|posted on 28-Dec-2001 6:11:16 AM by sugarplum17|
|Title: Flesh and Bone|
Disclaimer: The characters from Roswell do not belong to me. I just like dicking around with them and making them do what I want them to do. So like I said, they’re not mine. Don’t sue me.
Category: UC/CC, but in the end...if you've read any of my other fics, you know how it'll end.
Author’s Note: I wrote a story a while ago that I never posted, and so I’m changing a few things around from that story, basically just the POV and I’m posting it. AU, no aliens. It's only gonna be angsty for a little while and I guarantee a happy ending.
- - -
‘Oh god no.’ She thought to herself as she sat on the lid of the toilet. Her bare feet were freezing against the cold tile. She was shivering slightly, silently chiding herself for not wearing warmer pajamas. What was she thinking wearing boxers and a West Roswell tee shirt to bed?
“How can this be?” She asked herself as she looked up at the white ceiling, a look of complete horror on her face. She thought back to every time they’d done it. They were safe. He always wore a condom.
She wondered, as she sat on her toilet and looked up at the white ceiling of her bathroom how far along she was. She wondered if it was even his. He’d been her first, as well as her most recent, but there had been others. Two to be exact. Maybe it’d been one of them? But she knew that they couldn't be. Beside the fact that they'd been safe, she would've known about it sooner.
Staring down at the stick in her hand with the plus sign, she sighed. Her parents were going to kill her. She could not be pregnant. She wasn’t ready to be pregnant. She didn’t even have a boyfriend! How was she going to explain this to them? How was this going to affect her dreams?
All of the plans she’d made for her future, her perfect life that she’d planned out when she was 10, she could feel slipping out of her grasp at that very moment as she sat on her toilet staring at that stick in her hands.
Knock, knock, knock. “Are you ok in there?” She heard her best friend softly ask from the other side of the door. “What does it say?”
There was no way she was going to hide something this huge from her best friend. The second she’d suspected it, she’d spoke up about it. Staring down at the stick she took a deep but shaky breath. “Um...” Her voice wavered.
“I’m coming in.” The door opened, and the blonde kneeled before her. “What does it say, sweetie?” she asked, part of her already knowing, looking down at the stick.
“It’s ok.” She said reassuringly. “Everything will be fine.”
Her gaze shifted from the stick to her kneeling friend. Maria’s hands were resting on her knees, and she was trying her best to remain up beat and positive. To be reassuring and supportive. And in that moment Liz Parker had never loved her best friend more. In that moment, even with the both of them knowing that it wouldn’t be ok, that everything wouldn’t be fine, Liz Parker loved Maria Deluca simply for trying.
TBC? Short I know... Um I don’t know why I’m calling it Flesh and Bone. It’s just the name of an Alien Ant Farm song that I like...so yeah.
[ edited 18time(s), last at 3-May-2002 4:24:44 AM ]
|posted on 28-Dec-2001 8:12:07 AM by sugarplum17|
|Author’s Note: Just a little warning, if you’re an abortion-sensitive person, this might offend you. But don’t read it, get offended and then just give up on it. Give it a chance. I might surprise you. You know...what if she can’t go through with it?|
- - -
“We’ll go to a clinic, a free one.” Maria said as she and Liz walked out of the bathroom. She motioned for Liz to sit on the bed while Maria went to her dresser and pulled out a pair of socks and a pair of jeans and threw them on the bed next to Liz. “Put those on.” She ordered as she also threw a bra onto Liz’s pile of clothes. “That too.”
“We’ll see how far along you are, that way you can figure out who the father is, because I mean...you obviously have to tell him.” She continued as she went to Liz’s closet and disappeared into it, reemerging moments later with a sweat shirt that said West Roswell Track on the back of it. She tossed it on Liz’s bed and left the room.
Liz sat there, motionless on her bed. This was not happening to her. She was dreaming. And if in fact she was dreaming, she might as well just make herself wake up. “Wake up.” She whispered to herself. When nothing happened she sighed and cradled her head in her hands. Just as she was about to cry, just as she could feel the tears starting to pierce and sting her eyes, and her back began to tingle, Maria re-entered the room holding Liz’s tennis shoes and coat in her hands.
She’d startled Liz. That much Maria could see, but it wasn’t the only thing she could see. The tears. They were threatening to spill over. Her back was probably tingling like crazy, like it always did when she was about to cry. Dropping the coat and shoes onto the floor, she quickly crossed the room and crawled across the bed, situating herself next to Liz on the edge and holding her arms out, a worried expression gracing the pretty features of her face. Her heart constricted in her chest as Liz’s own pretty facial features crumpled, her eyes closed and a tear slowly slid down her cheek.
Pulling her into a hug, Maria gently rubbed her back. “That’s it, let it all out hon. It’ll be ok.” She cooed softly, in the most reassuring voice she could manage.
Liz wanted to tell her that it wasn’t. She wanted to tell Maria that this wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted to say that she would rather kill the life growing inside of her rather than disappoint her parents. That she would rather not carry this baby that grew inside of her womb, because she wanted to go to Harvard. She wanted to be a scientist. She didn’t want to be a mom. She wanted to tell Maria, but she didn’t, and she wouldn’t. She would never voice the feelings that she felt. Because when she was 15, she’d made a pact.
- - -
She’d been laying on Maria’s bean bag, flipping through an old issue of Cosmo that had come addressed to Maria’s mother months ago and talking about sex. Maria had said, “You know, if I ever get pregnant...and it’s...unplanned, I’d never abort it.”
Liz had looked up from the magazine and said, “Oh I know. That is so wrong...why would anyone want to kill a poor defenseless baby?”
Maria had said, “We should make a pact. If we’re going to spread our legs for someone to enter, we’re going to spread them for another to exit.”
Liz had giggled, reached her arm up to rest on Maria’s bed and held out her pinky. Maria had taken it with her own pinky and they had repeated the words together.
But now, she understood. She was in those shoes, wearing them snugly on her feet. There wasn’t even room to wiggle her toes. She knew now what it was like to know that you had created a life that was going to ruin your own.
- - -
Liz waited, shifting her weight in the chair and mindlessly bouncing her knee up and down. She clutched Maria’s hand tightly in her own, like if she let it go, she would die. They’d been waiting in the lobby of the Safe Sex Clinic for nearly 10 minutes but it felt like 10 hours to Liz. And finally when the nurse came to get her, she had literally pry her hand from Maria’s, telling them that Maria couldn’t come back with them.
And so it was with a great amount of reluctance that Liz left her life line and followed the nurse into the office. She undressed quickly and put on the gown they gave her. And when it was over, she asked the doctor a few questions and got the number of an abortion clinic before hurriedly getting dressed. Hiding the number in her pocket.
As Liz walked down the hall and into the lobby she found Maria slouching in the chair she’d left her in, playing with her curly hair. From the time they were Freshmen in High School, Maria had experimented with her look. Her freshman year, she’d had a Doctor Spock type of ‘do. Her sophomore year, she had let it grow out some and flipped out the ends, giving her a cute little girlish look. During her junior year it’d been long with luscious curls. This year, for her senior year, it was shoulder-length with beautiful ringlets.
“How did it go?” Maria asked, jumping up from her seat. “What did the doc say?”
“I have to call back for the results tomorrow, but I’m pretty sure I know when it happened.” She said as she pushed through the heavy glass door and walked out into the crisp January weather. Tucking her hands under her arms to keep them warm on the way to Maria’s Jetta, she turned her head to her friend. “I’m pretty sure it happened that last time with Kyle right before we broke up.”
“I thought so too.” Maria said after getting into the car and starting it up. “I mean, you were only with Jimmy Martin like one time, and that was like three months ago. And Billy, that happened way before Jimmy.”
Liz nodded her head stiffly before looking out the window. “Yeah. I’m putting my money on Kyle.”
“How do you...you know...” Maria started, gesturing with her hands. “How do you think he’ll take it?”
Liz sighed heavily before rubbing her eyes and then running her hands over her face. “If I know Kyle, and I do, he’ll deny it. He’ll tell me its someone else’s baby, and then he’ll ignore me for the rest of the year.”
“What an ass.” Maria muttered as she pressed down on the accelerator, speeding up to get on the expressway. A glance in Liz’s direction had her regretting the statement of a very well known fact. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
Liz shook her head. “No, it’s fine. He is an ass. But...”
“But you still have feelings for him?” She asked, turning to look at her friend and then back to the road when Liz nodded her head.
Liz and Kyle had gone out when they were all sophomores. The relationship had suddenly thrust both Liz and Maria into the lime light of popularity at West Roswell. They were suddenly being invited to all the big social events, and even being asked to sit with all the “in” people at lunch. But by the summer, Kyle and Liz were having problems, and the relationship ended. Maria and Liz had still managed to hang on to their new found popularity, and Liz dated around a bit. When their junior year rolled around, Kyle had come crawling back to her, talking about how much of a mistake it’d been to break up with her and that he wanted her back. She’d caved and they started back up again, lasting until September of their senior year before they broke up once more and then started dating again a month later, lasting until December.
