posted on 9-Jul-2002 1:04:45 PM by Alexandra86
Title: Young America
Author: Alexandra
Email: musicmuch86⊕ or musicmuch⊕
Disclaimer: Roswell is property of 20th Century Fox and UPN. All the songs used in the fic will be appropriately quoted. The first song in the prologue is The Motivation Proclamation by Good Charlotte.
Summary: Max, Michael, and Alex are all 16 and in a pretty famous band called Young America.


“…I’m out of time, you’re so unkind sometimes, I never lied, I never lied, I never lied,” Max sung into the microphone that was on the Los Angeles set of their new music video. His tired hands strummed the guitar. They’d been filming the video all day and they were all tired. Alex Whitman, his best friend from Roswell, New Mexico was strumming a bass and was singing background for him and Michael Guerin, his cousin and other best friend was pounding on the drums.

They were all dressed in baggy shorts and tee shirts and were in a brightly colored room. In the beginning of the day, they did all the scenes where they were just being lazy on the couches and singing, but now it was time to use the instruments and they had done the whole song five times already.

“Motivate me, I want to get my self out of this bed, captivate me, I want good thoughts inside of my head, when I fall down would you come right down and pick me right up off the ground, If I fall down would you come around and pick me right up off the ground?” He sung as the last of the song faded away.

“And that’s a wrap!” The director yelled loudly, causing the rest of the crew to clap very loudly.

Max breathed a sigh of relief and left the set to get to his trailer so he could change his clothes. It wasn’t like they didn’t like doing the music…the only part they hated was that it was so tiring sometimes. But he couldn’t complain. They had to work long and hard to get where they were now. Their first single and album, Young America, which was also the name of their band, had reached #1 on the billboard charts and on TRL.

When they started the band 3 years ago, they never really had thought they would go this far. They just played around with their instruments and sung a little in the Evans’ garage which Max and Michael both lived at. Michael had come to live with the Evans’ when he was ten years old because his parents were killed in a car accident and soon Michael had become a part of their group of friends that included Liz Parker, Maria DeLuca, and Max’s sister, Isabel.

At first, their audience was only Liz, Maria, and Isabel, but when they were all fourteen they started playing at free shows, getting attention around Roswell and at one show when they were all fifteen a talent scout was in the audience and he had heard them playing and Young America was immediately offered a deal.

The only obstacle from then on were their parents who had been skeptical of the man and didn’t want Max, Michael, and Alex to miss school. But after much begging and promising to be tutored so they could still graduate high school, their parents had relented and they began the long journey into making their band a success, and now here they were a famous band with a hit single and a hit album.

“Max, man, we’re going to a restaurant, you coming?” Michael asked him when Max got out of his trailer.

“Yea, I just have to call Liz first.” He said back. He went back to the trailer to dial Liz’s very familiar number. If there was anyone he trusted most in his life, besides his parents, it was Liz. They had been friends since they were in diapers and he relied on her most in life.

“Hello?” A female voice answered on the other end, Max immediately recognized it as Liz.

“Hey Liz.” Max responded with a smile on his face. His frustrations from the long shoot had left as soon as he heard Liz’s voice.

“Max!” Liz responded excitedly. “I’m so glad to here from you. It’s been a whole weekend.”

“I know, sorry about that.” He sighed into the phone.

Liz immediately became concerned. “What’s wrong Max?” She asked him soothingly.

“It’s just been hectic lately. I've barely had four hours to sleep this whole weekend. We had to get on two flights, do a music video, an appearance at a festival and still do tutoring. I love doing this, the music, but I just never really thought about the consequences.”

“Max, remember when we were about 12, and I said that I wanted to become a doctor, but I nearly changed my mind because I would have to spend almost a decade in college, what did you tell me?”

Max smiled and laughed lightly. “I said, ‘Liz, never, ever, ever give up your dream because you think it’s too hard. Follow your heart.’”

“Exactly Max. This is your dream. Don’t forget it.”

“Thank you Liz.”

“You welcome.”

The sat on the phones, content with just knowing each other was on the other line.

“So, what’s going on in Roswell?” Max asked her after awhile.

“Nothing much, except your pictures are everywhere.” Liz giggled. “I can’t believe how famous you all are! My Max…growing up.”

“Ha, ha, ha.”

