|posted on 27-May-2002 11:31:39 PM by Audio Poet|
|Title: Letting Go, Holding on|
Disclaimer: I still do not own Roswell. Lyrics belong to Ty Herndon.
Summary: It's time for Liz Parker to return to the ones she loves but is eighteen years to long to be gone?
Category: Future Fic; M/L
Distribution: Please ask before posting.
Author’s Note: Show canon through A Roswell Christmas Carol.
Dedication: To Jenn who has read all my fics CC and UC as well as some of my ideas with many thanks.
Special Thanks to the many people who have beta’d this and helped me along the way and to Jenn who is still helping.
And here we go...
His heart’s telling him to hold on for dear life
Cause deep down inside he knows she’s letting go for good this time.
Today my daughter will become Mrs. Bethany Valenti, wife of Jayson Valenti, son of Kyle and Tess Valenti. “How did this ever happen?” I wondered out loud.
“Son, I found myself asking the same question when I was about to give away my daughter,” Philip Evans said, laughing at the memory.
“Dad it’s not that I don’t like Jay, I just don’t want to let Beth go,” I replied.
“Yeah, I know. I didn’t want to let Izzy go. But look at her now: she’s healthy, successful, and happy. Besides who better then Jay to take care of Beth forever? He loves her.”
I sighed, “I know Dad. You’re right.”
He looked me in the eyes, “What’s really bothering you son?”
“I wish Liz could be here now, for Beth.”
Before he could say anything else Isabel came running in saying it was time to go.
As I walked my Beth down the aisle I wondered what it would have been like if I had ever had the opportunity to have my wedding. “Who here gives this women to be wed?”
“I do,” I said to the minister. There, I did it, I said the two words I had been dreading since Jay asked me for permission to marry Bethany. I gave him the one gift Liz had given me, Beth, our daughter.
My son is getting married. It’s strange to think of. He’s young, too young to be married. But I would never say that to anyone, I was the same age when Tess and I were married.
Beth Evans, the women becoming my son’s wife, is the daughter of Liz Parker. You would think Beth was Max’s alone except she looks just like Liz. Beth was four months old when Liz left. It broke Max’s heart. One day he was happily engaged, the next he was a struggling single Dad. He’s done a great job.
Tess and I have always looked out for him. I guess that’s why it was inevitable that our children would marry. Honestly there is no one else I would want Jayson to marry.
I silently watch as they repeat their vows. Tess is crying and I offer her more tissues. She found her human side years ago. I smile as they present Mr. and Mrs. Jayson Valenti. Finally Bethany is part of the family.
I have never fully appreciated the ability to shapeshift until today. Today as I sit at my daughter’s wedding in the form of Theresa, Michael’s latest ‘Maria doesn’t mean the world to me’ fling.
I watched their pattern. Every time they broke up Michael had a fling until they made up. Three days ago when he stormed out of her place I cornered him. We made a deal that if he brought me to the wedding and made up with Maria I would tell him where I have been for the last 18 years. So I told him of my adventures and today I sit with him as I watch my daughter marry the man she loves.
She’s beautiful. She looks like me with her long dark hair and petite figure but she has Max’s eyes, ears, and smile. She looks so happy and I can’t help but think of everything I’ve missed.
Michael’s been smiling at me the entire time; Maria’s been glaring in our direction. “Hey Michael.” I didn’t even see Max headed our way.
“Maxwell, this is my friend Theresa.”
“Friend?” he questioned.
“Yes, just friends,” I smiled.
“We work near each other, she’s new to the area.” It was true I was living in Roswell again and we did work near each other.
“Well, have fun at the reception,” I heard him say before he headed back to Bethany. As I watched them embrace I felt the tears roll down my cheeks.
“Shh, it’s okay,” I heard Michael say as we headed towards the reception area. “He would understand if you told him.”
“I think I’m a little to late,” I said, “I’ve already missed too much.” As we sat down at the table I said, “Don’t forget to talk to Maria tonight.”