Her father had been in love with him. Kyle could do no wrong in Jeffery Parker’s eyes. As quarter-back, every pass that Kyle had thrown had been golden to him. Even if it’d been fumbled or he’d thrown it too far or short. As the sheriff’s son, he could do no wrong. Kyle Valenti was quite a catch, her father had always said. Liz should thank her lucky stars that she’d managed to snag him up. Was what he had told her, many times. His straight A, book-ish daughter, who in his eyes was quite beautiful, had managed to snag herself a good boy. Even when he’d caught the two in the break room of the Crashdown at two am, heavily making out and Kyle’s hand up his only daughter’s shirt while his other hand had been creeping up her skirt, he’d pretended he hadn’t seen it, and Kyle had done no wrong. Most father’s would’ve been absolutely livid at finding their daughter and her boyfriend at that hour, in that position and Liz wondered as they pulled up in front of the Crashdown, if her father would think of Kyle as a good boy now.
When Maria had dropped her off, Liz went upstairs and immediately pulled out that number the doctor had given her. Sitting in the big oversized and overstuffed chair next to her window she stared at it for what seemed like hours, her eyes finally drifting towards the phone that sat on her night stand.
Ok, no more until someone lets me know if they even want more. --Edited to say-- And thank you Veronica! You know, I think you've read just about every fic that I've ever written. Thanks man!
[ edited 2 time(s), last at 28-Dec-2001 8:16:50 AM ]
|posted on 28-Dec-2001 7:05:31 PM by sugarplum17|
|Yes Angel, you read all the fics too! You'll get your dreamer action, after a while.|
Well, according to the outline I wrote way back when I wrote this fic in Liz POV (which I'm switching to third person), Max, Isabel, Alex, Michael, and - yes Sniblette, even Tess - don't show up for a while. (She'll be a good Tess, I swear! A Tess that doesn't even notice Max. But...no, that's all I'm going to say.)
Alex and Tess will come before Max, Iz and Michael. Because none of them live in Roswell.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 28-Dec-2001 7:36:10 PM ]
|posted on 29-Dec-2001 2:27:42 AM by sugarplum17|
|AN: Kinda short but it’s all I can do right now. And thank you everyone for the fb!|
She stared at the phone for a few seconds before she let out a heavy sigh and crumpled the paper in her hand. She wanted to pick up that phone and make herself an appointment. She wanted to be able to pretend she hadn’t gotten pregnant, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to go through with it. She could talk herself up all she wanted, saying how much she didn’t want what was happening to her and how she could end it if she wanted to, but she knew that once she was finally there in that building, she wouldn’t be able to do it. Because it was one thing for her to think about killing the life that grew inside of her, but it was another to actually do it.
Pushing herself up from the chair she threw the paper into the trash can that sat beside her desk and then went over to her bed, pulling the covers back. There was nothing she wanted to do more at that moment than sleep, despite the fact that she’d just woken up close to three hours ago. Because Liz thought that when she was asleep she could forget about being pregnant. She could forget about the way Kyle was going to respond, about the way her parents were going to respond, and about the way everyone in school was going to respond. She could forget about the fact that she was never going to go to Harvard to become a scientist, because in her dreams, she could do exactly that. When her dark head of hair rested on the white pillow, she could close her eyes and dream of her dorm room, her room mate, her professors, her lab assignments, she could even dream about how heavy those damn biology books were going to be.
- - -
Liz was jarred awake what seemed like five minutes later as Maria burst through her door. Sleepily she rubbed her eyes and registered her intense need to pee.
“Ok chica. I’m here.” Maria said bouncing down on the bed and handing her the phone. “Call the clinic.”
Liz threw back the covers and hurriedly shuffled to her bathroom, closing the door behind her. “I can’t do that until tomorrow Maria.” She called from the toilet.
“Liz, babe, it is tomorrow.”
“WHAT?!” Liz asked, before flushing the toilet and quickly washing her hands. “I’ve been asleep for that long?”
“When did you go to bed?” Maria asked, noticing that she hadn’t taken off the jeans or sweat shirt that she’d worn the day before.
Sitting on the bed, she snuggled under the covers. “Right after you dropped me off. I came up stairs, sat around for a little while and then I crawled into bed and fell asleep.”
Taking the phone off the night stand, Maria set it down between them in the middle of the bed. “Ok...so call.”
Liz stared at it as if she’d never seen a telephone before. Like she didn’t know what it was or how to use it before hesitantly reaching out to grip the receiver. She closed her eyes, but didn’t pick it up. “Sweetie, it’s not going to go away if you close your eyes and pretend. Even if you don’t call...you’re still gonna be pregnant.”
“I know.” She said on a sigh, picking up the phone. “What’s that number again?”
- - -
“Ok, thank you. Goodbye.” She said into the mouth piece before gently placing it back on its cradle. “Just like I suspected, I’m about a month pregnant.”
“When are you gonna tell Kyle? Or your parents?” Maria asked carefully. She knew that Liz didn’t want to tell anyone that she wanted to keep it a secret or better yet, not have the baby at all. But she also knew that Liz had to tell Kyle, one way or the other because it was the right thing to do, and they both knew it.
“I think I’ll tell Kyle first, soon. Maybe next week. My parents...” She trailed off as she pushed a lock of dark hair behind her ear. “God, my parents. What am I going to say to them? Hey mom, hey dad guess what, I’m pregnant?”
“I mean, when should I tell them? Is there ever a right time to just lay something like that on them? Do I do it at dinner and if so what do I say?” She continued, pushing the blankets off of her and getting out of the bed. “I’m pregnant, could you pass the potatoes daddy?”
|posted on 29-Dec-2001 4:04:36 AM by sugarplum17|
|AN: Ok, so I really make Kyle out to be an ass in this part, but...try not to be too hard on him, he could redeem himself sometime later.|
One week later Liz nervously sat on Kyle Valenti’s couch fingering the hem of her black knee-length skirt. She had no clue why she had wanted to look so nice before she’d left the house, but for some odd reason she had. In the back of her mind she was hoping that he would take her into his arms, give her a sweet, gentle kiss and tell her that everything was going to be alright, that they would get through it together.
But she knew that was most definitely not going to be the case. There would be shouting, maybe some tears, there would be name calling, and there would be the inevitable look of disgust or even worse, hate. She didn’t want to see that because if he looked at her like he hated her, it would mean he really did. And in the back of her mind, in a corner of her heart, she kept hope that Kyle still loved her.
“Here you go.” Kyle said, sitting the can of coke in front of her on the coffee table. He was still baffled as to why she was here. They’d broken up and this time, it was for good. For the last time. He’d been furious after finding out that she slept with Jimmy, his best friend, only two weeks after they’d broken up in September. Not even the old, ‘I was upset, he was there and it just happened’ excuse would fly with Kyle. ‘We weren’t even together’ was not going to work for him either. She’d managed to keep it quiet all three months, and when the secret had finally come out of her closet he’d broken up with her on the spot then went to beat the crap out of Jimmy.
“So...” He said as he rubbed the palms of his hands together and sat down next to her. “What’s up?”
“Um Kyle, I need to tell you something.” She said nervously. “I...um...I’m-”
“Don’t say it.” He said, cutting her off. “Look, I’m flattered Liz, I really am but I told you it was over. I don’t want to go back out with you. I’m sorry.”
His words were like a knife in the heart. They hurt. The boy she loved was seriously rejecting her. Shaking off the rejection, she focused on her announcement. “That’s not what I was gonna say.”
“Oh.” Kyle said, feeling stupid. “Then by all means...”
Steeling herself, she squared her shoulders, lifted her head and focused her eyes on the black screen of the Valenti television. “I’m pregnant. The doctor said I’m about a month along.”
The silence was almost deafening and her senses became aware of everything. She could hear the distant ticking of the clock that hung on the kitchen wall. The hum of the furnace, and that slight buzzing that their refrigerator made. She could hear the kids running and playing outside, the cars passing by their house, a dog barking in the distance. The green blinking numbers on the VCR were drawing her attention. The chip crumbs on the coffee table stood out to her eye, like little rocks resting on the dark stained wood.
She was so alert that she nearly jumped off the couch when he finally said something. “It’s not mine.”
“Yes it is.” She said turning to look at his handsome face. “That last time before we broke up, something must’ve slipped through...I wasn’t with anyone else.”
“Yeah like you weren’t with Jim?” He asked heatedly. “It is not mine. It’s his.”
“We weren’t even together Kyle, when that thing with Jimmy happened. And that was back in September. It only happened once.” She shot back at him.
He scoffed and pushed himself up off the couch. “Whatever. How do I know that you’re telling the truth? You lied to me for nearly three months about Jim! So how do I know you hadn’t been fucking around behind my back the whole time? Oh and then remember Billy? How do I know you haven’t been messing around with him some more?”
“Kyle, I-” She started, pushing herself off the couch as well, intent on getting in his face.
“How do I know that this isn’t some little trap? A small town girl gets herself pregnant to trap a small town football hero so that she can either get the hell out or make him stay with her. Trap him into marriage. They make movies about that shit Liz!” He yelled, his face starting to flush with anger.