“No seriously, we celebrated your album debuting at number one. I guess everyone here is so proud of you, Michael, and Alex. I know I am.”

“Max! You coming!” Michael shouted from outside the trailer.

“Yea! Give me a minute!” Max responded.

“Liz,” he said in the phone. “I have to go…I’ll call you later, okay?”

“Of course,” Liz responded. “Love you.”

Something stirred in Max’s stomach when he heard Liz say that to him, almost like butterflies. “I love you too Liz…bye.”


He hung up the phone and went outside to meet Alex and Michael, wishing he could spend five more minutes talking to Liz. He hadn’t seen her for nearly two months because they had been doing so much traveling and promotion. He wouldn’t see her until one more week because they had to go to New York to be on TRL and do a show there. Then, they would go back to Roswell, but it was to play at the annual crash festival so there would rarely be time to just hang out.

He remembered what he said all those years ago to Liz. To never give up his dream because it got too hard. He smiled at little. He was glad that Liz was able to make him remember that.


I'll continue this if people want to read it. *happy* Feedback please

[ edited 4 time(s), last at 11-Sep-2002 4:55:04 PM ]
posted on 14-Jul-2002 12:33:12 PM by Alexandra86
New part today *happy* Thanks for the feedback!
posted on 14-Jul-2002 8:47:31 PM by Alexandra86
Part One

Note: The song used in this part is “Bleed America” by Jimmy Eat World. Sometimes I wish I could be creative enough to write my own lyrics for this fictional band, but I only write lyrics about how much it sucks to be me, lmao.

“So this fine looking girl, I swear, she had the whole nine yards and was about 20 came up to me and was totally flirting, and she invited me back up to her hotel room, but I didn’t go. And guess why?” Michael asked Alex and Max as they sat in first class on the airplane to New York.

“Why?” Max and Alex asked at the same time.

“Because, Jim,” Michael responded referring to their huge bodyguard. “Came up to us and said that my mom called and asked if I had put the ointment on my rash.” Michael had gotten a rash on his arm from one of the shirts he had worn in the video. It was made out of some material that he guessed he must have been allergic too.

Max and Alex burst out in loud laughter at his story.

“Dude!” Alex chocked out. “I can’t believe Jim did that!”

Max shook his head. “Jim knew what he was doing…he knew exactly what he was doing.” He started laughing again.

“It wasn’t that funny.” Michael grumbled quietly, starting to get irked. It only made Alex and Max laugh harder at him.

“What’s so funny, guys?” Their manager, Jonathan Sanders asked them.

“Nothing,” Michael grumbled.

“Okay, well, if that’s the case then we need to go over our schedule for this weekend because you have a lot to do.”

The band quieted down and got serious so Jonathan could go over their agenda’s. “First thing is TRL. By the time this plane lands in New York, we have to go straight to the studio’s by 1:00 so you can be ready the show to air at 3:00. Then, as soon as TRL ends you’ll be on your way to the Virgin Mega store to do a signing and then around 7:00 you’ll go to your hotels to sleep for the night and then you’re on your way back to Roswell.” He finished and went back to his seat.

“Well, it’s not going to be as bad as last weekend.” Alex stated dryly. He loved the fame as much as the next person, but last weekend was killer because they got only five hours of sleep the whole weekend because of performances.

“Yea.” Max and Michael agreed.

For the rest of the air ride the guys were quiet. Michael put his headphones on and listened silently to Metillica while Alex listened to Red Hot Chili Peppers. And Max took out a pad of paper, hoping to write some new lyrics for their new album, which wouldn’t be out for 7 more months.

Wish I could hold you forever
But you can’t tell
Wish could love you forever
But you don’t know

You come to me with your pretty eyes
Wide as your beautiful smile
And I pretend that I don’t see it

That was all he had so far. He hadn’t let anyone see it or let anyone know it even existed because it was about Liz. He’d had a crush on her for years, ever since she had pushed him on the playground when they were both ten years old, but she never knew it because he could never work up the nerve to tell her.

Finding that he couldn’t add more, he closed his notebook with a sigh and put his head on the headrest and went to sleep. An hour later, he was woken up by Michael and Alex, who told him that the plane was landing.

They put on their sunglasses and walked out of the plane as soon as it landed, hoping anyone wouldn’t recognize them. Like boy bands, they had a large female fan base, but since they were a rock band, they also had a large male fan base.

