posted on 3-Nov-2001 2:48:18 PM by DMartinez
Author: DMartinez
Email: shockerdm⊕
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Gough, Millar and the WB, as well as Siegel and Schuster. No infringement intended.
Rating: NC-17
Category: Lex/Lana/Clark
Summary: Lex needs a distraction and thinks Clark and Clark's obsession with Lana are the way to go.


Part 1

Lex took a final look at the building his father had banished him to. This plant in Smallville could probably run itself without a hitch but it's where Lionel had sent his only son to start his career. Slipping into the new Porshe, he thought of how much his father despised having a son with such an abnormality as being bald since age nine.

He sat in the leather seat for a moment realizing that he had rarely taken the time to enjoy the feel before veering off that bridge. The thought that he could have died so young scared him. Hopefully the long drive home would clear his head of 'such mortal thoughts' as his father always said. The thought of his father was vile and prompted the weight of his foot on the gas pedal as soon as the ignition had been turned. Sometimes he wished his father could have been as protective over him as Jonathan Kent was over Clark.

Lex shook his head and manuevred a sharp turn, he was supposed to be clearing his head not cluttering it. He just needed to drive for a bit before going home to all the ghosts of Luthors' past. He whipped around another curve and then he was approaching the bridge. There he was, the recent object of Lex's thoughts. Clark Kent.

Clark was sitting on the newly repaired railing just like he had been when Lex's first Porshe had run it through and into the river. Young Kent was a work of fascination for Lex. he was young but had this weight about him like a worrisome old man; he wasn't exactly naive but had an innocence just the same. Lex passed over the bridge and pulled onto the side of the road. Smoothing his jacket as he climbed out of the car, Lex made his way over to the distracted teenager where he still sat staring at the water. "Not thinking of jumping, are you, Clark? As I recall, that water was quite cold last time."

"Huh? Lex?" Clark's dark head turned to take in the approaching man. He turned slightly. "Um, no... I was just thinking."

"Come on. I'll give you a ride home." Lex nodded his head in the direction of his car. "This one's even better than the last one. Brakes are good."

"No. It's okay." Clark flicked the older male a quick glance but threw his legs over to the road side of the railing.

"Come on, Clark. You look like you get too much excercise as it is. If I don't make you be a little lazy, I've got competition for the prettiest girls in town." The bald straightened his jacket a tad as he turned to return to his car. "I, on the other hand, could do with a walk now and again."

"No, you don't." Clark hopped off the railing and jogged to catch up with the slender man. "You have like a personal trainer, right?"

"I have several but you saw yourself. Hykia kicks my ass in fencing regularly." Lex continued his stroll down the road, making Clark note how really thin he was. "I need to win a match someday soon if I ever want to salvage my manhood in her eyes."

"You look like you could take her..." He hoped he sounded convincing. Hykia had really been sturdier built for athletic activities. Lex's build was more delicate but Clark couldn't tell him that.

"You should be the expert on decieving appearences, Clark. I could have sworn I hit you that day but here we both are, alive and approaching a burgeoning friendship." Lex stopped his walk and to look at Clark. "I ever tell you I had asthma? Probably not but when I was nine, I was playing in a corn field near the Smallville plant. I got lost and I started to panic. I couldn't breathe without my inhaler and that, I dropped after I saw a boy strung up on a stake like a scarecrow."

"What happened?"

"The meteor shower happened. I was running and trying to pick up my inhaler and then... I was flying. I woke up the bald misfit you see now, without asthma." Lex ran his gloved hand over his new car. "People constantly judge me by my bald head, Clark. It's a mixed blessing. I could have had a head full of flaming red hair. Now, you tell me which is the lesser of the two evils?"

"You had red hair?" Clark had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing.

"You bet." Lex shrugged his shoulders with a soundless laugh. "Regular carrot top. My father used to tease me about it... he doesn't say a word about my lack of hair, now."


"He took me to work with him that day. He wasn't watching me because he was too busy handling business." Lex pulled his keys out of his pocket and held them up. "So, come on. Let me show you waht the new car can do. Sometimes it feels like you're flying."

"Yeah?" Clark's blue eyes sparkled at the thought of riding in such a lavish car.

"I'll even let you drive her."

Clark's eyes went wide. "This? This car? Me?" His body gave a shiver. "I think I just had a cargasm."

Lex had to laugh. "Sure you can drive it." Lex tossed him the keys and strode over to the passenger car. "You can drive stick, right?"