“I never needed you to get me out of this fucking town Kyle, so pull your head out of your ass you conceited bastard!” Liz yelled, shoving his chest with both hands. “I had a full ticket Kyle! I was gonna follow my dreams, I was gonna go to Harvard and become a scientist. I already had my scholarship and everything, why the fuck would I need you?”
“I can’t do any of that now. Do you think I could go to Harvard now?" She continued. "Do you think this is what I wanted? Because now I’m probably gonna stay in this fucking town for the rest of my life. I’ll end up like Agnes working in my dad’s restaurant when I’m 50!”
The flush from her anger was definitely spreading from her face to her chest as it did when she got mad. She could feel the tingles on her back, but refused to cry. She refused to let her eyes even start to tear up infront of him.
“That’s not my problem Liz! You should’ve thought about that before you spread your legs for Jimmy, you slut!” His head snapped to the side and his cheek was seriously stinging from the force of her tiny hand slapping against his face.
“You’re such an asshole Kyle.” She said, stomping over to the coat rack and retrieving her coat and purse. “You know it’s yours, don’t even try to pretend that you don’t or that it isn’t.”
She turned around quickly and walked to the front door reaching for the knob. “You just go ahead and pussy out Kyle. Don’t deal with the consequences of your actions and don’t be responsible. You just keep doing what you always do, what you seem to do best. I’ll take care of everything by myself, just like always.”
Slamming the door behind her, she shrugged into her coat before quickly walking to her car with angry steps.
- - -
Reaching out her hand she softly grabbed a hold of the knob on the red door before her. Not even the familiar second door knob just above the one in her hand could make her smile, as it usually did. Turning the knob, she opened up the door and walked into the Deluca house. Closing it behind her she shrugged off her coat and threw it over the back of a chair before tossing her purse onto the table and going over to the refrigerator.
Grabbing two cartons of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream and two spoons, she walked through the kitchen and pushed through the beads into the living room.
“Hi Amy.” She said to Mrs. Deluca as she sat in the middle of the floor and doing what appeared to be meditation.
“Hi sweetie. Maria is in her room.” The older woman said, not bothering to open her eyes.
Liz continued on her way down the hall and turned as she walked into Maria’s room. Her best friend immediately looking up from the magazine, she’d been reading. Tossing it aside Maria sat up in an Indian Style position and patted the mattress.
“Didn’t go so well huh?” She asked sympathetically as Liz took a seat on the bed and opened both containers of ice cream.
“Nope.” She said digging her spoon into the vanilla. “The short version goes like he said it wasn’t his, I said it was, he said I cheated on him, I said I didn’t, he said I was trying to trap him, I said I wasn’t, he called me a slut, I slapped him.”
She handed Maria the Chunky Monkey and extra spoon. “If it went that bad with him, I can’t wait to see how it goes with my parents.”
|posted on 29-Dec-2001 10:23:37 PM by sugarplum17|
|AN: So hopefully Kyle kind of redeems himself in this part. Because his heart is in the right place, even though he's kind of dense about it. I’m really proud of the Liz/Nancy scene too... |
Liz watched from the kitchen as her mother, in the living room, folded the laundry while she swayed her hips and softly sang an old Elvis Costello song. She’d been trying to tell her mother the entire week. At the moment, her mother was the only person Liz wanted to tell, but the words just wouldn’t leave her mouth. Or even form on her tongue. Every time she started she ended up saying something else, entirely different. And the more time that passed, the longer she waited, the harder it got.
“Mom, can I talk to you?” Liz asked, walking into the living room and sitting on the couch. “Woman to woman, as a friend?”
“Sure Liz.” Her mother said, leaving out any pet names that she had for her daughter, and sitting next to her on the couch. “What’s up?”
“Um, I have this friend.” Liz started, hoping that her mother would see through the old ‘I have this friend’ line. “And my friend...she’s, well she’s pregnant. She doesn’t know what she should do. She’s scared and she’s confused, and she’s upset. Mom, this friend...she’s gonna have to give up all her dreams because of this.”
“Wait why?” Nancy asked. “Why does your friend have to give up all her dreams? The girl’s got options, you know. There’s abortion and if she can’t go through with that, there’s adoption.”
“She can’t do abortion, and I don’t think she really wants to give it up for adoption either.” Liz said, looking at the carpet. “I mean, she doesn’t want this. She doesn’t want to be a mom because she’s not ready to, but...she doesn’t think that...she could just do that. She doesn’t think she could say, ‘Here you go, just take my baby away.’ You know? Like what if that turns out to be the real mistake and then she can’t do anything about it?”
“Anyway, that’s not what I’m asking here.” Liz continued. “My friend, we’ll call her Wilma. She wants to tell her parents about it. But Wilma, she’s like perfect in their eyes, her boyfriend, he’s perfect in their eyes. When Wilma looks into their eyes, she doesn’t want to see that perfect reflection of herself all dented and tarnished...and even if that didn’t matter...Wilma doesn’t even know how to tell them. I mean, what should she say to them?”
By now Nancy was starting to catch on. Her suspicions were getting the best of her. “Liz, who is Wilma?”
The look on her daughter’s face, the way that her daughter was gently swaying from side to side on the couch, itching her back gave Nancy the answer to her question. “What happened when Wilma told her boyfriend?”
“Um...It’s actually Wilma’s ex-boyfriend mom, and he told her that it wasn’t his and accused her of being a cheating slut when they were together.” Liz explained, feeling the tiniest bit of relief that her mother saw through her Wilma story.
“Wilma’s mother probably never liked him anyway.” Nancy said, encircling her daughter’s small frame in her arms. “She probably thought he was a jerk hiding behind a good boy’s smile.”
“So what should she do mom? What should she say?” Liz asked her mother in a shaky voice as she wrapped her own arms around her mother.
“I don’t know sweetpea.” Nancy said, her own voice wavering. “I don’t know what she should tell her parents, but I know that whatever happens, Wilma will be alright. And maybe they’ll be disappointed-sweetheart. Maybe her parents are going to look at her differently, just a little bit. But that doesn’t mean that they won’t love her just the same as they always have.”
After a good long cry, Nancy and Liz were both wiping their eyes. The conversation left Liz feeling a little better. She wasn’t feeling so alone anymore, she wasn’t feeling so scared. Her mother knew, and it was as if the weight on her shoulders had been lifted and she felt like she could fly.
“Hey mom?” Liz asked as she turned around at the beginning of the hall that lead to her bed room. “Um...don’t tell daddy ok? Not yet...I’m not ready for him yet.”
Nancy shot a small smile in her daughter’s direction. “I won’t sweetpea, I promise.”
“Hey mom?” Liz asked as her mother had turned back around. “I love you...and thanks...for everything.”
“I love you too, Liz, and you’re welcome.”
- - -
Two weeks later, Liz found herself infront of Senior Chows, her hands tucked under her arms to keep them warm, as she waited for Kyle to show up. When he finally did, they went into the building and were escorted to their table. After ordering there was a weird, awkward silence between them that was broken when Kyle noisily cleared his throat, signaling that he was going to speak.
“So I bet you’re wondering why I asked you here huh?” He asked her with a nervous chuckle. “I’m surprised you even came. I mean, I wouldn’t have blamed you if you didn’t.”
“I’m pretty surprised myself.” Liz said, looking away and picking up her water glass. “I wasn’t going to.”
“Well...I’m glad that you did.” Kyle said looking down at the table. “Because I really wanted to apologize to you for the way I acted.”
He went on when she said nothing. “You’re not a slut. I shouldn’t have said that. And I don’t even know what I was thinking with that whole ‘you’re trying to trap me’ speech I gave you.”
“Ok, but I haven’t heard the apology yet.” Liz told him, sitting her water down and looking at him.
“I’m sorry. Really, really sorry. I was a complete asshole.” Kyle said, looking up to meet her stare.
“You should be.” She told him, leaning back in her chair. “And you’re right. You were a complete asshole.”
The conversation lagged for a few moments, turning into a heavy silence. Once again, her senses became aware. She was aware of the people who were laughing, of the people who were whispering. The waiters, she could hear them taking orders. Silverware clinking against flatware could be heard. Shuffling feet, swinging doors, easy listening music.
“Thank you.” She said, as her plate was set down infront of her.
Kyle picked up his fork and looked down at his food. “I got accepted to Michigan today. U of M.”
“Oh?” Liz asked, sounding uninterested even to her own ears. “Congratulations Kyle.”
“Thanks.” He managed to tell her before stuffing some food into his mouth. “I want you to come with me. When I go.”
A surprised Liz, looked up from her food, wondering if she’d just heard that right. “Excuse me?”
“It’s not fair. I get to leave this town and now you don’t. Maybe you never needed me to get you out of here before...but you do now.” He told her, looking up from his food. “I don’t want you to be Agnes. You’ll be miserable here. I don’t want that. I don’t want the kid to grow up hating me because I left. Abandonment scars can be ugly and deep Liz. I should know.”
Ignoring that last part of his speech, she focused on the first. “Why are you always so conceited Kyle? I didn’t need you before but I do now? What the hell? Like I can’t raise a baby by myself and get out of Roswell at the same time?”