Jonathan rushed them out of airport lobby and took them to the waiting limo that would take them to the TRL studios.

When they go to the studios they went in the building where Carson Daly greeted them.

“Hey guys, you’re going to be taken to makeup and I’ll be introducing you about a half hour into the show and your video is number 1, so you’ll be performing it instead of seeing the video.”

Alex, Max, and Michael nodded and went into the makeup room, something that they all hated.

At 3:10 it was finally time for Carson to announce them. From the backroom, they awaited their que.

“Okay, this is a new band from Roswell, New Mexico, their album has gone Gold so far, and it’s the top of the charts. Please welcome Young America!”

They walked past the crowd of yelling people, smiling, and over to Carson.

“Hey guys.” Carson greeted them.

“Hey.” Max, Michael, and Alex answered.

“Tell me, how does it feel to have the number one album in the country?”

“It feels great. This band sort of started off as a joke, and now here we are.” Michael answered.

“Okay, you’re from the infamous town of Roswell, New Mexico. Do you guys get alien jokes a lot?”

All three of them nodded. “Yea, we defiantly do.” Alex answered, laughing. “But we’re used to it. Roswell is kind of a town that makes fun of it’s self. We have UFO centers and a café called The Crashdown. And our streets are named Milky Way CT. Those kind of things.” The audience laughed.

“You guys are young, 16, how hard was it to convince your parents to let you do this, t6our, and miss school? Are you all still in school.”

Max nodded. “Yea, we have tutors who give us our school work and yea, it was pretty damn hard to convince our parents, but eventually they gave in.”

“Okay, later on today Young America will perform their second single Bleed America. Anything you guys want to mention?”

“Yea.” Max replied. “We’re going to be playing at the 10th annual Crash festival at Roswell next Saturday. It’s free concert.”

The crowd cheered at the prospect of having a free concert and then it was a commercial break. Alex, Max, and Michael went back to the dressing rooms.

“That went good.” Max said happily, suddenly pumped and ready to sing their song.

A half hour later, they were on the TRL set and Alex began strumming his bass and Michael pounded on the drums. And Max began singing in the mic.

I’m not alone cause the TV’s on, yeah
I’m not crazy cause I take the right pills, every day
And rest
Clear your conscience
Clear your thoughts with speyside, with your grain

Salt sweat, sugar on the asphalt
Our hearts littering the topsoil
Tune in
We can get the last call
Sign up
It’s the picket line or the parade
Our lives, our coal

Salt, sweat, sugar on the asphalt
Our hearts littering the topsoil.
Sign up it's the picket line or the parade
Our lives

* * *

On the other side of the country Liz sat in her living room above the Crashdown with her parents cheering Max, Michael, and Alex on. Time and time again she would find herself focusing solely on Max as he sang. He looked so happy as he was blaring out the lyrics and strumming his guitar.

Her crush on him had never left, even though she had barely seen him in almost a year. But with all the beautiful women he must be getting now, she thought it was impossible for Max to ever love her with her plain brown hair and brown eyes.

The performance was over and Mr. And Mrs. Parker both stood up. “I can’t believe how wonderful they’re doing.” Mrs. Parker said with a bright smile.

“Yea, they were totally rocking.” Mr. Parker agreed and Liz looked up, completely disgusted.

“Dad, never say that again, for the sake of my sanity.” Liz joked.

Mr. Parker raised his hands in a sign of defeat. “I won’t. I promise.” He said while laughing. He then left the room to go the restaurant with Mrs. Parker and Liz got up and went to her room.

Liz sat on her bed and pulled out the scrapbook that Max gave her right before he left Roswell. She missed him so much and it made her cringe to think about all the girls who would throw themselves at him.

She sighed and flipped through the book, lost in her nostalgia.

posted on 23-Jul-2002 6:27:04 PM by Alexandra86
Author’s note: I was thinking about how long I wanted this fiction to be, and I decided that I wanted it to be short. So, there won’t be more than 10 or 15 parts to this fic. Also, thanks so much for the feedback...I really appreciate it!

Part Two

Max high-fived Alex and Michael when they went entered their five star hotel room, celebrating their awesome performance.

“Flawless.” Alex said, smiling. “We’ve never done anything less.”

