Trailer Trash is Another Man’s Treasure.

Author: KryptonKitty
Rating: R for language I guess
Disclaimer: I don’t own anything in this story which has a copyright. Roswell, for example.
Summary: Basically Kyle,Liz, Maria, and Alex live in a trailer park where our favorite aliens crash. From there it’s pretty much what you make of it.


Howling Coyote Trailer Park, on the outskirts of Roswell, July 2002, 11:30 PM


“Liz! Get in here and clean this living room!” Jeff Parker yelled out the door of his doublewide. It was her week to clean and she’d been neglecting it all week.

Liz sighed and rolled her eyes, “Okay Dad!” she said wishing he wouldn’t do that when she was talking to her friends Maria, Alex, and her crush Sean. “God he seriously needs to look into Prozac.” Liz sighed under her breath as she jumped off the old picnic table in the outdated trailer park in the desert.

“Better get in there chica” Maria said hitting Liz on the butt playfully to get her going. “Alright. I’ll be right back guys.”

“We’ll be right here, where else can we go?” Maria asked.

“Into the city, without giving me one last thought.” Liz said smiling.

“That is a thought..” Alex said scratching his head as in thought. “Don’t leave me! I’ll only take like 20 minutes tops, the “livingchen” is so small I don’t know why he stresses over it so bad.” Liz said used her term for the combination kitchen/living room.

“LIZ!”

“Shit. Bye guys!” she said running to her trailer.

Maria shook her head teasingly “Bye girl.”

“That’s a plus.” Alex said from out of the blue.

“Huh? What are you talking about? What’s a plus?”

“Living in a trailer means that the chores are cut down to the max.” Alex said.

“Yeah, I guess you’d be right there, my man. It doesn’t take me but a second to clean my room, let alone the whole trailer.” Maria said suddenly feeling good about her plight.

“Yup. We got it good.” Alex said dryly, trying to raise his spirit. He hated living in a trailer, so whenever he thought of a plus, he’d write it down.

“I’ve got to get out of here.” Maria said pounding her head on the picnic table and wincing when a paint chip scratched her head. “Ouch.” She said picking it off her skin.

“Take me with you.” Alex said looking up at the sky. There had to be someplace out there for him besides Roswell, New Mexico’s “finest trailer park.”

*********************

“Zan this is stupid. Why are we going to earth again? We’re gonna make complete fools out of ourselves!” Vilandra complained to her brother, the heir to Antar’s throne.

Zan let out a long, drawn out sigh. His sister could be such a pain in the ass sometimes. “Relax ok? There is not going to be another repeat of the ’47 incident in Roswell ok? We’re going to Arizona.”

“Better not be. Ever since then our planet’s been the laughing stock of the Alliance! We’ve got to restore our honor back in the universe.”

“Those other 4 planets are losers anyway,” Rath commented, joining his 2 friends with his sister, Ava accompanying him. “Drepla, Tkalé, Garza, and Lumis are all just jealous of us. Despite, the thing in ‘47
Antar is by far the richer planet, and they just need an excuse to look down on our people.” Rath said venting. He too, was determined not to screw this up.

“It’ll be a snap right?” Ava asked, “All we have to do is land undetected and resume the mission from where it left off in 1947 right?” she asked as if that task were nothing.

“Yeah Ava. That’s all.” Vilandra said in a snide tone, knowing Ava’d pick up on it. “Shut up you little!…” Ava said going for Lonnie’s head. Rath grabbed her though, and prevented her from reaching her destination. Lonnie stuck her tongue out at Ava in a human gesture. This made Ava’s blood boil even more and she struggled to get away from her brother’s strong arms.

“Stop it you two!” Zan said firmly. “She started it.” Ava mumbled begrudgingly. “This is not the way the Royal Four behave, especially the Crown Princess and future Queen.” Max said trying to reason with them.
Just then the alarm sounded.

“ALERT! ALERT! ALERT! CRASH IS EMMINENT. CRASH IS EMMINENT…”

Vilandra stomped her foot. “Not again!!”

Zan quickly set coordinates for Arizona. They were rejected. Too far. So he set them closer. To Roswell, New Mexico. It took the coordinates, just enough fuel left to make it coincidentally.

“What the hell hit us??” Zan asked.

“Damn Earthling satellite!” Rath said scanning the outside.

“We’re never gonna live this down..” Zan muttered under his breath, waiting for Loni’s eminent “I told you so.”

“I told you this was a bad idea! Does anybody ever listen to good old Vilandra? NO!”

“Loni! Please that is not helping.” Rath said bracing himself for impact.

“Shut up Rath” She said strapping herself into a chair.

“Here we go again.” Ava said quietly to herself as she braced for impact, listening to Rath and Loni fight. Who ever thought of putting those two together? Marriage and those two shouldn’t be allowed, but that was just the way it was. She looked at Zan. The Future King of Antar, she’d be his queen. The thought didn’t ease her mind much though.

**********************
Jeff Parker was busy at work on his computer. He didn’t work for SETI anymore, but he still liked to check things out in outer space. There had been a lot of activity within the last half hour. He was picking up an unidentified signal.

“Still looking for little green men?” his daughter said startling him.

