posted on 9-Aug-2002 2:22:28 PM by Dream Lover MerJ
Author:  MerJ and Rach (Mystical Light ML 4ever)

Summary:  Liz's life has gone into a downward spiral and the only one who may be able to help her is Max.

Category:  M/L - CC

Rating:  Pg-13 to possible R

Disclaimer:  The characters of Roswell do not belong to me.  Jakob and Joel, however do.  Lyrics to "Somewhere in Between" and "Quasimodo" belong to the band Lifehouse.

Spoilers:  Possibly S1 and S2 - AU fic.

Author's Note:  This fic is based on Liz's POV.  Neither of us are very good at those fics, but we just really like them.  Also, this fic is very personal for myself (Rach), even though at times it may seem I don't know what I'm talking about, because, I probably don't.  I don't know how to go about the whole drug scene, so bear with me, kay?

Title:  Somewhere in Between

***

Sigh. Beta still needed. Check out Fanfic Discussion board, if interested.

***

I can't be losing sleep over this
No I can't
And now I cannot stop pacing
Give me a few hours
I'll have this all sorted out
If my mind would just stop racing

Cause I cannot stand still
I can't be this unsturdy
This cannot be happening

This is over my head
But underneath my feet
Cause by tomorrow morning I'll have this thing beat
And everything will be back to the way that it was
I wish that it was just that easy

Cause I'm waiting for tonight
Been waiting for tomorrow
I'm somewhere in between
What is real
and just a dream
What is real
and just a dream
What is real
and just a dream

Would you catch me if I fall out of what I fell in
Don't be surprised if I collapse down at your feet again
I don't want to run away from this
I know that I just don't need this

Cause I cannot stand still
I can't be this unsturdy
This cannot be happening

Cause I'm waiting for tonight
Been waiting for tomorrow
And I'm somewhere in between
What is real
and just a dream
What is real
and just a dream
What is real
and just a dream
What is real and just a dream

"Somewhere in Between" - Lifehouse

***

Part One

It became a habit for me to start to wait up for him.  He'd come home every night at the same time, and I'd be the only person he wakes up.  He never seemed to learn that mom locks the door after him and that he should invest in the lock picking business so that I can get some sleep.

I can hear the ladder squeak upon his ascent and I'm tempted to climb back through my window and pretend I don't hear his insistent knocking.  However, I'm a light sleeper, and he knows it.

I see his head of dark hair appear above the edge and I slam the key down on it's surface, gaining satisfaction in his startled look.

"Keep this one so you don't have to bother me anymore,"  I say, hoping he'll descend back down the ladder and out of my sight.

But I'm not that lucky.  He smirks and hops over the edge.  I can smell the beer on his breath.

"What did mom say?"  he asks me and makes himself comfortable on my lounge chair.

"That she's going to send you to dad's if you don't straighten up,"  I try to sound threatening but he's heard it all before.

He waves off my comment.  "Dad wouldn't be able to do anything and she knows it,"  he sighs and stands.  "She really needs to come up with something better than that,"

He moves towards the ladder again and I heave in a sigh of relief.  Then, he takes a detour and drapes an arm around my shoulder.

"You know, Liz,"  he starts and I can smell the pot on his clothes.  Instinctively, I pinch my nose closed, he gets a chuckle out of this.  "When you start doing this,"  he motions to himself, I guess implying his habit.  "Which I know you will, because of peer pressure and all that.  You should do it with me, it'll be like, a brother and sister bonding.  You want us to bond, don't ya Liz?"

Yeah.

"No, now get out,"  I say instead.

"I am out,"

I roll my eyes and give him a shove towards the ladder again.  He finally descends and enters him room in the basement.  He always wanted that space down there, with the door exiting into the alleyway.  That should have been mom's first clue.

I climb back through my window and crawl under my cool sheets.

I'll never be like him.

***

Three Months Later

I bound down the steps of our apartment, taking the steps two at a time.  I had just finished my shift at my mother's diner, The Crashdown, and I went upstairs to change.  Jakob, Joel, and I are going to a party at Eddie Murphy's place.

His house is huge, his parents are rich, and are always seeking time away from their troubled son - effectively giving him the leverage to throw his killer parties.  Beer, pot, sex. It's killer - literally.

Upon entering the diner the buzzing of my conversing peers drifts towards me.  Almost everyone from high school is packed into our small diner. I'm glad I never hang around here.

My high school has your typical cliques.  The populars, Consisting of jocks, cheerleaders, and their friends.  The nerds, 'nuff said.  The loners, they never really hang out with the same people, they value their privacy.  (I used to be in that group, blending in with my surroundings, being invisible)  And of course the Druggies - joined that group three months ago, thanks to my brother and my awesome boyfriend Joel.

