posted on 10-Aug-2002 7:29:25 PM by talena

Title: Adia
Author: talena
Disclaimers: Anything Roswellian belongs to Jason Katims. *sigh* Even my Zan. The idea for this story belongs to…LoL! The idea doesn’t even belong to me *big* and the song Adia belongs Sarah McLachlan.
Category: AU M/L; some CCs
Genre/Rating: Drama & Romance with a healthy dose of Angst / PG-13 up to a possible NC-17
Dedication: To Erin and Phoebe! Special dedications to Lillie for everything!
Summary: Response to a challenge issued by Lillie. I’m going to use her challenge as sort of a summary since I’m too lazy to come up with one of my own. LoL *wink*

The Challenge

After a brutal attack leaves Liz Parker Evans without her memory, her husband declares that she is another woman. She begins to find out just what that means when she begins to try to recover that lost memory.

The life that emerges is one of a bitter and depressed woman who has apparently alienated everyone, including her husband. He has already filed for divorce. This new woman that she has become though, convinces him to put his plans on hold.

As she rebuilds her life Liz and husband fall in love again. There is danger lurking however, and one last angry memory waiting to surface. Will their love survive?

Author’s Notes: This is a new approach for me, so bear with me ok?? I have the basic plot in my mind, but that’s all, so if things start getting a little choppy or just plain weird, then tell me ok?? Please tell me what you think and thanks for reading!

On with the story!

~*~

Adia I do believe I failed you
Adia I know I let you down
Don't you know I tried so hard to love you in my way
It's easy let it go...


~*~

Bittersweet

Night had fallen. The sun had long surrendered its warming light to the inky blackness of the evening sky, leaving the world to be bathed in darkness with only the soft glow of the crescent moon and the stars to shine a path for the weary souls who wondered the streets at night. In the distant a soft cooing sound was heard as the owl and other creatures of the night awakened from their slumber to begin their nightly routine of survival.

Across the city, lights faded from the windows of many homes as families wandered once again to the world of slumber and dreams while others left the comfort of their homes to dance the night away at some club. Others left to their jobs and still many made their way to the many bars littered around New York City.

Yes, night had fallen.

But then again why should it matter to her? Her world had long been cloaked in a darkness that would never leave her side. Whether it is daytime or nighttime, her skies forever remained a dark void with the occasional wisps of gray that signaled an impending storm.

Why should anything matter to her at this point? Why should anything matter at all?

That’s right. Nothing should matter anymore. Nothing did matter anymore. She didn’t matter. He didn’t matter. Life didn’t matter. Not since that day. Not since…

She shook her head fiercely as her mind worked to rid herself of the memories. They were after all, just memories. Images of a past she would rather forget if she could. A past she had tried to forget, if not for the constant reminders, perhaps, she would have forgotten already. It was an endless battle that she fought against herself and the rest of the world. An endless battle that would usually lead her here at the end of each meaningless day.

Here was her only haven from the outside world. Here was her study. The one place she knew her husband would not follow her to, could not follow her too. Behind the locked door and heavily draped windows, here was where she cut off any connection to the outside world completely. Here was where she found solitude. However, no locks or drapes in the world could keep away the memories. Nothing in the world could possibly keep away the emotions and flashes that haunted her on a daily basis.

Glancing over at the manila envelope that lay on her desk, a smile lifted the corners of her mouth. It would also seem that locks could not keep her husband from delivering that particular package either. So he had gone through with it after all. The thought was bitter as her gaze settled once again on the fire in front of her and drank from the glass she held in her unsteady hand. The bitter liquid traveled down her throat, burning a familiar path as she once again drowned herself in alcohol and it was only in these rare moments did she actually allow the memories to flow freely.

“Please tell me what’s wrong.”

She glanced at him briefly before her gaze once again returned to the fire and she drank slowly from her glass. He continued unfazed, she had been like this for the past months.

“Let me help you.”

His words seemed to ignite the something in her as a light sparked in her once dead eyes.

“Help me? You want to help me? After all this time, you finally want to help? Where were you when I needed you before? Where were you when-” By this time she had thrown the glass she was holding at him, and tears were streaming down her cheeks as sobs wracked her body. He had held her then, tightly against his own body as she wept. He said nothing, merely held her. After all, what was there to say? This is the most emotion she had shown such a long time.

Alas, it was not to last as he suddenly felt himself being forced away from her small form. His eyes snapped open when he felt himself suddenly hit the ground and found his wife standing over him, her eyes dead. “You can’t help me.”

She spun to run out of the room, but he grabbed her hand. “No! I love you! Please don’t shut me out!”

Her eyes connected with his, and for a moment flashed with emotion at his declaration of love. His heart sped up as hope began to fill him, but any hope that he had managed to grasp when her eyes dulled again, and he could almost see the wall she had suddenly built around her heart, keeping everything and everyone away from it. The wall that kept him away from her heart and her soul. He felt his own heart shatter at the stony look in his wife’s eyes. Eyes that were now filled with contempt and love at the same time, as she whispered her last true words to him, “I’m sorry.”

‘Too late!’ His mind screamed as he watched her walk away from him. Not once did she even look back at him, at the life and sanity she had chosen to leave behind. Not once.


She had walked away then, but in the end she had returned, never able to leave him. However, from that moment on, their love had gradually began to fade as did their marriage as the two continued to live with one another, a part of their shattered hearts holding onto that eternal promise of ‘till death do us part’.

She stood up on shaky legs, her unsure arm trying to steady herself on the armchair of her chair. Walking precariously and drunkenly towards her desk, she paused as she looked down at the picture from her wedding day and then looked over at the envelope on her desk.

It would seem that death would not be the reason that would part them after all. No, the thing that would tear them apart was a mere stack of papers sealed in an envelope just as their fate had been sealed on that fateful day.

A laugh bubbled up inside of her, half from madness and the other half from the bottle of vodka she had drank that night. The sound was coarse and unfamiliar even to her ears it reverberated around the room. Her head was thrown back with her mirth; her whole body shaking from the force of the bitter sounding laugh, the liquid in her glass splashed everywhere as she swayed on unsteady legs.

Just as soon as it had come, her laughter died on her lips as she collapsed in her desk chair, now scowling at the envelope and picture in front of her. Placing her glass down, a steadier hand picked up the envelope, one thought running through her mind. He really had gone through with it.

Three years ago, the very idea that he could really leave her so easily would have broken her, but now, three years had passed. Things were said, feelings were expressed, and actions were made between the two of them, and she found that this little thing could not break her. Not when she was already broken.

Looking down at the envelope again, she nodded to herself. He wanted freedom from their marriage, their love, from her. With each passing thought, she became angrier and angrier as her mind became irrational caused only by the alcohol she had been taking in that night. No! He wanted the freedom to fuck other women! He wanted freedom from having to look at her! Without conscious thought, Liz had thrown her glass to the other side of the room, a tortured scream of fury escaping her lips. The glass hit the wall and shattered into several pieces just as her life had three years ago.

