asked.
"The substitute teacher who is like, mentally ill."
Liz made her way down the stairs rolling her eyes.
"He's not mentally ill."
"He threw them out the window?" Nancy asked. "That's terrible."
"Mom." Liz tried to halt her from speaking.
"No. Liz, you put a lot of hard work and thought into that poem." Jeff nodded,
"Yeah, you did."
"I don't know... you know, I don't really like it that much." Liz confirmed.
"Well, that's not the point." Jeff said, "He's a teacher, he can't just throw a paper out the window. That's rude."
"Liz, haven't we always told you to stand up for your rights?" Nancy chimed in.
Liz looked at Sean.
"Thanks, Sean." She said sarcastically.
The next day, at the end of the English class, Liz sat down in her seat watching everyone leave. As Max passed by, Vic halted him.
"I can understand you're not into class discussion. But, I need you to talk more, okay?" Vic said.
"Okay, just.." Max said, before glancing around the room. "Just, ok."
"By the way, Max. You left this behind." Vic said, handing him a book.
"No, I didn't."
"Just take it, we'll discuss it tomorrow."
Once Max left, Vic noticed Liz still sitting in her seat.
"Go on, say it."
"I just think that what you did yesterday, with the papers, just wasn't right. It didn't show respect." She stood up, getting ready to leave. "I mean, that Oak Tree poem, that was mine and I put a lot of thought into it."
"Ah...did you?" Vic asked. Liz just looked at him blankly.
"Why did you do it?"
"Hmm, good question. I did it to clear the slate. I did it to wake you up, so you could find yourself. And here you are, wide awake. That poem was yesterday, you wrote that yesterday.. what are you going to write today?"
I still have no idea what Vic was talking about. I was still kind of irked about it. It was like he was messing with my mind, actually forcing me to think about things. Forcing me to wake up.
"This Vic guy, I've got to meet him." Maria said. "All this talk about him, throwing papers out the window, I have to see what he's like."
"Then come to class with me tomorrow." Liz suggested.
"Okay, then." Maria smiled.
On thursday, the English class was full of people who weren't regularly there. Maria sat behind Liz and Vic walked in, suddenly taking the role of a teacher.
"Get out your notebooks."
"Substitute, my ass." Maria whispered to Liz, "This guy is the real deal, hon."
"I want everyone to start over, from the beginning." The class groaned,
"Come on, man. Can't you show us a movie or something?" A student asked.
Vic shook his head,
"Don't give me that. I don't want to see any domesticated animals or.." He looked at Liz, "greenery. I want reality, I want anger, I want honesty, I want nakedness."
"I'm right here." Maria smirked, whispering to Liz.
"Umm, excuse me.." Sean said, raising his hand. "May I say something?"
"Nope." Vic said, "Write it down. Whatever you feel like saying, write it down. What you never told anyone, not even yourself. Just write it down, and don't fear exposure. This will be completely anonymous, no one write their name down."
Maria giggled and whispered to Liz,
"Just how I like sex." She waggled her eyebrows. The class began writing, with the exception of Maria. Vic looked at her,
"What about you?"
"Oh, I'm not in this class."
"Really?" Vic said, looking at her. "You're not? I see you in front of me. Get out your notebook and write."
"I've never written anything for Lit class." She rolled her eyes.
"Well, looks like you have an unfair advantage." Vic smiled.
The word of Vic spread around the school even more, throughout the halls everyone heard of the infamous "Vic". The substitute of all substitutes. Maria spotted Alex and ran up to him excitedly.
"Tell him about the socks, Liz, tell him."
"He always wears one white sock and one.."
"Black." Maria finished.
"I have GOT to see the socks." Alex said.
This is so weird. I'm now sitting in my English class. With Alex and Maria both in here, who aren't even in this class. There must be something in the water.
Liz looked up towards Vic, who was handing out various papers to each of the students.
Or maybe it's just him.
"We'll start now, everyone read the paper I gave you out loud." He said. Isabel was the first to read one..
"In the fitting room, price tags tickle my shoulder. I slip the dress on.. I know this one will fit. I feel free." She sat back down, and Nick stood up next, reading,
"No one knows I come out here at night. I look up at your window, but you're never there."
"Liz." Maria whispered, tapping her shoulder. Liz ignored her, and continued listening to the poem,
"Only your horrible dog who bites..."
"Liz, he changed the socks." Maria whispered.
"Shut up, I'm trying to listen." Liz said.
Nick continued reading
"I realize that I'm not angry at you, because things change." The class perked up as they all listened to these poems. Alex picked out the next one and began,
"Umm, this one has a title. It's called 'A Fable'." Liz immediately stiffened. "Once upon a time there lived a girl. She slept in a lovely little cottage made of gingerbread and candy. She was always asleep. One morning she woke up, and the candy had mold on it. Her father blew her a kiss and the house fell down. She realized she was lost. She found herself walking down a crowded street. But the people were made of paper. Like paper dolls. She blew everyone a kiss good bye and watched as they blew away." The class began laughing, and Vic spoke up.
"What are you laughing about?"
"It doesn't make any sense." One student voiced.
"Well um.. yes, that's true. But, it does something better than make sense. It makes you feel. It makes you.." He looked at Liz, "Wake up." Liz smiled. "Okay, has everyone read? Sean, I think you're next."
"Umm. I'm not reading this." He said embarrased.
"Come on, just read it."
"Look, I don't feel comfortable..."
"Read it." Vic practically yelled in annoyance.
Sean stood up.
"This has a title too. It's called 'Haiku for Him'." He cleared his throat nervously before beginning, "He peels off my clothes like a starving man would peel an orange. His lips taste my ju.. juicy.." The class errupted into laughter. "I'm not reading this." Sean said, blushing profusely. Vic took the paper from him and continued.
"His lips taste my juicy sweetness. My legs tangle with his, we become one being. A burning furnace in the cold cement basement of love." He finished, looking to the class, "Hormones. What would we do without them?"
Hormones... hormones... hormones... serving.. performing sexual services... hormones.
"Okay, is this a real haiku?" He looked to the back of the room, "Max?"
"I don't know."
"Yeah, well find out." Vic picked up a dictionary and handed it to Max. "Now. Look up haiku." Max hesitantly flipped through the pages and Maria raised her hand.
"Well, just cuz it's not a real haiku doesn't mean you won't print it in the paper, right? I mean, it's real.. in.. in like, the sense that it's true to life."
"You're going to print that in the paper?" Sean asked, wide-eyed.
"I don't see why not."
The bell rang, and everyone handed back the papers before leaving. Liz walked up behind Vic and said
"That was mine. Not the haiku one."
Vic looked kind of distracted.
"Yeah, yeah, I know which one was yours." He said, preoccupied. He looked to Max, "Max, come here. I'm not finished with you yet." Liz glanced at Max, and then back to Vic before leaving the room.
Something must be up with Max. I wonder what it is.. God, I'm doing it again, I'm obsessing over him. My curiousity is killing me. I haven't even talked to him since.. since whatever happened between us Friday night.
Vic and Max sat alone at the end of the school day. Vic was watching as Max looked down at an open dictionary.
"What's that word?" Vic asked. Max swallowed, fixing a steady gaze out the window. "No, don't look out the window. What is the word?"
Just then the door creaked open, and Jeff Parker walked into the classroom. Vic looked agitated and said, "Finish the chapter and the next ten poems tonight." He told Max.
"Are you crazy?"
"Look, this is haiku poetry. 17 syllables per poem. It ain't a lot, so just go over it and don't skip. It's not that hard." Vic looked over him, growing angrier. "Now get out of my site."
Jeff tentatively made his way in, noticing Vic angrily pacing around the room.
"Excuse me, but my daughter is in your English class, well the class you're substituting for. Me and my wife are supposed to collect the submissions for the publishing." Vic picked up a chair and slammed it down. Jeff blinked.
"You know that kid?" Vic looked at Jeff. "That kid that just left. That extremely smart kid. I guess that nobody ever bothered to notice that he never learned how to read. It pisses me off." He vented. Then looked to a shocked Jeff and offered him a toothpick.
That night, Nancy and Jeff looked over the submissions for the paper.
"Liz's Oak Tree poem was really good, I liked that. These are just, weird." Nancy said.
"Well, I kind of like them" Jeff responded.
"We have to find out which one Liz wrote.."Nancy said, skimming over more. She picked one up and began reading it.. "Oh my God. You don't think...?"
Jeff grabbed the paper, "My juicy sweetness? No, Liz couldn't have.. 'in the cold cement basement of love?'
The two looked worriedly at eachother.
Vic is like, amazing. He's changed a lot of people. I can even see it in Max. Max seems more, like, aware of things. He's not always closing his eyes. Maria is showing up in Vic's class, and Maria never goes to any classes. This is just so.. different.
Soon enough, the poems were published, and students handed them out in the hallways of West Roswell High. The Principal found a copy, and began reading it. He found one poem, and yelled for his secretary. He had to do something about the controvercial poems in the paper.
"I want to see Mr. Vic Racine after school." He told the secretary.
Wow, the paper was actually published. I'm surprised my mother went through with publishing them after reading them. I'm beginning to think that my mom is starting to loosen up now. Maybe my dad talked some sense into her.
Liz was sitting on a bench in the hall, reading over the entries and smiling. Alex came up and sat beside her.
"Isn't this weird?" He asked.
"Yeah, I can't believe it. It's like we're actually voicing our real opinion on things and it's going somewhere."
Back in the bathroom Isabel was brushing her hair, hearing two other girls gossip about the poems.
"Whoever wrote that has like, no self-respect."
"Oh, I know. Like, in the basement. That is so grody."
"Yeah, she has no self-esteem, or she'd actually like, sign it." Isabel had had enough.
"Look, he said not to sign it. It was a rule he made, for the poems to be anonymous." The two girls looked Isabel over.
"Ummm.. excuse me, maybe you should try your own conversation. Come on, let's go." One of the girls said, dragging the other with her.
Maria exited a stall, going to the sink and washing her hands.
"You?" Maria asked, smirking.
"What?" Isabel asked.
"You wrote that haiku poem?"
"Yes..Will you just shut up about it?"
"You wrote that poem, and you don't even want people to know that you wrote it?" Maria asked.
"Oh sure, I'd love for everyone to know that I wrote that poem. God, why am I even discussing this with you. My reputation would, like, totally be over if anyone found out that I wrote that poem." Isabel began freaking out.
"You know how over my rep will be if people find out I didn't write that poem?" Maria said, and the two looked at eachother, trading a silent agreement.
Liz walked in to the bathroom,
"Oh my god, Maria you would so not.." She noticed Isabel there, "Hi," She said awkwardly.
"Hi" Isabel responded.
"Hey there, Chica." Maria said.
"You will not believe this," Liz began, and then looked to Isabel, "You should hear this too. Mr. Foster took all the like, copies of the paper and is refusing to allow anyone to distribute it. I mean, there are a few swarming around, but it's all because of your haiku poem." Liz gestured to Maria.
"Really?" Maria raised a brow.
When Vic found out about the refusal to publish things. He had this like, great idea. To sue to school for refusing us our constitutional rights, or to like, do a walk out. I'm thinking more along the lines of having a walk-out. I don't know. Vic is like, amazing. He's this adult that I can actually look up to and respect. And for the first time, this is something I really want to do.
When Monday finally rolled around, everyone sat in the noisy English class waiting for Vic to show up.
"How about we just go to Mr. Foster and tell him we want it. It's our property, it's our class work." Nick suggested.
Maria and Alex walked into the classroom,
"Liz, did you hear?" Alex asked
"He's not here. People are saying he's fired." Maria announced.
The class quieted down, and Mr. Foster walked in.
"I've read the entries for the school paper, "Liberty Lit.", and I found them unacceptable. If any of you have copies, please turn them in to the administrations office as soon as possible."
"Umm, excuse me?" Liz said, raising her hand. When Mr. Foster nodded to her, she continued. "How are they unacceptable if we can't even read them. Aren't we supposed to voice our opinions? You know, freedom of speech.."
"I'm sorry, but I have certain standards for school authorized publications. Anyone who distributes any copies will be suspended from school. End of story."
Max looked out the window,
"Hey.. it's Vi.. it's Mr. Racine."
The students gathered around the window, and Vic noticed them all watching him. He stuck his fist up in the air, smiling proudly at them all.
"That's it class. Take your seats." Mr. Foster announced.
"All he did was tell us about honesty and truth. He never taught us anything." Sean said.
"Yes he did." Max said. "He did teach." He said, uncomfortably, lowering his voice.
"What?" Sean looked at Max.
"He was the best teacher I ever had." Max said, before returning his amber gaze to the window.
This isn't right. I have to do something. Vic taught us all a lot. He taught us more than any other teacher could have. I think he changed every one of us.
"Come on." Liz said, getting up and pulling Alex and Maria with her. They ran outside and called out to Vic.
"Are you seriousy fired?" Alex asked.
"Something like that."
"But this isn't right." Liz began.
"What, you think injustice doesn't happen all the time, Liz? Well, it happens every day. Wake up."
And in those words, I began to understand. I understood what Vic was telling me. I understood the way society was, the world. The world was full of deceit. And I felt this pull, this pull to do the right thing.
Wedensday morning Liz skipped English class and went to the xerox machine. She stood in the hallway between classes handing out copies.
"Anyone want a copy of the Liberty Lit? It's free. Liberty Lit. Right here."
Sean came up to her. "What, Sean?"
"No.. nothing. I could hand out some of those if you want."
"Why?" Liz asked, apprehensivly.
"Because this is freedom of speech and you're right. I may not like Vic, but this is our rights."
"You know, you could get suspended." Liz said.
"I know." Sean responded, grabbing half of the stack from a smiling Liz.
Liz's biology teacher, Mr. Levits approached Liz.
"Hi Mr. Levits. Would you like a copy of the Liberty Lit?" Liz asked.
"Maybe later, Liz. Right now Mr. Foster wants to see you in his office."
"She's just handing out a school paper," Sean said, "Since when was that a crime?"
"Would you like to join her?" Mr. Levits asked.
"I'll go myself." Liz rolled her eyes, making her way to the principal's office.
In the principal's office, Liz found her parents there sitting with Mr. Foster. Mr. Foster told her he was disappointed in what she was doing, but would let her get away with it without suspending her in terms of Mr. Racine putting the idea in her head. Liz looked disappointed and cheated as she watched her parents leave the school. She deserved punishment for what she did. People deserved to read those poems in the Liberty Lit. It shouldn't have been taken away. But then she realized there was nothing she could do about it.
Once upon a time there lived a girl. She slept in a lovely little cottage made of gingerbread and candy. She was always asleep. One morning she woke up. She woke up.
*Sorry for the length and I hope it didn't bore you.* =/
|posted on 8-Jun-2002 3:54:53 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|JaneLane, Rapunzel, LixMix5, roswellluver, anonymousearfan, frenchkiss70, Juliette, and Lizzie Parker17~ Thanks for the FB and bumps! You guys are great! |
TDDreamerBehr~ More M/L.. you got it.
Alexandra86~ Aww. Thanks. Hehe, it's a huge compliment saying that I capture the show. I personally don't think I do, but hey, at least I'm trying.
Kitcat26~ *whimpers*. We had this Extra credit assignment to do in English where the teacher gave us a list of movies to watch and write a paper on the elements of humour. I wanted to watch Dead Poets Society, but grr! The movie was already rented when I went to get it. Evilness! I ended up watching Dr. Strangelove instead, odd, odd movie. Hehe. And thank you soooo much for the e-card. It made me feel mucho, mucho better. Lol. That was so sweet of you. I wish they reran the show too! If they ever do, I shall let you know.
mpls muse~ Yeah, I thought that would be significant in the fic. Especially in showing the tension between Liz, Maria and Isabel and everything. Also will help to thicken the plot later in the story. =) I'm glad you liked it.