"Um, yeah. Kinda had to learn. Tractors." Clark whispered as his fingers trailed over the smooth surface of the car. It reminded him of Lex's head.

"Ah, yes. John Deere." Lex let out a breath and leaned over the top of the car. "Between you and me, as fine as a John Deere is, this baby drives a lot smoother."

"Yeah." Clark agreed as he slid into the leather seat, suppressing a moan at the cool feel. His hand caressed the seat and then the gear shift. Lex let a smirk rest on his face as he watched Clark take in the feel of the car. Gently he turned the ignition. The car vibrated before he reached to shift gears. The short screech made them both cringe. "Sorry."

"Okay." Lex leaned forward. "This is not a John Deere. This is a Porsche." He leaned slightly closer. "Dad's caddie taught me to drive and well... Women always say that a man's car is just an extension of his manhood." He readjusted Clark's grip of the gear shift. "So treat it like one."

"Like an extension of myself?" Clark shook his head.

"Like your dick. Be firm but gentle. Gentle but firm. You know how you whack off so treat this gear shift the same way you treat your dick." Lex sat back. "Try it again."

Blushing furiously, Clark loosened his grip on the gear shift when he hit the clutch. The car slid smoothly onto the road. He marveled at the beauty of the world spinning by without even a sound he was used to when he drove his dad's truck.

"Glad to see you treat your dick so well." Lex let his infamous smirk cross his face again. He hadn't thought Clark could get any redder but the kid blushed again. "So what were you running from back there? This Lana Lang?"

"No." Clark answered too quickly. "Well... yeah. Kinda. She's got a boyfriend."

"Yes, I know. Big guy, letter jacket." Lex nodded. "That never stopped me. I've had many a girl that was spoken for."

"I'm not trying." Clark shook his head without taking his eyes off the road. "I'll be lucky if she'll ever be my friend."

"I'm not saying that you should get her to cheat on him. I'm not that devious." Lex cleared his throat because he had in fact gotten many girls to cheat on their boyfriends if even for one night. "I'm saying that you make her realize what a great guy you are so she dumps the no-neck and digs you."

"That will never happen." The younger male scoffed at the steering wheel. "She's totally out of my league and besides... first I'd have to talk to her without feeling like I'm going to throw up."

"Ah, geez. You, Clark Kent, have got it bad." The bald head hung low and shook slowly. "But I could help."

"Help? How?" Clark pulled the car into the entrance to his driveway and pulled to a stop just before the gate.

"Arrange for the two of you to get together." Lex turned to Clark. "What did she say when you returned her necklace?"

"Oh... um..." Clark's mouth worked up and down as he tried to explain.

"Let me guess. She found it and she was so grateful and now she thinks that jerk gave it back." He clucked his tongue.

"Pretty much, yeah."

"Tell you what. Come over Friday. Make arrangements to be gone all night. You need to loosen up Clark." Lex told him as he slipped the seatbelt off.

"I have chores." Clark protested weakly.

"Then do your chores before you come over. It's pretty simple actually."

"Well, I couldn't... I... Shit." Clark cursed as his eyes focused on his father standing in the barn staring back at them. "He's not going to let me go anywhere now."

"Simple. Don't tell him specifics. You're going to spend the night at a friends. Works every time." Lex opened his door and unfolded his tall body. He glanced around a bit before turning to wave at Jonathan Kent.

"Lex..." Clark jumped out of the car. "He'll know I'm lying. I can't lie to him."

"The best lies, Clark." Lex made his way over to the driver's side to his young friend. "The best lies are usually the ones with the most truth. Figure it out." He pat the younger male on the back as he moved to retake control of his car. "You figure out how to get out of the house... and I'll take care of everything else."

"What everything else?" Clark asked as Lex was shutting the door. "Lex?" Lex flashed him a smile through the window and sped off home. "Shit."


[ edited 2 time(s), last at 27-Nov-2001 2:02:40 AM ]
posted on 7-Nov-2001 7:00:25 PM by DMartinez
Part 2

Lex let himself into the stable and waited. He stood at the entrance watching Lana ride her horse around the field at a brisk trot. He would wait until Lana rode up on her horse. The thoughts crossed his mind quickly. This was the prize that Clark sought and being the grateful friend, he would get it for him.

It was no surprise that Clark, the most intriguing teenager Lex had ever met, would want the most intriguing gal in Smallville. There were prettier girls in Metropolis. There were even prettier girls in Smallville but Clark had his eye on Lana Lang.