“You mean, except for the time your pants split during the performance in Arizona?” Michael supplied while laughing, remembering Alex’s bright red face.

Alex turned red. “Um, yea. Asshole.”

Michael laughed harder. “Don’t be embarrassed. It will happen to everyone, but me, since I sit down during the shows.” Trying not to embarrass his friend too much.

Alex said something under his breath and threw a pillow, which landed on Michael’s head.

Max smiled at his friends banter. “Don’t worry Alex, it’ll happen to me.” He said while laughing.

He appreciated their friendship. Through all the things they went through, Alex and Michael had been there. Even Liz hadn’t been with him during the harder stuff, like when the band had to do two shows in one night.

“You two suck.” Alex said, finally starting to laugh. Even though the group of them had fought sometimes, he really appreciated the close friendship they had. They were his family.

The hotel room telephone rang and Michael reached over and picked it up. “Hello?” he asked.

“Hey Michael, put me on speaker phone.” There manager, Jonathan answered.

“Alright.” Michael responded. He pushed the speakerphone button and hung up the receiver.

“You’re all here?” Jonathan asked.

“Yea.” Alex, Max, and Michael responded.

“Okay, good. I have good news and bad news.” Jonathan started. “I’m going to give you the good news first. You’re album has just reached platinum.”

With that news, the room exploded in happy cheers. Max, Michael, and Alex were all giving each other high fives and shouting in happiness.

“Okay, okay, now for the bad news.” Jonathan shouted, trying to get their attention.

The room quieted and their celebrating had abruptly stopped.

“Apparently, it was leaked out which hotel you all were staying in and outside your windows, there’s a huge crowd of people, girls and guys. Now, we’re going to find away to get you out of there. I’ll call back in ten minutes.” He said, and hung up.

Max, Alex, and Michael looked at each other and at the same time they ran towards the windows. When they looked out, they saw a crowd of at least five hundred people.

“This is making me feel like the fucking Backstreet Boys.” Michael said, while walking away from the window and hanging up the phone.

“Never, ever again compare us to them.” Alex told Michael with a smirk. “We are cooler, remember that.”

The all chuckled and began gathering their bags, so they would be prepared to leave.

“I wonder how we’re going to get out of here unnoticed?” Max asked.

“Dude, this is the five star hotel, they’ve probably got trap doors and shit all over the place.” Alex said, laughing.

“Maybe they’ll let us go back home soon?” Max asked.

“So you can see Liz?” Michael asked, smirking.

Max blushed. “So I can see my family, and Liz…”

Alex and Michael laughed. “You’re so predictable Max.” Michael said. “Dude, just ask her out.

Max’s face blushed a deeper red. “She probably has a boyfriend by now.”

“And hasn’t told you about it yet?” Alex asked incredulously. “Yea, that would happen when hell freezes over. Liz tells you everything and you tell her everything.”

“Okay, yea, thanks for the input, but I happen to remember two girls that you both like.”

That shut Alex and Michael up. “You’re evil Max.” Alex quipped.

Before they could continue their banter, the phone rang and it was Jonathan, preparing them for the haste exit.

* * *

Liz walked in the school the next day and immediately heard everyone whispering about Max, Michael, and Alex’s amazing performance at TRL.

It never amazed her less to believe how famous they really were. But they had deserved it, because she remembered how hard they had worked. Liz reached her locker and turned the combination.

“Hey Liz!” She heard from behind her. It was Isabel and Maria, two of her best friends. Isabel was tall with long blonde hair and Maria was short, although taller than her, with medium length blonde hair.

“Hey girls.” Liz said smiling.

“I swear, Tess Harding is only five minutes from giving me her panties so I can pass it along to Max.” Isabel grumbled. Tess had been harassing her since Young America’s first song came on the radio.

“I guess she’s a band ho.” Maria supplied, which caused all of them to start laughing.

“My parents are so proud of Max and Michael, and of course Alex too.” Isabel continued. “You should have seen them yesterday while watching TRL, they were so excited, since that was the first live performance they’ve seen. Well, almost live.”

“Yea, my parents were too.” Liz said. Liz finished getting her books from her locker and they began walking towards their first period English class, which they all shared.

“So, it’s final the Crashdown is catering the 10th annual Crash fest.”

Maria smiled. “Cool, my mom is helping out with that. She’s also doing some decorating for the stage where Michael, Max, and Alex will play.”