Meagzie~ Thanks for the bump! And your opinion means a lot to me, as does everyone elses. Hehe. Yeah, everyone does have a teacher that actually makes them THINK. Mine is definitely my history teacher, he doesn't just read answers from a book, he enjoys teaching and is good at it. He's even letting all his students paint the tiles on the ceiling and bricks on the wall of his classroom to leave our "mark". =) Thanks for the FB.
SweetCherrykat~ Aww! Thanks. *Blushes*. I'm only trying to capture the show, and the show was very real and honest. To know that I'm doing a good job at portraying that is a huge compliment. Thank you so much. Hehe.
just me~ Hehe. Yes, everything in highschool is life or death. Lol. Yaya! I capture that whole highschoolness in here. Happy me! Thanks!
m14~ Hehe, a shock. Aren't those fun?
And now on to zee next installment.
Love. Who can really, like define love? I mean, how do you know.. when you're in love? I always thought love was when you looked into someone's eyes, and you go all the way to their soul.. and then you both just know. I thought love was what I read in fairytales when I was younger, a prince in shining armor riding up on his white horse. When I was little I had these, like, fantasies that I'd fall in love nursing a blind soldier, I thought that by age 16 I'd have a love life. But, I don't even know what love is.
I do know what a crush is. Pining after someone so much, so much that it hurts. Hence the term crush. It's like, painful. If crushing leads to lust and lust leads to love... then why can't I have it? I've been crushed. By a certain.. Max Evans. I've been in lust with a certain Max Evans.. but I'm not IN love with him. He's not my world, he doesn't complete me. I think that one and one make two. Not two halves make a whole. But sometimes... I wish he would just give me a second glance.
Elizabeth couldn't sleep that night as her thoughts were occupied by Maxwell Evans. After pondering him and analyzing him, and wondering about him... she decided to do what she felt to do. Something that would make her feel better, a way to get all her feelings out. So she grabbed a piece of paper, a pen and started writing. All the thoughts that were on her mind, all the feelings that filled her soul when thinking about Max Evans. The way he leaned, the way he always closed his eyes. The way he brushed her off. The way he kissed her so intensely that she felt like she saw stars, and small glimpses inside his mind.
When I was done writing that note to myself, I felt like, a new person. I didn't feel like a lovesick girl anymore, I felt.. free. I felt like I could be myself, and that I was finally letting myself get over Max Evans.
Liz met Maria and Alex at her locker monday morning.
"I've been practicing so much for Saturday. It's going to be so fun, we're going to cover "I Wanna Be Sedated", I can so not wait." Maria exclaimed.
"Girl, get out that cedar oil, you need to calm down before you hyperventilate." Alex suggested.
Maria grinned, her green eyes shining brightly as she continued,
"Hey, I have reason to be excited. My dream is coming true. I get to like, sing, in a band. And.."
She put her arm around Liz and Alex, "My two best friends are going to be there to watch me during my moment in the sun."
Liz and Alex glanced at eachother and shared a look of happiness for their friend.
"Maria, believe me, no one deserves this more than you." Liz smiled. She tucked a strand of her red streaked hair behind her ear self-consciously before she lowered her voice and whispered. "Hey, you guys, I want to show you something." Alex raised a brow,
"Would this entitle us making a trip to the ladies' room?"
Liz rolled her eyes, pulling out the note she wrote last night.
"I wrote it last night when I couldn't sleep. It contains all my thoughts and feelings about Max." She handed the note to Alex, but Maria snatched it out of his grip and began to read it while Alex looked over her shoulder.
Maria cleared her throat
"Shh." Liz tried silencing her, "there are like, people around us." She grabbed the paper back out of Maria's hands.
"So, like, are you going to send this to him?" Alex asked.
"Are you crazy? It's personal." Liz looked down at her faded white sneakers, " I think it was my way of finally getting over him, you know?" She glanced up timidly.
"So like, can I read it?" Maria asked, puppy dog eyes and all. The minute bell rang, signaling Liz better head to her biology class. She handed the note to Maria.
"Okay, but don't like, show it to anybody."
"God, Liz! I won't. C'mon have a little faith in me, chica."
Liz ran to Bio and got there just as the bell rang.
Okay, I can't like, think properly. My mind is this big jumbled mass of nothing. It's like, I can't even concentrate on this bio lecture and I usually can. Yes, closet science geek can't even be considered a science geek anymore. Maybe that's like, a good thing.
Sean cleared his throat.
"Liz", he whispered. He noticed her staring off into space with a crinkled forehead, seemingly deep in thought. He tried again, a little louder. "Liz!" He swallowed, looked around, and then tried once again, even louder, "LIZ!"..
Liz snapped her head at him, "Jesus. What Krackow?"
"Umm.. we're supposed to be doing the expirament."
"Wha.. what experiment?" Liz asked, annoyed.
Isabel leaned forward and pointed to the lab procedure in front of Liz.
"Thanks, Is." Liz said sarcastically.
So Biology was so not fun. My mind is still on that note I wrote last night, I have this like, really really bad feeling that something horrible is going to happen. Now either it's me overanalyzing everything, like I tend to do... or, it's like, actually going to happen which will prove my lack of luck. I swear, it's like I'm living under a black cloud, or something.
Liz walked out of her Bio class, rushing to her locker, when suddenly someone crashed into her, knocking her books to the floor.
"Great." Liz muttered.
"Oh.. hey Liz." Max said, as he bent down to pick up her books.
Oh, so he's playing it all cool now. Pretending nothing ever happened between us. That note was a good thing, I am completely over him. Now if only my heart would stop pounding and I could tear my gaze away from his eyes.
Max's humming interrupted Liz's thoughts, and a shy smile creeped into her lips. Her dreamy gaze returned to his face.
"Oh, I've been humming this tune all day." He said.
"Oh, so like, you can't get it out of your mind, or something?" Liz asked.
Oh my God, way to point out the obvious Liz... and look like a total ditz in doing so. If only there was a button somewhere that I could like, push to stop talking.
"So umm, what's the song?" Liz asked.
"Oh, just something I've been working on. You know, since I'm in the band Frozen Embryos now, with Michael."
"Yeah.. and Maria's going to be singing some songs with you guys."
Then there was an awkward silence between the two, broken by Max.
"Well, umm. You should hear us sometime. We're starting to sound okay.. well, not really but.."
Is Max Evans like, actually inviting me to do something. Or am I just imagining all of this?
"That's great, I would like, love to. In fact, on saturday I'm going to see you guys when Maria sings." Liz smiled.
"Liz! Liz!" Liz heard her voice being shouted by none other than Maria. Max looked up past Liz at an entering Maria..
"Yeah.. well.. umm.." Max said as he left the other way.
"Liz!" Maria caught up to her out of breath.
"Oh my God Maria"
"Maria you will not believe it."
"No, Liz. Listen to me."
"Maxwell Evans was having an actual conversation with me." She sighed dreamily. "Like, on purpose. It was different."
"Umm, Liz. Don't hate me?" Liz fixed Maria with a wary glare..
"I'm sorry.. I'm really, really sorry."
"Maria, what did you do?"
"I umm.. I kind of.. lost the letter."
Maria hurried up and grabbed her cedar oil from her purse,
"Here Liz, take three deep breaths, it'll help." Maria suggested nervously.
"You lost my letter? That means someone will find it and soon it'll be all over the school and Max... oh my god, what if Max read that letter?" Liz covered her face as it turned a deep shade of red.
I need a hole in the ground that I can like, bury myself into. I wonder if it would work for humans to hybernate. I'll just like, sleep for a long time, and then wake up and this will all have been in the past.
"LIZ!" Maria exclaimed.
"What?" Liz snapped.
"Max Evans was having a conversation with you. A nice one, right?"
"Your point?" Liz asked, gloomily.
"Well, maybe he did read the letter... and, liked it. Maybe it like, soothed his male ego. Or like, some deep hidden inferiority complex he has."
Suddenly Liz heard it again, the same song as before being hummed by the same deep male voice that brought chills down her spine. A smile slowly spread upon her lips as she watched Max's retreating back move across the hall.
How one person can feel completely idiotic one moment and then completely giddy the next is beyond me. But like, it's happening. To. Me. Vic was right, damn teenage hormones. I can't help but smile as I enter my English class knowing that Max will be in there.
Liz was beaming with giddiness as she entered the classroom, only to be greeted by Sean.
"Parker. You got my Scarlet Letter, right?"
"Yeah." Liz said nonchalantly. "So?"
"So I need it back."
Liz glanced to the last row of desks and spotted Max, "Okay, Sean." She said before approaching Maxwell.
"Hey.. umm.. this might sound a little weird but like.." She began.
"Oh, I almost forgot. Here." Max said, handing Liz the letter, careful not to brush his fingers across hers. "I found that yesterday. You.. you wrote it, right?"
"Umm." Liz bit her lip before shaking her head furiously in an attempt to act cool, "Actually, I, I wrote this.. about someone else. It's like, about my umm, boyfriend from last summer. But like, it was too painful to use his name, because he's like, um, cuz he's dead so I used yours.. instead. You know."
Good one Liz. You can't even tell a simple lie. You really are sheltered.
Max got up, ready to leave,
"Look Liz, I didn't read it. Okay? So you don't have to like, explain anything." He closed his eyes briefly like he always did, then began walking away.
"What?" Liz said, following him. "You see your name on a piece of paper and you don't even read it?"
"Well, I.. I read parts of it. Okay?"
"Oh, yeah. I'm not that stupid here, Max. You expect me to believe that?"
"Look, it just didn't hold my interest."
"Oh really?" Liz began to get furious, raising her voice, "What was so boring about it. Was it like, too emotional, too personal. Huh? What was it, I'd really really like to know."
"Just shut up."
Liz was shocked speechless as she looked up into Max's soulful amber eyes.
It was like I suddenly, knew. It was like I could read him and I knew the reason. He was telling the truth about not reading that letter... but then I knew why.
"You.. you couldn't read it, could you?" Liz asked, as a look of concern etched itself onto her wide doe eyes.
Max looked around, clenching his jaw before lowering his voice and keeping his steady amber eyes locked on hers.
"I.. never told anybody before." He suddenly looked away, as if he were ashamed of himself.
"Hey, Max!" Steve, a member from the band called to him. "Michael got us a gig at The Loft tonight."
"Cool." Max replied as if nothing had just happened.
"We should tell the other Embryos, man."
"So you have rehearsal tonight?" Liz asked.
"I guess so." Max slightly smirked.
"Maybe I could, like, come check it out."
"Yeah" Max's smile diminished as he noticed Steve waiting for him. "Whatever." He said before leaving.
Things are starting to happen. Mysteries revealed, secrets told. Okay, so maybe it's not like, this life-altering thing.. but, I know something about Max that no one else knows. And that makes me feel... kind of, special. He may have had sex with Courtney before, but she doesn't even know him. It's almost like I know him like nobody else knows him, like, on a deeper level.
Liz was in her room blasting "Dreams" by The Cranberries as she debated on what outfit to wear. She hopped around her room singing along with Shannon O'Riordon's unique voice. Piles of flannel shirts were thrown all over her unmade bed, and then she spotted it. The perfect outfit. A deep red, knee-length velvety shirt. She pulled it on over her white bra with red polka dots on it.
I really need to start buying bras without my mother around.
She proceeded to put on faded blue jeans with slight holes ripped at the knees. She combed through her long hair, and glanced at herself in the mirror. The grunge look... comfy, yet... comfy. She looked at her face, skimming over her features. The most noticable thing on her face were her eyes, and the slight scar above her left eyebrow. She ran her hand over it and sighed.
Sometimes it seems like we're all living in this prison. And the crime is how much we hate ourselves. It's good to get really dressed up once in a while, and admit the truth. That when you look really really closely, people are so strange and complicated that they're actually beautiful. Possibly even me.
A soft smile appeared on the corners of her mouth, and Liz heard a light knocking on her bedroom door.
Nancy slightly opened the door.
"Honey, that Maria girl and Alex boy are here."
"Okay" Liz said, nonchalantly. "I'll be down in a second."
"So... Elizabeth?" Liz sighed
"Is it just me, or does Alex wear eyeliner?"
Liz rolled her eyes.
"Sorry, it's just... weird seeing a guy with eyeliner on, that's all."
"Are you done now, mother?"
"Maria is very free-spirited." Nancy mentioned.
"Mom. I gotta go." Liz said, then brushed past her mother and headed downstairs, shouting "See ya later." as she headed out the door.
I have little patience. I can't wait. It takes so long for the time to pass as you sit there waiting for something. I'm sitting here in the middle of Alex and Maria, thank God they're here. I don't know what I'd like, do without them. I'm waiting for the band to stop setting up and checking all their equipment and to start playing their music. I can see Maria checking out Michael through the corner of my eye. Alex, I'm not sure whether he's checking out one of the guys or just... admiring the equipment. I'm watching Max tune his guitar, his brown hair is brushing over his forehead and he looks incredibly sexy. Now I find myself growing even more impatient. I want to hear him sing, I want to hear that knew song he's been working on.
"Damn, break me off a piece of that." Maria's voice interrupted Liz's thoughts.
"Huh?" Liz said, dazed.
"Michael has one fine ass. Well, so does Max." She noted. Liz laughed, burying her face in her hands.
"Maria, you're incredible."
"I know, chica."
"You know, I should start a band." Alex stated, pondering the thought.
"Alex, hon, you don't even have a guitar." Maria stated.
"Hey, I'm a fast learner."
The strong, prominent male voice could be heard over the microphone.
"Testing, testing. Check. Check."
"That's my man!" She shouted, winking up at Michael. He smirked, and then Max took his place at the microphone.
"Okay, umm.. this is something I call Red."
Alex and Maria exchanged questioning looks as Max strummed his guitar and started singing.
"I was going nowhere
Going nowhere fast
Drowning in my memories
Living in the past..
Everything looked black til I found her
She's all I need, and that's what I said.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, I call her "Red."
"Oh My God!" Maria exclaimed, grabbing Liz's hand, her mouth dropped open.
"Liz, Red, that's you!." Alex joined in the excitement.
Liz was unable to break her gaze away from Max, she lightly said in desbelief,
"No, it can't be."
Max closed his eyes, getting the feel of the song. Letting his voice carry the words that fit so perfectly with the mellow sound of the music.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I call her Red.
Yeah, yeah, yeah."
"She's my shelter from the storm,
She's a place to rest my head.
Late at night, she keeps me safe and warm."
"I call her 'Red'.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I call her 'Red.'"
Max stopped singing only to lightly strum the last notes on his guitar.
"Oh my God, you guys are right." Liz swallowed, brushing her hair behind her ear.
"Umm, that's all I have. So far." Max looked at the crowd, almost embarassed.
I couldn't believe it. And after that, I couldn't believe what I did. I acted on impulse.
Liz ran up to the stage, trying to hide her giddiness.
"Wow.. that was great!"
"Listen. Do you want to maybe see a movie.. sometime?" Liz asked, trying to sound casual.
"Uh, yeah, sure." Max said hesitantly
"Great. Umm, maybe like, tomorrow at around 7:00 or something?"
"Yeah." Max looked around hesitantly. "Umm. You want a ride home?" Liz's giddiness multiplied
I'm in Max Evans car, and he's driving me home. We're not just sitting in his car. We're going somewhere. I feel the wind blowing my hair back, and as I look at Max's perfect profile while he's driving, I can feel all these emotions rushing through my body. Everything I wrote in that note is coming back to me now, and I'm letting it. I'm not hiding the way I feel. I'm embracing it... and I like, like it.
Max pulled into her driveway and put the car in park.
"So, I'll see you tomorrow?" Liz asked.
"Yeah." Max replied casually. "Um, thanks for coming and watching. You really like the way we sound?"
"Yeah." Liz beamed. "It was so cool."
Please kiss me. Please kiss me. Please kiss me.
Max leaned across the car, and brushed some hair behind her ear.
"I'm glad you liked it."
I can smell his calogne, it's strong and powerful. I can feel his fingers running through my hair and lingering behind my ear. I can feel my heart pounding, testing my ultimate patience as he leans closer and closer to my face.