It was understandable though. Lex had done his research. Ms. Lang was the most popular girl in her class, the smartest and the best rider in the county. She was a farmboy's wet dream. She was little, curvy, long haired, and green eyed. She was real, Lex could say that about her.

Her trot slowed when she spotted him. He must have that effect on her. Lex stepped up to her horse and reached up to stroke the horse’s muzzle. "She’s a beautiful beast."

"Thanks. She’s been well trained." Lana whispered as she swung to the ground. A second visit from Lex Luthor? What had she done wrong in a past life? That was mean but he and his family had a reputation that she had learned to respect. She brushed her horse's neck for a moment before leading it into the stable. The hooves clopped on the wood floor following by the light taps of her shoes and the hard clicks of Lex's shoes.

"I’ll bet." He followed at a non-threatening distance as she put the animal in its stall. "You busy Friday night?"

"What?" She snapped her head around to look at him. Her vision filled with the sight of his hairless naked body pressed up against that girl in the pool five years ago. She shook her head to rid herself of the image. "I have a boyfriend."

"Please, Lana." He scoffed at her, and then laughed at her blush. "I'm asking Clark over to my place as well" Lex flashed her a smile. "I might be lonely in Smallville but not that lonely." He approached her slowly. "I'd like to think of the two of us as friends, Lana. In this entire town, I have two friends and I feel like entertaining."

"Just me, you and Clark… I don't know." Lana sighed and closed the stall door with a click.

"Oh right… what would everyone think?" Lex widened his eyes at her and then shrugged. "The two of you could say I'm allowing you use of my library… or you could say nothing at all."

"I could…" She didn't finish her sentence because she didn't know whether or not she wanted to go. She had always wanted to see inside the manor and Clark was a nice guy. It could be fun. Besides, what did she care what everyone thought of her, right?

"Good. I'll tell Clark and then we'll just hang out." Lex turned to leave her to her chores before she had a chance to rethink things. "See you Friday."

As Lex strode out to his Porsche, he waved to Lana's aunt and flashed her a smile that faded as soon as he sat in his car. He might not have remembered Lana right away but no one forgot Nell, especially since she and Lionel had a 'special' relationship.

Nell Potter was a piece of work. Lex sped off as a shiver went down his spine. The woman had actually tried to hit on him once. It was never going to happen. His wild and crazy days were far from over but he wasn't that crazy.

He pulled onto the road and sped off to the Luthor manor. Clark's house flew by him. The fields of corn whipped by. Why in the hell was he so angry all of a sudden?

Lana was coming, Clark was coming. They would get together and that would be that. Lex couldn't let himself get bored so fast. If he did, he would go crazy. He would have to think of something else.


[ edited 1 time(s), last at 7-Nov-2001 7:01:42 PM ]
posted on 27-Nov-2001 2:01:49 AM by DMartinez
Part 3