“Sure.” He said smiling uneasily as he casually closed the laptop.

“Don’t stay up too late with that ok? Geez, if only you could be like normal fathers and watch football games.”
“Don’t hold your breath Lizzie.” He said smiling genuinely this time.

“I won’t. I finished cleaning so I’m going to find Maria and Alex.”

“Have fun.”

“I will”

Once his daughter was out of sight he resumed his work. The signal was strong now, Less than a minute away. If only Jeff could locate it. He hit his forehead and realized he could. He typed in his request and waited for it to load.

25%, 75%, 85%.. Almost there.. 95, 97.. The power went off suddenly . He’d lost all his data.

“Damn!” he cursed to himself.
**************

“Got any 6’s?” Liz asked looking at Alex.

“Go fish.”

“This is lame.” Maria blurted out blatantly.

“I know. I fold.” Alex said throwing down his hand.

“Me too.” Maria followed suit.

“Me three.” Liz said throwing down her cards and stretching her limbs.

“What do we do now?” Maria asked as she played with one of her shoelaces. The lights flickered off leaving the trio in darkness. “That was weird.” Maria said continuing to play with her lace.

“Scream like hillbilly trash” Alex answered.

“What?” Maria said remarking to her friend’s oddball response.

“Look at the sky Maria.” Liz said in a serious tone.

“AAAAAAAHHHH!!!”

Alex immediately covered her mouth. “Shh! You’ll wake up the whole trailer park!” Alex said trying to calm her down.

“What in the hell was that I could have swore it was a--” Maria started her voice full of panic.

“Flying saucer.” Liz finished.

“Yeah. So what should we do? Call the National Enquirer? NBC? CBS? This could be big, what if they want to eat our brains or something, and we could all be in danger--”

“Maria!” Alex and Liz said at the same time.

“Just saying.” She said quietly.

“I’m sure it couldn’t be a…” she let her words trail off not wanting to say “flying saucer”, “It’s probably just a meteor or something.” Liz said rationally. “Let’s just go check it out and--”

“You crazy?” Maria said

“Maria. I’m going to prove to you that’s it’s not aliens. Come on, there’s no such thing.”

“I guess you’re right.” She said calming down a bit more.

“Let’s go check it out ok?” Alex said grabbing Maria’s hand in a sign of reassurance.

“Ok.” She said confidently. But her hand was shaking.

************

“10 seconds till impact. 9,8,7…” the ships’ on board computer said coolly as if it were forecasting the weather. Right now things were about as bad as a Tkalian “independent movie”.

“Hang on!” Max said strapping himself into his chair.

“Duh.” Loni said always the snapdragon.


“6,5,4…”

“We have to find a better mode of transportation when this is all over.” Michael said still thinking about the humiliation the other planets in the Alliance would dish out.

“That’s for sure.”

“3,2,1” They crashed into the earth, hopefully secluded from human’s prying eyes. “Is it over?” Loni asked a little disappointed, she was expecting more of a bump than that, not that it wasn’t a big bump she was just expecting more.

“Thankfully.” Ava said turning pale. “I have to regurgitate.” She said holding her stomach. “Not regurgitate Ava, you say ‘I have to throw up’ or ‘I have to vomit’, ‘hurl” maybe, but regurgitate is not what the humans say when they have to…”

“Thanks for the Earth English lesson Loni, but I really need to throw up..” Ava said opening the ships’ doors with her hand. It was encoded to respond to her DNA as well as Zan, Loni, and Rath’s DNA. She ran out and beside the ship she, um.. Well you know, blew chunks.

“That’s ugly.” Rath said holding back his sister’s hair. Loni surveyed the secluded area. The forest seemed out of place with the desert around them. “See anyone Zan?” she asked .

“No, I think we might have went unnoticed.”

“Thank God. No human complications.”

“Oww!!”

“Did you hear that?” Loni asked tuning her ears to find the location of the foreign sound. “Yeah, I think it’s coming form over there.” Zan said looking to a big bush of sorts.

“I think you’re right. Rath, Ava. Come over here.” Zan said pointing to the bush.

********************

“That’s ugly.” A wild haired brunette boy, that looked about the 3 teens’ age said as he held a platinum blonde’s hair back from her face.

“Cute.” Maria commented of the boy.

“What, throwing up?” Alex said.

“No stupid, that guy over there.”

“Shh! Listen!” Liz said putting a finger to Maria’s lips. They’d missed a little of the stranger’s dialogue.

“No, I think we went unnoticed” another attractive brunette male said to a more natural looking blonde.

“Thank God. No human complications.” The blonde girl remarked.

“Human complications?” Alex asked. “I knew it!! They’re aliens!! I bet they’re coming to enslave out planet or something!”

“Maria!” Alex pinched her. “Oww!!” she screamed.

“Thanks now they’ve noticed us.” Liz said scolding both her friends.

“It’s not my fault, he pinched me the bastard!”

“Just trying to quiet you down airhead!”

“Shut up! They’re coming this way, we have to go!”

They all got up immediately and started to run but it was too late. They’d been discovered.

“Going somewhere?” the platinum blonde said raising an eyebrow.

TBC IF anyone likes it.... Feedback please?