“I won’t,” he smiled at me again.
I miss Liz. That’s all I can think of as I sit at the reception. The dancing began about ten minutes ago. Michael and Theresa just made their way out there. I can’t believe he brought someone else to the wedding. I never dreamed I would be in the same on and off relationship for over twenty years. I should give up on him. I should walk away forever this time. But I won’t, I never will.
“May I have this dance?” It was Michael.
“Yeah.” I took the hand he offered and let him lead me out to dance.
He smiled and held me close. “You look beautiful Maria and please just let me say this before you say anything. The last twenty years have been wonderful and I have very few regrets. But the ones I do have are pretty big. I should of married you years ago but instead I put you on this emotional roller coaster and I still haven’t let you off. But today I want that to end. I want us to spend the rest of our lives together. I want to marry you like I should have years ago. I love you Maria.”
“And I love you Michael.” What else could I say after that?
“So you’ll marry me?”
“Of course I’ll marry you.” He looks kind of relieved, “Did you think I would say no?” He smiles. Then I looked over at Theresa who just smiled at us. “What’s the deal with her?” I asked him.
“She owed me a favor,” he smiled then continued, “I ran into her after I left your place the other night and poured my heart out. She told me to tell you what I told her, and now I have.”
We just held each other close and continued to dance. Then I looked over at her again, “Michael look.”
I couldn’t just let her sit there by herself as Michael and Maria made up again. Besides she is beautiful and kind of looks like Liz. “Would you like to dance?” I asked her.
“That would be nice.” She smiled at me.
I lead her to dance floor. It had been years since I had danced with anyone. For some reason it just felt right. “How long have you lived in Roswell?” I asked.
“Only a few weeks.”
“What brings you here?”
“I bought the UFO Center,” she smiled.
“So you’re a believer then, huh?” I joked with her.
She looked up at me, “If you only knew.” She smiled.
I looked into her eyes as the song was ending, I could tell they held secrets. The previous comment had intrigued me.
“Thank you for the dance,” she said.
“No problem.” Then I headed off to follow Michael out the door he and Maria had just gone though. “Michael,” I yelled towards him.
“You looked cozy a minute ago,” he said.
“Who is she?” I asked.
“You need to ask her that,” he said.
“Is she one of us?” I asked him.
“Max, if you want to get to know her talk to her.”
I am intrigued by this woman.
I always have hated the morning after. Why did I dance with Max, I keep screaming at myself. I’m in the museum; it’s almost time to open. ‘So you’re a believer’, I laughed at the other sentence ringing through my head. I should have said something cute like ‘not only am I a believer I’m an alien too’ but I couldn’t.
Almost noon and another customer was on their way to the counter. “Damn,” I muttered softly as I saw who it was. “What brings you by here Max?” I asked him.
“I was wondering if you would like to join me for lunch at the CrashDown?” he asked.
My heart was saying yes my head no. “Umm, that would be nice.”
We enjoyed a nice lunch and said we should get together again. I love the idea of seeing him again but he needs to know who I am.
[ edited 10time(s), last at 23-Aug-2002 4:16:05 PM ]
|posted on 9-Jun-2002 4:05:34 AM by Audio Poet|
|I’m placing this AN in all my fics. So, I didn’t know I was going out of town until I packed a few minutes ago. I’m doing the whole spontaneous trip thing. I’ll be back in a few days and since I’m taking my laptop I hope to have an update for at least two of my fics when I get back.|
|posted on 11-Jun-2002 2:19:15 PM by Audio Poet|
|Home again and I’m very sorry but the new part isn’t ready yet. But I promise sometime this week there will be something for you. Anybody interested in something from Bethany’s POV?|
|posted on 21-Jun-2002 11:29:05 PM by Audio Poet|
|Author’s Note: The date follows Earth’s time line and they stayed per say in Liz’s time.|
I received a package in the mail today. The contents were a book, a couple photographs, and a very alien pendent on a necklace. Liz sent me her journal. Liz. My missing fiancé sent me her journal, her most prized possession, her sanctuary as she once told me. It’s been eighteen years and I have moved through all five stages of grief. I owe surviving the first few years Liz was gone to Kyle and Tess. Without there support I’m not sure where I would be now. Eighteen years of silence and now I have the first contact, a package postmarked Roswell. I wonder how it is I haven’t run into her yet? I suppose I should just start read.