Max suddenly pulled back, taking a deep breath.
"Umm, see ya, Liz." He said, and Liz was disappointed until she saw a very rare genuine smile cross his lips that prompted her own.
"See ya, Max." She said, getting out of his car and slowly walking onto her porch. She turned around and watched his red convertible zoom across the street, top down and all. She did a little dance of glee outside of her house.
"Liz?" She froze mid-twirl, her hands above her head in a graceful ballet-like gesture. "What are you doing?" Sean's voice interrupted her happiness.
"Sean, it's none of your business."
"Liz, you just got out of Max Evans' car. You didn't leave with Max."
"What are you, like, spying me or something?" Liz asked, getting annoyed.
Sean is like, this big annoying piece of my life that I just can't stand. He's always THERE. Always there to interrupt my moments of happiness. I just want to strangle him sometimes.
Sean turned his head away, trying to hide the pink approaching his face.
"No, like your life is so interesting to me, Liz. 'Ooh, look at me, I'm Liz Parker, I'm way cool.. hanging out with my way cool friends to go sniff floor wax.'"
Liz blinked before bursting into laughter.
"See ya, Krackow." Liz said, walking into her house.
Sean rolled his eyes as a smile formed on his lips.
|posted on 16-Jun-2002 11:31:59 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|I'm back with an update. I'm kind of afraid of how you'll react to it. =/. I don't know, I'm not exactly happy with the way it turned out.. but it had to be done.. to tie into the previous chapter. Hmph.. I promise the chapter after it will be much better. Just have a little faith. Lol.. and patience. =/ Okay, enough procrastinating..|
TD DreamerBehr, Rapunzel, b4echstarrynite, JaneLane, just me, juliette, roswellluver, Cinder, abbs007, and frenchkiss70~ Thanks for the FB. =)
Kitcat26~ Hehe, your FB always cheers me up. =) Max was shaping up.. but umm.. it's going to take a little bit longer for him to completely shape up.. but I promise, he will. I'm a dreamer!! So please don't hate me for the next part. You are catching on about Max's thoughts though on why he's being all jerkyish.
Meagzie~ Yaya! Yes, Liz is so emotional and yet simple.. pretty much going through what every teenage girl faces. The moment when they want to let themselves go but are held back by past friendships and family.. it's fun to write, and I'm glad you like it. =) As for the scar thing, I just based it off of her looks. You know how Shiri got the scar from a dog bite or something.. and well, it's obviously evident on Liz Parker's character on Roswell.. so I just through it in there, also to add to the thoughts. If that makes any sense..
m14~ Aw. I love getting FB. It's the complete opposite of boring. I'm so glad you like how this is turning out and how I'm writing it. FB is very inspring and I enjoy getting it. Hehe. Thanks!
Katalina~ Okay, just this last very MSCL part to kind of sum up the previous chapter.. and then I PROMISE, it will get more Roswellish.. I swear, I have it all planned out now. I just hope my writing will work with it.
wenhaver~ I know how annoying it is when ppl spell names wrong. I get mad when Sarah McLachlan is spelled wrong.. hehe, sorry. =/ I'll have to keep that in mind. Thanks for letting me know, I feel like a moron. Hehe.. Glad you like the story though. Thanks for the FB.
ChaosTheory~ Sean is just this annoying person in Liz's life that she pretty much tends to take her anger out on. Heh.. Yeah. Lol, glad you like it so far..
Have you ever noticed how like, when things start happening in your life, it all happens at once. I swear, this is like the busiest week of my life. Going on a date with Max tonight, seeing Maria sing in Max's band this weekend, and Halloween coming up, my favorite holiday... it's like, my life is starting to become exciting. I'm finding purpose. Maybe that's why I'm actually looking forward to going to school today. Maybe that's why I'm actually up on time and not hitting my snooze button.
Liz ran downstairs humming the tune to "Red" as she poured herself a cup of coffee.
"Hi mom." Liz said cheerfully.
"Okay, who are you and what have you done with my daughter?" Nancy asked warily. Liz laughed in response.
"Mom, I'm happy." Nancy continued to give Liz a weird look. "Mom. I can go on like, dates, right?"
Nancy was taken aback at Liz's question. She knew sooner or later that her baby girl would grow up and that dating woud soon be approaching, she just didn't expect it to be this soon.
"Umm.. well, yes." Nancy replied. Liz jumped up happily, kissing her mother on the cheek. "But.. your father and I have to meet him first." The smile quickly faded from Liz's lips.
"Mom, that is so old-fashioned. Nobody does that anymore."
"Well then, Liz, it's either that or no date." Nancy said sternly. Liz rolled her eyes, grabbing her backback and slinging it over her shoulder.
"K, mom. I gotta get to school."
Today is, like going really slow, I'm walking towards my locker only to find none other than Alex and Maria there. I can see Maria jumping up and down happily, I swear I cannot get over her free-spirit. She's so completely different than anyone I know. You just gotta love her.
As Maria was talking to Alex she looked past him towards Kyle and Isabel making out by Isabel's locker. Kyle noticed her and became uneasy.
"Umm, Maria DeLuca is staring at us." Isabel turned her head and gave a slight smile to Maria before replying to Kyle.
"She's so dirty. So slutty. The things you hear about her are just.." Isabel rolled her eyes, suddenly feeling the need to stick up for Maria.
"Oh, get over it." She said somewhat irritably.
"Huh?" Kyle asked.
"You know perfectly well that if a guy went around sleeping with a bunch of girls he'd get some sort of medal for it, he'd be praised in fact. Just because she's a girl means she's.. she's.. like.."
"Hey.." Kyle said gently, putting an arm around Isabel. "I was just making conversation. I thought you hated her?"
Isabel suddenly became defensive.
"Well, yeah I do. But not because she's promiscuous. There are many other reasons to hate her." Kyle smiled and leaned down to kiss her.
Across the hall, Liz joined Alex and Maria at their lockers.
"It was so amazing. I just keep thinking that moment over and over in my head. Him making a song about me. It's insane." Liz bellowed joyfully. "And like, I want to see him so bad, but I want to be like, prepared for it, you know?' Liz rambled on while Alex smiled in understanding,
"Yeah, that's how I'd be. You know, he goes to P.E. fifth hour, maybe you could like, sneak over there or something and talk to him."
Liz smiled happily,
"Thanks, Alex. You're the best." She leaned up and gave him a friendly kiss on the cheek.
So I made it through 1st, 2nd, 3rd and 4th hour with minor interruptions from Sean. Now I'm psyching myself up to talk to Max. I have to like, tell him about the odd rules my family oh so graciously bestowed upon me. God, it's like my parents don't remember what it was like to be young, or something.
Liz paced around the gym entrance.
"Hi Max.. Hey.... Oh, hey Max, what's up?... Oh, hi Max.."
"Liz?" Liz turned around, seeing Max standing before her. She blushed, looking down.
"Umm, hi Max." Max looked around, playing it cool.
"I just, I can't get that song you wrote out of my head." Liz said, looking up with a giddy smile on her delicate lips.
"Yeah, well I'm not done with it." Max said, looking down, not used to compliments. Liz just looked at him in awe, studying his features for a moment.
Why doesn't he realize how special he is? How come nobody noticed he couldn't read before Vic? I swear, I'd like, give anything to like, help him... maybe I can.
"So.. umm. That movie tonight.. my parents kind of have to meet you first. They're really weird like that.." Liz found herself rambling.
"Oh, okay.." Max said.
"Great." Liz beamed.. "So, I'll uh, see you later. I gotta get to class."
My emotions are on, like overdrive right now. Everything is looking so much brighter in my life. It's weird how well things can actual work out. I wish this moment could just last forever.
Liz stood in her room, applying make-up to enhance her natural look when she heard a high-pitched voice.
"Why are you so dressed-up?"
Liz jumped back on guard.
"God, Tess. Do you ever knock?"
"Are you going on a date?"
"Tess, when I want you to know something, I'll tell you." Liz pointed to her door. "Now leave."
"God, I swear I am like invisible in this house." Tess muttered on her way out.
Okay, I told Max to pick me up at 7:00.. it's now 7:30. Maybe he just like, forgot. Maybe I should have reminded him. Maybe I should have gotten his phone number to remind him. No, then I would have sounded like a pushy girl and I'm not like that. Maybe he just.. Oh, God, maybe he got in an accident or something.
"Liz?" Liz snapped out of her thoughts at her mother's voice. "He's coming, right?"
"Oh, yeah." Liz said. "We just kept it kind of loose... ya know."
Minute by minute I've been sitting here watching the clock move ever so slowly. And now it's 8:00. I have this horrible feeling in my gut that he's not showing up, that he's not in some fatal accident and that I'm just making excuses for him. God, I probably scared him off or something earlier. I'm such a moron. Why am I like this?
Liz had to fight the tears that were threatening to spill from her eyes.
"I'm sorry, honey." Jeff said, patting his daughter on the arm. Just then the doorbell rang and a glimmer of hope took hold on Liz's features.
"I'll get it." Tess said, running up to the door, her little blond curls bouncing on the way. Liz stood up, taking a deep breath and waiting as everything played out in slow motion before her.
The first thing I saw was Tess's smile, and then I turned my head to see the face at the door, only to find that it was none other than..
"Sean?" Liz asked in disappointment.
"Woah, Liz. I came to return Star Wars to your dad... why, what are you wearing?" Liz looked over herself,
"No, seriously. Why are you all dressed up?" Sean asked.
"Not like it's any of your business but I have a date tonight." Liz looked up at him, "With Max Evans."
"Max Evans? That idiot?" Sean asked. He knew she liked him, but he didn't think that anything would come from it. Liz immediately took offense.
"Don't you dare call him that! You just, you don't know. You have no idea about him." Liz shouted.
"Yeah? Well maybe I don't but neither do you!" Sean shouted back at her. The two stood staring furiously at eachother before Liz stormed upstairs and Sean stormed outside the open door.
I will not cry, I will not cry. I will NOT cry.
Liz fought hard to stop the tears from spilling down her cheeks but once she entered her room she slammed the door shut and crumpled herself up in the fetal position on the floor. The tears rolled down her cheeks and she was ashamed. Ashamed that she was crying over this. She never cried over boys before.
A soft knock came from the door before Liz saw her mother walk in with vanilla ice cream.
"I thought you might want some.." Nancy smiled gently. Liz sniffled, wiping her tears away with her hand and stood up shakily. "You can eat it out of the carton." Nancy said, sitting down on Liz's bed. Liz joined her and Nancy sighed.
"I'm glad he didn't show up."
"What?" Liz asked.
"I wasn't ready for this. You're my baby girl and it's hard seeing you grow up so fast."
There's something soothing about sharing ice cream out of a carton with your mother and hearing her tell you how much she values you. Me and my mom very rarely ever bond, I'm actually kind of closer to my dad than her. It's really kind of scary that my mom is here with me right now and I don't have this urge to like, kill her.
"You know, it's his loss." Nancy said. Liz sighed.
"Mom, I don't want to think about this right now."
Across the town in Michael's loft, Max sat down waiting to practice with the Frozen Embryos. His thoughts went to Liz and he felt something he never felt before. He felt regret and guilt. Max sat down with his guitar in his lap, staring at the phone. Should he call her?
"Hey, Max.. come on, let's play." Max raked his hand through his hair, before standing up, grabbing his guitar, taking his place in front of the microphone and strumming the chords to "Red".
I managed to come to school today. I forced myself to get up and face the music. My heart hurts, my head hurts, my feelings are completely warped and all I can count on right now are my friends.
"Well, you haven't heard his side of the story." Maria said, reassuringly. "Maybe he has a valid reason. Maybe you should talk to him or something."
"No, I don't want to talk to him ever again." Liz said, trying to convince herself more than anyone else.
"Well, here he comes now." Alex said, and Liz turned her head in time to see Max approaching them.
This life has been a test. If it had been an actual life you would have received instructions on where to go and what to do.
Liz and Maria gave Max an evil glare before brushing past him, leaving him alone with Alex. Max looked to him, appearing completely clueless.
"Liz is kind of.. umm, upset. You know.. that you never showed up." Alex said, hoping to drill information from him. Maybe get his side of things.
"Yeah.. that makes sense." Max looked around, then started whispering. "She.. she wanted me to meet her parents.. and I wasn't in the mood. It's like, she's.. she.. she knows too much already. Well, not exactly, more like, she just makes a big deal out of things, she's.. complicated." Max tried explaining.
"Oh.. Well, I guess she was confused." Alex said. "You know, after that song that was totally obvious about what you wrote.."
"Yeah, my car."
Alex raised his eyebrows in surprise as the bell rang.
Maria stood in the bathroom next to Isabel as they put make-up on.
"So.. you and Kyle do it yet?" Maria asked bluntly. Isabel looked shocked.
"That is so none of your business."
"I know it's none of my business. I mean, we're not friends. We absolutely hate eachother, and that is why I'm asking you. Come on, ask me anything.. it's refreshing." Maria smirked. Isabel gave her this strange look.
"You are so weird. I don't understand you."
"Duh squared. Life would be dull if I weren't like this." Maria grinned.
Isabel gave Maria a long, hard look before bending down to see if she could spot any legs underneath the bathroom stalls.
"Look, I made this vow to myself to not go all the way until I'm ready.. and I am just not ready yet."
Maria gave Isabel a questioning look.
"What about that 'Haiku' you wrote?" When Isabel didn't respond she continued. "Look, it's like, I saw you two kissing in the hallway and you looked like you were reaching total exstacy or something. I mean.. I don't always get that with guys."
"Maybe you just haven't found the right guy yet." Isabel suggested.
Maria shook her head, laughing.
"I've tried all sorts of guys. None of them have been 'it'."
"You'll find him." Isabel reassured her, smiling. Maria thought of Michael and the possibilities she had with him.
Well, I made it through school. It was only the most excruciatingly long day ever. Every class I had with Max I forced myself not to look in his direction. Sometimes, I'd get this weird feeling that he was looking at me though. I don't know why, it was this like, strange sense. Maybe I'm just crazy, or thinking too much.. I wonder why I even bother. I'm so like, annoyed with myself. I'm so annoyed by guys. God, I'm annoyed by this life.
Liz peered out the window to find her father playing catch with Tess. She heard Tess giggling as she caught the ball and threw it back to her dad. Liz smiled as a memory of herself playing catch with her father emerged.
Wow, this is my family. My mom standing behind me, the person who actually tried making me feel better when I was hurt by a boy. My father, the person who always told me to stand up for my rights, outside playing catch with my annoying little sister who's just... plain annoying, although I can't help but love her. In that.. annoying, gotta love your younger sister kind of way.
Sometimes, when things get really complicated, it's nice to take time off from what you normally do and just spend it with your family, enjoying the simple things. I guess one thing that'll always be there for you is your family, and maybe you should learn to appreciate them more.
"Come on, let's go." Nancy said from behind Liz. She smiled at her daughter before they ran outside to join their family.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 16-Jun-2002 11:33:19 PM ]
|posted on 23-Jun-2002 8:39:45 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Hehe... hi everyone, it's me again. I've come back with an... um.. very short part. =/. I'm sure you'll have a bunch of questions after it, but bear with me. My brother is temporarily home from college, and I can't really concentrate while he's here.. so I wrote this when he was out with his friends. It's short, but some Roswell is starting to kick in. =) Anyway, not much M/L in this... but yeah.. I'll stop justifying myself and start replying to your FB. Hehe..|
Katalina, frenchkiss70, Rapunzel (Thanks for the Bump as well!!), Cinder and JaneLane~ Thank you all for the FB. =)
abbs007~ Hehe. Max is a hard one to understand. Within time you'll get the answers though.. I have it all planned out.. mwah haha..
Kitcat26~ Hehe. I understand your bitterness towards the male species.. I have my moments as well. Hmmm, Isabel and Maria, their bathroom talk shall be a fun thing to watch. I think they're just in denial
of their possible friendship forming though.