Speaking of which, where the hell are they?

Groaning, I seat myself on the stool at the counter.  The smooth, cool, surface is covered with tacky looking alien heads with beady black eyes.  The same design covers the tables around me.  Green aliens in space suits are painted on the walls - courtesy of Maria DeLuca's mother, Amy.  Maria is a firecracker and is in the "popular crowd" only because of her friendship with Alex Whitman, and her relationship with Michael Guerin.  Come to think of it, Alex is only popular because his relationship with Isabel - Miss Ice Queen - who is only popular because of her brother Max, as well as Michael.

Huh.  

Ah, well, I'm sure Max is only popular because of his friendship with Kyle Valenti, who is only popular because he's the Sheriff's son.  Oh, and his relationships with Tess Harding, who is only popular - with the guys at least - because of the magic of silicon.

Well, then. That's interesting.  I bet I can take the entire popular group and link them all together to one person.  Who is most likely, either Tess Harding - Miss Look-at-my-boobs-that-grew-miraculously-in-two-weeks, or Pam Troy, whose father is the richest man in Roswell.  Hell, New Mexico.

Wait, how'd I get on this topic?  'Cuse me while I back track....

"That has got to be the ugliest face I've ever seen you make, Liz,"  my brother Jakob jerked me from my thoughts.  "Something got you confused?"

"Huh?  What?"

"You looked like this,"  he demonstrates by pinching his face together.  "And you looked really confused,"

"Nuh, uh,"  I retort lamely.

He quirks an eyebrow and then looks around.  "Joel a no show?"  he asks and takes a seat next to me.

I shrug.  My boyfriend is always late.  Sigh.  My boyfriend.  I like him.  A lot.  He may not be popular, but he one of the most desired guys in WRH.  Next of course, to Max Evans.

My gaze shifts to him then, and to my surprise, he's looking right at me.  We have a staring contest for a few moments, him probably thinking that I am the biggest loser to walk the planet, while I take in his handsome features.  His adorably large dumbo ears, his soft yet deep, amber eyes, his strong jaw and neck.  His broad, large shoulders extending downwards to long strong arms, that could easily wrap around me, twice.  His strong che-

Wait a minute, back up.  Was I thinking of him wrapping his arms around me?  Dude, Joel.  Me.  Me and Joel.  We're a couple.  We'll probably be voted as most unusual couple, but we're a couple none the less.  

The chime above the door rings and I look over to see boyfriend.  He's tall with dirty blonde hair and a lean, yet muscular body.  His arms are longer than his torso, which easily wraps around me as well, and he doesn't have dumbo ears like a certain someone.

He walks towards me with a smile he only gives me.  Placing his hands on the counter on either side of me, his kisses the tip of my nose.

"Hey,"  he says softly and I smell of a beer he already drank.  It took me a while to get used to it, but now the smell is a bit.....Comforting.

"Hey,"  I reply back, kissing him on his chin.

Jakob, who had turned his head from our public display of affection, was now tapping his fingers anxiously on his the countertop.  "We ready to go yet?"  he asks impatiently.

Joel tugs me to my feet, his arms wrapping around my waist.  "Yeah, I'm ready to roll,"

"Great, let's go,"  Jakob leads the way out, and Joel and I follow.

For some reason, unknown to me, I glance over my shoulder at Max. He's watching me again.  Turning back around I look at Joel's profile and smile. He's all I need.

***

I stumble down the steps of Eddie's porch, a beer bottle hanging loosely in my hand.  Just as expected, the place was packed, music was blaring, and smoke filled the air.  Strange how a place like that used to be a place you'd never go, but alas, peer pressure gets the best of us, right?  Especially when your brother happens to be one of them.

I manage to make it off the porch still standing. It's 2 am, and time to go home.  Most of the crowd has already dispersed, while others are laying sprawled out unconscious on Eddie's lawn, or in his house.  

Drink responsibly, kiddies.

I feel someone ram into me, almost knocking my already unsteady form to the ground.  Turning around to punch this guys lights out, I come face to face with my bro.  Joel staggering behind him.

"Liz, you cool to drive?"  Jakob asks me. He's holding to my shoulders tightly while he tries to stand up straight.

I take another swig of my beer.   "You bet,"  I answer and grab the keys from his hands.  I push the unlock button and go to open the door.

It won't budge.

I push it again, and try to open it.

Nothing.

"Liz,"  Joel says.  His voice some where behind me.   "This is our car,"

"Oh,"  I say dumbly and turn wearily around.

I climb into the driver's seat, start the ignition, and speed down the road.

***

TBC?

Feedback Please.