When they got to the class, they sat in the back away from everyone else. They weren’t trying to be snobby; it was just that if they sat closer to the rest of the class they would be harassed by people constantly asking them about Max, Michael, and Alex.

“Liz, you really need to tell Max how you feel.” Maria whispered suddenly. Liz blushed slightly, she had told Maria and Isabel how she felt about Max and they were trying to subtly hook them up.

“Yea, she’s right Liz…you’re the only person that I would ever trust my brother with.”

Liz made a face. “Okay, then why don’t you both tell Michael and Alex how you two feel?” She smirked.

“Alex, probably has hundreds of other girls throwing themselves at him. He doesn’t need me.” Isabel shifted uncomfortably.

“So does Michael.” Maria said quietly.

“Now do you two see my dilemma?” Liz said pointedly.

Maria and Isabel nodded. “Fine,” Maria grumbled. “But Max is totally in love with you. And I know you know that.”

Liz rolled her eyes and covered her face with her hands. “You two are something else.”

* * * *

Liz sat on her bed, once again looking at her and Max’s scrapbook. He was coming home in four more days and she couldn’t wait till he was back.

And she was finally going to tell him how she felt.

After what Isabel and Maria had said earlier, she figured that she would just have to come clean with her feelings, before he found some beautiful girl and it would be too late. And she couldn’t live knowing that she never tried to fight for the guy of her dreams.

She closed the scrapbook and took out a piece of paper.

Dear Max,

posted on 23-Jul-2002 8:05:47 PM by Alexandra86
Yes, I will plead guilty for shamelessy bumping my fic.
posted on 12-Aug-2002 3:20:27 PM by Alexandra86
Thanks for the feedback! I'm going to update this in a few days *happy*

posted on 23-Aug-2002 4:07:18 PM by Alexandra86
I was finally able to squeeze a new part out of my system. Thanks for all the feedback, I really appreciate it *happy*


Part 3

“Home…finally!” Alex exclaimed as the pilot announced the planes upcoming landing in Roswell, New Mexico. He wanted to jump up and down in happiness. After nearly a year traveling around the country, he was finally going to see his parents and friends face to face again.

Michael tried hard to hide his excitement. Even though his parents had passed away a long time ago, he still loved being in Roswell. Diane and Philip had treated him like he was their own son. And Max and Isabel treated him like they were really siblings. Plus, he couldn’t wait to see Spitfire, or Maria, as she was more commonly known as.

Max sat, listening to Incubus, trying to get his mind of his excitement. He missed Roswell, his family, friends, and of course Liz, like crazy. He wouldn’t have much time with them though, the next day he had to play at the crash festival and most of this day was going to be spent doing rehearsals.

Max looked up when he felt Alex tapping his shoulder and saw Jonathan trying to get their attention from his seat in front of them. Max took off his headphones and listened to what Jonathan had to say.

“Okay guys, since Roswell has no great hotels.” Jonathan said with a grimace. He hated this alien themed town. He’d only been once and that one time nearly drove him insane. He didn’t know how the guys in the band could stand it. “You’re going to be staying with your families.” He continued. “Max, your dad is going to be picking you all up from the airport. I’ll be staying in a house that the record company rented, so if you need me, you’ll be able to reach me on my cell.” He finished.

Alex, Michael, and Max all nodded, showing that they had been listening. “Okay.” They each answered, eager to get home.

Soon, the plane landed and they put on their hats and sunglasses and walked off the plane. Immediately they saw Philip and moved towards him.

“Hey dad.” Max said, with a smile.

“Hey son!” Philip replied excitedly. He gave Max a hug and turned towards Alex and Michael and did the same. “You guys okay?” He asked.

They nodded. “Yea, everything is fine Mr. Evans.” Alex responded.

“Okay then.” Philip said, clapping his hands together. “We’ll go to the car now.”

They all followed Philip towards the car, not stopping for their luggages, since they would all be delivered to their homes.

“OH MY GOD!” They heard someone scream. The whole lobby in the airport turned to hear the scream. The blonde girl that screamed who looked about twenty, came running up to the band.

“You’re Young America!” She shouted. With that, more people came up to them, pulling out pens and papers.

Philip watched on in surprise as Max, Michael, and Alex signed as many autographs that they could.