“Liz, it would be so much easier for you if you came with me. My graduation money pooled with yours, we could afford a fairly nice apartment. I could get a job, you could get a job until its time for you to not work anymore, and we’d make it.” He imploringly told her.
“This isn’t a movie Kyle.” She told him as she leaned into the table. “You’re not gonna take me out of this town and then we’ll live happily ever after in our lovely little apartment with our beautiful little baby.”
“You’re on a scholarship at U of M, that much I know. A football scholarship. You have to keep up your grades. You have to go to practice. You have to go to away games. And you think you’re going to have a job and support me and a baby? You think that you’re going to have time to spend with the baby?” She continued. “I mean really Kyle, do you honestly think that you’re going to have time to eat, sleep, study, go to school, go to practice and work, play your games both home and away and take care of a baby?”
His silence said everything. He obviously hadn’t given a whole lot of thought to the plan he’d devised. “I guess...I didn’t think-”
“Yeah. You didn’t.” Liz said curtly, cutting him off. “You never do.”
Looking down at his plate once more, he folded his hands in his lap. “I deserve that. I deserve any hostile words or feelings that you have toward me.”
“I know.” She said picking up her fork again and shoving a mouth full of food in.
“Then I’ll just...stay, here in Roswell with you.” He said sadly. “I’ll turn down the scholarship and stay.”
“No, you won’t.” She told him sternly. “You’re taking it. You’re not gonna resent me and the baby for the rest of your life because you didn’t go play football for U of M. You’re good Kyle but you’re not NFL material. You’ll be back before you know it.”
“An injury may cause you to come back sooner. Because let’s face it Kyle, academically, you’re not good enough for the University of Michigan.” She knew her words hurt his feelings when he closed his eyes. If there was one thing Kyle hated, it was being called a dumb jock. “What? Truth hurts? Payback is too much of a bitch?”
He would take whatever she wanted to throw at him. It was her turn now. He’d had his that day in his house when she’d told him she was pregnant with his child. If she wanted to hurl insults at him, he would let her, and he wouldn’t lift a finger to defend himself.
“I’ll go to Michigan Kyle.” She told him, watching as his head lifted up and his eyes opened in surprise. “But not with you. Because I do not need you. I’m not so sure I even want you anymore.”
“I’ll go because, even though you’re an asshole, my baby deserves to have a father. And even though you’re an asshole, you deserve to be in your baby’s life.” She said as she stood up and put on her coat before walking out of the restaurant, leaving him sitting there.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 30-Dec-2001 3:45:55 AM ]
|posted on 30-Dec-2001 12:14:29 AM by sugarplum17|
|Dude, Latahart, you're so close on some of those things! I'm still debating on a few things here and there, but you were pretty close.|
Thanks to all the new readers who left feedback and all the new readers that will leave feedback. Thanks to all the old readers who left feedback and all the old readers who will leave feedback later. It encourages me. Really, it does.
|posted on 30-Dec-2001 5:40:58 AM by sugarplum17|
|AN: Funny you should wonder about that Sniblette, because it just so happens I have that part right here. Man, I’m pretty hard on Kyle. Lol, I guess I kind of wanted him to be one of those guys that says the wrong thing at the absolute wrong time. So he is now.|
Liz paced around her room, holding the phone in her hand listening to Maria’s incessant babble. For the last five minutes Maria had been listing things that she’d need when they moved to Michigan and how much fun they were going to have.
Twirling the cord around her finger, Liz smiled the first real smile her lips had seen in months. The second she’d got home she’d run to her room and called Maria, telling her how the dinner with Kyle had went. Maria had almost made her deaf shrieking, “WHAT?!” when Liz had told her about Kyle’s proposition. And she’d squealed and laughed so loud, Liz thought she might’ve popped an ear drum, when she had told her about telling Kyle off.
“Lizzie, I’m so proud of you!” Her best friend had said from the other end of the line.
Then when Liz had told Maria that she was actually going to go, just not with Kyle. Maria had grown quiet.
“I was kind of hoping...that you would want to come with me?” Liz had tentatively said to the girl who had been her best friend since they were crapping in their diapers. “Because, I mean, I couldn’t do it alone...”
Maria had screamed of course so loud that Liz had to jerk the phone away from her ear. And then Maria had started the babbling. Listing off everything they would need for their apartment. She’d inhaled once, told Liz that they needed to start planning, exhaled and then started babbling again.
A few minutes later when Maria finally ran out of things they would need when they moved, she started babbling about how she was going to be the best Aunt, Liz’s baby would ever know.
“That’s because you’re going to be the only Aunt my baby will ever know.” Liz said, smiling. “I mean, I don’t have any sisters, Kyle doesn’t have any sisters. It’s all on you.”
- - -
“Hey Kyle.” Liz said as she opened the front door and stepped aside, making a sweeping motion with her hand. “Hi Sheriff.”
Tonight was the night. Her mother had been asking her for weeks when she was going to tell her dad about her bun cooking in the oven. Kyle had said that he would like to be there, because it was his mistake too, and he was bringing along his dad. Just incase Jeff got a little crazy someone could stop him from strangling Kyle.
“Jim, Kyle, good to see the both of you again.” Jeff said entering the living room and walking over extending his hand to Jim and hugging Kyle.
Sitting down to dinner, Jeff eyed both a nervous looking Liz and a fearful looking Kyle. “So what’s this dinner about? Are you two love birds getting back together?”
“Um, not exactly daddy. Kyle and I have something to tell you.” Liz hesitantly told her father. Looking at her mom for encouragement Liz closed her eyes and told her father. “I’m pregnant.”
It was silent for a good five minutes before Jeff’s throaty chuckle filled the room. “I’m sorry, I must have hallucinated just now. Because I think that my virgin daughter just told me she’s pregnant.”
Not a good sign. Nancy thought to herself looking at her husband, straight faced. Looking around the table Jeff’s laughter quickly died out. Looking directly at Kyle, Jeff’s expression turned stony. “My daughter is still a virgin, right Kyle?”
If it wasn’t for the seriousness of the situation, Liz would have laughed at Kyle’s expression. It vaguely reminded her of a deer caught in head lights. Kyle cleared his throat. “No. Sir.”
As Jeff turned to Jim, he saw no shock on the man’s face. No anger. “You knew about this?!” When Jim nodded his head, Jeff turned to his wife’s relaxed face. “You too?!” He stood up quickly from the table and Kyle gripped the sides of his chair firmly, his knuckles turning white.
“We didn’t mean for it to happen, Mr. Parker, sir. We were safe.” Kyle said before he could stop himself. “I used a condom with Liz, every single time.”
“More than once?! The two of you had sex more than once?!” Jeff yelled, his voice bouncing off the walls of the small kitchen, making it sound louder than it really was. “I can’t believe this!”
“Mr. Parker, sir, you must’ve known. I mean we have been since junior year...you almost walked I-”
“Oh god Kyle, just shut up!” Liz yelled, cradling her head in her hands. “You’re just making it worse, just stop talking! Please!”
“Yes Kyle. I think that’ll be enough out of you right now son.” Jim said, patting his son’s tense shoulder.
“Daddy, look. Ok it happened, there’s nothing we can do about it now, I’m not having an abortion and I’m keeping it. We’ve already made up our minds. We’re not getting married and when Kyle leaves for Michigan after graduation, I’m going to.”
She jumped when her father and her mother both shouted, “WHAT?!”
“Maria and I are going to Michigan. We’re gonna get an apartment near campus, jobs to support ourselves. I’ve already made up my mind.” Liz said, leaving no room for discussion. “Kyle wants to be a part of the baby’s life and he can’t do that if I’m in Roswell and he’s in Michigan.”
- - -
A good one hour later, after Jeff had calmed down and started to lecture them, and then broke down and cried excusing himself and going back to the bedroom he shared with his wife, Liz showed Jim and Kyle to the door, thanking them for a lovely evening.
Standing outside her mom and dad’s bedroom, Liz waited for her mom to emerge.
Flashing Liz a tight, forced smile as she emerged from the room, Nancy closed the door behind her. “He needs some time honey. I think he’s more hurt that nobody told him before now than anything else. He’s mad at me, he’s mad at you, he claims to hate both Valenti men. They’re both banned from the Crashdown as of tonight. I think your dad feels betrayed.”
“I know sweetpea, you didn’t mean to hurt his feelings, but some things just can’t be helped.” Nancy said, bringing her daughter into her arms and hugging her. “You’ve had a long day. You should probably go to bed sweetie.”
Turning around feeling upset and disappointed in herself, Liz mumbled a good night and entered her room.
|posted on 30-Dec-2001 7:41:43 AM by sugarplum17|
|Almost. Patience people, patience. It's only January (in the story), they can't graduate yet! |
I still have some things to get out of the way in Roswell before we're off to Michigan.
|posted on 1-Jan-2002 12:28:44 PM by sugarplum17|
|Thanks for all the wonderful fb! I wanted to come and say this last night but I didn't have time to do it before I went out. Anyway, Happy New Year!|
I hope everyone safely rung in the New Year, and that you guys had a whole lot of fun doing it!
|posted on 22-Jan-2002 1:23:38 PM by sugarplum17|
|Apparently these posts were lost as well. I don't remember how many parts I had after 6. I think it might've been just one, but I'm not sure if I saved it. |
|posted on 26-Jan-2002 11:31:12 PM by sugarplum17|
|So I went on this mad/crazy search for missing part(s) after I stopped screaming and jumping up and down like a little girl. I'm incredibly honored that you like this/think highly of the writing Kath!|
The bad news is, I'm incredibly stupid and didn't save. I know, you're thinking, "Ugh, what's your problem?! You didn't save?!" But you know, I honestly never thought something like lost postage would happen. I thought, "No need to save, the board will always be there."