Now, I know this isn't very good compared to the rest of the wonderfully written POV fics, but we like to write them anyway. Constructive feedback encouraged.



[ edited 4 time(s), last at 13-Aug-2002 4:58:24 PM ]
posted on 10-Aug-2002 12:05:01 PM by Dream Lover MerJ
Author: MerJ and Rach

Summary: Liz's life has gone into a downward spiral and the only one who may be able to help her is Max.

Category: M/L - CC

Rating: Pg-13 to possible R

Disclaimer: The characters of Roswell do not belong to me. Jakob and Joel, however do. Lyrics to "Somewhere in Between" and "Quasimodo" belong to the band Lifehouse.

Spoilers: Possibly S1 and S2 - AU fic.

Author's Note: This fic is based on Liz's POV. Neither of us are very good at those fics, but we just really like them. Also, this fic is very personal for myself (Rach), even though at times it may seem I don't know what I'm talking about, because, I probably don't. I don't know how to go about the whole drug scene, so bear with me, kay?

Title: Somewhere in Between

***

Rapunzel - hey, we thank you for the feedback, and we're glad you like it. Thanks.
RoswellLady - lol thanks! Cute bumps!
clueless - Hehe we're glad you're hooked, thanks for the fb.
salonica - Hmm, you may be right. Thanks for the fb.
roswellluver - Haha, you may be right also, thaks for the fb!
JaneLane - Thanks for the fb!

***

Part Two

I wake up to the sound of shrill beeping and voices all around me.  I can't make anything out, my ears are buzzing.  My vision is blurry and the figures around me are unrecognizable.  Pain is coursing through my entire body.  

That I feel.

I let out an agonizing moan and shut my eyes, welcoming the darkness.

***

When I awake the second time, I'm vaguely aware of the stroking of fingers on my hand.  I let the comforting feeling soothe me a moment longer before I grip them into my hand.  A cloudy form hovers over me then and I blink to bring it into focus.

My mother's pain filled eyes bore into mine and I can tell something is wrong.  Terribly wrong.

"Honey bear,"  she whispers softly.  Her other hand lifted to stroke my head.   "How do you feel?"

Terrible.  I feel nothing but pain. There's something wrapped around my neck, my ribs hurt, as well as my left leg, but I don't tell her this.  Her expression tells me she already knows.

"What happened?"  I ask instead.

Her eyes cloud with tears and I tighten my grip on her hand.   "Mom?"

"Shh,"  she soothed and licked her parched lips.   "You were in an accident, sweetie.  You lost control of the car and drove into a tree,"

I squeeze my eyes tightly shut.  "Oh, God,"  I moan.  That was Joel's prized possession.  He spent years of working at the auto shop to buy that car.  I bet it's totaled  

Joel.

"How's Joel?"  I ask, afraid of the answer.

"He's fine, a few bumps and scratches, but he's fine,"

I heave in a sigh of relieft, ignoring the pain it caused.  "And Jakob?"  my eyes flutter shut as I ask this.  

The stroking of her hand on my head stops for a moment, and then starts up again.  I can feel her hand shaking.  My eyes shoot open.  Tears are rolling heavily down Mom's cheek and my stomach clenches at the sight.   "Mom?"

"Jakob died, sweetie,"  her voice was hoarse.   "He died before the ambulance could get there,"

"What?"  I whisper.  No, it can't be true.  "Jakob's dead?"

A sob escapes her lips.   "I'm so sorry sweetie, I'm so sorry,"  she mumbles and drops her head to my shoulder.

My arms instinctively go around her and I cling tightly to her.  "Jakob's dead," was the only thing ringing through my mind.  I killed him.  Oh God, it shouldn't have been him.  It should have been me.

At that moment, I prayed to God that he would let me die.  I couldn't bear to live without my brother.

"Am I going to die?"  I ask, my throat raw.

Another sob racks my mother's body and my stomach clenches again.  I can't believe I did this to her.  She lifts herself over me and starts stroking my head again.

"No, sweetie, you're going to be okay,"

I shut my eyes tightly again, wishing that I wasn't okay.  Maybe I have some internal bleeding that the doctor's don't know of.  Maybe I'm dying right now.

I let sob after painful sob rack my body as I cling to my mother again.

What have I done?

***

So, my neck is sprained, three of my ribs are broken, and my leg is broken in two places.  All in all, I think I did okay, considering the situation I put my brother in.

I won't be able to go to the funeral, I'll be stuck in this hospital bed. That's all right, I don't really want to go.  I really don't like to cry in public.  Even though, I don't think I'll be able to shed a single tear, I'm drained.

My mother really hasn't left my side since I woke up, I finally persuaded her to go home, rest up and shower, because she smelled.