Yanking her wedding ring off from the chain hanging around her neck, she threw it also. If he wanted his freedom then she would give it to him. She didn’t care about him anymore, and he certainly didn’t care for her. He probably only married her just so that he could get her into bed. The thought alone was irrational, but her mind wasn’t very rational as she threw the photo into the fire before she stumbled out of the room, eyes crazed as she left her home to seek comfort in more alcohol.

~*~

He waited until he heard the slamming of the front doors before entering the large study. Carefully stepping around the broken glass, he glanced around the room. He started to pick up the pieces of glass when something caught his eye, upon closer examination; he saw that it was a ring. Her wedding ring. Their promise of forever.

Walking further into the room, with the ring resting in his palm, he noted something withering in the flames, and when he looked closer, he saw that the photo of their wedding day, and his heart clenched as he watched the photo go up in flames. He watched until the only thing remaining were ashes just as he had stood by helplessly watching their marriage go up in flames.

So she had seen the divorce papers. He looked over at her desk and wondered if she had actually signed them. Crossing the length of the room, he reached the desk only to see that she hadn’t even opened the packet. It was then he heard the starting of an engine, and he pulled the heavy drapes aside to see her pulling out of the driveway.

Glancing down at the ring in his hand, he felt the tears trickle down his cheeks, his mind remembering their vows of forever as the world witnessed the bonding of two souls. Back then, their hope for a beautiful life together before and even after death was overwhelming. They believed nothing would separate them. Not even death itself.

Now, it would seem that Time wasn’t on their sides as it was now clear that their time together had finally run out as Max Evans watched his wife walk away from him once more. It was a bittersweet ending to a bittersweet love.

tbc…(???)

So how did I do? Lillie? Anyone?


[ edited 10time(s), last at 13-Feb-2003 5:57:12 PM ]
posted on 16-Aug-2002 8:38:03 PM by talena
Lillie !!! Thanks so much for the feedback! More thanks for being my beta! *hugs tightly* I'm glad you posted this challenge! I'm having fun writing it! PS. You're not an airhead! LoL!

carolina_moon That's not how I like my Max and Liz either! I promise to make it better soon! Thanks for commenting!

blake Envious of moi? I should be the one envious of you! In fact, I am! LoL! Thanks so much for the feedback and compliment *shy* You're making me blush!

A Rose Is True Blue Embarass I do get! You're welcome! Erin!!I like dedicating stories to you! Thanks for always leaving feedback!

senoritaspoiler Hiya sweetie! Thanks for leaving feedback! I hope to talk to you some more soon. I'm never on AIM anymore,*sad* I know, but I'll try to be on as much as possible.

Alexandra86 Thanks for leaving feedback! I'm glad you like it!

JaneLane Hehe! Thanks for reading!

Shama Thanks so much for the compliments! *blushes* I'm glad you love this story!

LixMix5 Thanks for reviewing! I hoped that the name would draw people in! I'm glad it did!

Pathos Thanks for commenting!

flohmac Really? It was perfect? Thanks!

limegreenli Aly!!! Thanks for reading and leaving feedback! Especially when I know you only read kid fics! Means a lot to me!

roswellluver Hiya sweetie! Thanks for reviewing!

CrashdownGurlie *blushes some more* Aww thanks Pheebs *hugs* Of course I would dedicate it to you! Thanks for always reading my stories!

Wench On A Leash Don't you just love irony? I do. I also love the song Adia, it seems to fit this fic. Thanks for reading!

senoritaspoiler *hugs* Thanks so much for the bump!

Lillie Lillie!!!! *runs and throws herself at Lillie, knocking them both to the ground* Sorry! LoL! Thanks so much for the present *big* *sighs* Zan....*goes off in her own little Zan-induced world*

maxs silverhandprint *still in Zan-induced world* He really is my weakness, huh? *lol* Thanks for reviewing!

Lana Lane Hi sweetie! I'm so glad you like it! Thanks for the bump and feedback!

ILYMEFOREVER Sorry sweetie, can't let the secret out yet. It will come much later!

CrashdownGurlie More coming soon! As promised! As soon as I finish writing this note!

Lillie Another bump? *smiles* Thank you!

honeybear Nope, things won't be good. Not for a while. I just love writing Max and Liz angst! So much fun!

Kitcat26 It's official! You guys are making me blush so much! I'm glad you like this! Thank you so much for you lovely comments!

Lillie You are the bumping queen! *starts singing the tune to Dancing Queen*

honeybear Thanks for the bump!!

Aww! You guys are just too sweet! *sniffs* Thanks so much for being so patient with me! School started and I have know time whatsoever to do anything else! I sat down and wrote this part yesterday, and stayed up kinda late finishing it. So the ending may be a little iffy...

edited again to say "What the hell??" Nothing showed up whenever I posted, hence the reason I edited so many times!! Story will be in the next post if I can get it to work!!

[ edited 15time(s), last at 16-Aug-2002 8:47:32 PM ]
posted on 16-Aug-2002 8:48:04 PM by talena

**Mild NC-17. Not really, I’ve never written NC-17 before, so I’ll wait until further into the story until I write the real nookie ^_^. Songs used in this chapter both belong to Savage Garden.**

~*~

Adia I'm empty since you left me
Trying to find a way to carry on
I search myself and everyone to see where we went wrong


~*~

Remembrance

Darkness claimed the silent streets as the misty forms of storm clouds collected in the night sky, shading the moonlight and stars, completely dousing the world in blackness. As he walked along the lonely path, the trees’ shadows danced hauntingly around him in the otherwise still night. The looming street lights his only guidance as he walked pensively, aimlessly through the throng of trees. It was a long trek, one he usually embarked on after a night like this. It was a time for his mind to settle, a time for his emotions to calm, and for him to remember. It was a time where he would allow himself to remember the warmth of light.

For like the world around him, he had already been claimed by the darkness three years ago. However, the only difference was that the world was relieved from the darkness when light once again fought back against the dark and showered the world with its warmth, touching each and every living being but him. Yes, he had been claimed by the darkness, and now as he allowed himself to remember the light, he wondered how he had allowed such a thing to happen.

Trekking still further, he reached one of the few secluded area of the park. He continued until his eyes rested on a certain tree by a small little pond, a bittersweet smile made its way to his lips as he gazed at the beautiful scene. Making his way over to the tree, Max nearly lost his stepping as he hurried towards the memories.

He smiled, as he looked down at his beautifully adorable girlfriend, her eyes covered by his large hands as they walked along totally in sync. She was pouting at him cutely, her attempt at divulging any information from him having just completely failed much to her dismay and his amusement and arousal. Glancing down, he noted absently the evidence of his arousal and result of her little trick, thanking God that she was walking in front of him. Not that anyone would see them anyway. It was nighttime after all.

“Max Evans! Tell me where we’re going this instant! You know I hate surprises!” Liz finally demanded, trying the commanding approach for the first time. Max smirked again and leaned in, whispering softly in her ear, “I’d tell you, but then I would have to ki-”

“Kill me?” She interrupted with a snort, but Max continued unfazed, kissing her temple before moving his lips lower to the nibble her ear, eliciting a soft moan from her as she wiggled in his arms, but still his lips went lower until they reached her neck and he sucked on the sweet skin softly causing her to gasp and moan even louder. Her reaction made him chuckle as his eyes darken in desire and he moved his lips higher again until they were right next to her ear, his warm breath sending tingles down her spine as he whispered huskily into her ear, “As I was saying, I’d tell you, but then I’d have to kiss you.”