The good news is I think I can remember what part 7 was about. The downside to that is it probably won't be as good as the original. I'm trying to be optimistic though, thinking that I may still have the rough draft that I wrote out by hand.
|posted on 4-Feb-2002 2:30:15 PM by sugarplum17|
|So real life is really jacking me up right about now. I'm stressed and having a really nasty case of writer's block. Words are really not flowing to well right now. So I'm going to be taking a little break from writing. I'll be around the boards reading, I just won't be writing.|
I don't know when I'll start writing again and I don't know if I'll be able to finish this fic when I do, but I'll definitely try to. Sorry everyone.
|posted on 10-Feb-2002 12:04:43 AM by sugarplum17|
|AN: So I guess my little break is over. I never found that paper, and I ended up rewriting the whole thing. I guess it’s as good as the original was, I don’t know.|
Nancy Parker sat at her kitchen table watching the interaction, or lack thereof, between her husband and her daughter. It’d been two weeks since Liz had told Jeff, and everything since had been strained. Nancy watched as Liz quickly glanced from her plate to her father every now and then, and as Jeff kept his eyes on his plate as he ate his food.
Pushing her chair back she angrily picked up her plate and set it down with a loud clank on the counter before she turned around to watch them some more. It’d been going on too damn long. Jeff had practically been ignoring Liz ever since that fateful day in the very same kitchen. There were moments when Nancy thought he would stop acting up, moments when he would enter the living room and stare at Liz for a few moments. But he always either turned around or continued on his way toward the kitchen without so much as another glance in her direction or acknowledging her presence. And as Jeff got up from the table and put his plate in the sink before leaving the room, all without so much as glancing in Liz’s general direction, she silently vowed to herself that it was going to stop. As her daughter’s shoulders slumped in defeat and as she stabbed at her food with her fork, Nancy silently told herself that she was going to put an end to it if it was the last thing she did.
“Sweetie, why don’t you go and visit Maria or something?” Nancy suggested from where she was leaning against the counter. “You look like you need to get out of this house.”
She watched as Liz looked down at her plate. “I’ll save it for you sweetpea. You can heat it up in the microwave or something when you get hungry.”
“Thanks mom.” Liz sighed with relief and dropped her fork onto her plate and pushed herself up from the table. Giving her mom a quick hug she grabbed her coat from the coat rack and left the apartment.
- - -
After doing up the dishes, Nancy went in search of her husband and found him standing on Liz’s balcony, his head tipped up as he looked at the sky. Resting her palms on the window seal, she leaned out. “What are you doing out here?”
He jumped slightly, looking back at his wife. “Nothing.”
She climbed out of the window as carefully as she could, some how, it wasn’t as easy as it used to be. Wrapping her arms around herself she walked over to where her husband stood and sat on the ledge.
“Remember when I used to sit out here with Lizzie?” He asked wistfully as he looked up at the stars again.
“Yeah.” Nancy said, smiling at the memory. “You two used to disappear out here for hours. I would watch from her doorway sometimes. You two would just lay on her lawn chair and point up at the sky, talking quietly. Sometimes I got a little jealous.”
“You could’ve joined us you know.” He said as he turned his head to look at her.
“I know.” She said, waving him off. “It was a father/daughter thing. It wouldn’t have been the same.”
A short silence fell over them before he returned his eyes to the sky and spoke. “I wish we could go back to when she was our little girl.”
Nancy reached out to loosely hold his hand, rubbing her thumb along the back of it. “I do too, Jeff. But we can’t. She has to grow up now.”
“I know that.” He said as he brought his free hand up to rub his forehead. “But does she have to do it so soon?”
She sighed and looked up at the sky before returning her eyes to his face. “I know it’s earlier than we would’ve liked Jeff, but you know how life is sometimes. Believe me, I don’t want my sweetpea to grow up either, but she is and we have to let her.”
“I know...it just hurts Nancy.” He said as he moved to sit down next to her on the ledge. “It hurts that she felt like she couldn’t come to me about this. It hurts to know that she felt like she could talk to everyone but me about it. But what hurts the most is that...we’re losing her.”
“Oh Jeff, we were gonna lose her anyway.” Nancy said tearfully. “The only difference is that now it’s to Michigan instead of Boston.”
Another short silence fell over them and Nancy found herself in her husband’s embrace, his hand gently rubbing her back.
“I hate this too.” She said quietly into his chest. “I hate that my baby is having a baby. It’s too soon, but it’s happening Jeff and the only thing we can do is accept it with open and loving arms. Because if we don’t, we’re gonna lose her for real. These are her last months with us, we should make them the very best that they can possibly be.”
He sighed as he listened to her talk. She was right. And in the corner of his mind, the rational part, he knew that he couldn’t blame her for not telling him sooner. He had reacted badly. His daughter had been planning her trip to Harvard ever since she was ten, it had to be hard. He knew he had to move past his own selfish pride, his wounded ego, and make better what he had made wrong between them. He knew he had to let her know that he still loved her, and that he would love her child as well.
“Talk to her Jeff.” She said as she tipped her head back to look into his sad face. “Please.”
He kissed her forehead before nodding his head. He would talk to her. He wasn’t about to lose his baby. Because he realized that no matter how old she was, his baby was what she was always going to be. It didn’t matter how far away from him she got, or how many husbands and kids she had, he gave her life. She was his only child, and she would always be his little girl.
|posted on 10-Feb-2002 2:23:15 PM by sugarplum17|
|LOL yes Araxie it's on to uncharted territory, still not Michigan, but a part you've never read before. Oh and I was having a nasty block and some medical problems, so that's why I was MIA for a while with all my fics.|
Thanks for the feedback guys.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 10-Feb-2002 2:25:25 PM ]
|posted on 19-Feb-2002 10:02:01 AM by sugarplum17|
|AN: We’re still not off to Michigan. I just want to get one more thing out of the way and then we’ll be packin up the Jetta and heading off.|
Liz sighed as she entered her home. Quietly, so not to wake her father, she slipped off her coat and hung it up before slipping off her shoes. Any other time Liz would’ve thought it odd that her father had fallen asleep on the couch and her mother hadn’t woken him up to tell him to go to bed. However, considering everything that had been happening, it definitely wasn’t odd now. He’d been sleeping on the couch most nights since he found out. Her mother had been very upset with him on more than one occasion.
As quietly as she could, she walked over to where her father slept on the couch and gently took the remote out of his hand. Pointing it at the tv, she pressed the button and the flickering pictures of the infomercial that he’d fallen asleep watching turned instantly to black.
She bent down to sit the remote on the coffee table, and kissed her father’s forehead. No matter what she still loved her father. Even if he’d been ignoring her for close to two weeks.
In the dim light that filtered in from the street light near the window, she made her way across the living room and down the hall, flicking on her bedroom light and quietly shutting the door behind her. She quickly changed into her pajamas and went into the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth. When she emerged from the tiny bathroom, she found her bedroom door ajar and her dad climbing through the window.
“Daddy?” She asked as she leaned out the window. “What are you doing?”
“Come out here Lizzie.” He told her as he sat down on the lawn chair. “We need to talk.”
The puzzled expression she wore quickly faded away to a worried one as she went to her closet to retrieve her robe before climbing out of the window and sitting in the lawn chair that sat next to the one her father lounged in. “What is it?”
“It’s about this whole...situation.” He said solemnly. “I’m not happy about this Liz.”
She looked down at the floor of the roof. “I know.”
“I’m just...I’m so disappointed Lizzie.” He told her as he shook his head before looking down at the ground. “You were gonna get out of here, and you were gonna do great things honey. You’ve been dreaming about Harvard for as long as I can remember and it just...disappoints me...that you’re not going to be able to go there and do those great things.”
Her throat constricted. She tried swallowing to lessen the tightness of her throat but found that it did nothing.
“And I thought we could talk to each other Liz?” He asked her, looking in the opposite direction. “I thought that you and me were close. That you could tell me anything.”
“I ju-” She cleared her throat and looked away from the floor, away from her dad. “I just didn’t want you to be disappointed daddy. I didn’t want to look at you and see you looking back at me, the way that you’ve been lately.”
There was an awkward silence before she spoke again in a shaky voice. “My reflection, the one that I see when I look into your eyes, or mom’s eyes, it’s just like this perfect version of me. It’s always been this like, untarnished version, and I just...I guess I wanted to keep it that way.”
Jeffery Parker had never thought himself an ass until that moment, because that was the first time in his life that he truly ever felt like one.