TD DreamerBehr~ Hehe. Well, it's good to know that you can't understand Max very well... let's me know that I'm doing a good job with that whole mysterious persona he has. =) As I said to abbs, within time it shall be answered. =)
Meagzie~ Lol. Max needs to be told that rule of yours, and yes, you are right. This is a different type of situation.
m14~ I love your FB. Thanks.
On yeah, one more thing. The Italics signify a flashback. =)
I know that I should be hating Max right now for hurting me.. and I do, on some level. But there's just something about those mysterious, rebellious guys that just make you want to reach out and help them no matter how much they hurt you. It's almost like they're a wounded puppy, you just want to take care of them and nurse them back to health... I can't believe I'm doing this.
On the way to school, Sean took his regular seat in front of Liz Parker. She tapped him on the shoulder,
"What, Parker?" He asked.
"Can I trust you to like, keep a secret?" Sean couldn't hide the surprise that was evident on his face that Liz was actually confiding in him. Maybe their friendship was returning.
"Sure. What is it?" Liz looked around, making sure no one could hear her.
"Okay, well you know Max Evans?"
"He can't.." Liz felt bad that she was telling Sean something that seemed personal to Max, but this was the only way she could think of helping him. Sean was brilliant, had the top grades in the juniour class, and could help Max.
"He can't read." Liz said.
"Really?" Sean asked, wondering how nobody ever noticed before.
"Yeah. Look, and nobody really knows. Besides me, and Vic."
"Vic?" Sean remembered how much he hated the way Vic taught, and how much Max seemed to like him. No wonder Max thought highly of Vic as a teacher. "So, what do you want me to do about it?" He asked warily. Liz smiled at him.
"You are like, the smartest person I know. Maybe you could tutor him, help him learn how to read." Liz suggested. "If you don't that's fine, I just think that you could be the person to help him." Liz spoke with sincerity. Sean smiled at her quickly before shrugging and responding.
"What?" Liz asked, surprised. "You want to do it?"
"I'm sure you could get extra credit for it or something." Liz said, smiling. Sean didn't care about the extra credit.
"So how did that date with Max go?" Liz answered him with a harsh glare.
"Sean.. turn around, face forward and stop talking."
I'm walking into school today, and I have this weird feeling that something is going to happen. I feel like I'm in a dream. You know how everything seems to be going in slow motion and it's all blurry... and you just get this real sense of deja vu? It's like I've dreamt this before, but I couldn't remember the dream until now. Maybe I'm just like, psychic or something.. or psychotic..
Alex and Maria joined Liz at her locker, like usual.
"Hey chica." Maria greeted her.
"Okay, today is really weird."
"How so?" Alex asked.
"I don't know. It just like, is. At least it's friday. This week has been THE longest week ever." Maria and Alex exchanged glances.
"Still drooling over Max Evans?" Maria asked.
"Girl, you seriously need to find a new boy toy." Alex chided.
"Yes, and as dutiful friends, we shall help you seize and conquer a guy." Maria grinned, taking a sip of vodka from her water bottle..
"I don't want one." Liz said, watching Max as he passed her through the hall. "Believe me, I'm over Max Evans."
Sean approached the group,
"Hey, sorry to um.. interrupt." He looked at Alex and Maria, "Whatever warped and twisted thing you guys were discussing.." Maria smiled,
"You're good, Sean." She winked.
"Whatever." Sean rolled his eyes before looking at Liz, "but can I talk to you alone.. about the.."
"Hey, if you want to say something to Lizzie here, you can say it in front of all of us." Maria said.
"It's about Max." Alex perked up at this.
"You know something about Max that we don't? That's all the more reason to tell us." Sean was getting annoyed,
"It's what we talked about earlier, on the bus."
"Okay.." Liz looked at Maria and Alex, "I'll talk to you guys later, okay?"
"Just remember... Saturday, I'm performing!" Maria shouted as Liz and Sean walked off.
"Do you still want me to tutor him?" Sean asked.
"Yeah." Liz said, waiting for him to continue. "Was that all?"
"Yeah, that's all I needed to know." Sean said, going to his classroom.
Like I said, total case of deja vu. I like, could have sworn this has happened before in a dream. This excruciatingly long dream.. I don't remember words, just actions... and these actions.. are now taking place.
It happened in English class. Liz took her usual seat and made eye contact with Sean, nodding her head towards the back where Max sat. Sean dutifully got up and approached Max, she watched as they spoke to each other, studying their faces. Sean quickly glanced at Liz, and Liz thought he looked nervous, like he was trying to think of some elaborate lie that he couldn't quite think of. She of all people knew how bad Sean was at lying. Liz rolled her eyes as she remembered Sean always being the geeky friend who always told the truth. Then she saw Max's face. His eyes bored into hers from across the room, and then they closed, just like they always did. She saw the movement of his adams apple as he gulped, and the questioning crinkle of his forehead as he looked at her again before returning his gaze to Sean.
"Okay, class." The new substitute called out above the talking. "The bell rang, come on people, take your seats."
Sean went back to the front of the class in the very first seat, ready to learn. Liz tried to get his attention to find out what happened, but he wouldn't look at her. She took a piece of paper, crumpled it into a ball, looked to the front of the room very briefly to find the sub scrawling something on the chalkboard, and chucked it at Sean. He looked at her and she mouthed
"What happened?" Sean mouthed back,
"I'm trying to pay attention." Liz rolled her eyes at that. Sean licked his lips and mouthed "I'll tell you after class." Liz nodded.
"Isabel.. Isabel Cherski". Liz's head snapped up to the front of the room in time to see Isabel walk up to the teacher's desk, grab a note the sub handed her, read it, and leave the classroom. Liz peered her head forward to see that her father was in the hallway talking to Isabel.
Wait a second.. why is my father..
"Wait a minute." Liz found herself voicing aloud. She got up from her seat and headed towards the door.
"Elizabeth." The teacher called,
"That's my father." Liz said, as she headed out in the hallway. Sean shrugged to himself and thought, so much for telling her what happened with Max.
Liz found her dad saying something about driving Isabel somewhere.
"One second." Jeff said to Isabel before pulling Liz to the side.
"Isabel's dad had a heart attack."
"Oh my God." Liz said, and then she heard the muffled sounds of Isabel crying. She turned her head to find Isabel facing away, trying to fight tears. Liz wanted to comfort her former best friend but didn't know how. Everything was awkward between them.
"I'm going to take her straight to the hospital, you might want to go straight to her house after school. Nancy's going to be there." Liz nodded as she watched her father guiding Isabel through the dark hallways.
When I was little, I practically lived at Isabel's house. Her room was like, our sanctuary. Only then, we probably thought of it as our world.
Isabel lie in bed playing with her hospital bracelette while Liz sat down on the edge of the bed. Liz looked to the orange drink that was sitting on Isabel's nightstand.
"Can I have some?" Liz asked, pointing towards the drink. Isabel shook her head no. "Why not?"
"Because you'll get my germs." Isabel looked down, ashamed.
"I don't care." Liz said boldly, "I want my tonsils out too." Is shook her head no again,
"It hurts." Liz took Isabel's hand in hers,
"Squeeze my hand as hard as it hurts." Liz said, a bright smile forming on her lips. Isabel gave her a questioning look. "Come on, just do it. So that I know how much it hurts." Isabel squeezed Liz's hand with all her might..
When Nancy heard Liz come in to the Cherski's house, she called out.
"Oh good, you're here. I'm going to uh... go to the hospital, okay?'
"Oh." Liz said.
"Poor Isabel." Nancy sighed, "that poor girl. I'll send her your love."
"Mom, I want to go with you to the hospital." Nancy shook her head,
"No, Liz. Honey, you need to stay home and watch Tess.
"Mom. I need to go to the hospital." Liz said firmly. "If I get someone to watch Tess can I go?" Nancy looked around nervously before nodding in the affirmative.
Liz ran across the block to Sean's house.
"Hey Liz, what happened?"
"Isabel's dad is in the hospital. He had a heart attack, I need you to watch Tess when she gets home from school." Liz pleaded.
"Okay." Sean said.. "How's Isabel taking it?" It dawned on Liz that she really didn't know.
"Fine. She's taking it fine." Liz said. "You know what time the bus lets out for her, right?"
"Here." Liz handed him the keys to her house.
"Parker." Sean called as Liz turned. She stopped,
"Do you want to know about what happened with Max?"
"You can tell me later, I've got more important things to deal with right now."
I've been sitting here in the hospital for nearly 2 hours. I'm sitting outside room 213. If I look through the glass window I can see Isabel, Mrs. Cherski, my mom and my dad in there all gathered around Mr. Cherski's hospital bed. He's lying on the bed, eyes closed. Isabel's face is tear-stained, and my mom and dad are hugging. I would go in there if I felt I belonged there.. but I don't.
Jeff, Mrs. Cherski and Isabel walked out of the hospital room.
"You want to come get some snacks with us?" Jeff asked.
"No." Liz said, sitting back down on the worn out wooden seat. Liz saw Mrs. Cherski put her arm around Isabel and walk off together. Jeff sat down next to Liz,
"Camille is going to stay the night at the hospital and I don't think it would be good for Isabel to be alone tonight. She's going to stay with us for a couple days, until Jack feels better. He's going to be all right." Jeff added reassuringly.
Liz looked back into the room, he didn't look like he'd be all right.
"Okay." Jeff looked back to the room and then stood up. "Come on, let's get something to eat." Liz nodded and went with her dad to the vending machines.
"I know you and Isabel haven't been getting along very well lately." Jeff began, "But just, try to be nice to her. It's hard on her."
"Dad, I know. I have common courtesy, you know."
Liz started to walk back to room 213 when her dad seemed to be holding her back.
"Let's just walk around for a little bit." He suggested.
"No, I want to see mom." Liz said, continuing her walk through the deserted hallway to the dark room. Her senses took in the smell of antiseptics and all the strong smells that were supposed to help the sick, the dying, the people fighting for their lives. When Liz reached the room, she put her hand on the glass and looked inside. A bright light illuminated the hospital room, and Liz had to close her eyes shut tight as the whiteness seeped passed her eyelids. When darkness returned, she opened her eyes and saw her mom remove her hand from Mr. Cherski's chest.
Nancy looked behind her to see Liz's blank expression through the glass window. Jeff came up behind Liz,
"We'll tell you later." He whispered just before Isabel and Camille Cherski returned.
*insert suspenseful music here.. not really, but yea.* Lol.
|posted on 29-Jul-2002 11:45:01 AM by Wench On A Leash|
|Mwarh harhar, I think I've kicked my writer's block in the ass! Yaya! Well, hopefully, my bind is bursting with ideas for this fic. Teeheehee. Anyway, first off I must thank all my loyal readers...|
JaneLane, Rapunzel, frenchkiss70, Shama and Lizzie_Parker17~ Thanks so much for the FB. =)
b4echstarrynite~ Lol. Yes, I can tell you're a die-hard dreamer. Glad you like the way this is going. Teeheehee.
Meagzie~ I've been hiding. >_<. But I come behring a new part. Mwah haha, I've een dealing with a bit of writer's block.. but I think I've overcome that horrible beast, so I'm sooooorrry for the loooong delay.
KitCat26~ Lol. I love your scenarios. Us Michiganians with our crazy scenarios. Hehe, I'm totally enjoying writing this fic. I get to put a little of me into it, I'm so happy you're enjoying how this is going.
Jiggers~ Don't worry, gradually the fic will leave the dominant MSCL-ish aspect and enter more along the lines of Roswell. I shall not have the "Jordan/Rayanne" thing happen. So it's all good. =)
m14~ I enjoy your weird imagination. Weird imaginations make life interesting. =) Hope you like the next part.
LixMix5~ Ty for the FB. I have everything all planned out, you may be surprised to Max's reaction. Although, you won't really see it until a couple chapters.
*And thanks for all the bumps you wonderful people, you*
"So, is anybody hungry?" Jeff asked as he closed to the door to his house behind him.
"No thanks." Isabel said.
"No, not really." Liz said.
Even though my stomach is rumbling and I haven't eaten anything since breakfast today...
I guess, there are more important matters to discuss right now.
Liz looked to her father and then to Isabel and to the ground.
"Okay, well Isabel make yourself at home." Jeff announced. "Liz, take her up to your room." Liz nodded and led the way to her bedroom. Isabel peaked inside, noticing Liz's wall adorned with posters of bands like Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins, and Incubus.
"Wow, it's different."
"Yeah." Liz replied. "Umm.. so, you can like, sleep in here for the next couple of days. Or whatever. I'll go and sleep on the couch or something." Isabel shrugged.
"Okay." She picked up a magazine off of Liz's dresser and planted herself on her bed, skimming through the pages. Liz just stood there silently, waiting for Isabel to say something. After a couple awkward minutes passed she moved towards the door.
"Okay, I'm going to go downstairs now." Isabel didn't even look up from the magazine.
I guess Isabel doesn't really want to talk about her dad. I mean, I'm here for her and she knows that. I think. Either way, I'm still really weirded out by what my mother did. The whole thing is just really creepy. I know that Mr. Cherski did not look too good at all... and after my mom, like, did whatever she did he looked healthier.
Liz walked down the stairs, pondering her family and why she suddenly felt so alone, so out of touch with her parents.
"Liz?" Jeff asked. "Where's Tess?"
"Oh god." Liz announced, running towards the door and grabbing a light jacket. "Poor Sean, he's been stuck with her all this time." She flung the door open ready to leave when Sean stood right before her. Tess strutted into the house while Sean followed. "I'm sorry, Sean. I kind of forgot she was gone."
"Thanks." Tess said sarcastically, "God, I really am invisible in this house."
"Tess, shut up." Liz hissed.
I love my sister. Really, I do.
"Yeah." Sean looked towards the stairs. "So um, how's Isabel doing?" Liz shrugged, when Isabel suddenly came down the stairs.
"Hi Sean." She said sweetly. "What are you doing here?"
"Just returning Tess and, I heard about your father. I'm sorry."
"He's going to be okay." Is said assuring herself. "Thanks for the concern though." Liz just stood there awkwardly.
"Sean, I want to show you something." Isabel said before going back upstairs and motioning for him to follow.
Okay. Am I dreaming? Did I just see Isabel like, befriend Sean and let him upstairs into my room.. that's like, hers right now... but not?
Liz stood there dumbfounded.
Okay... I'm not dreaming, I can hear Isabel and Sean laughing.
Liz shook her head and went to her father.
"Dad, what happened earlier today?"
"I think we should wait until your mother gets home to tell you this."
"Okay... so then it must be a like, big thing, right?"
"Depends on how you look at it." Jeff said, lightheartedly.
"Right. So, when's mom gonna be back?"
Wow, a deep, heartfelt conversation with my dad. I'm like, stuck right now. I can't exactly go upstairs to my room because well, because Isabel is there. With Sean. And I can't even get information out of my dad about whatever happened earlier.
The phone rang.
"I got it!" Liz yelled only to pick up the phone and find Tess interrogating a male voice on the other end. "Tess, get off the phone." Only when Liz heard the click did she speak. "Hello?"
"Hey Alex. What's up?"
"Yeah, I heard about Isabel. Is she okay?"
"Yeah." Liz could still hear laughter emmanating from upstairs. "More than okay actually."
"How did you hear about Isabel anyway?"
"Oh, everyone's heard about it. It got around the whole school by like, 5th hour."
"Why am I not surprised by that?" Liz stated blatantly as she planted herself down on the couch, grabbing the remote control and flipping through the stations.
"Yeah, go figure. Anyway, are you still going to come to the concert tomorrow night?"
"Of course, Alex, Maria's going to be singing. Why wouldn't I go?"
"Oh I don't know, in case like, you wanted to stay there for Isabel or something." Liz set down the remote control and took another quick glance up the stairs.
"No, I think she'll manage. Besides, I promised Maria, you know. I want to be there for her."
"That's good." Alex said, "Because you know, she was worried."