I hear foot steps outside of my room, and then his figure appears in the doorway.

Joel.

I smile, despite the pain it causes from the slight bruising on my cheek.  My heart twists painfully at the sight of him.  His face is pale and a jagged slash was on his cheek from the corner of his eye to the corner of his mouth.  His arm was wrapped in white gauze and the blood seeping through was very noticeable.

He walked towards me until he was sitting on the edge of my bed.  His hand found mine and he brought it to his lips.

"Hi,"  I whisper softly.  I like him.

"Hi,"  he forces out.   "I can't stay long,"

I nod, simply glad he came.  I can tell he's struggling with something.  He doesn't know what to say to me, and truth be told, I don't know what to say to him either.  I could have killed him.  I squeeze his hand tightly, trying to give us both strength.

"I need to talk to you,"  his voice sounds so small and frail.  I've never heard him sound this way before.

Despite my fears, I give a nod, urging him to continue.

"I can't see you anymore,"

My heart falls from my chest.  Way to cut to the chase there, Joel.

"Mom's moving me to Clovis,"  he continued.

"Because she doesn't want you around me,"  It was a statement.  I didn't need to question it, I knew she was moving because of me.

He did nothing to justify my answer, however.   "Joel?"

Joel stands abruptly, stuffing his good hand in his pocket.   "Yes,"  he answers with an affirmative nod.   "Because you're a bad influence on me, she says,"  He laughs a bit and I know he's thinking about the irony of the situation.  HE was the one who influenced ME.  He facial features softens as he looks at me.   "I'm so sorry, Liz,"

I refuse to meet his gaze, instead, I pick lint from my blanket.   "I understand,"  was all I said.  He was sorry for many reasons, not just for having to leave me.

"I should go now,"  he mutters softly after a moment of silence.  I nod again, my gaze still transfixed on the lint I was rolling between my fingers.  I didn't dare look at him.

"Goodbye, Liz,"

Once I knew he was gone, I let another tear slide down my cheek.   "Goodbye, Joel,"

***

Goodbye, Joel.

Goodbye, Jakob.

My heart aches for the loss of both of them, but I hurt far worse for my brother.

I killed him.

That's something no sibling ever wants to admit.  But at least I can admit it, at least I'm not denying it.  I killed my brother with my recklessness. It's my fault he's dead, and I'm going to have to live with that for the rest of my life.

It's my fault.

No one will be able to convince me otherwise.

Hah.  No one's even tried, because they all know it too.  The doctor's, the nurses, the whole friggin town of Roswell.  My parents.

God, my parents.  I can't even comprehend what they must be feeling.  Their only daughter killed their only son.

Murderer.

Drugs.  Booze.  Sex.

This is the true story of Liz Parker.

Hmm.  What an interesting start for a documentary.  Straight A student plummets from the influence of her brother and boyfriend.  Killing her brother and nearly her boyfriend.

I can see it on E! already.

Well, I guess I have to be a celebrity to be on E!.

Fine.  Unsolved Mysteries.

Yeah.  In fact, it's a mystery I survived.  I don't know how I managed that.

I don't even remember the accident.  When it happened, who called the ambulance.

Why it happened.

Why I lived and Jakob didn't.

It's just this big freaking mystery to me, and probably to everybody else too.


It's been a month since the accident, since the funeral, and I haven't set foot inside of school yet.  Mom was understanding at first, but even now she knows that a month is too long.  So, I'm going back to school tomorrow.

I dread the make up work.

Oh hell, I'm not going to do it anyway. It's not as if I have a future anymore, screwed that over four months ago.

I get my cast off in two weeks, and I was finally able to rid myself of that blasted neck brace.  I have a still fresh scar over my eyebrow, but all of that is nothing.  Nothing compared to the pain my heart is feeling.

And it hurts.

***

Hey guys thanks again for the fb. Part three is about done, and if we have time, you'll get it tomorrow. Thanks, we appreciate it!

MerJ
posted on 10-Aug-2002 6:03:02 PM by Dream Lover MerJ
Talena - haha, you are NOT stupid! hehe. Thanks so much for the feedback, we appreciate it. Max will be introduced in person in Part Three, which will be out tomorrow. Thanks again.




MerJ
posted on 12-Aug-2002 5:52:00 PM by Dream Lover MerJ
Author: MerJ and Rach (Mystical Light ML 4ever)

Summary: Liz's life has gone into a downward spiral and the only one who may be able to help her is Max.

Category: M/L - CC

Rating: Pg-13 to possible R

Disclaimer: The characters of Roswell do not belong to me. Jakob and Joel, however do. Lyrics to "Somewhere in Between" and "Quasimodo" belong to the band Lifehouse.