“I felt like I was losing you, when everyone already knew and I was left out of the loop.” He told her, honestly. “I still do. My baby is having a baby. How am I supposed to deal with that?”
She shrugged her shoulders before looking up into the sky. Her mind flashed back to the last time she’d been looking up into the sky while sitting next to her father. Definitely a happier time. A time when she was innocent. A time when she was still perfect.
“Your mom says the only way I can deal with it is to accept it.” He told her as he pushed himself out of his chair. “She says that if I don’t accept it, I’ll lose you for real. And I don’t know, I guess maybe she’s right.”
Liz’s head whipped around in her father’s direction.
“I mean, when you’re in Michigan it’ll just be physical distance that separates us but I don’t think I could live with myself if it was emotional distance too.” He said as he stopped pacing and looked up at the sky. “Sure is pretty tonight.”
Her head tipped backward as she looked up at the sky. “Yeah, it is.”
She stood up and went to her father’s side, wanting to cry when he enveloped her in his arms as he looked up at the sky. “I’m disappointed that you’ve let this happen. But I know that you’ll make me proud again. You’ll be a great mom, even if it’s too soon for you to be one.”
“Thanks daddy.” She told him sincerely as a tear trickled down her cheek. How had she gotten so lucky? Some girls were thrown out on the streets when their father’s found out they’d gotten pregnant. Some parents didn’t accept the baby with open and loving arms. But Jeff and Nancy weren’t just some parents. They were her parents. And she thanked her lucky stars for it.
|posted on 20-Feb-2002 6:54:24 AM by sugarplum17|
|Thanks for the feedback everyone!|
I'm glad you all liked this part so much. And thanks Thaea.
|posted on 22-Feb-2002 11:36:26 AM by sugarplum17|
|AN: I don’t know how happy I am with this part but I wanted some of the kids at school to not be so accepting about the whole situation. So I made up some bitchy valley girls. This will probably be their only appearance in this fic. Maybe.|
A number of thoughts were running rampant through Liz’s head. She wondered if she had crumbs on her upper lip from the piece of toast she ate for breakfast. Or if she had something in her hair, maybe something between her teeth. She was sort of feeling like an outcast. Putting on her best smile she walked up to the group of girls she called her friends and greeted them as she normally would.
“Hey ladies.” She said, showing her pearly whites. “What’s going on?”
They looked at each other sharing a strange look and then back to Liz before Tawny Miller stepped forward. “Is it true? You know, that you’re pregnant with Kyle Valenti’s love child?”
“Um...yeah...I guess.” Liz told them, completely unaware that she held in her breath afterwards, anticipating their reactions.
“Oh my god Lizzie that’s so cute! You’re gonna be a mom and we can all go shopping for cute baby things!” Amanda Becker squealed as she clutched her books to her chest, her face scrunched up in an excited expression.
“Um Amanda. No.” Harmony Thompson. A real bitch, the leader of the pack too. It took Harmony forever to warm up to Liz when she and Kyle first started dating. “Have we all forgotten that Jeni is going out with Kyle?”
Amanda’s excited expression fell as she turned around to look at Jeni. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry.”
Jeni Kozman rolled her eyes and flipped her long brown hair over her shoulder. “Whatever. The point here is, that I feel like totally betrayed by you Liz.”
“Jeni, I got pregnant before you and Kyle started going out. He was with me at the time, so how do you feel betrayed?” Liz asked, the confusion evident in her voice.
“You’re like, trying to trap her man into staying with you. Everyone knows that.” Harmony’s disdain for Liz was dripping all over the place in the tone of her voice. “Everyone knows that you didn’t want to let him go. And we don’t like that you’re trying to steal her boyfriend.”
Liz was about to respond when she felt an arm wrap around her shoulders and heard a voice she never thought would ever come to her defense. “I bet Liz didn’t like it when you tried to get with Kyle at my party Harm.”
Harmony eyed Liz’s defender with disgust. “I don’t remember asking for your opinion on the matter skank.”
“Waiting till he was too drunk to tie his own shoe and then pulling him into my bedroom? Hmm, sounds like one hell of a crappy plan, don’t you think Liz?” She asked, turning her head toward Liz and winking when she caught Liz’s surprised look. “Yes, it does seem like a pretty skanky thing to do. Too bad I spoiled her fun when I walked in on her warped version of a seduction.”
“Whatever.” Harmony eyed them both, the hatred pouring off of her in waves, before turning around and starting to walk away.
“We don’t associate with you anymore Liz.” Harmony said over her shoulder. “You’re dead to us. You and that loser little friend of yours. Maria something or other.”
“That’s Deluca, bitch.”
“Neat. Come on girls, lets get away from these stupid cunts.” And with that Harmony walked down the hall, her head held high.
“Yeah run along you worthless little puppets. Follow the master’s command.” Pam called out after them. Scoffing when one of them turned around to give her the finger and when Amanda turned around to offer an apologetic look.
Turning to her defender, she took in the girl’s appearance. Her long blonde hair was hanging down her back, curled at the ends. Today she was dressed as a Goth, make-up, jewelry and all. She hadn’t personally been a bitch to Pam Troy, but all her so-called friends had been, and Liz had thought that Pam hated her by association. Due to the fact that occasionally Liz had laughed at something one of her “friends” had said, or done.
“Uh, thanks Pam.” She sounded so surprised that Pam couldn’t help but laugh.
“It’s no problem Parker.” Pam told her, lightly punching her shoulder. “Better get to class.”
Liz stood there, dumbfounded as Pam walked off down the hall, openly glaring at a few people here and there. She kept wondering what in the world had gone on. It was like she was living in an alternate universe. Her friends weren’t speaking to her, no she was “dead to them” and Pam Troy, a person whom she had thought hated her, was sticking up for her.
“What the hell was that?” Maria asked, coming up to Liz’s side. “That was totally a twilight zone experience that I watched from across the hall.”
“Yeah, it felt like a twilight zone experience.” Liz told her quietly, staring off into the direction Pam had disappeared into and clutching her books to her chest. “That was extremely weird.”
“Are you okay?” Maria asked, looping her arm through Liz’s and giving her a worried expression. “I was just about to come over here and say something to those worthless little bitches but Pam, for whatever reason, beat me to it.”
“Yeah I’m fine.” Liz told her as they began walking, offering up a small smile in Maria’s direction. “What about you? We’re no longer basking in the limelight of popularity anymore...I’m really sorry about that.”
“Oh it’s fine Lizzie. The only person I really even cared about in that group of friends was you.” Maria smiled as she momentarily leaned her head against Liz’s. “Popularity never really appealed to me much.”
They walked down the hall silently, listening to the sounds of people gossiping and getting things out of their lockers, for a little while before Maria turned her head toward Liz. “What do you think they’ll do to Kyle?”
She looked thoughtful for a couple of seconds before shrugging her shoulders.
TBC - Hated it? Loved it? You were completely indifferent? Let me know please.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 22-Feb-2002 11:38:07 AM ]
|posted on 28-Feb-2002 2:13:38 PM by sugarplum17|
|Lillie - Yup, I was listening to the Alien Ant Farm CD when I decided to rewrite the story and make it different from it's original version. It was actually Flesh and Bone that inspired me to do it, for whatever weird reason. So I just used the title of the song as the title of my fic.|
As for a new part, I should have one out by this weekened or at the latest, early next week. I'd say by Monday or Tuesday at the latest. Thank you for all the wonderful feedback everyone! It's greatly appreciated!
I have to start working on my other ones. Like Welcome to Mystic and That One Night. Feels like those two haven't been updated in forever.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 28-Feb-2002 2:19:23 PM ]
|posted on 17-Mar-2002 12:53:49 PM by sugarplum17|
quote: Wow, sorry I lied. I really didn't mean to. Anyways, I'm going to start working on a new part right after I finish posting this.
sugarplum17 originally wrote:
As for a new part, I should have one out by this weekened or at the latest, early next week. I'd say by Monday or Tuesday at the latest.
Aww, thanks AudioPoet! There's this one, and I know I saw you on Welcome to Mystic and Breakaway, could the other one be the mob fic?
|posted on 17-Mar-2002 1:38:42 PM by sugarplum17|
The pregnancy. Would you, the readers, prefer to speed through it? Or would you rather me take you through it?
Personally, I would rather speed through it. I've never been pregnant before, and I haven't really been around a lot of pregnant women either, so it would be kind of difficult for me to take you through it. But if that's what you guys want, I'll give it a go and challenge myself.
Oh and the faster we get that out of the way, the faster we get to Michigan.
|posted on 17-Mar-2002 9:28:02 PM by sugarplum17|
|Alright, speed through it is. Just want to warn you though, there probably won't be any nc-17...|
|posted on 18-Mar-2002 11:28:33 PM by sugarplum17|
|I'm really having a hell of a time writing this next part. I'm really getting frustrated with myself. So I think what I'm going to do is, I'm going to take a small break. In about a day or two, I'm gonna come back and try again. Hopefully I'll be able to write something that isn't complete crap. (I won't be updating any of my other fics until I get this one updated first. It's my top priority right now.)|
|posted on 19-Mar-2002 9:07:14 PM by sugarplum17|
|AN: Man, writing this part nearly killed me. It's a really sucky part, in my opinion. Feel free to let me know if you think differently or if your opinion is the same. In the next part, I'm going to skip ahead again, and the baby will be born. Then in the part after that, we should be off to Michigan!|
Five months later Liz found herself seated at a nicely decorated card table that had been set up in the Deluca’s backyard. Her mother, Amy and Maria had planned a surprise baby shower for her, which had indeed taken her by surprise. She had been surprised that they had been able to plan it without making her suspicious and surprised that Maria hadn’t spilled the beans. Maria had admitted to almost spilling them a few times, but she had kept herself in check, surprising everyone.