"Worried about what?" Liz questioned.
"That you'd not come. Like, I mean, she would have understood you know, given what's happened, but she was just afraid."
"Okay." Liz said, wondering what Maria had to be scared about.
"Anyway, besides that. You know who else will be there."
"Who.. oh" Liz said as it dawned on her that Max would be there. "I know." She said, suddenly remembering that Sean spoke to him earlier. "Oh god."
"What? What's wrong Liz?"
"Um, nothing, I just remembered that I left the oven on and like, the meatloaf is going to overcook and become all burnt and crusty-like. I hate when that happens, you know?"
"Right." Alex said, "Anyway, I'll see you tomorrow."
I'm forced to walk upstairs and head to my room. I'm kind of like, afraid of what I may see in there. I'll take like, tentative steps to prolong the permanent scarring of my life. Wait, what am I thinking here? This is Sean and Isabel. First of all, Isabel is like, so with Kyle.. and second of all, Sean is just the epitome of dork. But I need to go in there and like, interrupt whatever they're doing to find out about Max.
Liz knocked on her door.
Wow, never before have I ever thought that I'd be knocking on my own bedroom door. This is odd, a very odd odd feeling. Hmm, and I'm not hearing a "come in" or anything.
Suddenly the door inched open and Sean poked his head out. Liz raised an eyebrow,
"What are you doing?"
"Shh." Sean said, putting his index finger in front of his lips to signify her to be quiet. "She fell asleep."
"She's asleep?" Liz asked. Sean nodded before stepping out of the room.
"I guess today really wore her out."
"Yeah." Liz said. "Umm, what I wanted to ask you about was Max."
"Oh, right. Max."
"Yeah, so...?" Liz let the sentence trail on.
"I'm going to be tutoring him." Sean said.
"What?" Liz said in surprise. "Really? He's like, okay with that?" Sean just nodded, unable to miss the smile developing on Liz's lips. She really did have it bad for Max.
"Thanks." Liz said.
"No problem, Parker." Sean said, looking around. "I guess I better go now."
"Okay." Liz followed him midway down the stairs and once he was out of sight she sat down on the steps bursting with giddiness in the knowledge that Max was finally getting help. She couldn't help but smile thinking of all the potential Max had.
Just as Sean stepped out of the house, Nancy stepped in.
"Hi Sean. How are you doing?" Nancy greeted him.
"I'm good, Mrs. Parker, how are you?"
"I'm fine, Sean. What are you doing here?"
"Oh, I was just leaving. I came to return Tess."
"Oh that's right, Liz left her at your house."
"Yeah." Sean said. "Well, see you later Mrs. Parker."
"Bye, Sean. Oh wait.." She said reaching into her purse for money.
"Oh no, that's okay Mrs. Parker, that's not necessary."
"No, I insist." Nancy replied. Digging around her purse for money.
"No really, I'm just glad that I could help."
"Well, would you like to at least come in for dinner?" Nancy asked.
"You know, could I take a rain check on that Mrs. Parker? I think my parents are expecting me."
"Alright." Nancy smiled, "Thanks, Sean."
Liz peered through the pillars of wood on the steps to see her mom.
Okay, my mom is delaying coming in. I can tell. She's all fidgety and trying to keep conversation with Sean. That's amusing. Well, she's going to have to face me and tell me what went on. My inquiring mind needs to like, know. Damn, I've been reading too much National Enquirer lately... I can't help it, it's addicting.
Liz sat on the steps and waited for the door to close before she stood up on the steps, ready to confront her mother.
"Liz?" Nancy said, putting a hand on her chest. "You startled me." Liz clamored down the steps,
"Sorry. So.. what happened earlier?"
"Well, Liz," Nancy looked around the room nervously, fidgeting, and Liz couldn't help but roll her eyes.
"Mom. Isabel is upstairs sleeping in the room formerly known as mine, Tess is upstairs in her room most likely listening to her pre-pubescant pop music, and well, in my humble opinion, I need to know what happened.
Okay, so now my mother is giving me that defeated, 'I've been through so much and I'm really tired' look. It's making me feel somewhat guilty, but at the moment, my brain is like, scattered with a bunch of different scenarios.
"Okay honey, let's find your father." Nancy said, holding onto Liz's shoulders and guiding her to the Crashdown. Jeff immediately looked up from the paperwork he was doing, taking off his glasses to fix Nancy with a knowing look.
"Liz, sit down."
They're speaking in that serious tone, so you know, it's like, not something to take lightly. I'm getting more and more creeped out by the second, and the fact that my parents are trying to prolong the inevitable is really not helping.
Liz sat down in a booth, while Jeff slid in across from her and Nancy stood, pacing around the table.
"Okay, Liz. This may come to a shook for you..." Nancy began.
No, really? I thought it was normal for glowing embers to suddenly emerge from my mom placing her hand on another human being's body.
Nancy took a deep breath. "Jeff, could you help me here?"
Jeff looked to Liz,
"Liz, honey, your mother is.. well, not of this earth."
Oh my god, this is like, THE funniest thing my parents ever pulled. Haha, not of this earth. They should have saved this one for Halloween to scare Tess. She would have believed it, the gullible child that she is. I can't help but laugh at the thought.
Liz burst out laughing, so forcefully that tears started to form in her eyes. She had to have been laughing for a good 5 minutes before she even noticed that her parents still had straight faces. She wiped at her tears with the sleeve of her flannel shirt before she looked at them questioningly.
"Liz, honey." Nancy slid into the booth beside her. "This isn't a joke." She grabbed the ketchup bottle and squirted ketchup all over the table.
Okay, is it some fetish for so-called 'aliens' to squirt ketchup on tables for no apparent reason. What is my mother trying to prove by this?
Nancy placed her hand inches above the gobby mess of red before a soft glow emmanated from her hand, taking the ketchup away.
Okay, now I'm a 'believer'. Oh my God. This is like, a dream right? Totally not possible. Aliens aren't real.. my own mother can't be one. Dude, I've been living on earth all these years and my parents keep something like this from me.
"Liz?" Nancy questioned worriedly at the look on her daughter's face.
Liz looked to her mother.
"How could you not tell me until now?" Liz asked, a look of pain marking her face. Nancy winced at the look.
"Liz, we've tried telling you and Tess, it was just, there was never a right way to do it. We didn't know how to tell you, and you found out.. so you know."
God, my head is throbbing. Wait a second, a thought just occured to me. My mother's an alien, does that make me..
"Am I an alien?" Liz asked, the words fluttering from her lips without a second thought.
"I don't know."
Okay, if THAT hasn't confused me...
"You see, I was adopted. It took me a long time to come to terms with my real heritage. I found out I was an.. alien on my own. Your father and Diane are the only ones who know, and now, so does Philip. I think that I'm half alien. What you would call an alien-hybrid. Half alien and half human. Your father.." Nancy gestured to Jeff, "Is completely human. Considering you're so good at science, take into consideration the whole genetics thing.."
"So I may or may not have these special powers that you have?" Liz asked. "Kind of like, you having green eyes and red hair, while I have the dominant brown hair and plain brown eyes from dad?"
"Right." Nancy sighed a sigh of relief.
"So... what did you do to Mr. Cherski?" Liz question, her mind still whirling with thoughts.
"I healed him."
"Could he have died?"
"I don't know." Nancy said quietly. "I've only ever healed wounded animals before, never a human."
"How do I know if I have these... these alien powers? Do all aliens have the power to 'heal'?"
Nancy gave Liz a long, thoughtful look, before answering,
"I honestly don't know." Liz nodded, an overwhelming amount of emotions clouding through her mind as the realization of what was happening dawned on her.
"Are there others?" Liz asked, her mind still a haze of questions.
"I would assume so. I haven't found any though, Liz. It would be dangerous if too many people knew about it."
I nod. All I can really do now is nod my head. I'm trying to understand this whole thing, it doesn't make sense to me. It doesn't sink it. It doesn't connect with my brain. I'm trying really hard, but I just.. I'm feeling tired. Weak. I'm feeling hurt, I'm feeling cheated out of something, I should have known sooner.
"Liz?" Nancy questioned quietly, tenatively, as if hoping Liz wouldn't be mad at her. The tone of her voice only made Liz's anger grow.
"What?" Liz snapped, her head flying to the side to look at her mother. A flash of pain etched in her mother's eyes.
"Has anything weird ever happened to you, or around you?" Nancy questioned.
"When you say 'weird', exactly what do you mean? Anything 'out of the ordinary'? Because frankly, if I'm an alien, it would have seemed natural to me if anything 'out of the ordinary' ever happened to me, so how would I know? Maybe if I knew sooner about my heritage, I'd know if something 'weird' happened to me.." Liz rambled on, her anger growing.
"Liz." Jeff's voice was strong and powerful, Liz had only once ever heard her father's tone like it was at that moment. Back when she was 8 and her and Tess were fighting in the house. Both blaming the other on the broken vase that fell from them running around.
Hmm, miraculously that vase was 'fixed', and I thought it was all due to the wonderful world of super glue.
"I don't want you to be talking that way to your mother. She has wanted to tell you before, but there was never a fitting time for it. She has been in pain for keeping this to herself for so long, you need to respect her. I don't want you to use that tone of voice with your mother."
Apparently, the tone of my voice was sarcastic, and my dad is yelling at me to go to my room. Too bad one Isabel Cherski is sleeping soundly on my very own bed, in my very own room full of my very own posters of bands that she probably hates.
"Isabel's kinda staying the night, if you remember dad."
Now I'm pulling the 'I'm smarter than you' trick with my dad, this always pisses parents off. They seem to hate it when you know more than they do. I can't help it, I'm pissed. I have a wonderful way of dealing with my anger.
Jeff stood, mouth agape.
"Liz, apologize to your mother right now." His eyes flashed in anger, and his voice lowered a notch, "otherwise you will not be aloud to go out tomorrow night with Maria and Alex."
Damn, he knows how to bribe me.
"I'm sorry, mom." Liz turned to her mother.
Wait, is she crying? I didn't want my mother to cry over this.
"Mom?" Liz inched closer to her mother, "I'm really sorry."
Yeah, that's me. Liz Parker, a regular comforter. I seem to be good at helping my friends in times of need, but it's just weird to try and console your mom. Usually it's her trying to console you. And now, I'm feeling guilty over my own stubborn selfishness. I can't help it though, it's a trait I get from my mother. It's like my 'in my humble opinion' saying. I can't help it, it's my mom's fault, and I wouldn't want it any other way. Now if only I could tell this to my mom, but I seem to have a hard time expressing my thoughts, so I'll just think them to myself.
Liz hugged her mom. Nancy seemed surprised, it had been so long since Liz had willingly hugged her, and Nancy's crying seized. Mother and daughter sat there, just hugging one another, and when they looked up to find Jeff, he was gone.
"I don't know about you.." Nancy began, "but I'm beat. This has been one hectic day."
Now all I want to do is curl up on the nice sofa and for Saturday to come quickly. I'll be able to get away from this whole mess at the concert. I'll get to see Maria sing and cheer her on and not have to worry about my mother being an alien, or whether or not I have those alien traits. Tomorrow, I get to escape.
*I hope that part made up for my lack of updatage. Just so you know, the next part will be the concert and it shall have some M/L interaction for all you dreamers. =) And hopefully, it won't take too long to get a new part out. Probably after a new part of TDMAN, we'll see how things go. Anyway, I'm in the mood to write again... so yeah.. enough of my horrible Michiganian rambling.. it's a curse I tell you!!**
|posted on 25-Aug-2002 3:24:07 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Wow, you guys are all so great. Hehe, forgive me for being unable to respond to each of you individually, but I'm kind of in a rush right now. I promise that when I get back I'll respond to all of you and your wonderful comments. =)|
Here's Part 10 (I've decided it'd be a good thing to label the parts from now on.. to save confusion. Lol)
It's so weird having Isabel here. I mean, she was my best friend for so long. We used to have so much in common and now it's like, we're completely different people. I'm not understanding anything she's doing right now, and back when we were 10, we used to be able to like, finish each other's sentences.
"So, are you like, friends with Sean now or something?" Liz asked Isabel as they both stood in front of her mirror. Isabel adorned herself with foundation, red lipstick and mascara while Liz just used chapstick on her lips.
"Well, yeah. He's coming over again tonight." Isabel said nonchalantly. Liz raised a brow,
"Uh huh." Isabel said before smacking her lips together.
"You're with Kyle, aren't you?" Isabel nodded,
"Why do you ask?"
I don't understand this. If she's with Kyle and supposedly loves him or whatever.. then why is Sean coming over tonight and why is she getting all like.. spiffed up for him?
"No reason". Isabel shrugged,
"I don't get you, Liz." Surprised, Liz snapped her face to look at Isabel's.
"You're like, going out tonight to this concert thing, right?" Liz nodded, "Okay.. and you're dressed in jeans, a black tank top and a red flannel shirt. Don't you know how to dress up?"
How ironic is this? Isabel is staying home and she's more decked out than I am.
"Well, you're staying home and you have more make-up on than a one legged prostitute." Liz voiced her thoughts. Isabel only scoffed at her.
"You're so different now."
I'm different? I'M DIFFERENT? She's the one who became some cheerleader and started enjoying school projects. Come on, she's little miss perfect teen. She's every parent's wish. I'm just me.. I can't be a peppy girl who gets straight A's all the time. I like my music, I like my clothes, I like my friends... besides, the last time I got dressed up for something I was stood up... and do I really want to go through all that meaningless expectation for nothing again?
"Whatever." Liz said before leaving the room. She didn't want to stay there, she couldn't deal with Isabel right now. If they had any more of a conversation, she was afraid she'd just blow up at Is and she didn't want to do that.
As Liz bounded down the stairs she heard the doorbell ring.
Okay, behind that door can either be one of two things. Either Alex is there ready to pick me up for the concert, or Sean is here ready to go and do whatever he does with Isabel. God, that thought alone makes me shudder.
Liz answered the door and forced a smile on her lips.
Maybe I was wrong. Alex AND Sean are both here. My life is so completely weird.
"Hey there, girlfriend." Alex chided, walking into her house. "I was on my way here and I saw Sean outside your door pacing back and forth." Sean walked in, fixing Alex with a glare.
"I was not pacing.." Sean tried to explain himself, but Alex continued on..
"So I had to take it upon myself to ask this dear young boy why in the world he was pacing. You know me and my curiosity, Liz." Alex grinned at his friend. "And he told me that he was invited over by one Isabel Cherski." Liz couldn't help but smile as she saw a hint of crimson splash Sean's face.
"She asked me to come here, okay?" Sean's voice sounded irritable.
"Ouch." Alex said, "Someone has their undies in a twist."
This is why I love Alex.
Liz burst out laughing, a genuine smile lighting up her face.
"I love you, Alex." She said between her laughter. "Come on, let's go." Liz turned outside the door and walked briskly to Alex's car.
"In a hurry, hon?" Alex asked.
"You have no idea."
"Tell uncle Alex what's wrong." Liz smiled at Alex's light-hearted way of soothing her.
"Nothing. Everything's just weird. This whole thing with Isabel is really taking a lot out of me.. and then my mom is just like.. totally.."
God, as much as I love Alex, I can't tell him about my mother being an alien. It's so weird to even think. I don't even know about myself. Besides, this is about forgetting what's going on in my life. I'm supposed to have fun at this concert.."
"Do you even realize how excited Maria is about tonight?" Alex asked.
"Oh, definitely. She's actually giddy with excitement. It's like singing is more important to her than anything else in the world."
"You've got that right, sister."
Liz and Alex entered the small club packed with people decked out in grunge clothing. Liz smiled as she looked around to see people who were so laid back and didn't even seem to care about what anyone else thought of them.
"Looking for a certain somebody?" Alex chided.
"Alex, for once I am not thinking about Max Evans. I can enjoy myself for one moment without thinking about him." Liz answered. Alex fixed her with a knowing look, raising his eyebrows at her last statement. Liz rolled her eyes.
