posted on 7-Sep-2002 12:25:43 AM by sweetivy420
Title - If These Stars Could Scream
Author - Sweetivy420
Category - Mainly Max/Liz
Disclaimer - Nothing to do with the owning anything
Summary - This is all I am giving away................
“Don’t worry you won’t remember her where were going”
-Tess in Departure

Authors Notes - I didn’t really see a lot of Season 3 so this is all on summarys and what I have heard online. This story takes place 2 years after Graduation so or Roswillians will be about 20. Since I don’t know every detail of Season 3 I won’t be referring to it a lot like I will be 1 and 2.


I’m Liz Evans and today I cradled my husbands dead body in my arms. After the tears that I thought would never stop spilling finally ended I was filled with this numbness. The thoughts keep swirling in my head but they seem more surreal and less real than they did earlier.
Maria is still crying I don’t think she stopped. When Alex died Michael was their to hold her and give her some comfort. but Michael isn’t here he lays with Max and Isabel in the shallow grave in the roswell dessert. We shouldn’t of come back. We know that now.
Maria is cradled with Kyle in the back of the van where he provides little comfort with his own tears falling. We lost our family today. It doesn’t really get worse than that.
I feel empty without him here holding me as I vent in my journal. The two years we spent in this old van have been the happiest days of my life. It wasn’t a normal marriage but then again what is so great about normal. He said that to me once the night, Kyle got him drunk and we were all living in the delusion that our lives were normal we didn’t know then how wrong we were.
I miss Maria and Michael arguing over the space in the back of the van. Usually Michaels was the one to lose with Kyle’s feet in his face, I miss Isabel’s talks and even her witty Buddha comebacks to Kyle that usually happened at this time at night but it wouldn’t not tonight not ever again.
But most of all I’ll miss Max waking up with him brushing the stray hairs off my face. I’ll miss his lips on mine. Or the way he held me through the night. I can feel the wall building around my heart because tonight I lost the love of my life.

She looked back now at Maria who’s sobs have turned into little hiccups as she falls into a sleep. Kyle places a blanket on top of her whispering words in her ear as she drifts into sleep. Kyle begins to make his way across the van towards the front where Liz sat. The one Max used to occupy when she wrote. The back light of the motel sign spills on his face where she can now see the visible tears streaks.

“Its okay you know to cry I won’t hold it against you.” Kyle spoke for the first time she just realized she had stopped writing and was now looking off towards the busy streets that led out of Roswell away from the cave away from them. “You don’t have to be the brave one Liz, you did that with Alex.” He looked in the direction she was looking as she spun her head to look at the person she considered one of her brothers.

“I can’t.” She slowly let out. He turned back around to her questioning with his eyes ‘why’ She met his eyes and he could she the little streaks of wetness making its way down her face unwillingly. He didn’t think she noticed the crack her voice had. “Because if I breakdown again if I really let it all go then I see it again and I realize..” She stopped as her tears fell freely down her face kyle didn’t interrupt her he knew to let her let it out on her own. When she continued she wasn’t really looking at anything just staring off eyes glazed over. “...he’s not really on a food run and he won’t be coming through that door any minute to hold me at night and that means he’s really gone.” His heart ached all over again as she looked at him straight in the eyes. “Max is gone, Max is gone, Max is gone.” She repeated over and over again shaking her head. When she finally stopped she looked up at Kyle. “We lost our family Kyle.”

Those where her last words as Kyle held her in a tight hug letting her tears spill with his the rest of the night until she drifted off into a fitful sleep. He didn’t sleep the rest of the night just making silent vows to his dead members of his family. He would protect the girls if it was evil aleins, FBI, or something bigger.


So tell me what you think If I get a really good amount of feedback I will try to have the next part out by either tonight or tommorrow. but I have to know if it should be continued so tell me thanx

[ edited 5 time(s), last at 7-Sep-2002 10:55:01 PM ]
posted on 7-Sep-2002 4:10:33 AM by sweetivy420
Part 1

They ate when they had to. Spoke when needed. Living if you would call it that. It had been 2 weeks since the death. They where now in Toronto Canada. Liz wanted to see Niagara Falls, but then she remembered who she wanted to see it with and quickly shut her mouth.

All three of them were working in a dinner making as much money as possible. They didn’t have Isabel changing their ones to hundreds anymore so money was precious. The van was parked in a deserted back street no one really ever stopped by.

Work....Sleep.... it was their routine and eating when Kyle forced them to along with himself.