With that said, he began to nibble on her ear again as his hands fell away from her eyes. She moaned softly, her eyes shut tight as the sensations rippled through her. Suddenly Liz turned around his arms, her now dark eyes looking up at him passionately as she demanded, “Then tell me.”

Max took his cue, and instead of saying anything, swooped down to capture her lips with his, arms tightening around her small frame as he brought her even closer to him. She responded willingly and he groaned softly when he felt her tongue swipe against his lips, and he parted them willingly as his tongue darted out to meet hers. Together they stood light that, wrapped in one another’s arms, tongues dancing and dueling as the moon immersed them in a soft silver glow.

Finally, Max pulled away, albeit unwillingly as he rested his forehead against hers, both of their breathing labored as they began to catch their breath. He smiled into her eyes as whispered, “I could live on your kisses alone, but we have a little appointment to make.”

And once again his hands covered her eyes, but this time she went quietly, still dazed from their kisses. The stars twinkled merrily above them as they made their way to wherever it was they were going. After a while, Max slowed to a stop, pulling Liz against him as Liz breathed in the air around them as Max removed his hands, “We’re here.”

Liz looked around, confused. “Here is a park?”

Max shushed her and held out his hand to her which she took without a thought as she allowed him to lead her further into the throng of trees, and the sight that greeted her, left her gasping as tears welled up in her eyes. Max stood back, watching her reaction as she took in the scene before them.

The moonlight settled over the waters of the small pond, mingling with the mist that had gathered just above the water, creating a beautiful and ethereal sight. Not far away, a blanket lay beneath a weeping willow, hidden by the long leaves, which swayed gently in the wind. Around the blanket, candles were positioned cautiously; adding their own twinkle to that of the stars and moon and laying on next to the blanket was a bucket of ice with a cooling bottle of wine. As she crept closer, she saw the picnic basket and the rose petals that littered the ground.

Looking back over at Max, her eyes wide and tearful as the expression of shock grew. He smiled at her, the look on her face saying that all of his hard work had been worth it. Walking closer he wrapped his arms around her kissing her neck gently as he whispered softly in her ear, “Surprise my love.”

Liz silently started to cry tears of happiness as she turned around and wrapped her arm tightly around him. She couldn’t believe he had done this for her, but she had expected nothing less from him. She just couldn’t believe he had remembered.

This had been a dream of hers, something she had never experienced and had wanted to. A picnic under the stars. She could think of nothing more romantic than that, and he had made the fantasy come true as had made all of her other dreams come true. He was her savior, her love, and her soulmate.

Max released her for a few moments, and walked towards something hidden on the other side of the tree, and not more than few seconds later, music softly filled the air around them

I'll be your dream,
I'll be your wish I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope,
I'll be your love be everything that you need.


Then he was in front of her once more, his hand held out in an invitation, and together they danced slowly underneath the moonlight as they lost themselves in one another and the music.

I love you more with every breath truly madly deeply do..
I will be strong I will be faithful
'cause I'm counting on


Max smiled lovingly down at Liz who still had tears in her eyes, and he brushed them away gently, not taking his hand of her cheek as he cupped her smooth face. She smiled in return, eyes closing as her hand moved up to cover his.

A new beginning.
A reason for living.
A deeper meaning.


They danced long after the song was over, lost in one another’s eyes. He kissed her gently then, and she sighed happily as she kissed him back with every ounce of her being.

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
til the sky falls down on me...


Pulling away finally she whispered, “Thank you for making another dream come true.”

To which he replied softly with his own words, “Thank you allowing me to love you.”

And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy for all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of..
The highest power. In lonely hours. The tears devour you..


Then he did something that she would forever remember when he bent down on one knee, his hands clutching hers as he looked up at her. For a moment he was frozen as he stared into her eyes. She was so breathtakingly beautiful in her flowing white summer dress, the moonlight creating a halo about her. An angel sent from above. His angel. Finally he began to speak, any words of his rehearsed speech long forgotten by the sight of her, and all the words that tumbled from his mouth came from his heart and soul.

“From the moment I laid eyes on you, I was lost. Even at the age of nine, you took my breath away. When I stepped off that bus that day, yours was the only face with a welcoming smile and I remembered the butterflies in my stomach. With that smile you had welcomed me to be a part of your life. I remembered smiling back at you, feeling warmth and for the first time something in me stirred. I was safe yet lost at the same time. As it was, this feeling only grew stronger as we became closer, and as we grew, the feeling brought along with it longing. The day you agreed to let me love you in my way was the day the longing disappeared, but I still felt lost. It was not until you whispered ‘I love you’ did I understand why I felt this way. I felt lost because I truly was. Throughout my childhood, my parents had moved around continually, and I never had a real home. I never did until I met you. After years of searching, I finally found my home Liz. It was in you. No matter where I go, no matter what I do, and no matter how far I stray, I’ll always return to you because you are the only person I could never fully leave. You’re my heart and soul Liz. You’re it. My dreamgirl. My home.”

Max took a deep breath and looked into Liz’s eyes, tears were once cascading down her cheeks. He opened the small jewel box in his hand, revealing a beautiful diamond ring as he continued, “I can’t promise you that I will never hurt you, and I can’t promise you a life of ease, but…can promise you lifetimes. I’ll love you until the day I die and beyond. Elizabeth Parker, will you make my last dream come true and say that you’ll be mine forever?”

Liz dropped to her knees in front of him and threw her arms around him, crying softly into his ears, her voice strong, steady, and unwavering, “Yes! I’ll be yours forever! But only if you promise to be mine always.”

He wrapped his arms around her, whispering softly before losing himself in her, “Always.”

I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me...


Their kisses were slow, gentle, yet passionate and full of promises of more. Max pulled away from Liz, his dark eyes raking over her lithe form; taking in her ravaged and flushed appearance. Her hair and clothes were disheveled and her rosy lips swollen from kisses. Without a word, he swept her up into his arms, and carried her over to the awaiting blanket and laying her down gently. Once again he stared at her as she lay invitingly in before him.

Chocolate waves of hair flowing around her in a halo, the straps of her dress fallen against her shoulders, lips inviting, and her dark beautiful eyes staring at him. Everything about her was beautiful and willing him to partake in her sweetness. She was his. A flash of prideful possessiveness crashed through him. She had promised him to be his forever, and now he would officially make her his.

Unable to stay away too long, he covered her body with his and once again they found themselves in a passionate embrace as their lips found their way to one another.

Oh can't you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes
'cause it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come...


Clothes soon became an unnecessary barrier as they slowly threw away the offending garments. Moans and groans filled the air as they explored one another, and together they learned how to please the other as kisses were exchanged and hands explored.

Later, the sweet torment became too much. Max wanted to feel her warmth around him, wanted to be inside of her, needed to be one with her. He positioned himself at her entrance and looked down into her flushed face, his eyes seeking approval.

“Make Love to me Max.” She moaned and he answered by kissing her softly as he pushed his way into her.