How does Alex seem to know me so well? It's like.. he's reading my subconscious thoughts... maybe he's an alien too. Wow, look at me, I'm so pathetic, I'm going to start going around thinking everybody is an alien.
"Hey, look, there's Maria. Come on." Alex grabbed Liz's hand and dragged her through the smokey club, all the while yelling "Maria, Maria" in a sing-song voice.
"Alex, I think you've been watching West Side Story way too many times." Liz said.
Maria turned around, a very large grin on her face.
"Hey! You guys made it!" she shouted above the speakers. "I am like, so nervous, yet so exhilerated at the same time." Maria reached into her purse and just when Liz thought she'd be pulling out her bottle of alcohol, she saw a small vile and smirked.
"You know me so well, chica." Maria took a nice, long whiff before putting it back in her purse.
And then me and Maria look at eachother, and we smile. It's like, one of those smiles that just says so much more, you know? It's like, the ultimate friendship smile. It's me telling her that I'm here to support her and it's her thanking me for being here for her. Well, either that, or it's in my imagination.
Maria looked around, watching as the Frozen Embryos started tuning up for their performance.
"Okay, gotta go. Wish me luck, not like I'll need it." She winked before disappearing through the crowd of people packed together.
Liz watched Maria, unable to miss her attire. Decked out in a long flowing hippie-like dress, Maria just stood out no matter what, and as her gaze followed Maria climbing up the steps to the stage, her eyes locked in on Max Evans.
God, he's so hot. There should be some kind of rule that doesn't allow a person to be that beautiful. And what is it about a guy with a guitar that just makes him ten times hotter than the average male? Some things, I will never know.
"I knew it!" Alex smirked, "You can't hide your true feelings from me, Lizzie." Liz stuck her tongue out at Alex, and the two shouted as they saw Maria fixing up the microphone.
I so love concerts. It's like, this rush of adrenaline that just surges through your body, and then you look around and you see all these people who are there that are just like you. They just want to be able to get away from the events of every day life and drown themselves in music... They just want to... escape.
"Go Maria!" Alex shouted, cheering on his best friend. Liz smiled and watched as Maria started swaying her body to the alternative music booming throughout the club.
It's times like this when I envy Maria. I wish I could do what she does... not necessarily sing in front of like, 100 people because well, my voice sucks... but to be able to be in the spotlight and just not care that people are watching you. I mean, if I got up on stage, there's no way that I would start dancing, I would just feel so.. completely dorky. But when Maria dances around, it's just so her, she's letting loose and having fun.
"What can ya say?" Alex smiled, "She's a natural."
"Yeah. She is."
Maria winked at the audience before beginning the song, surprising Liz and Alex as the first lyrics escaped her mouth..
"I can feel it coming in the air tonight... hold on.
I've been waiting for this moment for all my life... hold on..."
"Oh my God, she's singing Phil Collins." Alex laughed, "I thought she was gonna sing that Ramones song."
"Well, everyone seems to be enjoying this alternative version, and besides, you know Maria. She's constantly changing her mind about things." Liz suggested.
"Trust Maria to do things... different."
"Can you feel it coming in the air tonight.... hold on.. hold on..
Well if you told me you were drowning
I would not lend a hand.."
God her voice is beautiful, and this song is so perfect for her. It's almost... haunting.
"I've seen your face before my friend
But I don't know if you know who I am
Well I was there and I saw what you did
Saw it with my own two eyes
So you can wipe off that grin
I know where you've been
It's all been a pack of lies..
I can't seem to take my eyes away from the stage.. and gradually they somehow find Max Evans so focused on the music. He's closing his eyes as his fingers are all over the strings of his guitar... and I'm wondering if he could ever care as much about me.. as the way he does about his music.
I can feel it coming in the air tonight, hold on.
I've been waiting for this moment
For all my life.. hold on.... hold on..
Well I remember, I remember don't worry
How could I ever forget
It was the first time
The last time we ever met
And then, this amazing thing happens... Max suddenly opens his eyes and they lock in on mine. I feel this rush of ... emotions flowing through my body and I feel like I'm glowing.. and I don't know if he feels it too... but I sense that he could... he doesn't smile the way I'm doing right now, and all I see is the darkness in his eyes...
But I know the reason why you keep this silence up
No you don't fool me,
Well the hurt doesn't show
But the pain still grows
It's no stranger to you and me...
I can feel it coming in the air tonight.. hold on... hold on.."
Cat calls and clapping emmanated throughout the small, intimate club as Maria took a bow, her large grin evident on her full luscious lips. She silently mouthed a 'thank you' to the Liz and Alex before disappearing off the stage.
"Come on, let's find her, maybe she's in the back or something." Alex suggested.
"Okay.." Liz's eyes snapped away from Max and she followed Alex.
"Maria!" Both Alex and Liz shouted as they spotted her blonde, pixie-like hair and large dangling earrings in view. Maria turned around, her face breaking out into a huge smile as she ran to her friends who immediately threw their arms around her and hugged her.
"Oh my God, that was THE best thing I have ever done!"
"Even better than sex?" Alex raised a skeptical brow.
"Okay.. well, the second best thing..." Maria started, "No, it WAS better than sex... well, okay, it was like, the equivalent of sex."
"So glad you came to a solid decission." Liz joked. "Seriously Maria, you were fantastic up there. You were like, born to perform."
"Can I be your manager?" Alex asked. Maria and Liz looked at eachother and burst into laughter. "What, I would be one kick ass manager."
"Sure you would, Alex." Liz said, patting his head. "So, Maria, aren't you going to like, sing any more songs?"
"No, actually.." Maria rolled her eyes, "Michael got me the gig, but your little lover boy Max was all skeptical about MY singing. He didn't know if it would go over well with the crowd, so Michael convinced him to let me do at least one song and... well, if the crowd liked it, I could come back next time they perform and do a whole set." Maria squeled with joy.
"Well, by the way it sounds, you are so going to be performing up there all night long, girlfriend." Alex said, bringing Maria in for another hug.
"Well, there was really no doubt in my mind." Maria said, nonchalantly brushing off the compliment. She turned to Liz. "Well, your lover boy is in back." She winked. Liz fixed Maria with the defeated, puppy-dog look.
"Do you and Alex have some sort of telepathic conspiratorial... like, thing out for me. You both keep mentioning HIM to me all the time. Maybe I don't want to always know where HE is.. I mean, HE is just a guy.." Liz began.
"Liz, chica, if HE wasn't so important to you then why aren't you using HIS actual name?" Maria broke in.
Well, she's got me there.
"See, it's best not to hide your feelings from us, Lizzie, because Maria and me.. we know all." Alex said, "Now go talk to him, girl."
"Alright, alright. I will, if you guys just stop like, pressuring me to do this."
"Oh come on, Liz, peer pressure is so the thing to do now." Maria joked.
"You are so weird, Maria."
"Tell her something she doesn't know." Alex joined in. He grabbed Liz by the shoulders and turned her around. "Now go get him. We'll be your support group."
"You expect me to just walk off in the back like I'm with the band and just start chatting up a storm with him or something?" Liz asked.
"Liz, Liz, Liz." Maria scolded, "Watch and learn." She grabbed Liz's hand and started dragging her off..
Oh my God
"Hey Max." Maria said as she and Liz came into view. Liz tried to hide inconspicuously behind Maria, but Maria tugged on her arm and suddenly thrust Liz forward to come face to face with Max Evans.
"Hi." Liz said, turning to fix a quick glare at Maria, who only grinned in response.
"He went in the crowd somehwere." Max said.
"Wow, thanks for the help." Maria's sarcasm filtered through before she left the room.
Wow, what a great friend. Leaving me here to fend for myself, what happened to my support group? Now I'm supposed to think of something witty to say..
Wow, there's witty for you. Let's see how many variations of hi I can actually say.
At least he's responding this time...
"So..." Liz started, looking down at her suddenly very amusing sneakers. "Umm.. I.."
"You told Shane."
"Shane?" Liz asked..
"That I couldn't...that I have trouble with.."
"Oh.. yeah." Liz said as it dawned on her that Shane must have been Sean. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that, but I just wanted to.. help." She lifted her head to give him a comforting smile, only to find his beautiful amber eyes locked intently on hers, with his eyebrows furrowed in question.
"I told you.. I wanted to help you."
"No, why do you want to.. help me?" Max asked.
Because I am heavily infatuated with you, you big idiot, you.
Max's deep gaze focused lower on Liz's face.
Oh god, is he going to kiss me again? Please, please kiss me.. and then tell me you love me and you've secretly always loved me and that you want my hot, sexy.. or lack-there-of, body all to yourself like I want yours.
Max's face suddenly inched closer to Liz's and just as she closed her eyes, ready to feel his lips on hers, she heard his voice..
Snapping her eyes open, she nodded, turning her now crimson face away from him.
Okay, that's it. I've told him off before.. and I can do it again. He's not going to play these stupid games with me anymore...
"Why won't you.. uh." Liz started. "Well, why did you umm, why won't you like.."
God, why is it so much harder now?
"Look Liz, I can't make a commitment right now."
"Wow, commitment, you used a big word." Liz suddenly bit back, her sarcasm oozing out of her voice.
Max looked down, obviously hurt by her statement. Liz sighed, feeling slightly guilty.
"You were with Courtney." The words flew from her mouth before she had time to bite back her tongue.
God, I should just like, hit myself.... repeatedly... with a nine iron..
"That wasn't.. it wasn't.. it's not like this."
"Yeah? And what do you call this?" Liz asked, her arms flailing around.
Excuse me for being a woman.
"Because I won't just put out for you without pretense?"
Max shook his head.
"No.. it's.. I can't get into this."
"And you call me complicated." Liz shot out. The room was suddenly filled with silence, the only thing heard were the sounds of bitter breathing. After the long pause and thick tension wafting through the air, Max spoke
"Just tell Shane he doesn't have to tutor me... it's too late now."
"What?" Liz looked up at him, her mouth agape.
"It's nice that you care and all, but I can't... I'm not.. I'm not smart, okay?" Max looked down self-consciously.
And suddenly I feel my heart do excrutiatingly painful flops, and his big ears are all red, and his eyes aren't even looking into mine right now.. and he's not talking.. but I think he's just revealed the most he's ever revealed to me before.
Liz took tentative steps closer to Max before gently laying her small hand on his shoulder.
"Max, look at me."
Max turned his face up, that cool, calm and collective mask back on. That unreadable, mysterious and oh so sexy look that just made her heart skip a beat... a non-painful one.
And for a moment I forget that he was just so open with me... but then I remember when his eyes briefly flash with this tinge of golden.
"You are not stupid, Max. You just never tried." Liz said, her brown pools staring deeply into his amber depths.
"Let's just.. forget about it."
"Max, Sean is going to tutor you, and you are going to learn how to read.. and you are going to start participating in English class and you are going to realize just how brilliant you actually are."
Oh God, look at me. I sound like a total moron. Maybe I've found my calling.. move over Matt Foley, here comes Liz Parker: Motivational Speaker Extroadinaire.
Max's lips suddenly turned in the slightest hint of a smile, but then disappeared before Liz had time to analyze it's full meaning.
"Sorry... I sound like..a.." Liz shook her head, shyly covering her face with her hand.
Max reached his arm out, and gently grabbed a hold of her hand, bringing it down to her side.
His eyes are dark again... and his lips look so appealing right now...
Before Liz knew what was happening, his lips were on hers. Her surprise lasted a millisecond before she seized the moment and tentatively opened her mouth. His tongue snaked in through her lips and captured hers.
And now all I can do is feel. God, he tastes so good... and what he's doing with his tongue.. I've lost all rational thought....
Max's hand pushed Liz's long silky hair to the side of her neck while his mouth descended to the opposite side, his tongue immediately darting out, sampling her creamy collarbone. He slowly inched her flannel shirt down past her shoulder, placing scorching hot kisses along her arm and trailing back up to her neck with Liz's gasps of pleasure urging him on...
And then it happens... again. Stars... millions and billions of stars flash before my eyes...
Max's lips returned to hers, capturing her bottom lip between his teeth and nipping lightly before melding his tongue deep within her mouth to duel with her own.
Max... is lost. He's a little boy all by himself with no one around... he sees me.. with Isabel... he sees us.. He picks up a guitar... he doesn't feel so alone... He befriends Michael... He's watching me again... He's kissing Courtney... but he's not feeling anything.. he's numb.. he's watching me again and he's...
Max's mouth ripped away from their searing kiss, and she pulled back, gasping for much needed-air as her brain processed what just happened.
Did I imagine it? Was it in my subconscious.. or did I? Is this something that happens to me because I'm an alien... oh God... I've never kissed anyone before... how would I know? God, me and my stupid innocence...
"I'm.." Both said at the same time, eyes vehemently scanning the room, desperate for something to save them from explanation...
And just as I hoped... my savior came in.
"Liz!" Alex shouted, his eyes bugged out when he saw her flushed face and shirt halfway off, revealing her black tank top. "Sorry, I didn't mean to.."
"No.. it's, it's okay. I was just about to leave anyway." Liz said, looking anywhere but at Alex or Max.
"Liz?" Maria came up behind Alex, and once she saw Max and Liz with guilty looks on their faces, she nudged Alex in the ribs. "I think we interrupted something." She whispered to him none too lightly.
Oh god.. support group. Support group.
Liz bounced up, feeling the fabric of her shirt along her arm.. she looked over herself and quickly pulled the sleeve back up. Liz cleared her throat,
"Umm.. see you at school.." She muttered to Max before quickly exiting out of the room between Alex and Maria, leaving the two stunned in her wake.
Maria was immediately on her toes. She looked to Max, raising an eyebrow, her green eyes piercing his.
"You better not have hurt her." She demanded.
"I... I didn't..."
Maria gave him a death-glare before retreating after Liz, leaving Alex alone with Max.
"Umm... wow, this is a little awkward, huh?" Alex said, trying to lighten the mood.
"Okay... I.. trust you didn't, hurt her.. You wouldn't, hurt her, would you?" Alex asked. Max shook his head, and Alex nodded before leaving.
I should have convinced Maria to leave with Michael. She's hounding me with a million questions while poor Alex concentrates on driving through her loud shrieking.
"Are you sure you're all right? He didn't do anything you didn't want him to do, right?" Maria's tone changed to a soft questioning.
"I'm sure, Maria."
"Okay, if anyone ever hurts you chica, they have me and Alex to answer to."
"Thanks." Liz's lips turned into a smile. Maria reached over and hugged her.
Sometimes I wonder why Maria seems so protective over me and my virtue.. Alex seems to know that this is a normal thing. Then again, Maria and Alex have been friends long before I even joined the picture.. Maybe there was something in her past that triggered it.. like Max's past that lead him to be so aloof.. oh God, here I go analyzing people. Maybe those images were in my imagination. Maybe they're not REAL. But they felt real, it seemed totally plausible. God, my mind is so jumbled right now.
"Earth to Lizzie." Alex's voice interruped Liz from her thoughts.
"What? Oh." Liz said as she saw Alex pulling into her driveway.
"You zoned out there for a minute." Maria said, "Are you gonna be there for my next performance? Michael said in two weeks they'll be performing again with yours truly as the lead singer."
"Of course I'll be there, Maria."
"Great. Goodnight, chica." Maria hugged Liz once again before Liz got out of the car.
"Thanks for the ride, Alex."
"Liz, hon, no more thanking me... we're friends, and I was born to drive." Alex said. Liz reached in through his window and hugged him. "Thank..." She caught herself, "See ya, Alex".
"Love you guys." Liz said before ending her so-called night of 'escape'.
I thought I wouldn't be thinking about this whole alien thing. I thought I wouldn't be thinking about Isabel... or her father... Is there any way that I'll be completely free of this whole crazy thing?
Liz walked into her house, twisting her suddenly stiff neck. Her eyes bulged open once she saw the scene splayed before her. There on the couch before her sat Isabel and Sean. Isabel's head was draped over Sean's shoulder, and Liz had to keep herself from puking. She tried to discreetely inch her way through the house past the two, but then she heard sniffling.