November 18, 2002
I’m Liz Parker and my nightmare has just begun again. Future Max returned last night and this time from the year 2016. I have to go with him to save the world. His Liz died last night and he needs my help again. So, I kissed Max and Bethany good-bye and I left. I have no other choice. I will not stay here if I can make a difference once again.
Apparently our plan to save the world worked, kind of. Max and I never fell out of love. But Tess fell in love with Kyle and has been very happily married to him since we graduated from high school. Again he will not tell me much about the life he lives but he did say we were together and very much in love.
January 23, 2004
We arrived on Antar today. Space travel takes awhile, especially since we can not use the Granolith. Apparently it would cause too much commotion and our enemies would know we left Earth. I have spent just over a year learning all that this Max knows about the planet. I’m not sure if I could have ever been prepared for this. It’s a mess here. You can tell the years of war have taken a toll on this planet.
We visited Max’s mom; she’s an incredible woman. I told her my side of the story (of how I was the one chosen to come to Antar), he told her his side, and she filled in the blanks between the two. The war is over but they still are not safe, not all their enemies are dead. Max has to destroy the few remaining. That’s where I come in; Max can’t defeat our enemies by himself. He needs the help of the one he loves, the other half of his soul. His Liz died almost two years ago in an attack on Earth, just before he was sent to find me. Technically I’m not his Liz but since we are both Liz Parker we have the same essence. Therefore I have to be the Liz that helps.
Apparently the enemies have taken over future Max’s Earth. Now in the present time we have to defeat the seven remaining enemies, loyalists to Khivar, so they will no longer be a threat, which will prevent the attack in 2016 and prevent the end of the world.
March 14, 2004
Today has been such an emotional day. I am now an alien. They very Antarian technology that put Max, Tess, Isabel and Michael into pods has changed me into an alien. The process is irreversible but at least now I am ready to fight. My DNA has been changed to that of Antarian DNA and my powers were assigned based upon what I will need, of course it helps that I have some powers from when Max healed me. The technology here is amazing. They are very advanced compared to Earth in some ways but in other way they are the same and even more primitive in a few extreme cases.
Max and I talked today. I hate hearing about how he remembers things. He remembers things I know I will never experience, our wedding being the most heart breaking to me. We had a son and another daughter in his world. Jakob Michael was born about 16 months after we were married and 18 months after that Katherine Isabella was born.
In his time Bethany was 14 and growing up to look like me. Jakob was 11, quite a troublemaker kind of like his Uncle Michael. Bella was 9 and eager to begin the piano lessons she was promised.
He left the children with Tess and Kyle. They have a son two months younger then Bethany. I will never experience all the things he speaks of and when he gets back to his time things will not be same. But at least now we know Earth will be safe from this threat.
I’m trying not to feel some of these emotions. I’m going to miss watching Bethany grow up and I will now never have the children Max has told me so much about. But at least I know I am not alone in this. I have Max, he may not be my Max but he is a great friend.
October 27, 2004
I have spent the last six months training. I went through some of the military programs. I wanted to learn how to use and control my powers, now I can do both quite well. My powers are mostly physical, I will need to fight and defend myself when the time comes. But I have some mental powers too, which are mainly to keep myself connected to Max in case we get separated. Apparently because we are the essence of each other soulmates and not the real person our natural connection is weak.
Max has been doing a lot of searching, and he thinks he may have found one of the enemies we are looking for. We will probably leave tomorrow. I fell like I’m in one of those sci-fi shows I loved growing up, Max and I have our own spaceship.