Clark let himself into the Luthor manor and allowed himself a moment to marvel at the sheer size of the foyer, the polished floors and the expensive rugs. Lex was so blasé about all of this finery. It just blew Clark's mind that someone could have so much and not care for one second about all the possibilities.
Suddenly, the man himself burst through a set of doors down the corridor barking orders as he went. "Canceled. Canceled. Canceled. I'm not dealing with this now, Dominic."
"Lex, you have to." The man with a pair of thickly framed glasses and a very red face raced to keep up with the younger man.
"Have a question for you, Dominic." Lex stopped abruptly and turned to his subordinate. Dominic barely had time to stop before nearly colliding with his boss. "Do you question my father's authority this often?" His bald head tilted ever so slightly. "The case is closed, gentlemen. Leave it." Clark then noticed the two other men. They all looked like they wanted to say something but thought better of it. That's when Lex caught Clark's eye. "Clark! Good to see you again. I was just seeing my business associates to the door."
"Lex…" Dominic warned. "I'll have a word with—"
"Yes, yes. I'm sure you will. No one likes a tattletale, Dominic." Lex reached out and opened the front door. The trio of men trudged outside and no sooner had the last exited than the door clicked shut. Lex clapped his hands and turned back to Clark. "So. Hungry?"
"Sure." Clark nodded. "I can always eat."
"So. What are we going to do with ourselves?" Lex led Clark through the lower level to the kitchen. "No football practice?"
"Season's over." Clark shook his head. "I didn't even get to play a game."
"You're kidding. Rebelled for nothing, then." Lex stopped as he open the refrigerator. "What about Lana? Still serving the world's worst coffee?"
"She got fired." Clark winced slightly. "She really was bad, wasn't she."
"Like I said. The world's worst coffee." Lex shivered at the memory of his one cup of coffee served by Lana Lang. "She's not made for the blue collar life. She'll marry well."
"Huh?" Clark blinked. "What?" He took the container of Chinese food and carried it to the microwave. He leaned on the counter to wait for an explanation.
"Girls like Lana don't work. They marry well and serve as window dressing for their husbands." Lex poured himself a glass of water and punched the heating code into the microwave. "Granted, she's smarter than most girls but that will just make her the head of some charity for some great cause or another. It really just depends on her taste in men and whether or not she chooses to get away from here."
"What about guys like me?" Clark picked up an apple that had come from his farm and turned it over in his hands. The only reason he knew it was fresh from his farm was the slightly green tint on one side, the apples that Luthor Corp. drummed out tended to be a really bright solid red, unnatural, plastic looking.
"I don't know, Clark. I've never met a guy like you." Lex patted him on the back. Wrapping an arm around his shoulder, he guided him to a stool at the island in the center of the kitchen. "Normally farm guys stay farm guys but I don't see you working that field in five years. What do you want to be?"
"I… I never really thought about it." Clark studied his apple hard. "I mean, I read a lot. I… I think Chloe has struck me with the journalism bug. I'm beginning to see what she does when things happen. It's a story… I just don't know if I could be as ruthless as she is."
"Chloe?" Lex stepped away from his friend to retrieve the reheated Chinese food. His eyes narrowed slightly and his thin eyebrows waggled suggestively. "Don't tell me you have a girlfriend stashed away some place."
"No." Clark laughed and shook his head. "Chloe is my best friend. She's got this… 'Wall of Weird' that documents every odd event that's happened in Smallville since the Meteor shower."
"A fanatic. I see." Lex pulled out a fork and slid it over to Clark. "So… You like the research but not the heartlessness of reporting… We'll have to find something you can do." Lex thought about it then laughed. "I've got it. You can be the first journalist in the history of the world with any integrity. I don't know how far you'd go…"
"That's really funny, Lex." Clark rolled his eyes and poked at the carton of food. "I just… want to stop being invisible."
"If you keep making the headlines, you'll reach that goal very fast." Lex took a seat next to his friend and stared at him hard. "If I ask about Lana again are you going to change the subject again?"
"Oh." The dark haired boy blushed. "So you noticed."
"Contrary to what a lot of people believe when they first meet me. I am very perceptive." He leaned in closer. "So. Lana."
"She's just… great and I'm not." Clark bowed his head and pushed his carton of food away. "There is no way she'll ever see me."
"I really doubt that." A thin eyebrow went up. "What if I said she saw you as a friend? And a pretty good one at that?"
"What?" Clark's head went up. "What are you talking about? Have you been talking to her about me?"
"About you? No. Concerning you, maybe. I invited her over tonight and she didn't agree until after I said you would be here."
"What?" His blue eyes widened and he began looking around for a reflective surface to check his hair. "Lana's coming here?"
"Yes. She said she could. I took that as a yes." Lex made no effort to hide his smile at the way Clark had become so animated. "Relax. This isn't active matchmaking and if it were, you'd already have her. We are going to hang out like a trio of bums."
"Just hang out?" The farm boy sat down once more. "I thought you had a plan. I thought you always had a plan."
"Clark. My life has been planned since I could walk. I like not having plans sometimes. It's quite… freeing." Lex stood and motioned for Clark to follow him. "I was raised by a lovely boarding school in London. I've spent enough time on schedules and having tea. I crave disorder. College only gave me a taste of what I'm missing."
"You're just trying to cover your ass for inviting her without telling me." Clark followed Lex down a flight of stairs to a weight room twice the size of Smallville High's gymnasium. "Wow."
"Do you know how to use any of this stuff? I figured if I could build up… something, I could take Hykia by the end of the year." Lex picked up a five-pound dumbbell and lifted it easily over his head.
"Fencing doesn't look like it requires strength training so much as speed and agility." Clark commented.
"Ever lifted a saber? Tried to keep it steady for long periods of time?" Lex dropped the dumbbell and began pulling off his shirt. He turned an arm toward Clark. "These arms were sculpted first by long hours with a foil, then a saber and finally an epee. It's harder than it looks."
Not to be out-done, Clark whipped off his own shirt. "Shoveling manure, lifting crates and hay."
"You're such a show-off, Clark." Lex's smirk crossed his face, his eyes shot past him to the entryway. "Lana, glad you could make it."
Lana stood planted to the floor. There stood two half-dressed guys and both of them had incredible builds. "Um, I just walked in. Security directed me down here."
"Ah, so they do their jobs sometimes." Lex let out an exaggerated sigh. "It seems they have their backs turned whenever Clark shows up. He never gets announced."
Clark whipped his shirt back over his head and managed a small smile at Lana, suddenly weak in the knees when she approached. She was wearing her necklace.
"So, let's go upstairs. I have movies, games… I think." Lex shrugged into his shirt but didn't bother to button it up. "What would you kids like to do?"
"Hmm. I have a feeling you've seen all the movies and played all the games." Lana nodded her head slowly then turned to Clark. "I think we need to do something he hasn't done before."
"I think you might be right." Clark nodded, readily agreeing to whatever she had in mind.
"We'll need bananas, chocolate, pineapple, strawberries…" Lana trailed off when Clark grinned and nodded before turning toward Lex once more. "Some whipped cream…"
"Lana, you're scaring me." Lex teased lightly. "What would we do with all that? Sounds kinky to me."
Lana blushed a little but managed to keep her voice even to pull his mind out of the gutter. "Find some Vanilla ice cream and make a banana split."