I'll be your dream
I'll be your wish I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope
I'll be your love be everything that you need.
I'll love you more with every breath truly madly deeply do...


It was done. They were one, and there would never be anyone else. Together they floated higher and higher as pleasure like no other flooded their bodies. Their lovemaking was gentle and slow.

Max grunted and his thrusts became harder, faster, and deeper when he felt it coming. Liz cried out in pleasure she felt him pound into her, her nails digging into his skin as she too felt the end coming near.

I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.


Then it hit them. That last blissful release.

Liz felt it first as she crashed into oblivion, stars blinding her eyes as blissful pleasure like none other flooded her body, her body convulsed against Max as he too reached his peak, and both let out a scream as they lost themselves in ecstasy.

I want to lay like this forever,

Later, Max lay awake as Liz slept soundly in his arms while he stroked her silky strands. She had long fallen asleep and he had taken over his vigil of watching her as she slept, his own mind and heart never feeling more at peace then it did at that moment. The last thought that crossed his mind before he too fell asleep was how he wanted only to stay like this forever.

Until the sky falls down on me...
-Truly, Madly, Deeply


~*~

Her soft cries and moans filled the silence of the air around him, but only he could hear them. Only he could see the two bodies writing beneath the stars, sheltered by the arms of the weeping willow’s branches. Only he could remember the love these two soulmates shared. Only he and one other, and it would seem that the other had chosen to forget.

Hey, if we can't find a way out of these problems
Then maybe we don't need this
Standing face to face
Enemies at war we build defenses
And secret hiding places


Max looked away from the tree, the memories of the warmth and light lingering in his mind, and just looking at the tree was too much. It was all too much, this night, this place, and this entire situation. However, his mind couldn’t forget the significance of this night. For it was this very night he had given himself fully to one other.

Liz…

His mind closed in anguish as he remembered their promise of forever. It had been made this very night all those years ago, and though a decade had passed, the memory was burned into his mind, and he could still hear every sigh, every moan, and remember the feel of her lips with every kiss even now. Most of all, he could still remember the warmth of her embrace as she held him. He remembered the way it felt to have her love and warmth surrounding him, cocooning in a peace he had never felt before. The warmth of home.

I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's all right
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man


He was a fool though, to believe that it would last. Back then, he had been so full of hope, so full of love and in return, he had been blinded to reality. He should have known. Their love was too unreal, too magical, and too perfect. He should have known it was nothing more than a dream.

Hope.

It seemed such a long forgotten emotion. He had lost the will to hope three years prior when his life suddenly took a turn for the worst and spiraled downhill from there. It was in these moments he was vulnerable. It was only in the moments he allowed his barrier to fall and for him to remember did he also yearn and hope. It was in these moments when his guard had fallen and he was subjected to the pain his love dealt to him. Her harsh words his downfall when all he really wanted, all he really needed was her to hold him.

Hey, more than angry words I hate this silence
It's getting so loud
Well I want to scream
But bitterness has silenced these emotions


The wind had begun to pick up, grower harsher as a warning against the impending storm. It blew harshly against him as the skies darkened further, in the distance, a soft rumbling sound could be heard, signaling thunder. He paid no heed to the brewing storm, too lost in the storm inside of him to notice anything else.

Looking over to the tree once more, his eyes widened when he noticed something. Walking even closer this time, he stopped right in front of the tree trunk, his hand automatically reaching out to touch the emblem. He had carved it the morning after his proposal. His finger gently traced the large heart, eying the precious lettering.

M.E. + L.P. Forever.

Those simple words held such a profound meeting, just as their love had, and now the lettering was already fading, and as the pattern went, so had their love. It had been gradual, and before he even knew that their love had suffered, it was too late. Their constant fights about her alcohol problems and his sister. The constant clashes and angry words thrown carelessly out as they tried to hurt one another, but as did everything else in their relationship, even the anger soon faded to bitterness and a deep feeling of nothingness.

The anger had been more on her part, and the bitterness on his. It would seem that lately, all she had done was hurt him every chance she got. He had hoped and continued to love her. That was, until one night. A night he would rather not relive, for it was on that night not so long ago when he had realized that their love was truly over, and that he was holding on to nothing but memories and a love who had long ago vanished inside the bitter woman he called his wife.

It's getting hard to breathe
So tell me isn't happiness
Worth more than a gold and diamond ring?
I'm willing to do anything
To calm the storm in my heart


“Liz.” His calm voice echoed through the study as he took in the sight before him. His wife was once again sitting before the fire, her hand wrapped tightly around the neck of a bottle of wine, while the other one was holding onto a glass.

“What do you want Evans?” Her tone and the way she regarded him would have made him flinch years ago, but in the past few years, he had built a wall around his heart. Something she had taught him how to do.

“We need to talk.” He replied as he walked over to her desk, picking up the picture on her desk. His eyes closed upon seeing the smiling face of the two newlyweds, and a lone tear escaped as it trailed lightly down her cheek.

I've never been the praying kind
But lately I've been down upon my knees
Not looking for a miracle
Just a reason to believe


Looking back now, he often wondered how it had gotten to this point. How had he came to resent his beloved so? How could he have just sat back and watch their marriage die before his very eyes?

Yet, he knew the answers to all these questions. He resented not his wife, but the woman she had become. As for their marriage? He couldn’t do it on his own. He couldn’t hold their marriage together alone, and he certainly couldn’t make her love him. It was impossible. They could never go back to the way things were. Never.

After all the words that were said and done, after all the things she had done, the things he had done, and their now failing love, nothing could ever be the same.

I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's all right
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man


“So talk.” She muttered.

“Will you listen?”

Silence.

“Liz…years ago, I could not even comprehend what I am about to do. I wouldn’t even be able to see it in my worst nightmare.”

Liz never looked at him, her sigh indicating disinterest as she continued to down another glass of wine. He continued, hoping his words would strike her, get through to her, and bring her back to him. It was sad really, after all the things she had done to hurt him, he would take her back if only she would hold him and whisper her love.

“This is extremely hard for me to say. I didn’t want this for us Liz. I never wanted any of this. Please, tell me what’s wrong? Please let me in. Don’t shut me out again.” He was in front of her now, but her eyes seem to see through him as they continued to look forward, no emotions or indications of hearing him. It was one last plea. A desperate plea. She said nothing in return.

Do you remember not long ago?
When we used to live for the night-time
Cherish each moment
Now we don't live we exist
We just run through our lives
So alone
That's why you've got to hold me


“Liz, I…”

“Cut the chit chat Max and tell me what the fuck you want!” She finally yelled exasperated. Max flinched back and started to pace in front of the fire.

“Fine you know what I want? I want my wife back. I want that beautiful and intelligent woman I fell in love with back!”

Liz gazed at him, and for a second he thought he saw pain and regret in her eyes, but quickly it faded as she looked away, answering with a dead tone. “She’s dead Max. She’s never coming back. Stop wishing that she will. Stop hoping. The woman you loved is dead. Stop trying to find her.”

Max let out his breath as he remembered their promise of forever. It had worked out after all, he was long dead inside as was she. Perhaps their lost souls had found each other after the death of their hearts. Perhaps they were happy in another place, another time. He closed his eyes, willing all his strength to aide him as he whispered, “I want a divorce.”