Liz turned around, only to see Isabel in the arms of an awkward Sean, his hand stiffly patting her back in an attempt to soothe her.
Would I be completely heartless to laugh right now?
Isabel's sniffling grew louder and Liz immediately felt guilty for her recent thoughts. Sean looked up at Liz pleadingly, obviously not knowing what to do, and then Isabel looked up into Liz's eyes. Liz opened her mouth to talk, but Isabel immediately brushed away her tears with her fingers.
God, Isabel. Why can't she just... talk to me. I think I now realize that all those moments I was disgusted with Sean coming over to help Isabel wasn't because the thought was sickening... but because I was jealous...
Sean gave Liz an apologetic look.
Because Isabel can confide in Sean, of all people, and not me.
|posted on 25-Aug-2002 8:55:16 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Mwah haha... yes, tis I.. I'm backith..|
Already? Yeah, with a response to your lovely FB. Hehe.
Thank you so much roswellluver, Katalina and PrincessStacey. =)
mpls muse~ Hehe. I love surprising people when they're reading.
Rapunzel~ You shall find out about Liz being an alien within time.. although it's kind of weird me saying that now as a response to your earlier FB considering if you read this FB before you read the next chapter well.. blah, I'm sure you can guess about Liz. Lol
JaneLane~ Glad to have shocked you. =)
Nikkisue~ Thanks for the FB and I LOOOOVE your icon. Lady and The Tramp is my all time favorite Disney movie. What can I say? I love animals, especially doggies! ^_^
b4echstarrynite~ Aww, I want you to know that your FB really inspired me to FINISH writing that last part, thank you so much. =)
LixMix5~ Thanks for all those bumps! Made me all happy.
m14~ Glad you liked the "support group". Lol, and your continuous bumps also inspired me to FINISH writing that last part. Lol.
Kitcat26~ As always, your comments make me blush. Lol. And yeah, I've lost some friends. I know there a lot that I would feel awkward talking to. I'm glad you can relate to some of this.. hehe, and glad you noticed the Blind Date Maria song thing. =) T'was my intention. Hehe, very good insight, glad I confused you. Mwah haha... is Max an alien? Is Liz an alien? Are they both aliens or is only one an alien? Did Max get flashes or was it just Liz? *Insert suspenseful music hither.* Hehe. Ugh.. and don't get me started on time.
Meagzie~ Lol. Yes, guys with guitars are oh so sexeh.. Lol. Glad you like and can relate to Liz. =) She's quite the sarcastic one, huh? Hehe. And I know I've been guilty of lack of FB for people, don't worry, tis all good. ~*~
|posted on 7-Nov-2002 3:34:59 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Hey everybody.. umm.. long time no fic, huh? =/ Yeah... been busy lately and whatnot.. and even this next part I kinda rushed on. So please excuse the errors, and like, I promise it'll get better.. but yeah, I'll just shut up now.|
Thanks roswellluver, Jane, mg_ros, PrincessStacey, Elc, Rapunzel, Stardust Dreamer, Lizzie_Parker17, and liz1490! I love getting comments. Hehe.
Kitcat26~ Hehe. As usual, I love your replies. Yeah, I"ve had that happen with friends and fallouts and yeah, it sucks hardcore. Thanks for all the lovely comments. Always makes me happy. =)
m14~ Thanks. Glad you enjoyed that last part, the next part contains no M/L interaction but um.. read it anyway? Lol. Kidding.
Meagzie~ I love you lots. =) Lol.
mpls_muse~ Yaya! You're being perceptive with Max and Liz. =) And glad you think the whole Liz and Is relationship is pretty believable.
LixMix5~ Hell yeah, you've boosted my ego. Lol, but seriously, those bands do rock the house down, yo. You're so nifteh.. we would be hanging out chillin like villains if we lived in the same proximity. Heh. It'd be fun.
abarfeld~ I'll probably incorporate that whole make-out think eventually. ;)
b4echsterrynite~ Thanks for all the suggestions, I may use that writing a section on Sean and Max idea, it sounds good to me. Hehe, and thanks for all those incessant bumps and that bmail.
TD DreamerBehr~ I'm glad you found your way back to this fic and that you still enjoy it. =) Thanks..
And now.. Part 11
Liz woke up stiff and even more tired than she was when she went to bed. Getting a total of 1 hour of sleep through her tossing, turning and analyzing, she felt completely miserable. She threw the blanket off the couch and sat up, running her hand through her hair. She looked up the stairway and wondered how Isabel was doing.
We may be completely different now, but it doesn't mean that I don't care about her. I wish she would just open up to me again, like when we were little before everything got so complicated and we changed.
Liz stood up, walking to the kitchen and spotted her mother making coffee.
"Morning, honey." Nancy smiled.
"Morning." Liz replied none too happily.
"How was the concert?"
"It was okay." Liz said, completely preoccupied with her thoughts of Isabel. "Mom?" Liz asked, looking up. "Were you ever scared?" Nancy raised an eyebrow in question. "You know, about what you are.. an alien?" The question was her subconscious talking, suddenly voicing itself when she opened her mouth.
"Not really scared. Just alone most of the time." Nancy's eyes lowered, and there was a solitary moment before she raised her eyes to Liz again and smiled. "I got over it when I met your father though. Well, and of course, Diane was always supportive. She helped me though highschool, hell, she was the reason I became so well-liked." Nancy smiled at the memories. "It's so weird how we both happened to have daughters at the same time, too.. and how you both turned out to be best friends.."
"Used to be.. best friends." Liz corrected, looking down in guilt. "Did you and Mrs. Cherski ever, like, I don't know, drift apart?"
"Well, there was one time when we were both fighting over a guy. It was really stupid and pointless. He turned out to be a jerk, and we both decided that no guy would ever come between us again." Nancy stated. "You know, Lizzie, as much as Isabel puts up this front, I think she needs you right now."
Liz shook her head. "She doesn't need me."
"What makes you think that?"
"She just doesn't, mom." Liz's tone let Nancy know she shouldn't continue to prod. She stood up, picking up her coffee cup and going back to the machine to refill it.
This whole talk hasn't helped me any. It's good that Sean was there for her. Really, it is. At least she has someone to confide in. I just kind of wish that it was me again. Like it used to be.
"Mom?" Liz's thoughts suddenly returned to Max, and again, her subconscious seemed to speak something she'd normally never find herself telling her mother.
"When you make-ou" Liz caught herself, and corrected.. "I mean, kiss..dad.."
Eeew.. bad mental picture..
"Do you ever get like, images or anything from being an alien?" Nancy dropped her coffee cup, caught off guard at the question. All she seemed to hear was make-out. Was Liz starting to get serious with a guy? And what guy? Why didn't she ever meet this guy that was starting to make her daughter get this giddy look on her face half the time and troubled look the next? "Mom? You okay?"
"OhyeahsureI'mfine." Nancy said a little too quickly as she bent down to pick up the pieces of her broken cup. Liz went and got paper towels to help. Both were crouched down on the kitchen floor, and Liz watched as her mother as she started acting weird. "Has it, mom?"
"Liz, did you kiss someone?" Liz's face turned red.
Heh.. kissing seems a little understated...
"Liz!" Nancy shouted when she saw a smirk on her daughter's face.
"Liz, answer my question." Nancy demanded.
"Mom, answer mine!" Liz replied with a sarcastic arch of her eyebrow.
Why is my mom freaking out so much? You'd think she's one of those over-protective mothers who can't cope with her daughter growing up and dating boys..wait a second.
Liz studied her mother's contemplative features, and couldn't help but start to laugh.
She already is one..
"Elizabeth Ann Parker, why are you laughing?"
"You're... so funny, mom." Liz managed to voice.
"Geez mom, it was just a kiss, not like we mauled each other." Nancy's mouth opened at her daughter's bluntness. She looked at Liz, speechless, watching her laugh harder.. and after thinking about it for a while, her tension seized and she started to laugh herself.
"It is kind of funny, isn't it?" Nancy asked. Liz could only nod her head.
"I'm.. I'm over here worried that I'm an alien by getting flashes from kissing a guy, and you're worried ab.."
"You got flashes?" Nancy asked.
Hello mom, didn't you hear me the first time?
"Yeeeaaaah." Liz drew out the answer slowly, while nodding her head so her mom could fully understand.
"That's... weird." Nancy's voice spoke in wonder.
"What? It never happened to you?"
"Oh...." The two sat quietly, listening as the coffee continued dripping in the machine. "Well, maybe it was just my imagination.. or something." Liz said.
I'm shutting up now. It probably was my imagination. So totally my imagination, I'm just a completely imaginative person. I did not really see into Max Evan's.. soul. I saw what I thought he'd been through. And it was all in my imagination. Eeew.. I just told my mother I kissed a guy for no apparent reason. And now, she's gonna be paranoid.
Liz and her mother sat in awkward silence.
For normal girls to tell their mother's about kissing a boy, it's not a big deal.. but for me.. well, to put it easily.. my mother gave me my sex talk when I was 12, and neither one of us has recovered since then..
Liz was shaken from her thoughts when she saw Isabel walk into the kitchen in her pink silk pajamas.
"Good morning, Isabel." Nancy smiled, "Want some coffee?"
"Thanks." Isabel said, pulling out a chair and sitting down at the table, looking anywhere but at Liz.
Why is this only making me feel guiltier?"
"Your father should be out soon." Nancy spoke to ease the silence wafting through the kitchen. "He's doing just fine. You going to visit him today?" Isabel nodded, a small smile forming on her lips. "Good." Nancy smiled back.
Liz, knowing that she wasn't wanted, left the kitchen.
There's something about Sundays that makes you want to kill yourself. They're so long and dull and.. boring. And all it does is make you anticipate how Monday is coming up, and how another hellish week of school is going to happen where you're going to have to face... everyone.
Liz and Isabel had been avoiding each other all day long, and the only time Liz felt comfortable in her own home was when Is left to visit her father. Nancy and Jeff asked if Liz wanted to go with them and Tess, but she jumped at the chance of having the house to herself. She desperately needed time alone in her own house, without worrying about Isabel's clear avoidance from her or her mother's awkward glances thrown her way.
Just as she was about to crank up music to help ease her mind the doorbell rang.
Why does this have to happen at the worst times?
She walked over to the door and opening it, noticed Sean at the door. She fixed him with a dark glaze, pissed off that he interrupted her cherished time of listening to music.
"Isabel's not here." Liz cut him off.
"No, it's not about Is.. I mean, well it is. But she's not who I wanted to talk to. I want to talk to you."
"Oookay.." Liz said, getting annoyed at Sean's way of blubbering.
"I know that you're probably, you know, upset that she's like, talking to me. I don't even understand why she picked me to like, tell her feelings to but.. I mean, you're a better friend than I am with her. She just, we're not even friends.. I was just there."
For some reason, this is making me want to laugh.. but in this weird way, it's kind of making me realize something.
Sean noticed Liz's features ease, and a somewhat content look take over her face.
"No." She said.
"I think that in some..weird way she needed you. And I'm glad that you were there for her. I'm glad somebody was there for her. And thanks.. for being there for her."
And for the millionth time, Sean was amazed with Liz. He couldn't understand the way her mind worked, one minute she was pissed off, the next she was fine. He smiled awkwardly,
"I just wanted you to know." He said, turning towards the door, and before leaving his last words were "She does need you."
And those words left Liz with even more to think about.
Everyone returned with smiles on their faces.
"He's gonna be released on Monday." Nancy announced.
"That's great!" Liz's enthusiasm shown, not fake, but real. Her happiness for Isabel showing, her care for her and her family. She smiled at Isabel, only realizing that Isabel's smile was fake. She rememebered when Isabel was really smiling, or when something was bothering her.
Sometimes, it's like no matter how far you drift apart, there are still things that remain the same.
"I'm really tired. I'm gonna get some sleep." Isabel announced before walking up the stairs.
It didn't take Liz long this time to decide what to do. She took tentative steps into her room, the room that used to be her and Isabel's sanctuary.
"Hey.." Liz said.
"Hi." Was the meager reply. Isabel sat on Liz's bed, her legs pulled up with her chin resting on them. And for some reason, she let go. She started crying, and Liz couldn't think of anything to say to make it better. "Why weren't you there for me?" Isabel's words were spoken through her tears.
"Oh, Izzy.." Liz called her by her childhood name. "I wanted too.. but I thought you didn't need me."
"I needed you most of all." And Liz couldn't keep her tears back any longer as she made her way to her bed and grabbed Isabel's hand.
Just like before.. that day long ago when Isabel got her tonsils pulled out.
"What are you doing?" Isabel sniffled.
"Squeeze my hand as much as it hurts." Liz said, and the next thing she new Isabel was pulling her into a fierce hug.
Like I said, some things remain the same. You never forget them. This moment here reminds me of that saying, about friends leaving footprints on your hearts. However corny it may sound, it's oddly true. I guess you'd have to experience it to realize it though.. Like with everything. You never know until you deal with it. Then it's a learning process.. and eventually, you wake up. You wake up.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 11-Nov-2002 2:18:36 PM ]
|posted on 2-Jan-2003 9:26:11 PM by Wench On A Leash|
|Wow.. look, it's me. I'm back. And I realized.. it has been a really long time since my last update. =/ You guys probably expected that though. I've been busy lately with work and school... and DUDE, I actually got the whole box set of My So-Called Life. ALL 19 EPISODES! Sorry, it made me all happy. So expect more of a MSCL vibish thing again.. but it will not EXACTLY follow the whole show. I'm still attempting to mix the personalities of the Roswell characters with the MSCL ones.. and I'll obviously throw some alien-ish twists along the way.. anyway.. after my rambling, I need to say my thanks. =)|
roswellluver, mg_ros, Elc and Rapunzel.. thank you all for such wonderful FB. =) I'm just bounding with happiness.
b4echstarrynite~ Thank you for the bump and the concern. I'm glad you liked my last aprt. Sorry it took me so long to get out a new one. =/
Stardust Dreamer~ Ha! See! I told you I'd have an update soon! Anyway, I'll be playing on that whole jealousy issue with Maria and Isabel. =) Glad you enjoyed the last part.
m14~ Oooh, thanks on the whole mixing personalities together comment. That is extremely hard to do, especially with the Max/Jordan character. I mean, in retrospect Jordan was kind of an asshole =/ But I have an idea to mix in Jordan's personality with Max's.. it'll just take a while.. and yeah.. slowly but surely.. and I need to stop typing before I tell you my plan. Anyway.. uh, thanks for the FB. =)
Cath~ As you know, I always LOVE getting FB from you. Your last FB completely boosted my ego up a notch. You have a knack for doing that though. You must be in AP English, with your whole "rambling must have a beginning, middle and end", reminds me of all my English teachers ramming into my brain how essays must have 3 main paragraphs. =) Anyway, back on the topic at hand. I understand the stressfulness.. and the evil teachers aspect. Although nothing is more scary than seeing a teacher you dislike at Frederick's of Hollywood of all places, although it does make for good blackmail. >=D Who, me? Blackmail a teacher? Never. Mwah haha
Okay, like I said, back on topic. I have no idea who Sarah Dessen is, but for you to compare me to an author you seem to adore so much is REALLY AMAZING. Ahh, it makes me all happy with like.. special thoughts or something. And I always love getting quoted. It's all like "Awww, she found a part of my story all touching".. and yeah.. Okay, see, I'm rambling now.. and I better just post the new part before my rambling ends up longer than my actual chapter.. Okay.. here we go.
I appologize in advance for oddness in the fic. I don't know if it measures up well in accordance to the last part.. but hey, I'll give it a shot. Besides you all deserve a new part. I'm such a slacker.
"Hmm.." Liz turned in her bed, cuddling with her pillow.
"Maax.." Liz's incoherent voice mumbled in her sleepy state. Tess had to cover her mouth from giggling.
