|posted on 22-Sep-2001 3:50:41 PM by dreamangel|
|Title: Like Father, Like Son|
Disclaimer: The usual, not mine, blah..blah blah...blah.
Summary: Max's son, Bastian, grows up a little too fast...
Note: Um...I started this awhile ago, and I want to finish it befor season three, and I'd like a lot more of a response this time cause it's kinda my brain child and I'm not certain why people aren't really interested. But, anyway, read and tell me what you think.
He wasn't really aware of anything except her voice, her sweet voice, reverberating in his head. She had told him to wake up. How was he to do that?
So now he was here, staring up at the night sky, the billions of twinkling lights surrounding Earth as well as his home. But wasn't Earth his home? He knew he had tried to make it his home, tried to belong, but everything was falling apart, and now he was lost and confused.
He heard another voice, not her voice, but one he was beginning to find comforting. One that often told him about home, one that helped him see home. The place where he had once belonged. Did he belong there now?
"Max?" He turned his head, near tears, and she was there. She was always there, ready to comfort and sympathize. Like Liz used to be.
But she wasn't Liz. In fact, she was the exact opposite of Liz. Maybe that's what he needed now. Maybe...
Maybe she could help him wake up.
The skin to skin contact was odd. How had he ended up naked? How had she ended up naked? Why was the floor so damn hard?
He opened his eyes and smiled, Liz was kissing him. Making love to him. He knew it was Liz, it had to be, he wouldn't be loving anyone but Liz.
She smiled at him, brown eyes sparkling, though for a second he swore they were blue, but no...
"Max..." she cried as her orgasm hit, sending him spiraling after her. He remained in the pleasure shrouded haze for nearly an hour. Was that normal? he wondered as he fell asleep.
He opened his eyes, very, very sore, and looked down. To say he was surprised was an understatement. About the biggest understatement since the forming of the Universe.
Tess. Tess was naked. In his arms. What was Tess doing naked in his arms? That wasn't right, Liz should be with him. Only Liz. Why wasn't she here?
Memory hit like a ton of bricks. Liz was in Sweden, very likely exposing them. He was angry at her, had issued an ultimatum. One that hadn't gone his way. He had tried to make her choose between him and the truth.
She had chose truth.
So he had wound up at the observatory and eventually wound up in Tess. That wasn't right. He had been remembering things from his past, and she had been helping.
He remembered how much he had loved her. How much Zan loved Ava. For a time at least.
He remembered how quickly his infatuation with her had ceased, leaving him stuck in a marriage with a woman he didn't love. He had always been kind to her though, never let her think, even for a moment, that his adoration of her had ended.
She woke suddenly, and said, "Morning." He smiled and nodded, waiting until she was clinging to him again before allowing his face to show actual emotion again.
He didn't want this.
He felt so awkward. He didn't know how to act around Tess anymore. Before he had acted as though she were his friend, and that had become true.
But how was he supposed to act now? She wanted more, expected more. After all, they had just had sex. A step forward would be natural. Right?
So he took her hand. Trying to forget the difference between being her boyfriend and being Liz's. When he had been Liz's, touching her had been as essential as breathing, but touching Tess...It just wasn't that appealing.
Tess was pregnant with his child. That wasn't right either. Nothing about this thing was right. He couldn't conceive a child with someone he didn't love. Weren't there, like, Laws of Nature prohibiting such an act?
But he had been thinking of his love at the time. He had been thinking of Liz, wishing for Liz, as he had sex with Tess. Maybe the whole thing had just manifested itself into a child.
A child that should be he and Liz's.
He loved his son. He did. How could he not? There was a tiny, infinitely precious being that he had helped make. It was a part of him, a better part maybe.
The fault was entirely his own that the boy would have the wrong mother.
Liz. Always his thoughts returned to Liz. She hadn't left. She had stayed, she had been in Roswell while he had been doing what he had been doing with Tess. The thought nauseated him.
He'd yelled at her again. He'd been doing that a lot lately. So much that it didn't seem like it was him. He had hurt her too, grabbed her arm so hard...He hadn't even been conscious of it.
Why was he projecting his self hate toward her? She didn't need that. She had enough to deal with with Alex's death, she didn't need a psychotic stalker too. Especially not one who had betrayed her.
But she had betrayed him, a small voice argued.
He suppressed it instantly. That train of thought only led to more conflict between his heart and head. One arguing what he saw and the other what he knew. He was confused enough. He didn't need that.
What he needed was a focal point. What he needed was a clear truth to concentrate on. And the only reliable thing right now was his son.
He'd focus on keeping him safe.
His son was dying! The thought nearly paralyzed him. When he had seen Tess fall...