Hey, if we can't find a way out of these problems
Then maybe we don't need this
Standing face to face
Enemies at war we build defences
And secret hiding places


Too deep in the storm raging violently inside of him, and the emotions running rampart in his heart, Max never noticed the change in the weather as the rain began to beat down on the earth as if punishing it. It would also seemed that Mother Nature was weeping for the breathtaking love that was long gone. It was nothing more than a memory after all. It was all he had left of her. Memories, and he would hold them until his dying day. Until he could be reunited with his love once more.

He pushed away from the tree and stared at it for a few moments before saying clearly, loudly, the word echoing louder than the wailing of the wind, “Goodbye.”

He knew not what he was whispering farewell to. Was it his heart? His love? His Liz? Or just the feeling of being alive? Perhaps it was all of the above and more. With this last farewell, Max walked away from the tree, walked away from all it stood for, and not once did he look back.

I might need you to hold me tonight
I might need you to say it's all right
I might need you to make the first stand
Because tonight I'm finding it hard to be your man
-Hold Me


The ringing of his phone interrupted his haze, and he absently answered it.

“Evans.”

“Max?” The urgent tone in his sister’s voice immediately brought him to attention, “Max, the hospital just called. It’s Liz. She’s-”

But he had already hung up. He was already running through the rain, through the park, and to his car. He was already on his way to Liz.

tbc...

Author's Note: So how did I do? Was the ending too rushed? Was it sad enough?? *smiles* bye for now!



[ edited 1 time(s), last at 16-Aug-2002 8:51:03 PM ]
posted on 12-Sep-2002 4:55:36 PM by talena
Author's Note:

Would you believe I wrote like crazy yesterday for two stories while at the same time, trying to beat my writer's block?? I was so close to finishing, but the board wouldn't let me update! It was down. *sad* I seriously wanted to participate in 9/11 dedication. Well, I'm on a different computer now, but I'll get the new part out ASAP. Thanks for your patience and bumps, I'll extend this author's note later. Love you all!

-talena
posted on 13-Sep-2002 6:44:58 PM by talena
Hey everyone,

I just couldn't leave without giving you guys something.....and no, I'm not going anywhere, just to the movies tonight. I rewrote this part, and decided to add more to this chapter to make it extra long.

Special thanks to Lana and Amy for your bumps!!!

And senoritaspoiler, this is for you hun! *wink*


He watched as she walked through the high arch of the door, her head drawn to the floor, stumbling just a little as she made her way towards him. He had been watching her for the past three years, and every time she passed through those doors, he could not help but think that she did not belong in such a place.

The musky atmosphere of the dimly lit room, the cloud of tobacco smoke floating around in the air, and the lewd comments from drunkards were the only thing to greet her, and yet she still came, almost every night, seemingly running away from the world outside the little bar as the door shut tight, leaving reality to be shut out as she and many others lost themselves in the alcohol.

He could not help but compare her to a fallen angel. She was beautiful in every way, and she did not belong in such a place, yet her presence there seemed just so right. Her eyes were cold, and she said nothing to anyone else. He knew nothing about her except that she would enter this place to escape the harshness of whatever reality she was living in. From one hell to another. An angel who was led astray and had lost her glorious wings. Yes, she was an angel among the devils of the bar.

She stopped at the counter, and resumed her usual seat, and ordering her usual vodka and rum. He had always felt reluctant to bring her the drinks, which was unusual in itself, since it was his job to do so. As owner of his bar, he was not supposed to care for his customers, just merely supply the alcohol to make them forget their problems. Walking over to her, he stopped just a moment to watch her play absently with something hanging from her neck, a lost and pained look on her face.

He set the drink down in front of her, startling her from her musings as she looked up at him. Considered an emotionless man himself, he almost felt himself cry out in pain at the look in her eyes. Pain, confusion, and rage swirled around in her dark depths. However she seemed not to notice this as she nodded curtly at him, taking the drink into her hand and downing it quickly. As he left to get her some more, something caught his eyes, and from the corner of his eye, he saw a beautiful diamond ring sparkling from a chain, hidden only by her dark curtain of hair.

And for the first time since he had been given the bar by his father all those years ago, he felt a sense of sympathy and concern for the dark-haired angel, and for once in his life he wondered about another. He wondered just how that look had been put in her eye. Wondering when she had trapped herself in her hell, the bartender could only shake his head sadly as he set another drink down in front of her.

~*~

She barely noticed the bar tender walk away, her mind still in a haze of rage as she thought about her husband’s declaration.

He wanted a divorce.

Those four words had struck her to the core, bringing so many emotions to the surface. Many emotions that she had thought long buried with the remains of her heart. Rage welled up inside of her, spreading through her body like a plague, and one by one, her other emotions were pushed away, leaving only rage and one other emotion refused to leave her. This emotion only became stronger when she thought of the significance of this particular day, and she frowned at herself for even remembering such a day.

Damn you Max Evans. Damn you.



the end....for now *wink*
posted on 23-Sep-2002 7:36:40 PM by talena
Author's Note:

Gomen nasai! (<~ Japanese for I'm sorry!)

Um...I've been having some techinical difficulties. Someone managed to hack into my email accounts and onto my AIM this weekend. Whoever it was, deleted all I had written for this part of Adia, and now I must write it again once more. I probably won't have time to do it because I've been trying to deal with really bad personal problems. I promise to update ASAP. I'm so sorry for this. Whoever did the hacking emailed bad things everywhere, and I'm trying to figure this all out, and add school...well I'm basically dying here.

I love you guys though! Thanks for the support!

-talena *tongue*
posted on 3-Oct-2002 8:08:10 PM by talena
Author's Note:

To My Readers and Fellow Roswellians,

I already posted a note about how RL is treating me, and well, it's not getting any better. I'm afraid I have to leave Fanatics for a little while. I'll come back once everything is sorted out. I don't know how long that will take. The thing is, while I'm away. I won't be writing or updating any fics. I'll make images here and there, so no worries about banners for those of you whom I've promised to make some for. I won't be reading or writing any Roswell fics. It's just that with all that's been going on, I've come to lose some interest in Roswell. Not good. Not good at all. *sad* So I guess this is goodbye, eh? I didn't think it would come so soon. (LOL, this is like some weird breakup) I'll come back as soon as possible. Promise. I will be checking the board once in a while for mod duties, so if you have anything to say or want to send me bmails, then go ahead. I'll reply. And if you have AOL IM, go ahead and message me some time. I'd love to chat with you wonderful people.

All My Love,
talena *happy*
posted on 8-Dec-2002 5:58:00 PM by talena
Author's Notes

Hey Everyone,

Wow, I'm surprised to see you guys stick with me this long. Thanks so much, you don't know how much that means to me. Unfortunately RL has not gotten any better, in fact it had gotten so bad that I found myself unable to write, leading to writer's block. I'm currently trying to beat this writer's block, and hopefully start posting soon. This next chapter to Adia is completely through for the most part. I still have to write about a two to three pages, which is really hard considering this block. I realize my writings are not going to be up to par with my usual works, trust me, my new story, Reflection, proves this much, but I'm trying to get back into the game. I won't be updating a lot since RL still hasn't really gotten any better, but I will be posting whenever I can. Thanks again for your support and I hope to see you soon.