“I got sandwiches.” Kyle said pushing the white plastic containers towards the girls

Liz was staring at the wall an unreadable expression on her face if you were anyone else, but if you knew her you would know it was a tremendous amount of pain running through her. He placed the container in her shaky hands meeting her eyes with one word “Eat”

Maria’s expression was more readable as the tears spilled down her face she clung the sandwich in her hands holding it so tightly some of the meat had fell out. Her expression was readable to anyone who looked at her she was in torture. Kyle loosened her hold on the sandwich as she met his eyes.

“Michael liked turkey.” She stated taking a forced bite of her sandwich. Liz looked over at her friend having no room to comfort she just stared with helpless eyes. Kyle put his hand on her shoulder.

“I know.” He said simply. Turning to his own food that looked less appealing by the second. It hurt him he couldn’t do anything for his girls.


Liz was sitting on top of the van Kyle slept she didn’t hear Maria get out until she was sitting right next to her looking at the woods that surrounded her. Maria offered Liz a extra blanket she brought out and Liz accepted gratefully wrapping it around herself.

They enjoyed the silence for a while longer until Maria broke it. “I miss them.” She said simply. She looked up at the sky above her noticing the stars.

“Me too.” Liz replied following Maria’s gaze up to the sky.

“I’ve been thinking....” Maria started. Her pause indicating her nervousness on whatever she wanted to bring up. “We never really said who did it.” Both girls tensed up.

“I’m not going to do this Maria I did it with Alex and it almost killed me.” She looked at Maria trying to be firm in her decision.

“Were already dead Liz.” She said as simple as possible. “What you did for Alex saved lives you saved Max, Michael, and Isabel from getting killed.” She said turning to Liz trying her best to plead with her bloodshot eyes and red nose.

“Yeah little good that did” Liz mumbled but when she saw Maria’s face she knew she heard her.

“We wouldn’t of had the last three years if it weren’t. Liz the past three years have meant everything to me like I knew it did you. Do you really regret it?” Maria’s anger was flared as she spoke each word.

“I-I” Liz stuttered. “I hate this, if the last three years wouldn’t of happened we wouldn’t hurt the way we do now we wouldn’t of had to buried them in the ground. After holding their body’s . It wouldn’t feel as if everything was dead.” She cried openly now as Maria held her close her own tears following Liz’s. “I know its selfish” She admitted pulling from Maria and wiping her eyes

“It’s not selfish I think the same thing most days its just. I have to know Liz.” Maria stated. She could feel She could see her best friend try so hard to fight with an argument inside herself when she finaly looked back up at Maria she said the words that made them feel a little bit more again.

“I do too.” she agreed.

The list wasn’t that long. but it was long enough to still hurt and hurt was somewhat good to Liz at least it wasn‘t numb. Kyle didn’t like what they were doing. He knew in the end it would just break them more but they stood beside their decision to find the truth and that is what kept them going it kept them from thinking of their future or going to sleep and waking up just to fall back to sleep again it kept them a little sane.

‘The List’ Liz looked it over again


Liz didn’t like other. Other meant they didn’t know and it was something beyond their control of discovering. Other meant they wouldn’t find the truth and it meant they had to go back to thinking of the ones that left them.

She went over the evidence again in her head as she sat in the alley on her break.

No visible wounds.
Near the cave.
No looks of a struggle.
Possible trap

She stopped and began to think back to that afternoon...............


“In the van I know we already went over it quite a few times.” Liz said smirking at her husband.

“It won’t be long we just need to check out the cave and that’s it.” Max said putting a stray strand of hair behind his wife’s ear.

“Do you think it might be a trap.” She couldn’t help the question escaping her mouth. They traveled for eight days from San Jose, California. Because all three of the podsters got a weird vibe that told them to go to the cave. She knew he was thinking the same thing.

“I don’t know?” He said as he pulled her close holding her tight to his chest as she listened to his heartbeat. “That’s why you are staying here if it is a trap then the three of us will handle it.” He kissed the crown of her head and pulled her up to look a him.

“I love you.” She vowed

“I love you too,” He said as they shared a heated kiss one that was on longing and promises to come. Like all of Max’s kisses they always held her high and never let her down. “So much.”

They were about to go on when Isabel popped her head in the door interrupting their love fest. “My god you two can’t stay apart for an hour its kind of sickening .” Isabel said with a playful smile as she looked between her brother and sister-in-law. It was true the only time they spent apart really was when their was a food run or odds and ends jobs.

“Right their with ya babe” Maria said coming up next to Isabel to share in a laugh with her friend.

“Fine, Fine, Fine make fun of the newly-weds” Liz said throwing her hands up in the air as a gesture of surrender. She got off of Max’s lap as they made their way outside. It was their meeting place back in sophomore year when Topolsky returned and their lives got more complicated than expected.