The girl who had screamed stood stunned. She couldn’t believe that Young America was right in front of her. She came to this stupid town and now on the day she left she finally saw her favorite band.

She saw that they were about to leave the crowd and did the only thing she could do to grab their attention.

She lifted her shirt. “SIGN MY BOOBS!!”

A collective gasp went around and Philip went into action and pulled the boys away from them and walked quickly towards the car.

Once they were inside the car and on the highway Philip took a second to calm down. “Uh, does that happen a lot?” He asked.

“Unfortunately, no, it doesn’t.” Alex responded, laughing. The others guys laughed and Philip relaxed.

“That was…strange.” Philip said.

“So, is everyone at home?” Max asked, hoping to change the subject.

“Of course.” Philip responded. “They’re all at our house right now. Your parents are there too, Alex.”

Alex nodded. “Cool.”

The rest of the car ride was silent. As they got closer to home, the boys got more excited that they were finally going to see their families and friends again.

* * * *

Liz touched her pocket once again to make sure the letter she wrote was still there. She had been doing it the last half hour since she had originally left her house to come to the Evans’.

Everyone here was in a celebration mood, but Liz was close to hyperventilating. After all the years of crushing on Max, she was finally going to tell him how she felt and that scared her to death.

What if he had a girlfriend already? What if he didn’t want to be tied down to one girl while he was out on the road? The possible outcomes were endless and the thought of putting her heart out on the line was scary.

“Liz?” Maria asked, worried about her friend. She had looked nervous and flustered the whole day.

Liz looked up from the spot on the floor she was staring at. “Yea?”

“You okay? You look upset.” Maria asked softly.

Liz nodded slowly. “Yea, yea…I’m fine.”

Maria cocked her head to the side and smirked. “Chica, you lie horribly.” She paused for a second. “Is this about Max?”

Liz rolled her eyes. “I’m that obvious?”

“Unfortunately.” Maria responded.

“I’m scared Maria.” Liz moaned.

“Why are you scared?” Maria asked curiously.

“I was going to tell Max about how I feel, but I don’t want to put myself on the line like that. What if he rejects me? If he does, then life will just be a lot more complicated and we would be awkward around each other and won’t be best friends anymore.” Liz said sadly. “I want all, but I don’t want nothing, you know?”

Maria nodded. “Yea, I know. But Liz, sometimes in life you have to take chances…and it’s not as if Max doesn’t like you…”

“What?” Liz asked, wondering if Maria was being honest.

Maria scoffed. “Oh please. Max is totally head over heels in love with you and has been since we were kids. You just never noticed, but we all did.”

“I don’t know…” Liz trailed off uncertainly.

“Okay, that’s it. How about this…if you don’t tell him, I will.” Maria said angrily.

Liz gasped. “You wouldn’t.”

Maria nodded. “Sorry sweetie, but I would. Now get off the shy train and go get your man.”

“But Maria-“

“No, buts. You love him and he loves you. Go for it.”

Liz sighed. “I’m just scared.”

Maria softened as she saw Liz’s dejected expression. “I know you are, but love is about putting yourself on the line. It’s about taking chances. If you don’t take the chance then you’ll live you’re whole life wondering what if. That’s not a good way to live. No one should live like that.”

“Thank you Maria.” Liz said quietly.

“You welcome babe.”

“I think they’re here!” Diane, Max’s mom exclaimed. Sure enough you could here doors slamming as people got out of a car.

Seconds later the door opened and in walked in Philip, Michael, Alex, and Max. They were greeted by big hugs by their families.

Liz stood quietly in the background and hugged Michael and Alex as they walked past her.

Finally Max stood in front of her, as the other people went into the living room.

“Hi Max.” Liz said shyly. “It’s been awhile.”

Max nodded. “Yea, it has. I missed my best friend.” He said with a smile.

“Max!” Philip called from the living room. “Come in here and tell your mother about what happened at the airport!”

“Coming!” Max yelled back, facing the living room. He looked at Liz.

“We’ll talk later, right?”

Liz nodded and smiled. “Right.”

Max left and Liz let out the sigh she was holding in. Smoothing down her shirt, she walked behind Max into the living room.

posted on 11-Sep-2002 4:55:43 PM by Alexandra86
My prayers are to everyone who lost someone and the souls who were lost, September 11, 2001. You'll be in my hearts on this tragic anniversary.