-talena*tongue*
posted on 26-Dec-2002 12:08:20 AM by talena

A/N: Heya everyone! I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season. Merry Christmas! Although I only have about 30 minutes of it left. I just wanted to announce I'm back with a new part (which I hope is ok). Lillie, I know you didn't get to beta this one, so if you see any mistakes please just tell me ok? I also wanted to thank everyone who's been so supportive of me during this time. Although I am writing, RL really isn't getting any better and that shows up in my writing at times, so please bear with me. Some people I can think of off the top of my mind to thank...Lillie, Lana Lane, Amykins, Pheebs,Aly, and Erin, your support really helped me. Thanks so much. I would also like to Ely for betaing! Love you all lots!


~*~


'Cause there's no one left to finger
there's no one here to blame
there's no one left to talk to honey
and there ain't no one to buy our innocence



~*~


Silence


He watched as she walked through the high arch of the door, her head drawn to the floor, stumbling just a little as she made her way towards him. He had been watching her for the past three years, and every time she passed through those doors, he could not help but think that she did not belong in such a place.


The musky atmosphere of the dimly lit room, the cloud of tobacco smoke floating around in the air, and the lewd comments from drunkards were the only thing to greet her, and yet she still came, almost every night, seemingly running away from the world outside the little bar as the door shut tight, leaving reality to be shut out as she and many others lost themselves in the alcohol.


He could not help but compare her to a fallen angel. She was beautiful in every way, and she did not belong in such a place, yet her presence there seemed just so right. Her eyes were cold, and she said nothing to anyone else. He knew nothing about her except that she would enter this place to escape the harshness of whatever reality she was living in. From one hell to another. An angel who was led astray and had lost her glorious wings. Yes, she was an angel among the devils of the bar.


She stopped at the counter, and resumed her usual seat, and ordering her usual vodka and rum. He had always felt reluctant to bring her the drinks, which was unusual in itself, since it was his job to do so. As owner of his bar, he was not supposed to care for his customers, just merely supply the alcohol to make them forget their problems. Walking over to her, he stopped just a moment to watch her play absently with something hanging from her neck, a lost and pained look on her face.


He set the drink down in front of her, startling her from her musings as she looked up at him. Considered an emotionless man himself, he almost felt himself cry out in pain at the look in her eyes. Pain, confusion, and rage swirled around in her dark depths. However she seemed not to notice this as she nodded curtly at him, taking the drink into her hand and downing it quickly. As he left to get her some more, something caught his eyes, and from the corner of his eye, he saw a beautiful diamond ring sparkling from a chain, hidden only by her dark curtain of hair.


And for the first time since he had been given the bar by his father all those years ago, he felt a sense of sympathy and concern for the dark-haired angel, and for once in his life he wondered about another. He wondered just how that look had been put in her eye. Wondering when she had trapped herself in her hell, the bartender could only shake his head sadly as he set another drink down in front of her.


~*~


She barely noticed the bar tender walk away, her mind still in a haze of rage as she thought about her husband’s declaration.


He wanted a divorce.


Those four words had struck her to the core, bringing so many emotions to the surface. Many emotions that she had thought long buried with the remains of her heart. Rage welled up inside of her, spreading through her body like a plague, and one by one, her other emotions were pushed away, leaving only rage and one other emotion refused to leave her. This emotion only became stronger when she thought of the significance of this particular day, and she frowned at herself for even remembering such a day.


Damn you Max Evans. Damn you.


~*~
Earlier that Day…


Newly fallen leaves danced in the passing breeze, seemingly forming a barrier around her as she walked briskly beneath the mid afternoon sunlight. All around her summer was fading into autumn as the vivid greens transformed to tranquil browns, and just as the season went, the warmth surrendered to the cool breezes that sent chills dancing up her spine. As she moved along, she noted the many others who had come to greet this new autumn day and to bid farewell to those carefree days of summer as everyone once again settled into their lives.


Cool breeze and autumn leaves
Slow motion daylight
A lone pair of watchful eyes
Oversee the living



Her eyes took in the couples walking hand in hand, the couples kissing beneath the rain of leaves, and the couples sitting on benches, watching their children play. She took it all in with envy and loss as she passed by each scene, her mind only bringing up memories of what was lost to her forever. Memories danced across her mind as she the tight walls that surrounded her heart crumbled beneath the emotions that each memory brought forth.


Giggles filled the air as the young couple ran through the storm of leaves as the autumn breezes blew across the land. Their contagious laughter drew the envious gazes of those around them, but it was the aura they emitted that kept their eyes glued to the scene in front of them. The young woman ran quickly away from her pursuer and quickly dodged behind a large oak tree, clearly hoping to evade her companion. It would seem that she had succeeded for the man looked around for a moment before he shrugged and also disappeared into the trees.


They waited to see what would happen next as the female suddenly peered from behind the tree, searching earnestly for her boyfriend. When she saw that he wasn't there, a frown appeared on her face as she walked out to the front of the tree and looked around. The onlookers looked away, as the scene seemed to have ended, but were once again drawn to the scene at the sudden shriek. Looking back over they were surprised to see the brunette in the arms of her love, both sitting on the low branch of the tree. As it appeared, her boyfriend had merely been hiding in the same tree she had been hiding behind.


Right now the petite brunette was smacking her boyfriend as she huffed and moved a little ways from him as she scooted over on the branch. He, however pouted and moved after her, and wrapped his arms around her protesting form.


He whispered gently in her ear, causing a soft smile to appear on her face as she suddenly turned around and kissed him. It was at this moment, the onlookers suddenly felt like eavesdroppers as they looked away from the scene, feeling as if they were intruding on a precious moment by even just being in the same vicinity as the lovers. As the onlookers went on with their daily routine, all of them silently agreed on one thing. Those two were soul mates, true loves, destiny, and everything one can think of that pertained to romance. They were the epitome of Love.


Back then they had not thought of the scene they were making. No they hadn't been thinking at all. They were too busy losing themselves in a day where disapproval, family, and college could not keep them a part. This was a day for just them and nothing else because when it all came down to it; nothing else mattered if they had each other. In other words, it was a day of naïve dreams and hopes on her part. Closing her eyes, she could still hear the words he had whispered to appease her anger.


"Max Evans! You scared the hell out of me!" She shrieked as she moved away from him. She truly wasn't angry, but it couldn't hurt to let him think she was. It may prove to be fun.


He laughed, thinking she was only kidding as he scooted close to her and wrapped his arms around her, but frowned when she stiffened. She really was mad. He pouted a bit before a smile appeared on his face, bending over he whispered, "Aw love, don't be angry with me. I'm just trying to prove the song true."


"Song?" She whispered a smile fighting to appear on her face, but she managed follow through as she kept her lips tightly lined. He smiled because he knew he was winning, "Yes song, you know the one that goes Max and Lizzie sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G?"


He kissed her neck softly, eliciting a moan from her and he continued reciting the lines, "First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Max with the baby carriage..."