"Ahhh!" Liz's head shot up.. "God, Tess. What the hell? I'm trying to sleep." Liz said while wiping the sleep from her eyes. After her blurry eyes came into focus, she noticed the time on her clock.. "Oh sh.."
"Who's Max?" Tess asked.
"Nobody." Liz replied dryly. "Leave my room now so I can get ready with the mere minutes I have left."
"Don't I get a thanks for waking you up?" Tess asked.
"Umm.. like how about no."
Tess stuck her tongue out at Liz before walking over to the door and just standing there staring at her.
"Well, what are you waiting for? Go!" Liz was losing her patience fast.
"Max and Lizzie sitting in a tree. K I S S I N G.."
"You little brat!" Liz yelled, immediately jumping out of bed and rushing at Tess.
Tess ran downstairs, with Liz following closely behind. "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU. YOU ARE SO DEAD!"
"MOM! LIZ IS TRYING TO KILL ME!" Tess shouted as she ran into the kitchen and Liz grabbed her shirt.
"Ha, I got you!"
"Liz!" Nancy yelled when she got a glimpse of Liz clad in her flannel pajamas. Liz let go of Tess,
"Oh come on, she started it."
"Why aren't you ready?"
Liz glanced down at her pajamas and looked back to her mom, her eyes bulging out in surprised remembrance.
In no time Liz was running back upstairs, all the while yelling the ways she was going to kill Tess when she got home from school.
Okay, so despite my overly hectic, fast-paced morning, I was able to squeeze in a shower and get ready in just 15 minutes. Isn't that amazing? I should get like, an award for being ready so fast. Too bad I look like hell...
Liz joined Alex and Maria at their lockers.
"Hey girl, what's up?" Alex asked.
"I can't believe he did that. Just gave me $275.00. Like, he suddenly remembered all my other birthdays and wanted to make up for it. Well you know what, it's too little too late." Maria announced.
"What are you talking about?" Liz asked.
"Maria's very own daddy dearest gave her money for her birthday." Alex explained to Liz before turning his face back to Maria. "Look at the bright side, you have money so you can spend it." They all paused while thinking of what to do with it before Alex yelled out enthusiastically, "I call a night of shopping!"
Liz and Maria both stared at him with incredulous looks. The words Liz, Maria and shopping did not go well together.
"Or.. not." Alex finished.
"I don't want his money." Maria shrugged before brushing the subject away with another question. "So Isabel's dad is okay now?" She asked while fumbling around in her purse.
"Yeah, he's actually going to be released today. Isabel went home yesterday though. She decided she'd stay with Diane so they could talk."
Alex and Maria simultaneously nodded in understanding.
"So..." Liz started, suddenly feeling embarassed from divulging what seemed like so much information about Isabel to Alex and Maria.
"So.. you're friends with her again?" Maria asked. "Cuz I mean, it's okay.. if you are." She said, still fumbling around in her purse, not looking Liz in the eyes.
"No, we're not friends." Liz said. "I mean.. no. Not exactly." She shook her head. The three friends stood in awkward silence for a while before Maria cut in at random,
"God, Michael is so great in the sack!"
Alex and Liz just gave each other knowing looks while rolling their eyes.
"Well, he must be special to keep you tame for so long." Alex joked.
"Psh.. more like a big-"
"God! Maria! Geez, I don't really want to hear this." Liz said, the laughter evident in her voice.
"Oh come on, Chica. I know you want to know all the dirty little details of sex!" At that moment, Max walked past the group, and Liz's eyes strayed towards his backside. Maria noticed this and didn't hesitate to voice her opinion. "Or maybe I should say you want to experience them. With a certain SOMEBODY."
Liz quirked her brows, as if not understanding what Maria was referring to.
"Oh, come on, Liz." Alex said. "It's so obvious. Stop being in denial, hon. You are STILL insanely obsessed with Max Evans."
Liz just shook her head, still unable to keep her eyes off of Max.
"I need to get over him." She said, a hint of sadness in her voice. When she looked back over at Maria, she noticed her plopping a pill in her mouth and then downing it with whatever drink she had in her so-called "water bottle".
Did I really just see that? Maria taking a pill of some kind. I've seen her drink before, well, I see her drink a lot. But I have never seen her take some sort of pill.. if she-
Maria noticed Liz's speculative look and shrugged her shoulders.
"What?" She asked nonchalantly.
"What was that?" Liz asked, eyes locked in on Maria's with worry etched in her voice.
"Liz, hon, I have mucho cramps and if I don't take advil.. I am so going to-"
"Okay!" Alex shouted.. "You know, I am here." He flailed his arms around, exaggerating his existence.
"Sorry Alex." Liz said, her eyes still warily focusing on Maria. "Can I see the bottle?"
"What?" Maria asked.
"Can I SEE the bottle of advil?" Liz asked.
Maria bit her lip as she dug into her purse and grabbed the bottle, handing it over to Liz.
"So nice to know my own friend doesn't trust me." Maria mumbled.
"I'm only looking out for you. I'm sorry if that bothers you, but I don't want something bad to happen to someone I care about."
Maria's lips turned up into a half smile, and she slightly nodded.
"Like how Isabel's dad had a heart-attack? You know, something bad happened to her and-"
"Right.. something like that." Liz broke in before Maria could mention anything else about the situation.
The first bell rang, and the school day began..
Now that everything is settled with Maria, I can't help but getting this whole.. like, feeling, from looking at Max. And right now, in English, even though he's sitting in the back.. I feel like he's looking at me. And it's making me feel wanted. Only it's something, like, deeper than that.
Max's amber eyes continued to scan over Liz's long mane of brown hair. The red streaks in it adding a certain glow to her features. Her big doe eyes held so much wonder, and he remembered how she always looked at him with so much care in those brown eyes of hers.
Max closed his eyes to take all her flawed beauty in at the precise moment Liz dared to take a glance at him.
Oh God. He's doing it again. Closing his eyes...
She couldn't help but release a sigh into the silent classroom as she rested her cheek on her hand.
Everyone looked over at her while she remained completely oblivious to the stares. A secretive, dreamy smile on her lips and a far-off look in her eyes.
When the bell rang, Liz wasn't prepared for what would happen next. She walked out of her English class, her books clutched near her chest. As she slowly stepped towards her locker she felt hands grab her with a gentle force, and before she knew it she was in the Eraser room.
"What the-" She started to speak, but through a shimmer of light beaming into the room, noticed Max's soulful eyes boring into hers.
"I had to.." Max's voice dwindled away as her eyes locked in on his lips, noticing him getting closer and closer to her.
Please let this not be a dream. Please let this not be a dream.
She felt a hand gently caress her cheek before cupping it, while the other slid through her silky hair, only to slide down towards her waist and spontaneously grab her and pull her to him. The transformation from gentle to passionate changed so quickly it made her pulse race. He searched her eyes for any warriness and when he found none, he pressed his lips to hers.
A flash of blinding light swam through Liz's mind as she felt the intensity of his tongue tracing her lips, gently nudging them open. It was completely natural for her tongue to gravitate towards his, dueling for supremacy. She couldn't help but moan as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer. The feel of his hand gently massaging her scalp and running through her hair only made her feel his passion more.
And as quickly as he changed from gentle to passionate, he switched back. His tongue lazily meshing with hers, and the hand he previously had in her hair gave her the lightest caress on her back before both his arms wrapped around her waist and she felt him shower her face with butterfly kisses.
His gentle kisses made her feel so intensely loved, and that flash of light beamed into flashes of images.
I see him again. Sitting with his guitar playing that song Red. He's looking at the phone, thinking of calling... me? It's the day he stood me up. He's confused. He doesn't know what he's feeling.... for me.. and he's.. scared. Scared of me?
After the rush of images surged through Liz's mind, she felt Max place a soft kiss on her forehead before resting his head against hers and closing his eyes again.
Liz had to bite her lip to keep from sighing as she watched his eyelids flutter closed.
Okay. I wonder if he felt what I felt. Is this some alien thing? We really need to talk.. but right now all I can think of doing is.. kissing him. His breathing is so labored. Even with his soulful eyes closed he still looks intense. Like he's thinking.
"Max?" Liz asked, trying to catch her breath. "Did you feel that?"
"What?" Max asked, his eyes snapping open.
"These.." Liz had to step back so she could concentrate. "Image.. things." She tried to explain with the use of her hands indicating that her nervousness was setting in.
"Image things?" Max echoed her question. Liz started pacing back and forth in what little space she had..
"Max, please. Don't play dumb with me. Just be honest. Please. Do you see things when we.. kiss." Voicing the question suddenly made her feel self-conscious, causing her to look down at the ground hoping Max wouldn't notice her blushing.
God, he probably thinks I'm some inexperienced moron. Oh wait.. I am one.
When she looked from the ground back up into his eyes, she saw him hesitate. The small moment of hesitation brought hope to her, and she continued. "Because.. I.. I think I saw you. Like, from the past.. and you were with your guitar."
Max turned around,
"I don't know what you're talking about." An awkward pause, and then he continued, "Listen, Liz.. I gotta go find Shane.. he's going to do that tutor thing today.."
As Liz heard the door to the Eraser Room close, she felt her bottom lip tremble, and a fresh set of tears well in her eyes.
Why does this hurt so much more than being stood up did?
Liz stood in the bathroom, looking at herself in the mirror. Her lips looked softer, more pink. Like they'd been thoroughly kissed, and she couldn't help the bittersweet smile that emerged from the mixed thoughts of Max. In a sense she just wanted him. She wanted to know the real him, the him nobody else knew, because deep down inside her heart she knew that behind those eyes of his he held so much more than he let show. Then she'd think of what an asshole he'd be to her, and she'd have a brief moment where she hated him with a passion... but damn if he weren't one hell of a kisser.
She touched her hand to her lips before sighing.
I WILL find him and MAKE him talk to me. I have to. I will not crumble to his infectious kisses. I will find him, look him in the eyes, and demand a response from him.... woah, why does that sound somewhat kinky? My mind is so working in overdrive today.
The door creeked open and in walked Isabel. The two shared a secret smile before Maria rushed in and immediately spouted words.
"Oh my God Chica! I just came up with THE greatest idea!"
"What is it?" Liz asked, smiling from Maria's contagious giddiness.
"You know that money my dad gave me earlier?" Maria started to giggle while taking a swig from her bottle.
"Yeah.." Liz responded hesitantly, her eyes still focused on the bottle in Maria's hand.
Is it just me, or does she seem to be drinking a lot more recently?
"I am going to throw a party! A big one. Not just some little random shindig.. but this big, whole, chaotic party with EVERYONE there. It will be the party of all parties. And we will so have a time!"
"That's what you want to do?" Liz asked.
"Of course!" Maria nearly shouted. "I'll have it Friday. Think I can manage to get a bunch of people on such short notice?" Maria flashed a devilish grin.
So it's Thursday now. Surprisingly the week has been going by fast. Maybe it's from all those times I've been spending in the Eraser Room.. but we won't go there. The point is that it's Thursday, which means that tomorrow is Friday, and Maria's party is going to be..
"Oh my God, Lizzie! You will not believe this. I was just invited to my own party!" Maria announced with delight. She grabbed Liz by the cheeks and asked, "Do ya love it? I told you it was going to be big."
Big. One big party.
"Are you sure your mom will be okay with everything?" Liz asked.
"Liz." Maria removed her hands from Liz's face and looked her straight in the eyes. "My mother is a hippie. She knows I'm going to have some people over and she knows there's going to be some drinking going on. She's cool with everything."
"If you say so."
It's 5th period and I'm in the Eraser Room... waiting for Max to show up. Okay, so I've been seeing him here this whole week. I had this whole plan to actually talk to him, but for some reaon whenever he shows up...
And as if he could read her mind he walked in and leaned against the wall while taking a deep breath and closing his eyes.
The power of attraction is just so intense.
"Hey." Liz spoke out shyly. Max opened his eyes and didn't hesitate to walk over to her and run his hand over her cheek.
"Hey-" He responded, his voice deep and sensual. He leaned down and soon gentle kisses became passionate, and Liz's top rode up while she felt Max's hand on her smooth stomach, causing emotions to course through her body that she'd never felt before, and images to flood through her mind like all the other times she was with him.
He has to be feeling the same thing..
Slowly, she pulled away.
"Max?" He didn't answer, only stared at her with dark, intense eyes. She nearly crumbled for the millionth, time, but somehow her strenght of mind forced her to speak.
"You have to be feeling what I'm feeling. I can sense it." As he turned around to leave, she stood up and grabbed his arm.
"No. You are not going to walk out on me, Max. This whole week I've wanted to talk to you, and I am going to get my chance today. I keep coming back, I don't want to, but I do. The least you could do is talk to me."
He just looked at her blankly.
"You know, talking, it's what two people do. It's a form of communication." Liz's irritation was starting to surface and cause an anger in her voice. The anger only seamed to endear Max more to her.
"I do." The words were so unexpected, Liz had to make sure she was hearing them right.
He closed his eyes and answered again, "I said I do. Okay? I feel things I'm not used to feeling. I'm not supposed to..", and his words trailed off.
He feels things? He feels things. He feels the same about me.
All Liz managed to hear from Max were the words "I feel things".. everything else just meshed in her brain and ran together in one long sentence.
"Like.. what things?"
"Listen Liz. You got what you wanted to hear, okay? Just don't ask any more questions." His eyes were searching hers, pleading with her to comply with his wishes. Liz only had the power to nod. And with that, he left. Leaving her with more than she bargained for.
On the bus on the way home, Sean sat next to Liz.
"So?" He asked.
"You're acting different. All smiley-faced and everything. I want to know why."
"Well, Sean. We don't always get the things we want now, do we?" She responded, the familiar comment would have sounded more sarcastic, but in her unusual giddiness, it sounded more teasing.
"Okay, something is definitely wrong here. You're not brooding, Parker."
"What's to brood about?" Liz asked with a dreamy quality on her face. Figuring whatever it was that made Liz happy had to do with Max, Sean decided to try a different tactic.
"So, want to know how the tutoring is going?"
"Mmm hmm." Was Liz's only reply. Her eyes never falling from the dreamy expression, and her voice carrying a sweet quality to it.
"He's actually progressing quite well. Like he actually cares."
"That's because he does." Liz said, as the bus made a stop and she stood up to get off. Sean followed right behind her.
"So it is him?" He asked. "He's the reason you're smiling."
"Sean, mind your own business." Liz said as she turned from him and began walking across the street to her house.
"No, that's good. I was beginning to think aliens came down and took over your body." Sean spoke more to himself than to her.
I don't remember the last time I was this happy. Okay, well, maybe it was when I thought we had that whole date thing going on. But this.. his words. They were just, so right at the time. I needed them. I was starting to freak out. It's like, he let me in a little more to his real self. A little deeper to his life... I feel like I know him more than any one else does.
"Hi mom." Liz smiled and then placed a chaste kiss on her mother's cheek.
"Hello Liz." Nancy answered warily, wondering what happened to her daughter's former self. Liz started to bound up the stairs while humming a tune unfamiliar to her mother's ears.
"Oh yeah." Liz turned around and cheerily bounced down the stairs back over to her mother. "Can I go sleep over Maria's tomorrow?"
"Will her mother be there?" Nancy asked.
"No.. her mother will be off in a commune having an orgy. Of course she will be there!" Liz asnwered, all smiles.
"Well." Nancy's hesitation only lasted a moment, with Liz actually happy for once, Nancy found it hard to say no to her.
"Great!" Liz started up the stairs again.
I'm surprised there's no catch.
Liz paused where she was standing on the steps.
Damn.. I should have knocked on wood.
"you.. work tonight."
Liz could just sense the sly smirk cross her mother's face. In response, she just turned around calling out, "That's all?"
"I thought you hated waitressing."
"I don't mind it too much." Liz smiled a cheeky grin before actually making it to her room.
"Mom!" Liz yelled from her room,
"Tell me when Tess gets home. I have yet to kill her!"