April 13, 2007
We arrived back to Antar yesterday. Max and I left for a nearby planet two days after I last wrote. It took us four months to travel there then another six months to find Ravia, the first of the seven we are hunting. We followed him for two months. He led us to Algo, our second target, and gave a few clues as to where to start our searches for the others.
So, we recorded all the information we needed then laid low until after the first of 2006. I think what made Ravia suspicious of us was the changes we had made in his environment. It was nothing drastic but you would have to be blind not to notice two people living in close proximity and watching you.
We broke into his home and kidnapped him. We sought information but he wouldn’t give any up. After a few months he proved useless so we finished our task. He will always stick out in my mind, until that day I had never killed a man.
The night we made our move was beautiful. It was also the night Max pointed out which star was Earth. I guess the process of taking a man’s life reminded me of how fragile life is. It allowed me a whole new way to look at and appreciate even the littlest things around me.
We stayed silent until June then we kidnapped Algo. He put up a bit of a fight. He knew we wanted him dead. He gave us good information until December when he realized no matter what he told us he would still die. He quit cooperating and we left for Antar in January after disposing of his body. Now we have arrived back and we can rest again, for now.
December 30, 2007
We’re leaving again tomorrow. I’m not entirely sure where we are headed, I’m still not as fimular with these new galaxies as I would like to become. I do know the trip will take almost eight months and the planet we are headed to is called Hagrid. We know the exact location of both Etron and Pislen and we are ready to attack.
May 19, 2010
We got Etron and Pislen just before they could follow through with their plan to attack a neighboring country. They put up a fight and it took awhile but eventually we came out victorious then returned to Antar, to home.
This battle is so hard. On Antar we have resources and personnel to help us with research, planning, and various strategies. But as soon as we leave we’re two people fighting a battle that will ultimately save two worlds, one of which has no clue of the attacks that would otherwise occur.
How did I get to be who I am today? I miss my Max. I miss Bethany. I miss Maria and Michael, Isabel, Alex. I even miss Tess and Kyle. I want to go home, to Earth, but I can’t, I have to finish what we have started. I will finish what I have begun.
February 26, 2011
We found Khivar, Nivida, and Dagino. It will take us a year to travel back to the Milky Way galaxy. Although we do not know why they are there, Max and I both think they’re hiding and planning the attacks that took place in his time. The risks are great and we still do not know how powerful Khivar is.
I spent most of yesterday with Max’s mom. She is very old and is afraid her time will run out before her children return, although she admitted to me she does not think they should return to Antar. As she said they’re lives are on Earth and their happiness means so much more to her. I talked to her about my Max and Bethany and everyone else. We had a wonderful day together.
October 14, 2014
I am smiling for the first time since before we left for our final mission. I am back to Antar, home again and I am alive. The last four years have been intense but we have survived.
We found a safe house immediately after landing on Neptune. We took some time to get settled then we met Dagino for the first time. He seemed to be clueless as to who we were, we later found out he was faking it. He was the bait to a trap we fell for.
So, we thought we had the one up. We had known Dagino for four months and had actually been acquaintances of his. We were going to make a move that night. He was going to be the latest victim our strategy, kidnap and use for information. Instead we were the ones captured. Dagino knew who we were, and he was working directly with Khivar.
The first three months weren’t that bad. Max and I shared a cell. They fed us twice a day and just sort of left us alone. Then they got curious. They started to ask us questions. Slowly we figured out a few things for ourselves, the most important being that they thought I was a human.
After those three months they got sick of questions and decided they wanted to conduct a few experiments. I was their test subject. In all the years I have lived, knowing what my Max went through in the White Room was an experience I never wanted to live, I now have experiences that compare to his. Max quickly came up with a plan. Two months later when Dagino and Navida were picking me up for testing we executed it.
I used my powers on them as they transported me. I killed Dagino and severely injured Nivida. I freed Max from our cell then went back and finished off Nivida. We escaped immediately afterwards.