They had invited everyone that Liz loved, and even a few people that she didn’t love. Her Grandpa and Grandma Jensen, Nancy’s parents, came down from North Carolina to see their granddaughter. They had moved away shortly after Liz had been born, and as a result, Liz had never grown close to them. They congratulated her on graduating at the top of her class, even in her precarious situation. They’d given her a stroller, some money and a card before going back to their hotel.
Maria had invited her cousin Sean, his girlfriend Sharon and their four-year-old daughter Minnie. Liz was glad to see them there. Sharon was someone who knew exactly what Liz was going through, and would be going through. Sean, who at the time was nineteen, had gotten Sharon pregnant at the tender age of sixteen. It had seemed so wrong to her back then, but Liz was beginning to understand. It just happened, no matter how safe you thought you were being, it happened. She should have abstained from sex, until she was ready for the consequences, she knew that now. But it was already too late.
- - -
“You’ll never get another decent night of sleep.” Sharon had told her, while she cut Minnie’s hot dog into little sections. “Oh sure, you’ll get a night here or there. But if it’s not the diapers or an empty stomach while they're babies, it’s the boogy man and bad dreams when they’re older.”
“You and Sean must really love each other.” Liz commented as she observed the tiny diamond engagement ring on Sharon’s finger.
Sharon looked down at the ring and smiled. “It’s not real you know. The ring I mean.” She looked wistfully in the direction where Sean and Kyle were fiddling with the grill.
“He’s not like other guys Liz. He was so sweet when he found out, he proposed to me right then and there. But I was only sixteen, I didn’t want to be divorced by the time I was 18, so I said no. He kept asking, and I kept saying no. Till one day he pointed out that Minnie was four, and we were still living together, and still in love. He asked again, and this time...well, I guess you know what my answer was."
“That’s sweet.” Liz told her genuinely as she propped her elbow up on the table, her free hand gently rubbing small circles over her small bulging stomach.
“So what about you and Kyle?” Sharon asked as she sat back and looked at Liz, gently slapping her elbow.
Liz sighed. “It’s been over for a while now. It was over even before I found out I was pregnant.”
“Think you guys’ll get back together?” Sharon asked, propping her elbow on the table as well. Liz shook her head. It wasn’t very likely. She didn’t really want him anymore, at least not in that way. And she was sure that Kyle didn’t want her either. “Well, don’t you worry Liz. Some day a man is gonna come along and he’s gonna sweep you right off your feet. He’s gonna love your baby just as much as his own. I promise.”
It was doubtful, but Liz smiled anyway.
- - -
Pam Troy had also shown up at the party. She’d bought Liz’s baby a few toys and wrapped them in pretty wrapping paper. It had surprised Liz that Maria would think to invite Pam. She never had gotten the chance to ask Pam why she stuck up for her that day in the hallway, but it looked as though the perfect opportunity was presenting itself.
“Hey Parker.” Pam said as she gently set the wrapped presents onto the present table. “How ya feelin?”
“Hi Pam, thanks for coming.” Liz smiled warmly at the blonde infront of her.
Pam stood infront of Liz, with her hands on her hips, studying the girl before her. “God, for five months pregnant, you sure don’t look it.”
It was true. Liz had hardly gained any weight anywhere except for her stomach and her breasts. She was no bigger than a small basketball, and her doctor was predicting she wouldn’t get much bigger. The only thing that reassured her was the fact that the ultrasounds were showing that everything was progressing fine. There were no complications and her child was perfectly fine.
They sat and chatted with each other, Pam was introduced to her mother and father, and finally as the party was winding down to a finish Liz asked the question that she had been burning to ask.
“Um, Pam?” She started hesitantly. She had no clue why she was so nervous. “Why did you...stick up for me, you know, that day in the hall?”
Pam sighed and wrapped her arm around Liz’s shoulders as they walked side by side to the gate. “Parker, I don’t know if you remember this or not, but in eighth grade I was friends with those girls too. I got my boobs in eight grade, and they were all still kind of flat, so of course I was getting all the attention from the boys.” She laughed at the memory. “Harmony liked this guy, but she never told anyone, and I ended up making out with him at her party. They all turned on me faster than you can say bitch, and thus my reputation as a slut was created.”
“Wow, so you really never did any of the things I heard about?” Liz turned her head to look at Pam’s face. She was smiling.
“Oh no, I did those things Parker.” Pam said with a satisfied smile. “I figured, as long as there were lies going around about me, I might as well start making some of them true. The only thing you’ve heard, in recent years, that isn’t true is what they said about that night at my party. About how I was trying to seduce Kyle. As you now know, that was all Harmony.”
Liz turned toward Pam and hugged her, smiling when the blonde awkwardly hugged her back. “Hey kid, let’s not get all emotional on me now.”
“Thanks Pam.” Liz said as she released the other girl.
- - -
Kyle had come to the party as well, bringing with him his dad and his grandpa. They had taken Jim Sr., out of the retirement home so that he could meet the mother of his future great-grandchild. For most of the day, Jim Sr., sat in a lawn chair and staring off into space. Physically, he was there. But his mind was somewhere else entirely. Kyle had told her once, that his grandfather had checked out of their reality a long time ago. But she smiled and thanked him for the quilt that Jim claimed was a gift from his father. He told Liz that it had been made by his father’s mother, a very long time ago. She kissed Kyle on the cheek and thanked him for the white roses that he brought her. She hugged Jim and thanked him for the beautiful antique bassinet.
Her mother had invited her Aunt Thelma from Florida. They talked whenever Thelma wasn’t busy helping the women in the kitchen, and arguing with Nancy, her sister. Thelma told Liz that everyone she knew down in Florida had sent a gift. Thelma’s husband, Eugene had sent a beautiful hand carved crib. Her cousins, Sherrie and Olivia had each sent her baby clothes. Two outfits in two different colors. The friends she had made from staying down there, had sent her cards and stuffed animals.
Finally, at 8:00 the last person backed out of the driveway. Liz wearily climbed the stairs of the porch and entered the house. She sank down into a chair at the kitchen table and watched as the women in the kitchen, her mother, Amy and Maria, cleaned the dishes. She craned her neck to look into the living room where Jim, Kyle and her father were resting on the couch, as if they had been doing more all day than sitting around, drinking beer or in Kyle’s case, pop, and discussing sports.
She smiled to herself as she looked down at the checkered table cloth. It had been a wonderful party, small and intimate, but definitely wonderful. Her smile grew slightly bigger as she rested her hand on her stomach. Pushing herself up, she walked over to where Maria was putting dishes into the cupboard and pulled her into a hug. She motioned for Nancy and Amy to join the hug and before she knew it, she was crying on Maria’s shoulder, in the midst of a group hug and thanking three wonderful women for a wonderful party and apologizing for being so overly emotional.
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 19-Mar-2002 9:14:24 PM ]
|posted on 20-Apr-2002 11:23:29 PM by sugarplum17|
|Don't worry, I'm here! I haven't forgotten this one, and I promise that I won't. |
|posted on 3-May-2002 2:04:50 AM by sugarplum17|
Gold star to you BelevnDreamsToo! For not only bumping this three times but bumping almost ALL of my fics in one day. I did notice that.
Anyway, I've decided that this one needs another part. And then once this has been updated, the next fic on my list is Welcome to Mystic. After that it's on to In the Light of Darkness then Heatwave after that Breakaway and finally back to I Am, which was updated on the 30th of April.
I'm getting my act together people. And I'm going to start updating these as regularly as life and time permit.
|posted on 3-May-2002 4:16:40 AM by sugarplum17|
|I kind of used my own birth story for this, as told to me by my mother. Of course things have been changed around to fit the story and what not. Italics are someone's thoughts.|
Liz shuffled across the floor, carefully carrying the heavy tray in her hands and setting it down on the table top. “Okay, I have one Sigourney Weaver and one Will Smith.” She said as she set the plates down infront of the customers before placing her tray under her arm and shuffling away.
She’d been dropping off orders like that all day, not really stopping to care if the customers needed or wanted anything else, or even if she had set the plates down at the wrong table or infront of the wrong people. Her swollen feet were killing her, and throughout the day she found herself leaning against something stationary and pressing a hand into the small of her aching lower back. The pregnancy had really been kicking her ass lately.
Everyone had been telling her to stop working and to stay upstairs, off her feet, and rest. But Liz insisted. She had to earn a living, and besides, she would go stir crazy up there with her feet propped up on a pillow watching those ridiculous soap operas! Half her duties were already taken away and given to Maria. No longer was she doing the inventory, or restocking the shelves.