He hadn't been concerned for her, he couldn't bring himself to be, but the baby...
And now this...
No. God, please, no! Don't take his son from him. He needed him, like he needed Liz. And if he couldn't have both he needed at least one.
Why was he praying? He didn't believe in God. How could something he didn't believe in help? He didn't know, but he'd take whatever he could get right now. Too much was happening.
Alex translated the book. She had been right, and she hadn't rubbed it in, she just helped. And now they could go home. To a planet they had never seen before except in blurred memories.
He wasn't sure he wanted to go. Before it had seemed like salvation, but now...Liz was in Roswell. Could he leave Liz?
He had too, for his son. Everything had to be for his son now. Even caring for Tess.
They had a month before he was born, and they had to get off the planet before then. He could die if they didn't, and that wasn't an option. His son had to live.
So they were using the information Liz had provided unhesitatingly and using the Granilith and going home. Where he would be King and Tess would be Queen and they would save the planet from Kivar's tyranny and his son would be safe.
He had 24 hours. 24 hours in which to accomplish everything. He had to find a murderer, he had to apologize to Liz, he had to comfort Isabel, say good-bye to his parents, and figure out a way to explain their disappearances.
And he had to tell Liz about he and Tess.
He wanted to die.
He told her. Finally. He had felt so sick, and the look on her face…
The betrayal there.
He knew what his face must have looked like when he had seen her in bed with Kyle.
She hadn't slept with Kyle! The joy he felt soared high, so high, above this tiny world, and then came crashing back down. He couldn't do anything about it now.
Tess was pregnant and he had to leave. He didn't want to go. He wanted to stay and do everything over, make everything up to her. But he couldn't.
He gave her his pendant, the one that meant home, and they said good-bye, and she asked him if he loved her.
"Not like I love you."
Yet another understatement. Tess was carrying his child, but she wasn't Liz. She'd NEVER be Liz. How could he love her? He couldn't ever love her like he loved Liz. Liz was his everything, his sun, his moon, his sky, his earth, his air, his stars, his love, his heart, his soul, his home...
And he was leaving her.
Michael was staying. Good. One of them should follow their heart. Now at least they had someone to protect the others. To protect Liz.
But he was going. He and Isabel and Tess. And his son...
Tess killed Alex.
Tess killed Alex.
Liz had told him, Kyle had backed her up, when only a week ago Kyle had been backing Tess. The memory of that confrontation was like a whip to his back. But Tess had been messing with everyone's heads.
Messing with their lives.
Couldn't she understand that life mattered? Everyone's lives...But no. She was too alien, and she expected him to be like that too. She had actually had the nerve to call Liz a bitch.
His sweet, loving Liz a bitch. He had wanted to kill her then. But life was precious, even hers, and she was his friend, the mother of his child.
She was so quick to point that out, even as she informed him of her betrayal. She was going to deliver his son to Kivar and kill him and his family off.
And she expected him to love her?!
She dared him to kill her. He would have too, but he couldn't risk his son. So he had let her go, taking his son with her.
He had to stay for the chance to save him. He needed to live to save him. He had to stay with Liz, he needed her right now.
She looked at him, and he looked at her, and he told her the truth.
"I've been really wrong about a lot. But I was right about one thing: To get you into my life, to be around you, to love you."
She let him hold her close, like he'd desperately been wanting to do since last summer when she'd run from him. He'd fix things now.
He was finally beginning to wake up.
"What happens now, Max?"
"I have to save my son..."
Pretty please send FB.
Edited by - dreamangel on 09/23/2001 18:11:56
Edited by - dreamangel on 09/24/2001 18:11:28
|posted on 23-Sep-2001 6:10:18 PM by dreamangel|
This wasn’t anything like she’d expected it to be. The planet was beautiful, just like she’d remembered it. She’d visited the lake yesterday. She had sat on the out cropping and stared at the thick red water, imagining her beloved Zan smiling shyly up at her.
She had told the story to her son and then she had had another seizure.
They were supposed to stop now. She was home, on Antar, her baby should be safe, but the attacks kept coming. They were so painful. She had thought at first that maybe it was the loss of his father, but that couldn’t be it. Max would have been lost to them anyway.
Kivar had been furious when he discovered that she had not delivered the King, he had been ready to kill her, but then he had stayed his hand. She shivered, seeing the cold smile on his face when he told her she still might hold some use for him yet. He had run a finger over her jaw and then placed one hand over her womb.
She had had another seizure.
She was now suspecting her son was causing them. Not because he was dying, but because he wanted out. Out of her, away from her. He was rejecting her before he even knew her, just like everybody else.