It took Khivar three months to find us again. We had a great battle. For the most part everyone fought fair; we just waited to see who would be the last standing. He put a hell of a fight but in the end Max and I proved to be stronger. That night was the reason I had to be brought into this. Max would not of been able to defeat Khivar by himself.
Two weeks later we left and today we got home.
April 18, 2015
I have spent the last six months being a scientist. Antar is beautiful and I am having so much fun conducting research. I’m kind of trying to cover all the sciences I can. I know I can stay here forever but I think someday I would like to go back to Earth. In the mean time I want to learn everything I can. It amazes me how different but similar the technologies compare to that of Earth.
Max has been helping reestablish and build a new government. Things are coming together well. The clean up and reconstruction has been slow, although steady. It is almost complete.
May 11, 2015
I was given an announcement today. My ship to go back to Earth leaves tomorrow. Max’s mom asked me if I was excited to be going home. Home. I’m not sure if I can call earth home again, not just yet at least. Antar has been my home for thirteen years now. Max and I had our last long talk tonight. He’s being sent back tomorrow too, although I’m not sure where he’s being sent back too. I’m guessing Earth, his time. For the first time I have realized this is truly over.
July 21, 2016
I’m in Portland, Oregon. I got back four days ago. I thought I was ready to face everyone but I not. It’s been fourteen years. I can’t just go back to Roswell and walk back into everyone’s lives. So, here I am in a foreign place once again. If I could fit in on another planet I’m sure I’ll be fine here.
December 18, 2016
Things aren’t so bad. I’m going to college and I work at a library. I never got a chance to go to college before and now I am getting one of the things I always dreamed of. I live close to campus. Things are going well, thank god for student grants and scholarships.
May 18, 2017
I survived my freshman year. I’m spending the summer in Montana as a nanny. One of my professors recommended me to a family friend. It’s not a job I would normally consider but it pays well and I love the kids.
July 18, 2018
Today Bethany is sixteen years old. Sweet sixteen. I gave birth to her sixteen years ago today. I wish I was there to celebrate with them. I miss my life. I miss Max, Bethany, Roswell, everything. I even miss the friendship I had developed with Future Max. I could go back but hasn’t it been too long? Would it even make a difference now? I’m not quite sure. Instead of righting my wrongs I’m spending another summer in Montana.
August 17, 2019
I’m in New Mexico. I’m not sure why but when I got to the Montana airport to go back to Portland I got the sudden need to check things out back home. I’ve been to the CrashDown and the UFO Center, which is for sale. I drove by the Evans’ house. It appears as if Mr. and Mrs. Evans still live there. My parents are still running the CrashDown, I was glad to see that. Now I have to get of here. This place kind of creeps me out. Or maybe it’s the blonde I’ve shapeshifted into that does.
January 3, 2020
I couldn’t get the for sale sign on the UFO Center out of my mind. So, here I am in Roswell again. I bought the UFO Center and the apartment with it. I know heading back to Roswell may not be the best choice but now I have to face the past. I’m just not looking forward to paying off the loan.
I bought a newspaper today and was looking through the local section when the engagements page caught my attention. Bethany Evans – Jayson Valenti engaged December 18, 2019 to be wed June 2020. My baby girl is getting married.
Interesting enough I saw Michael and some woman while I was at the CrashDown. I guess I was staring because my waitress came by and said “Don’t waste your time, he always runs back to Maria DeLuca.”
May 14, 2020
I graduated yesterday and today I moved from Portland to Roswell. The UFO Center was closed last week so we could finish all the legal aspects of everything. I put up an “Under New Management: Re-Opening May 20th” sign today. I figured a few days to settle in wouldn’t hurt.
June 3, 2020
Justin is my favorite employee as of this afternoon. He’s a great kid, a senior at West Roswell and knows Jay Valenti really well. He was telling me about the wedding explaining he needs the day off because he’s an usher. Apparently Jay and Beth, as everyone calls her, have been dating forever. I only wish I could find a way to be at Bethany’s wedding.