Spoilers: Possibly S1 and S2 - AU fic.

Author's Note: This fic is based on Liz's POV. Neither of us are very good at those fics, but we just really like them. Also, this fic is very personal for myself (Rach), even though at times it may seem I don't know what I'm talking about, because, I probably don't. I don't know how to go about the whole drug scene, so bear with me, kay?

Title: Somewhere in Between

***

Shama - Hehe! Glad you like it! Thanks for the feedback.

talena - lol, thank you so much, I'm glad you enjoy it! Rach says she's still working on her next part for LaF, but she'll get it to her beta as soon as she can. Thanks!

FreeFall - Yes, he did say that he knew what she was going through, but that wasn't exactly what he meant. He just wanted her to open up to him. Anyway, thank you so much for the feedback!

clueless - Thanks! We appreciate your feedback!

roswellluver - Thank you for the feedback!

***

Part Four

It's well after 3:30, and my mother should have been here by now to pick me up.  I glance at the road every time I hear a car coming or going, but much to my dismay, it's never her.

It's, like, 110 degrees outside today, and I can feel the sweat sliding down my leg.  I want nothing more than to wipe it off, but alas, my cast prevents me from doing so.

I pull our my army camo cellphone and dial the number again.

Still busy.

I can picture her now sitting in her office, phone tucked under her ear, as she ruffles papers about.  Too busy to pick up her daughter.

I grab my crutches that I had set beside me when I sat on the steps, and I pull myself to my feet.  Looks like I'm going to have to walk.

Grrreat.

Before I could even leave the parking lot, a black jeep pulls up in front of me, Max Evans behind the wheel.

"Liz, you need a ride?"

No, Max, I chose to sit out her in 110 degree weather for a half an hour, and then decide to walk 5 miles to my apartment.

I'm happy to see him. Can't you tell?

Without a word, I open the passenger side door and hop in.  I place my crutches in the back and buckle my seat belt.  I glance over at him, to see a shocked expression on his face.  I bet he was expecting me to snap at him before I got into the car.

Haha.

After he gets over his shock, he pulls out of the parking lot and on to the road.  We ride in silence.  My attention is completely focused on the scenery passing me by.  Trees are scattered about.  There is one every couple of miles, looking so out of place in the dry scenic area of New Mexico.

One particular tree catches my eye. It's trunk is smashed and chunks of it is missing. It's obvious there was a wreck there.

My heart constricts, and my breath catches.

Oh, God.

As we drive by it, I turn in my seat and continue to stare. It's so small!  How fast was I going?

My breathing quickens and I try to turn back around as nonchalant as I can, but I can already see Max looking at me with concern out of the corner of my eye.

"Keep your eyes on the road, Max,"  I say bitterly.  I don't want him looking at me.  Like, I'm this fragile doll. I'm not going to break you know.

I stare down at my leg.

Nevermind.

His eyes shift back to the road and I inwardly sigh.  I hate being under everyone's scrutiny  Their constant watch.  I got enough of that at the hospital, I don't need it from Max Evans.

He glances at me again and I'm getting irritated.

"Stop it,"  I spit out.

I hear him sigh heavily.   "What is your problem?"  he demands from me.

My problem should be obvious, Max.  I killed my brother. I'm a murderer.

Instead of replying I stare the window.  I don't need to explain myself to him.  Besides, he already knows what a terrible person I am.

We pull up to the Crashdown, and I think he expects me to sit here and talk to him.  A thank you at least.

Do I do it?

Heck no.

I hop out of his jeep and I walk through the diner.

Hey, look, everyone is staring at me again.

Ignoring their gazes, I head into the back room.  My mother's office is shut and a stream of light shines through the cracks.  I can hear her talking to someone on the phone.  Probably my father.  They've been talking a lot lately, no doubt about me.

I hope up the stairs to my apartment that sits conveniently over our diner.  I open the door and I'm immediately greeted by the only constant male in my life.

Jacks.  My little Jack Russell Terrier.

Jacks starts bouncing up and down wanting me to catch him, but I know if I let go of my crutches, I'll fall to the floor.

So, instead, I make kissing sounds at him and trudge down the hallway to my room.  I remember, many a times when Jakob and I would sit here, one of us at each end, and we'd play monkey in the middle with the dog.  We'd gain much amusement in watching Jacks run back and forth between us trying to catch the rubber ball.

I let the smile slowly stray from my lips as I sank into my bed.  My thoughts wandering to better times.  Before my parents' split, my brother's sudden decision of a "new" him.  Before my break down to peer pressure.  Before that blasted tree.

I fall back on to my bed and stare at my ceiling.  