Well she wasn’t going to let it happen. He was her son. Hers! She wasn’t going to give him up, she wasn’t going to stand to be ignored like his father had done. He would love her, love her without her mind games. She couldn’t use those anymore, they caused too much trouble. She saw Max’s angry face flash before her. Too much.
The pain rippled again and she crashed to the floor of her room. Kivar’s guards were there immediately, and they brought her to the medical ward. The healer inspected her in the detached way all doctors seemed to acquire and then nodded at her.
Her month was up.
She stared at her son as he played across the room. She had named him Bastian. A name. Hah. It was the only thing Kivar had allowed.
They had taken him from her immediately, she had no idea what had happened during that time apart. She had been drugged and was drifting in and out of consciousness. When they had finally placed him in her arms, she could tell something had been done to him.
He looked human, but that had been expected. He also looked exactly like his father. He had a full head of jet black hair and his open eyes were a honeyed amber. She had felt like crying from joy at the sight of him. But he gave her no sign of recognition, there was no connection between the two of them. He turned his head from her.
And then she felt like crying again.
That had been five months ago, and now she was again trying to connect to her five-year-old son. She felt robbed at what they had done. They had sped up his growth processes, he aged a year every month, he wouldn’t have a proper childhood.
Kivar had told her it needed to be this way. Bastian needed to be prepared to face his father when they landed on Earth, and he needed to be a man to do it. The program would stop when he reached his nineteenth year. He would never need her to kiss his scrapes, or tease him about a crush, or teach him to ride a bike, or anything. He was being trained for war, and that was it.
He was doing his school work now, sitting quietly on his bed in their chambers. She saw him frown slightly at the book in front of him. It was a huge book, much too big for a ten-year-old little boy. She had told Kivar that and he had laughed.
“Ava, don’t be ridiculous, knowledge is as important as training. He’ll be fine.”
She barely saw him though. He was always studying or playing war games and going over strategies with Kivar. She stayed in her rooms or went out, remembering her past. She wanted to go back to those days, when she was happy and had Zan’s whole-hearted adoration and love. They had dinner together occasionally, and rare moments like this when they were both at home, in the same location.
“Bastian? Do you need help, sweetie?”
He looked at her, surprised, and she walked all the way in. “What?”
“You looked confused. Are you having any trouble?”
“Oh, no…Mother, thank you. I was just reading an account of a trial from before the revolution. It’s an argument made between the Old King and my father.” She paused, arrested by his dismissive attitude and the terms he used.
Kivar had told him to call him Father, but he knew his real father was Max, or Zan. So which was he referring to? And which Old King? The term could again be applied to Zan or King Ruark, Zan’s father.
She looked at the title of the book and then back at her son. He wasn’t old enough to read about such things as murders and rapist cases and the criminal’s punishments, they would be too severe and icky for a young boy. It was just…inappropriate.
“I have to say, Ruark was a bit dense at time. He completely skipped over a pertinent portion of the evidence. Luckily Father caught it and the situation was remedied. Zan had a brilliant mind,” he commented absently, obviously lost back in his world of politics and justice. She could hardly believe the extensive vocabulary he had acquired in just ten short months. It was ridiculous. She'd never even used half of the words that came out of his mouth.
She nodded, feeling bereft of anything to say, and turned to leave, but she paused at the door and looked back at him hopefully. Maybe she was just a glutton for punishment, but…
“Are you sure you don’t need help?”
“No. I don’t need your help, Mother,” he replied, never looking up.
She nodded again and shut the door. She leaned against it heavily when it was closed, her eyes shut tight.
He didn’t need her at all.
She ran to her own room and flung herself on her bed, muffling her sobs in her pillow. She couldn’t let him hear. He already thought her a weak fool, she didn’t need to add to that image.
She couldn’t even blame Kivar for the distance between them, because he had done nothing. There was nothing in his programming to cause the detachment she felt from him. Indeed, Kivar had wanted to have them connected to ascertain his position. If Tess had Bastian, then he had Bastian. He was the Queen’s lover, he possessed the Crown Prince’s loyalty, and when he defeated Max he would rule with unquestioned.
That wasn’t what Tess wanted. None of this was ever what she wanted. At first she had wanted Max to love her, she wanted to be Queen of her home planet, but now…Now she wanted her son to love her, and she wanted to go home, to the Valenti house, where she had felt wanted.
But she wouldn't be wanted on Earth. Not by Kyle or Jim or Michael or Isabel, and especially not by Max or the humans. Not after what she’d done.
She’d split Max and Liz up.
She’d used them.
She’d killed Alex.
She’d betrayed them, him...
None of them would want her, just like no one here wanted her, not even her son.
He was just too much like his father.
Thanks for all the feedback, it's the most I've ever gotten on this story, keep it coming.