June 17, 2020
I did something wonderfully horrible tonight. I accidentally overheard Maria and Michael fighting so I shapeshifted into my true self then I waited until he left her place and begged him to bring me to the wedding as his date. He looked at me like I was crazy (not that I blame him) then he said “You disappear for over eighteen years, breaking my best friends heart in the process to just show up one night and beg me to bring you to a wedding?”
I told him I could explain and he asked me why that would make a difference. So, instead of responding verbally I showed him my powers by changing the color of my clothing, hair, and make up. Then we made a deal. I had to tell him where I have been and he has to bring me to the wedding.
So, I brought him back to my place and told him about everything. I think shock would be the only appropriate word to explain his reaction. I think maybe Michael needed some to talk too. To my surprise after I told him my story he told me how much he loves Maria and how he wishes he could set things straight for good and marry her. I told him to tell her that after the wedding. Maybe those two will finally work things out.
June 20, 2020
Bethany is so beautiful. I am so proud of her. She looked so happy. Max did a great job raising her. Speaking of Max, we danced, which has me freaked out. After Maria glared at me through the entire ceremony and part of the reception Michael finally made up with her.
While they were dancing Max asked me to dance. We were talking and somehow got on the subject of how I bought the UFO Center. He asked me if I was a believer and I said, “If you only knew.” I might as well of said ‘I’m an alien and I know who you are.’ Michael said he hasn’t dated since I left. Has he waited for me? Or was he not dating for Bethany’s sake? Why does Max Evans still make my heart skip beats? Am I doomed to spend the rest of my life in love with a man who doesn’t know I’m alive anymore?
June 23, 2020
While this letter cannot explain to you all the things I wish to say, someday hopefully I will be able to. I can no longer hide. I have to be me. I have to be Liz Parker. I thought it would be better for you to hear I am back from me than from the talk around Roswell.
I am so sorry for everything. I know my disappearing was sudden and strange but after reading this journal you now know everything that has occurred in the last eighteen years. I know I can never make up the lost time but I do owe you the explanation. I am headed to the post office to drop this off then I will go talk to my parents and Maria. Michael is going to talk to Isabel and Alex. Michael thought it would be best if you told Kyle and Tess. It is completely up to you whether Bethany finds out of my return or not.
The necklace in the package is a gift from your mother. It was your father’s and after his death he wanted you to have it. I was to give it you whenever we met again. I know there are still a lot of unanswered questions and you probably still need some explanations. You know where to find me if you want them. As for everything else, time will tell.
All my love,
“Now what do I do?” Max said out loud to himself pacing around his living room tears flowing freely down his face.
|posted on 7-Jul-2002 4:16:45 PM by Audio Poet|
|Good news and bad news time again unfortunately the bad is more then the good. I've been recruited to help move my brother and his family home but it's going to take some time (packing etc.). So, I'm leaving tomorrow morning bright and early (6 am). On to the good news, I'll have (some) time to write why I'm gone. So, I'll see you in a month with updates .|
|posted on 3-Aug-2002 10:03:41 PM by Audio Poet|
|So, I’m home now (I know finally) and I do have updates. I’ll get them posted as soon as possible (they need to be typed, and beta’d first.) I hope anyone sill reading any of my stories hasn’t lost interest by now. |
|posted on 16-Aug-2002 2:26:41 AM by Audio Poet|
|I have issues with this part but when I started posting the fic I said I would finish it. There’s a bet on whether I can finish something CC . Hope you enjoy.|
Liz and I ran into Sheriff Valenti today, Sheriff Kyle Valenti that is. “I heard a rumor to the effect you were back Liz,” he said.
“Indeed I am,” Liz said calmly. “I bought the UFO Center.”
He laughed, “How fitting.”