What am I going to do?

***

I hadn't noticed that I'd fallen asleep until I woke up to the sound of my mother's bed room door closing.  Turning my head I notice the glaring red numbers on my alarm clock.  10:30.

She must have just closed the diner.

Groaning, I pull myself into a sitting position.  I'll never be able to get back to sleep.  

Jacks stirs next to me and sits up next to me,  already filled with excitement  He crawls into my lap, panting, and I wave my hand in front of my face, to ward off his dog breath.

For the longest time, I just sit there, in my darkened room, petting my little Jacks.  My thoughts drifting to anything and everything.

But one thought keeps coming back to the front of my mind.

I'm hungry.

"Hmm, pancakes,"  I never eat breakfast so I very rarely get to enjoy the wonderful breakfast meals.  Pancakes, bacon and eggs, biscuit's and gravy...Yum.

So, now, I am preparing to make pancakes, remembering the times when my dad would make them for Jakob and I.  We'd always fight about who got the best looking pancake, forcing my father to make another until it was perfect.  Sometimes, we'd go through a whole box of pancake mix.

Then, as we got older, we'd try to make our own pancakes.  Jakob would try to flip them into the air as I stand on the side lines watching with amusement.

And then, the pancakes stopped.

And, I know why.

Because we don't have the freaking perfect pancake maker!

I slip my third attempted pancake into Jacks' dish and I settle for an apple on the counter top.

An apple a day keep the doctor away, right?

***

After enjoying my apple, I didn't go straight to my room. Instead, I found myself hopping down two sets of stairs and into the basement.

Jakob's Lair.

I smile at the feeling I get when I step inside. It used to be I'd get on hell of a beating if I was ever caught down here, but then he started welcoming me with open arms. We'd stay down here hours at a time just talking and laughing.

It was a relationship that I've always wanted to have with my brother. A relationship I'll never see finished.

I crawl under his cool sheets that still, faintly, smell of him. My brother smelt good, people. He had the best cologne and he always put just the right amount on.

He smelled better than Joel.

Ugh. Those guys really smelt good.

Staring off into space, I vaguely notice my eyes start to drift shut.

And then I'm caught in a most unusual dream.


TBC?


Feedback please!


Sorry, guys, if this part was short and pretty much uneventful. Getting pretty busy over here, and we haven't had much time to formulate the next part. Bear with us, we'll get the next part out as soon as we can. Thanks!
posted on 13-Aug-2002 2:41:58 PM by Dream Lover MerJ
Author: MerJ and Rach (Mystical Light ML 4ever)

Summary: Liz's life has gone into a downward spiral and the only one who may be able to help her is Max.

Category: M/L - CC

Rating: Pg-13 to possible R

Disclaimer: The characters of Roswell do not belong to me. Jakob and Joel, however do. Lyrics to "Somewhere in Between" and "Quasimodo" belong to the band Lifehouse.

Spoilers: Possibly S1 and S2 - AU fic.

Author's Note: This fic is based on Liz's POV. Neither of us are very good at those fics, but we just really like them. Also, this fic is very personal for myself (Rach), even though at times it may seem I don't know what I'm talking about, because, I probably don't. I don't know how to go about the whole drug scene, so bear with me, kay?

Title: Somewhere in Between

***

Rapunzel - Hehe, it's no problem! Thanks for coming back!

Shama - Glad you like it! Thanks for the feedback!

FIREBLUEGURL13 - Thanks for the feedback!

JaneLane - Thanks for the feedback!

the better twin - I'm glad you asked that, I was wondering if anyone was going to catch that. Yes, she should be in jail, however, we haven't really figured out how we're going to go about that. See, it's either, Liz already when to a trial and has been let go to serve community service (b/c knowing you are the cause of your brother's death is enough), OR there hasn't been a trial yet...But either way, Liz won't go to jail. We don't really want that to happen, so if we go through with that part and have an actual part with a trial, then she'll have to do community service, but that's it. Haha, as you can tell, we don't know much about this stuff...So I hope I didn't confuse you further with my poor explaination. Thanks for the feedback!

roswellluver - Thanks so much for the feedback!

FreeFall - Hehe, thanks for the feedback, we appreciate it.

***

Part Five

It doesn't even seem like a dream.  I see nothing but black, it's all around me.

But I'm not afraid. It's not eerie or unnerving. It's just...There.

That's when I feel it.  The energy around me wavering.  The air ripples and I can practically see it.  Like when you poke your finger into a still pond.

It's happening all around me, and now, I don't feel alone.  I feel someone here, where ever here is, with me.  Watching me.

I turn around in circles trying to pinpoint the location of the "presence".