“Its been two years your not newly-weds anymore.” Michael said coming up to their cliff they shared on some pretty intense meetings at.

“Give them a break you know they just want to justify the-never-out-of-my-site thing.” Said Kyle playfully punching Max in the arm as he came up from behind.

“I think were out numbered” Said Liz getting into their playful banter. Also getting a smile from Max

“Anyways enough Max Liz bashing lets get to the game plan.” Said Isabel trying to putting a serious face on.

“Alright here’s the deal Kyle, Liz and Maria stay here first sign of Danger you drive out to the cave but their probley won’t be anything to be worried about so just stay here and we should be back in an hour or so. whatever you do don't go into town” Said Max setting what he thought was a simple plan.

They all said their goodbyes as Max and Liz shared a good-bye kiss not knowing how true it would be. Touching the place where her heart lay he looked into her eyes and said the words he had been saying to her for the last two years. “Always.” She smiled at him and pecked his lips one last time.

“and forever.” She finished.


Liz broke the memory not wanting to relive anymore of it. Just then she noticed the wetness on her cheeks she didn’t understand how she could cry and not know it. but then again she did. SHe needed to not think about these things at work she realized and dodged into the bathroom to clean up her face for the last two minutes of her break.


I just felt like posting another part because I don’t think the story was justified enough in the beginning. Thank you to those of you who have left me feedback already, it is sad and it will be that way for a while just remember things aren’t always what they seem..... Tell me if this justifies it better

posted on 7-Sep-2002 10:54:10 PM by sweetivy420
I might have 2B out by tonight. It depends

Part 2A

Maria stood wiping tables the store just closed up and she was left to close with Liz. They had been in Toronto for a month and that was something new being in one place more than a couple of weeks. She couldn’t help the frustrations going through her mind.

Liz was behind the counter filling the sugar container when she heard it. The newly filled salt and pepper shaker and table’s turning over. Maria’s face was tight as she took her frustration out on the table. Liz was next to her in an instant holding her close while she screamed.

“Its not fair!!” She said one last time before burring her head in Liz’s welcoming shoulder. “Why?” She mumbled over and over while Liz made soothing noises.

“It will be okay.” Liz tried promising her friend not believing a word of what she was saying. “Its going to be okay.”


On a planet far away...................

Zan stormed into his office slamming the door shut behind him. He found Rath sitting in a chair shaking his head.

“Shut up.” He said going to his window that led to a balcony staring out into the sky. The two moons were set beautifully in the night. Shinning down at the now free Antar. It took them about a month to take back control of the planet that was run by Kivar. When they returned from a Earth they couldn’t remember.

“Frustrated much.” Rath said pouring himself a drink and standing beside his troubled King and friend. “What did Ava not put out last night.” Rath smirked he loved getting under Zan’s skin.

“I had another dream.” He said avoiding Rath’s look. “Have you had any lately?” Zan questioned looking at his friend.

“Not lately.” He took a sip of his drink and looked at Zan again. “Was it the same girl?” He got a nod from Zan and a far off concentrating look in his eyes.

“I still can’t remember what she looked like.” Zan thought back to the dream he felt so at peace holding his mystery girl in his arms. He remembered when he woke up looked down. Only he couldn’t remeber who he looked down at.

“You have a meeting with the four other planet leaders today.” Rath said trying to get rid of that far off look in his friends eyes.
Zan just frowned being the Leader of Antar was one thing but also the King of the four leaders was another. He wondered if their was a time where he felt not as weighed down and free to do as he wanted maybe he had that on Earth of course he would never know because he couldn’t remember.


Back on Earth...............

Liz sat in the middle of the van with Maria and Kyle as she just moved things around her spaghetti hoping it would satisfy Kyle enough and not make him force feed her. Sometimes she wondered if he would actually do it she wouldn’t put it past him.

Her eyes kept drifting to the back mattress the one she used to share with Max. She remembered when she felt upset how Max would lay her down on it and rub her back soothingly as her face nestled on his chest.

Kyle caught her longing look and tried to make conversation . He knew he should know better by now. Liz would just nod sadly, and Maria would make a few low noises in her throat he would assume as a yes or no. But never the less he tried all the same.

“What did you guys do today?” God he sounded more and more like a parent everyday trying to drag information from stubborn teens. Like expected Liz just shrugged and turned back to her spaghetti. WHile Maria made a noise he thought sounded like a nothing.

“How about them bulls?” He started hoping to get a smile out of one of them or maybe more than one word from one of them. Liz shrugged like expected. and maria made a noise that sounded like dunno.

Why did he even try...........


I need feedback I am thinking about ending this fic but if I get a good response then I probley won’t