"That is so elementary Max." She whispered the smile on her face no longer hidden as she turned to him. He smirked at her, "Well we're halfway there already, we're kissing in a tree and we're in love."


She smiled at him sweetly, "But we've never kissed in a tree Mr. Evans."


He grinned and grabbed her to him, taking her by surprise as he lowered his head, and she gasped, anticipating the kiss as he whispered against her lips, "Well that's about to change isn't it Ms. Parker?"


Feel the presence all around
A tortured soul
A wound unhealing



A shriek interrupted her musings as she watched a pair of teenagers chase one another, just as she and her husband had once done almost a decade ago. As she watched the couple, she felt something inside of her stir to life, something that had lain dormant inside of her for so long.


It was in that moment she felt her soul come alive, only to die in the next moment as her heart surprised her, and broke once more. She had thought the pieces were too small to fit back together, and to have them be broken once more was too much to bear as she suddenly started gasping, the wounds that had gathered over the years scarring her heart and soul as she nearly wept from the pain of it all. But she didn’t. She wouldn’t have wept anyway if not for the fact that she had forgotten how to, but for the life of her, she could not make herself…correction; she could not let herself weep. What good would weeping do anyway?


The past was still the past and nothing could change it. Nothing. It was something she had realized long ago, and with the realization came the loss of her tears above everything else. Of course, one could not just lose the ability of shedding tears, no, first one must lose the ability to feel.


And to lose the ability to feel…she had to do the one thing she never thought she would ever have to do. She pushed those around her away and shut out the only one whom she could ever love. It was not as hard as she had thought it would be…to push them away that is… to keep distance between herself and the people she loved.


No, it wasn’t difficult at all. After all they were the ones who made her remember, and without the memories, she wouldn’t have to feel. So it was without regrets did Liz Parker Evans allow herself to be immersed in the abyss that would now be her haven as she began to hurt those around her, her own pain disappearing as she lost herself more and more.


Time now to spread your wings
To take to flight
The life endeavor
Aim for the burning sun



Letting go of a soft sigh, Liz pulled herself together, once more retreating behind her walls as she continued her trek to wherever she was heading. Even she didn’t know herself. She had been driving to her bar to begin a new night of drinking earlier than usual.


Alcohol, something she had once abhorred, but now could not live without as she found herself closer and closer to the edge. It was just another way to lose her and block out reality. To block out the voices, but when there was silence, they always came back, and now the voices filled her mind as she headed towards a destination unknown.


You're trapped inside
But you can still be free
If time will set you free
But it's a long long way to go



“Please tell me what’s wrong.”


“Max Evans! Tell me where we’re going this instant! You know I hate surprises!”


“Let me help you.”


“Thank you for making another dream come true.”


“You can’t help me.”


“Thank you for allowing me to love you.”


“You’re my heart and soul Liz. You’re it. My dream girl. My home.”


“No! I love you! Please don’t shut me out!”



The voices grew louder and harsher as they swirled around in the air.


My home.


Don’t shut me out.


My home.


Don’t shut me out.



It was then she started to run; it was then she tried to escape as her legs carried her faster and faster to what may be her end. However, she could not escape the voices, no matter how fast she ran, she couldn’t escape the past. It was something she should have realized long ago. Something she had not wanted to realize long ago. Yes one can forget the past, but never escape it. Just as you can’t change it, you can never escape it.


My home.


Don’t shut me out.


My home.


Don’t shut me out.


I love you.


My dreamgirl.


My home.


Keep moving way up high
You see the light
It shines forever



Don’t shut me out.



With a helpless cry, Liz collapsed as she resumed a fetal position, her hands clutching her head in a weak attempt at blocking out the voices. She shook from the effort of it all as she rocked back and forth, tears wanting to appear in her eyes as she tried to shut out his accusing voice, but it rose to a loud crescendo, breaking her as she cried out in frustration and anger as her mind cursed his name.


Without conscious thought, her hand grasped at the ground, and she began throwing things in every direction, trying to hit her demons, trying to block the face that belonged to the voice haunting her mind, but his face would not be blocked and his voice seemed to grow in the wind until it reached a deafening crescendo as it whispered the words he had uttered on their wedding day.


Sail through the crimson skies
The purest light
The light that sets you free
If time will set you free



“Love is always patient and kind; it is never jealous; love is never boastful or conceited; it is never rude or selfish; it does not take offense, and is not resentful.”



Looking up, a barely audible gasp escaped her lips when she realized where she had inevitably arrived. It would seem she could not escape after all, especially on this day. No, it would not fit for her to fight anymore, after all she was only fighting against the inevitable and losing horribly. It was a fruitless battle and she let herself succumb to the memories that only their anniversary could bring forth. With unseeing eyes, her mind conjured up the images of two soulmates sitting beneath the very willow she was no reclining beneath. And in her eyes she saw them celebrating their very first anniversary.


Sail through the wind and rain tonight
You're free to fly tonight
And you can still be free
If time will set you free



“Max, where are we going Max? Max!” The panic that had begun to fill her faded as soon as she felt the firm pressure of husband’s embrace.


“Max! I thought you left me!”


To this, her husband leaned in closer, until she could feel his hot breath on her neck, sending shivers of desire down hers spine. He whispered softly, sensually in her ear, his voice filled with promises, “I will never leave your side.” Liz smiled and he continued, “Ever.”


They shared a sweet kiss before he broke away from her and led her by the hand to wherever they were going. Feeling the breeze against her cheek, she smiled, having a small idea of where they were headed, and followed him without another word, merely content to be in his presence.


A few moments later, they arrived at their destination, and Liz was not surprised to find herself in their little corner of the park, his eyes were shining gently with love as she looked at the candles flitting softly, a picnic ready for them, but it would seem Max wasn’t done as he took her by the hand and led her towards the tree. As she neared the tree, her eyes instantly moved to where he had carved their initials not so long ago, and she gasped upon seeing another heart, right beneath with the initials M.E. + L. E.


“This proves to the world that you’re mine forever.” He whispered gently, catching her sigh with his lips as he started to sway her to the music only they could hear.



Just as suddenly it had come, the memory faded away, stored behind the walls she had thrown up against the world and her husband. As the image of the lovers faded from her mind, a voice whispered the rest of its speech in her mind causing her to falter as tears once again fell from her eyes, perhaps what they shared had not been love at all.


“Love takes no pleasure in other people’s sins but delights in the truth; it is always ready to excuse, to trust, to hope, and to endure whatever comes.”


Reaching out, she touched the evidence of their once strong love, pulling away slightly she noticed that she could barely make out the etched letters. They seemed to be fading just as fast as her marriage had, and the mere thought left her bitter as she remembered just what had caused the failed marriage. They had both loved too much, but in the end, their love was not enough to endure fate’s plans.


And going higher than mountain tops
And go high the wind won't stop
And go high



Her hand dropped silently to her side, as she headed to the place she lived, no longer a place to be called home, just a place where she dwelled until the inevitable death came to claim her too. As she walked away, the rain began to fall gently to the earth. With her back turned, she did not see the swaying of the willow’s leaves as it wept for her loss.