And that's when I see her.  I want to laugh out loud so badly, but I can't.  I just stare at her.

Isabel Evans stands in front of me, almost as shocked to see me as I am her.  I slowly start to walk towards for reasons, unknown to me.  As I get closer, her appearance becomes more vivid and clear to me. She's in red pajamas, her hair braided in pig tails.

There's fear and uncertainty in her eyes....

Her eyes.

I stop dead in my tracks.  I don't stop her as she turns and runs away.  I can't help but think about her eyes, because they weren't her eyes.

In my dream, Isabel Evans had my brother's eyes.

***

Through my whole morning routine, I kept trying to find some logical explanation for my dream.  But then, it's just a dream, and not all dreams are logical, right?

Still, the dream really freaked me out.

I haven't seen Isabel since, well, I haven't seen her in two months.  I think she was sick, but anyway, Isabel Evans does not have green eyes.  Hers are light brown with speckles of gold in them, just like her brother's.

Jakob's eyes were a shiny emerald green.  A shade so unique, not even colored contacts could justify the hues correctly.  So, why did I dream of Isabel with Jakob's eyes?

Why did I dream of Isabel, period?

I must be going through withdrawal.

As soon as I get out of this friggin cast, I got make nice with my friend Eddie.

***

Okay, first class of the day is my fifth block computer class with Miss Sedera.  Guess who I share that class with.

That's right.  Mr. Max Evans himself.

And he saved a seat for me!  How sweet!

Oh, look, Eddie saved a seat for me too.  Where to sit?  Where to sit?

I hate decisions.

Ah, well, just pick one.

Congratulations, Eddie, you're today's lucky winner!

I take a seat next to Eddie and he cowers away from me, almost like he's afraid I'll hit him.  Hmm.  Smart boy.

"Hey, Eddie,"  I say in my normal, everyday, tone.  I might as well get a head on start on making nice.  He has the best goods.

"Oh, um, hey, Liz,"  he says, his voice wavering.

"How you doing this fine morning?"

"Fine,"

"Good, good,"  I tell him and pat his shoulder.   "I think that's good,"

"Hey, Eddie," I hear somebody whisper from behind me.  I don't dare look.   "Do you wanna trade me seats?"

Before I can give him a threatening glare, Eddie had already happily agreed.

Max Evans now takes the seat next to me.

"Hey, Liz,"

Oh, how I hate him.

"Today we meet at the Crashdown, right?"

"Actually, Max, I already have plans,"  I lamely tell him.

His brows furrow.   "Really?  You didn't mention that before,"

I inwardly grown.  Think of something before he asks.

"What do you have planned?"

Umm.

"That's top secret,"  I tell him and he quirks an eyebrow at me.   "I work for the FBI.  Special Unit.  I can't tell you more than that,"

Something flashes in his eyes, but I turn away before I can even think twice about it.

Then he starts laughing. It's the most fake and strangled laugh I have ever heard. Turning around I see he has tear running down his cheeks from his "laughter." I bet their fake too.

"You're hilarious, Liz," he says and smacks my arm playfully.

Uh, yeah, Max, I'm a regular comedian.

***

Fifteen minutes left in the class and while everyone else is doing what their supposed to, I'm doing...

That's right, nothing.

While Miss Sedera was explaining what we were to do today, I was singing "Quasimodo" in my head. The song I always sing when I'm tuning people out.

There goes my pain
There goes my chains
Can't you see the falling

Oh! Look, WinPopup! That thing is so fun!

Because this feeling
That has no meaning

Hmm, who to mess with today?

Eddie!

There goes the world
Off of my shoulders

(Hey, Eddie)

Snicker. He looks so startled, I love this.

There goes the world
Off of my back

Cause I don't want it
I don't want it

You can't change me
You can't break me

There goes the -

(Murderer)

Huh?

I turn to glare at Eddie to see him staring thoughfully at the computer screen. It couldn't have been him, he doesn't know how to answer the stupid message. I glance around the room. Who sent that?

"Liz?"

I glance over at Max who's looking at me with concern. "What's wrong?"

As he leans over me to check out my screen, I minimize my message. "Nothing," I say harshly.

He stares at me a moment longer before he turns back to his own screen. I then restore my message.

(Who is this?)

Ha, Liz, like they're really going to answer that.

(Murderer)

I see. All right then.

I stand abruptly and glare around the room. All eyes are on me, but I don't care, I'm looking for a guilty face.

Or a smug one.

Tess Harding.

My eyes narrow even more, if that's possible, and I can feel the heat of my anger boiling in my veins. Stupid, bitch.

"Miss Parker, is there something wrong?" the teacher asks me.