“Thanks,” Liz said almost sarcastically. Most people are just accepting that she’s back. She’s giving some excuse of needing time to figure out who she is. I know that’s not true, something else happened. I asked her last night and she just said so many things have happened then she got this far off look on her face. At least she admitted it was something else.
The weird part is Max knows what happened. At least I think he does. He’s been acting very strange the last few days and he is definitely avoiding anywhere she may be. Him and Michael have always been talking a lot more then usual and more privately then ever. Something is definitely going on.
I talked Tess, Max, and Isabel into meeting like we used before we had people in on our secret. We were talking about Liz; we needed to talk about Liz. We all needed to know everything but what Max had to say shocked me. I know I told him to check into her himself but I never thought he really would.
“How long has she been in Roswell?” Isabel asked.
“She moved into her new place on May fourteenth. She found out the UFO Center was for sale last August and bought it the third of January. She graduated from Oregon State with a degree in business the day before she moved here,” Max answered.
“I’m impressed you actually talked to her,” I smiled at him but was surprised by his reply.
“Actually I haven’t talked to her yet. She sent me her journal, there’s more too,” he paused and pulled a necklace out of his pocket, “she’s an alien.”
Isabel and Tess both gasped, I gave him a look then spoke. “I’m not going into detail about everything that has happened, it’s not my story to tell. But, yes, Liz is an alien. I want you to keep that among the four of us. She wants to tell Maria, Alex, and Kyle but she’s not quite ready yet.”
“You sure seem to know a lot about Liz,” Tess spoke up.
“She was my date to Bethany’s wedding,” I smirked while enjoying the looks on Tess and Isabel’s faces.
“How?” Isabel asked.
“She can shapeshift,” I explained.
“How good is she with her powers?” Tess asked wearily.
“She’s had training we could only dream of,” Max stated.
I gave him a warning look. “So what’s new?” I was dying to change the subject.
They’re benefits to working and living at the same place. You don’t need a car, home is always close by, and best of all when you’re avoiding someone it can be easily done. Unfortunately the knock on the door told me what I knew, I couldn’t avoid Max forever.
“Hey Liz,” he said when I answered the door.
“Hi,” I replied, “Would you like to come in?”
We made our way to my living room where we sat on opposite couches. He spoke first, “You could have told me why you were leaving.”
“I wouldn’t have left if I did,” I said softly.
“Do you regret leaving?”
“Yes and no,” I paused. “I wouldn’t of left if I didn’t have to. I wish I could have been in both places…”
“But you couldn’t,” he finished for me.
“You don’t have to apologize for doing what was right.”
I only smiled. “So what now?”
“Well, you get used to living in Roswell again, let Kyle know there’s a fifth alien in town, help Maria plan her wedding, and most importantly spend some overdue quality time with you daughter.” When she smiled at me after my last words I knew I was a goner. I walked over to her and pulled her into an embrace, it was perfect. As I kissed her on top of her head I thought Maybe Liz and I will finally have our happily ever after.
|posted on 19-Aug-2002 10:40:55 PM by Audio Poet|
I’ve never had a mother. At least not that I remember. I am Bethany Parker Evans-Valenti. Parker was my mothers’ maiden name. My father always said since they were engaged they decided to make Parker my middle name rather then hyphenating my surname. But they never married. Mom disappeared when I was a baby.
Growing up I was the only girl without a mother. Sure there were other single parent homes but my friends of divorce had mothers, not fathers. I have a large family; though most of them aren’t blood related they nonetheless are family. But I knew having a mother was different. I wanted a mother when I was child. I’m not sure who was more mortified when Dad told me about puberty. Thank god Aunt Isabel and Tess pulled me aside to explain things much better a few days later. The only time I was more mortified was when Dad, Kyle, and Tess sat Jay and I down to have the sex talk, together. I think at that point they knew someday we would be involved.
As I said before I knew not having a mom was different. I would like to say I handled it well, and I did for the most part. But there were the nights I cried after Dad tucked me in. Then there were the times the other kids made fun of me for it. Jay was always there from the beginning; first as my friend, then my defender and eventually as my everything. He understood what my family meant to me because he was a member of that family.