Free to fly tonight
Free to fly tonight
**You Can Still Be Free, Savage Garden**



~*~


Gasping, she choked softly on the alcohol she nursed in her glass as the day’s events caught up to her along with the past ten years of marriage with her husband. Suddenly the atmosphere of the bar seemed too tight, suffocating her. She gasped for breath as she glanced around the room, her eyes taking in blurry figures. She had to get out of here, had to escape before she drowned even further.


“Hey lady, you ok?” She distantly heard a voice called out to her as she stood up shakily and stumbled. Immediately she latched onto the side of the bar as the world spun around her and as the earth fell from beneath her. Through the haze, a hand reached out, “Elizabeth Parker-Evans?”


She distantly heard a voice respond, was that her voice? She couldn’t be sure as she clutched the hand. Vaguely she was aware of the tightening of the grip on her hand as she was pulled along behind the person. She tried to protest but her muddled mind could barely comprehend what was happening. Allowing herself to be pulled along, she began to become more aware of her surroundings as she felt the cool rain against her skin. How did I-?


Her thoughts were halted when she felt a tightening on her wrist and it was then she remembered the person from the bar. Something stirred inside of her and she was suddenly gripped with fear. She tried to pull away, but whoever held her refused to let go and she was suddenly thrown against something hard, her head flying backwards, hitting the wall forcefully, and she could have sworn she heard a crack.


She tried to pull herself up, but the injury acquired from the force of being thrown back and the alcohol were not working with her as she found herself once again slumped against the wall. The earth fell away beneath her as she was lifted in the air all of a sudden, and she heard a soft cruel laughter as her feet dangled beneath her.


“What are you doing man? This isn’t part of the job, we’re supposed to gut the bitch and split.”


“Shut up Hartman, no one said we couldn’t play with her a little.”


“We’re going to get caught! Just do it. We don’t have times for games.”



The world spun around her as the voices echoed around her.


…couldn’t play with her a little…


We don’t have times for games.


We’re going to get caught!


…couldn’t play with her a little…


Just do it.



Somewhere in her mind, she recognized the voices, and abruptly, the world seemed to come back into focus as she snapped out of her drunken stupor, immediately recognizing the situation she was in. Her instant reaction was to start struggling, which she did, but she was in the air and his grip was too strong, she had no advantage at all.


Mustering all her strength, she bit down into the hand holding her hostage, and as soon as he dropped her, she was off and running blindly towards what she hoped to be the parking lot. The rain fell heavily around her as she ran against its onslaught, the wind whipping her hair away from her body. The only thought running through her mind was that she had to get away. She had to get to Max.


Even through the anger, pain, and a broken marriage, her heart still recognized that he was the only one who could ever protect her. From everything it would seem, except herself. The thought faltered her, and she slipped against the wet pavement, and she threw her hands forward to break her fall, but it never happened, she was pulled upwards and against a hard male chest. His breath touched her face and she tried to wretch away again, but he would not let her go.


“Who are you?!” She cried, her voice muffled in the harsh rain.


“You know who I am.”


His calm voice penetrated and her vision became even clearer as she stared down at the man. A gasp escaped her upon recognition of the man who had haunted her nightmares since that night. A man she had spent the last six years of her marriage trying to find.


A smirk spread across his lips when he saw the recognition in her eyes. He set her down, but did not relinquish his hold on her. He almost laughed when he saw that spark in her lifeless eyes.


“You bastard!” Wrenching her arm from him, tears once again pulled in her eyes as she slapped him. “You unbelievable ba-”


He grabbed her, stopping her sentence as he forcefully shoved her to the ground. She cried as he threw his weight onto her, struggling against him until he slapped her again, subduing her. He pressed his lips roughly against her, she pulled away roughly, spitting in his face. He flinched back, and slapped her again. This seemed to fuel her on as she began to scream loudly.


“Shut up!” He commanded gruffly as he pulled at her coat, trying to pull it from her body. She screamed again, trying to fight him, her mind filling with anger at what happened that night when her life ended, and she felt renewed strength as she pushed him with such force, catching him off guard. She cried out as she ran fiercely from him, the heels of her boots clicking as her heart pounded in her chest.


She heard his pounding footsteps behind her, and that only served to spur her on as she fled from the man who had taken her life from her. She was hardly paying attention and ran straight into a wall, rather another man who looked down at her with a gleam in his eye. She glanced up at him before she quickly ran the other way, finding herself blocked off by a third man. Looking to her right, she saw him staring at her, laughing cruelly at her as he walked towards her in a more sedate pace as the other two grabbed her arm and pulled her back. She struggled against them until she felt a soft puncture in her right arm and the world faded from view as a whisper escaped her lips.


“Max.”


tbc...


Author's Notes Err...how was it?? Was it too bad?? I apologize if it was. I'm still trying to beat writer's block. I'm trying my best, and I hope it's ok? Anyway, please just tell me what you think.

Oops, forgot to say, just editing to add that the quote I used for Max's speech at their wedding is a Bible verse... at least I'm sure it is. I'm not too sure at the moment, excuse me, I'm sick and it's late. ::Sigh:: Anyway, you might remember it from A Walk To Remember

[ edited 7 time(s), last at 26-Dec-2002 11:32:37 AM ]
posted on 4-Feb-2003 7:24:24 PM by talena
Quick Note:

I just wanted to thank everyone for the support and bumps! I hadn't written in a while, and that part was forced out on my part. I'm still experiencing writer's block, but there are bursts of inspirations here and there, and since I have a holiday this Friday, I'll spend the day trying to write the new part. Hopefully I'll have it out by Friday, Sunday at the latest. Thanks again(Especially ILYMEFOREVER) for the support!

Love,
talena*tongue*
posted on 13-Feb-2003 5:54:22 PM by talena
Author's Note:

Hey everyone,

I know I promised to have a part out last week, however things came up. I'm sure many of you know that I have stepped down from being a moderator at this board. It was a rash decision at first, but I have no regrets. Honestly, I didn't feel comfortable being a part of a group who refused to listen to others. I don't want to sound bitter or anything. I'm not really. It's just been a tiring week and a half. Last weekend was probably the worst for this board and many of it's members. I am sorry to see everyone leave, and I hate to do this, but I'm also thinking of leaving, althought not permanently yet. I have many obligations here, including cover arts. I'll be following this board to the new server, just so I can have contact with those who I still need to make banners for.

I hope everyone can understand why I've decided to leave. Believe me, it wasn't an easy decision to make. This place has been my home and haven for the past two years, and its board members have been like family to me. This is why I need to leave now. I want to leave the board with good memories, not bitter ones and I think if I stay any longer, I may grow to resent this place. To be honest, I don't feel comfortable posting here anymore either. Things were said, feelings were hurt, and I'm tired of it all. I'll continue writing, but as for posting here, I'm not too sure about that. I'll let you know as soon as I decide.

Thanks for all your support!

Hugs,
Jen

BTW: Just because I may not post here anymore does not mean I won't be updating my fics. I've relocated them to Outer Haven. I don't have a link now, but I'll come back later. Or you just may see the link in someone's sig nowadays. All my love!*happy*

[ edited 1 time(s), last at 13-Feb-2003 5:56:25 PM ]