No longer was the title of Assistant Manager on Liz’s name tag. Now it was on Maria’s! She felt extremely betrayed by her father’s decision to demote her. Even though, she knew he was doing it in her best interests. Rationally, she knew that she shouldn’t be climbing the step ladder to stock the shelves. But she didn’t see why she couldn’t do the inventory.
“Jose!” Liz yelled as she came to a stop infront of the service window. “Where’s the order for table six? They’re waiting!”
The fry cook behind the window, didn’t even bother turning around to look at her as he raised his middle finger into the air. The first time she had bitten his head off like that, he had gotten offended and slightly scared. Liz had never in her life raised her voice to him, or anyone really. At least not in his presence. And he really didn’t know what to say or think about it. He had been caught off guard. But by her seventh month, he was used to it.
Maria sat Indian style in the middle of the floor in the stock room. With her lime green plastic clip board in hand and her brow furrowed in concentration, she diligently worked on the inventory. She hated inventory. It was all about organization and order. Those were two of Liz’s passions. However, they were Maria’s arch nemesis. She was the most unorganized person that she knew!
Unfortunately, it was her responsibility to do it now that she was the assistant manager. It required climbing up on the ladder anyway, and she definitely didn’t want Liz doing that! Nobody wanted Liz doing that. Because that was dangerous for Liz in her condition, and even more dangerous for Liz’s unborn child.
Maria’s ears perked up at the sound of muffled yelling coming from the front room. “Jose!” She recognized the voice immediately and shook her head before looking back at the papers that were secured to the clip board.
Humming a song that she had written the other night, Maria let her mind wander from the stock to dreams of being famous. A lot of famous people have come from Michigan... She thought to herself, as her eyes became unfocused and the words on the page she was staring at blurred. Madonna was from Michigan.
Shutting her eyes she envisioned standing on stage infront of a huge audience. Microphone in hand and a band behind her. Killer leather pants hugging her hips, a black tank top with maybe some rhinestones or glitter on it to catch the light, and of course hair and make up like the stars.
She played her fantasy out inside of her head, behind her closed eyes for a little while longer before switching to another one. A strange fantasy that she’d never had before. One with a dog playing in the front yard fenced in by a white picket fence, flowers lining the cement that lead to the porch. A cozy looking white house with shutters. Two barefoot kids running around the house, from the back yard to the front, as if they didn’t have a care in the world. And there on the porch, standing in the open doorway was Maria looking like Donna Reid!
Laughing out loud in the empty stock room, she opened her eyes. “I kill myself sometimes.” She told herself light-heartedly. “Me being little Miss Domestic? I think not!”
Focusing her eyes on the paper once more, she started the heinous task of taking inventory. It was seconds later that she heard the breaking of a plate and a shrill scream from the main dining room.
In an instant, Maria was up and on her feet. Racing through the door of the stock room, through the back room, and through the swinging door that lead to the main dining area. Where she immediately stopped in her tracks.
Liz was slightly bent over, and holding the bulge of her stomach, standing in a puddle of something nasty. “Oh my god! Oh my god! Think Maria, think!”
“Okay, Liz.” Maria rushed to her best friend’s side, putting a hand on her shoulder and a hand on her back. “Okay, come on. You need to sit down.”
Once she maneuvered Liz into the closest chair, which a customer had immediately vacated after seeing that he was the closest to the young girl, she frantically wrung her hands. She knew this was coming. Well, she didn’t really. It wasn’t supposed to happen quite so soon. But she had still known that this would happen when the baby was ready. Under normal circumstances, Maria would have been in control of the situation completely. However, this wasn’t a normal circumstance. This baby was coming early, before it was supposed to.
“Mr. P!” Maria yelled as she turned around and ran through the swinging door and toward the stairs to the apartment. “Mr. Parker!”
Six hours later, five anxious people found themselves either sitting in a chair and fidgeting or pacing the small waiting room of the maternity ward. Jim sat beside Amy, distractedly leafing through a Parenthood magazine and bouncing his knee up and down in a nervous gesture. Amy sat next to him glancing sideways to look at her daughter every few seconds while nervously wringing her hands.
Maria sat slumped in her chair, wrapping a curl around her finger, staring at nothing in particular. All the waiting was making her crazy, but she wasn’t going to crack under the pressure. She wasn’t going to cry either. Healthy babies came one month early all the time, right?
Jeff and Nancy stood, pacing in opposite directions, each one lost in their own worries and thoughts. It seemed like only yesterday Nancy was pushing Liz out of her body, and to think that their daughter, their baby, was now pushing a life out of hers? It blew their minds. Nancy wondered briefly what the baby’s sex was going to be before silently telling herself to shut up. It didn’t matter that Liz and Kyle had decided to be surprised, all that really mattered was that her baby was safe! And her grandchild as well.
That was when it hit her, for the very first time. So hard that it made her fall back into a chair. Grandma! She was going to be a Grandma! Something she felt entirely too young to be! Grandmothers were supposed to be wrinkly with gray hair. Okay so she had a few around the eyes and one or two laugh lines near her mouth, and sure, she had noticed a few gray hairs growing into her auburn hair. But she wasn’t anywhere near grandma age yet!
An hour later, Kyle emerged from the delivering room wearing a weary smile and a pair of green scrubs. His face mask that they had made him wear hung around his neck.
“How are they?” Nancy asked anxiously as she bolted up from her seat. “How’s my baby girl?”
“Which one?” Kyle asked, his smile growing bigger smile. “Liz or Kaeli?”
A girl! Nancy and Jeff had both been expecting a boy!
“Yes!” Maria shouted, jumping up from her chair. “A girl! I knew it!”
“Are they okay? Can we see them?” Jeff asked worriedly. His mind hadn’t yet wrapped itself around Kyle’s information. He would process and celebrate that later. He had worked himself up thinking of the worst possible case scenarios, and all he wanted was to be proven wrong.
“Mother and daughter, are doing fine.” Kyle assured them. “Liz is in her room and Kaeli is fully developed. They’re having trouble keeping her temperature stable though.”
At their worried looks, Kyle raised his hands. “It’s nothing serious. She’s in an incubator. The doctor said it could stabilize anywhere from tonight to tomorrow night.”
“Could?” Maria asked him, wrapping her arms around herself. “Meaning it also could not?”
“Dr. Lucas said that there’s a good chance that it will.” Kyle told her earnestly. “She said that Kaeli’s lungs are fully developed and that’s good for a premature baby.”
“Can we see them?” Nancy repeated Jeff’s unanswered question.
“Yeah. Of course.” Kyle said as he stepped out of the doorway. “You’ll have to look at Kaeli through the glass though.”
Kaeli - A varient of Kae or Kayla meaning "keeper of keys"
[ edited 1 time(s), last at 3-May-2002 5:48:15 AM ]
|posted on 3-May-2002 2:00:36 PM by sugarplum17|
rattlebox originally wrote:
* Your version of Jeff is a first class bastard. Cringe. He strikes me as that most corrosive of all parents, the one who puts up a terrific show of being loving and caring while all the while insiduously eating away at his childs feelings of self-worth and lovability. He gives me the willies.
quote:absolutely convinced me that the man was evil. Liz should thank her lucky stars that she'd managed to snag Kyle up? Kyle, while an okay, maybe even great, guy, is a friggin insurance agent waiting to happen. Liz should have been a Nobel prize contender. Jeff might as well have told her she was essentially worthless and her only hope was in finding a good man to take care of her. She should have slugged him the moment the words came out of his mouth.
Kyle Valenti was quite a catch, her father had always said. Liz should thank her lucky stars that she’d managed to snag him up. Was what he had told her, many times. His straight A, book-ish daughter, who in his eyes was quite beautiful, had managed to snag herself a good boy. Even when he’d caught the two in the break room of the Crashdown at two am, heavily making out and Kyle’s hand up his only daughter’s shirt while his other hand had been creeping up her skirt, he’d pretended he hadn’t seen it, and Kyle had done no wrong.
* His reaction to the pregnancy news was a study in hypocrisy. As the passage above shows, he gave tacit approval to their having sex, thereby forgoing any claim to being shocked or disappointed. If he really cared about Liz he would have chased Kyle home and then sat her down and explained that she was playing with fire, that she was playing Russian roulette with her future. But to say nothing? Can you say selfish, not to mention parentally negligent?
* I mourn for what Liz has lost. She may yet do okay: she might manage to struggle through college, she might manage to escape the life-long poverty that claims so many unwed teenaged mothers: she's very fortunate in that, in addition to her parents, she has both Kyle and Maria to support her. Most kids aren't that lucky. She might even, as I suspect she will, given that this is fiction after all, find compelling romantic love. Nonetheless, her life is almost certainly going to be much less than it could have been, actually should have been. It's a tragedy when especially gifted people are never given the chance to realize their talents: it's an enormous loss both to them and to the world. How many Newtons or Mozarts do you suppose God gives us?
*edited to add more flourish, 'cause I just can't help myself.
Alright, well, I'm not exactly sure how to take this. So I'm just going to say thanks for your input.