I ignore her and continue to glare at my enemy. Tess Harding is the biggest bitch to ever walk the planet. She's a weasel.

Wicked Weasel of West Roswell High.

The lives off of other people's misery and I'll be damned if she gains satisfaction from mine.

Before I could so much as formulate an attack, the bell rings and Tess springs from the class.

"That's right, Tess," I mutter under my breath. "Run,"

***

When lunch rolled around, instead of going to the table under the tree, like I had planned, I stalk up to Max's table. Everyone was there, except for her.

"Where's Tess?" I ask too mad to gain satisfaction from their startled looks.

"Liz?" Max tries to stand but I stop him by lifting my hand.

"Where is she?" I ask again.

"Tess doesn't have this lunch anymore," Kyle finally answers. "Thank, God,"

I quirk an eyebrow at him and he answers my silent question.

"No, we're not dating anymore,"

I stare at the group in front of me a moment longer and then I turn to leave.

"Wait, Liz," Max stops me. "Have lunch with us,"

"No," was my simple reply, and then I'm off in search for Tess, at a very slow pace.

Damn crutches.

Max jogs after me, calling my name.

"Liz, I don't think this is such a good idea," he tells me.

"Well, I didn't ask you what you thought, now did I?" I tell him and tossed him a glare for good measure.

"Liz, listen to me, Tess isn't someone you should mess with,"

I snort with laughter. "That the blonde Weasel? Max, I'm not someone you should mess with, I think I can handle her," Even if I have to play baseball with her head.

"Liz, please, you're going to get yourself into more trouble than you want," he steps in front of me now. "Just come back to our table, okay?"

I guess, I won't be able to cause as much damage to her weasel-looking face while I'm still in my cast. So, I'll wait another week. Plan my sweet revenge.

Shrugging my shoulders, I turn back around. "Yeah, okay,"

I see Max relax with relief and I momentarily wonder why he cares, but then, it's Max Evans, Mr. Nice Guy.

As we approach the table again, I notice Isabel is missing. "Where's Isabel?" I ask before I could stop myself.

Everyone looks at me like I've grown a third head. Then, Michael speaks up. "She had to run," he says to me, and then looks at Max. "She wants us to meet her Maxwell,"

"After lunch," he said and sat down.

"Now,"

I look between the two of them and I am reminded of a show on the Discovery Channel. When two males are trying to win dominance. The alpha male or something like that. I bet it's Max.

"Later, Michael," Max said forcefully and everyone knew he meant it.

"So, Liz," Maria DeLuca says and pulls me down next to her. "How are you?"

"Fine," I say.

And then I'm bombarded with a million questions by her. What's my favorite color, my favorite band? What am I doing a week from now? A month. A year.

Have you ever felt
Like your only comfort was your cage
You're not alone

Oh, God. Can't. Tune. Out.

Questions. Too many.

Have you ever felt
Like your secrets give you away
You're not alone
I've been there too.

What have I gotten myself into?

***

After lunch, I decided to roam the hall instead of going to class. I figured I could get a head start on my revenge by doing something to Tess' locker.

I haven't decided what yet, but I'll think of something.

As I round the corner I see Michael and Isabel go into the eraser room.

Can you say, ew?

Max is next to enter.

Huh. So that's how they do it.

Curiosity always gets the best of me, so now I'm trudging down the hall to eaves drop. I press me ear against the door and listen.

Nothing.

Ah, c'mon, speak up.

I can now hear them whispering, but it's too muffled for me to make anything out.

Ugh, this is no fun.

Okay then.

I reach into my pocket and pull out my keys. I start shaking them wildly and twisting the door knob.

"Damn, kids," I say gruffly. Pounding on the door I resist the urge to laugh. "You hellions get out of there or I'm going to get Principal Mitchell,"

I hear Michael whisper something and I grin at my performance. It certainly doesn't deserve an Oscar, but it fooled them.

The door opens slowly and I plaster a grin on my face.

"Hey Mikey," I say sweetly. "What you doing in there?"

He glares at me. "Nothing,"

"Nothing?" I open the door wider to reveal Isabel and Max. "Ohh, so that's how you do it in your family,"

Max and Isabel look at each other with disgust. "I'm hurt, Max," I say with a fake pout. "I thought we had something between us,"

Michael rolls his eyes at me and steps in front of my view. "Excuse us, Liz, but we have stuff to discuss,"

I lift my hands in surrender. "Right, things to discuss," I nod my head at him. I love annoying him. "I'd be careful you guys, the rumor mill runs fast," I wink at them and then I'm off.

Sigh. I think I had enough fun for one day.



TBC.

Feedback please.

[ edited 1 time(s), last at 13-Aug-2002 4:57:23 PM ]