I understood from a small age that there was something different about my family. I was eight when I found out about the secret that binds us so close together. I discovered my powers by wishing a stain away from the dress I told Dad I wouldn’t spill on. Of course I thought I had wished it away but, as you probably know, my powers removed the stain. Being an alien truly is a tie that will bind.
Despite the circumstances my dad was a wonderful father. He still is. He did his best to raise me to be the woman I am today. I am proud to say he did an excellent job. Then two years ago when I came home from my honeymoon the most amazing thing happened, I was introduced to Elizabeth Parker, my mother. Of course at the time it didn't seem so amazing. The immediate changes were unbelievable. I had known all my life Dad still had a thing for Mom but I couldn't understand how he could still be so in love with the woman who had abandon us. Sure I had heard her story almost immediately but please. Needless to say it wasn't enough for me.
Dad’s reaction truly hurt the worst. I had never seen my dad with a woman. So, it was hard enough that he was dating. Then it being my mother was worse. I didn’t think a disappearance like hers should have been so easily forgiven. There are times still when I question how he could forgive her so easily. But I’ve seen the way they look at each other and somehow that helps.
I had imagined over the years what it would like to meet my mother but I never imagined she would come back. I thought for certain, despite hearing how much she had loved him and me, she was gone forever. People don't leave and come back, that was something I learned early in life. But I'm an alien I should have known strange things were never a shock; they were merely a part of our lives.
Resentment would probably be the best term to explain how I felt. Suddenly I had a mother. Suddenly I had that missing piece. Everyone expected we would get along so well, they expected us to become close. That only fueled my resentment. But she never had any expectations, and that fueled things even more.
I suppose I had always assumed she would want to get know me better; she would want to jump right into the role she spent eighteen years avoiding. But she didn't. She gave me time and told me to take as much time as I needed. I wasn't expecting that. And time I did take. I covered the surface things immediately, the stupid things like where was her family from, medical records, things like that. Then I backed off again. I realize now it was shallow.
Three months later Jay and I had a stupid fight. Stupid as it may have been, it was our first fight since we had been married. I rushed to the house to cry to Dad, only Dad wasn't there but Mom, who had recently moved in, was. My guard was down so I just poured my heart out. Before I knew what was happening we were sharing our first mother-daughter moment as she comforted me and I cried.
That night was our turning point. After I went home I suddenly realized I finally had a mom and despite her absence I should take advantage of finally having something I had dreamed of. We didn't suddenly become close, it happened gradually but it did happen. I began to understand, I mean really understand the story of my parents. And after that understanding came I could truly understand and appreciate what my mother did in her absence. She gave up her life to save her planets, and her people. I say her planets because she truly is from Earth and Antar.
|posted on 23-Aug-2002 4:07:08 PM by Audio Poet|
Five Years Later
“Mom,” Bethany said with surprise from across the room.
“What, your dad deserved it.”
Max only blushed.
It didn’t happen overnight but eventually things worked out. Maria and Michael didn’t waste anytime and were married by the end of the summer. Max and I were engaged again shortly after their wedding. Then the waiting game began. We planned the wedding fairly quickly but we didn’t set a definite date. We wanted to wait for Bethany. She’s such an important part of our lives that it only seemed right to wait until she was ready to accept me both as her mother and as her father’s wife. And eventually Bethany came around. Max and I were married on a beautiful autumn morning.
Shortly after our engagement I moved into the house Max and I purchased so many years before. Beth and Jay now live in the apartment at the UFO Center, that I still own and operate. Every once in a while I can’t help but reflect on my life, where I’ve been, and what I’ve been through. Then I find myself smiling because it’s in those moments when I know without a doubt I wouldn’t want things any other way. It’s July third, I’m Liz Evans and I am lucky to say in this life I have no regrets.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 23-Aug-2002 4:08:08 PM ]