posted on 27-Nov-2001 2:02:13 AM by DMartinez
Part 4

Lex looked bewildered at the mountain Clark was making in his bowl as well as the mess across his kitchen island. "Clark, you just ate… how are you going to eat all that?"
"I told you. I can always eat." Clark flashed him a broad smile and moved cautiously as not to get caught too near Lana. Just being in the same room as that necklace made him a little dizzy but he could handle it as long as she was on the other side of the island.
"And can you eat." Lana shook her head and reached for a scoop of ice cream. "Remember Nick Grainger's 8th birthday party? I think you ate three times what everyone else did… including Mr. Grainger."
Clark blushed a little at the memory. He had also almost gotten sick to his stomach when they had played Red Rover and tried to break between Lana and Cheryl Davis. "Yeah, nearly keeled over later though."
"How exactly is this fun, again?" Lex dropped another goopy ball of ice cream into his bowl and glanced at their bowls. "How can anyone eat that much?"
"Lex." Lana shook her head at him. "Just flow with it. Have fun. Make a mess." Just then a spoonful of ice cream hit her neck. Her head snapped around. "Clark!"
"What?" His blue eyes opened wide in a façade of innocence. He licked his spoon thoughtfully and shrugged, then quickly ducked a cherry she tossed at him.
Lana narrowed her eyes at him and wiped at her neck, noticing her necklace had gotten caught. She started to take it off so she could rinse it under the water faucet. Lex noticed how Clark kept moving around the kitchen, keeping Lana at a certain distance at all times. The memory of the necklace and the lead box came to mind. "Lana, why don't you let me leave that here for Henry. He'll clean it up for you."
"Um, ok." Lana handed the necklace over and then noticed the bare contents of his bowl. "You ever going to finish making that banana split?"
"I'll finish it." Lex set the necklace in a butter dish and pushing it to the inside corner of the counter. When he returned, he dumped some toppings onto his ice cream and bananas. "Where's the whipped cream?"
"This?" Clark asked from behind him two seconds before a cold sensation on his scalp made Lex gasp. Lana burst out laughing at the expression on Lex's face when he realized what Clark had done. He turned in time to see Clark shooting a spray of whipped cream into his own mouth. Narrowing his eyes, Lex quickly grabbed Clark's hand, keeping the spray of whipped cream open.
Clark sputtered to keep from choking on the creamy mass that shot to the back of his throat. He stumbled backward a few steps to recover and stop laughing. "If you don't watch it, you'll be giving me mouth to mouth this time."
"I'll have to be more careful then." Lex nodded and decorated his banana split. "You my friend, have the worst breath of anyone I ever met."
"Lex, do you and your friends ever horse around like this?" Lana asked softly, breaking up the camaraderie between the two guys, reminding them she was still there.
"The last time any of the people I consider friends ever horsed around, it wasn't with me." Lex shook his head and picked up a spoon to lead them out of the kitchen and into the den with a tuft of whipped cream still sitting on his head. "Back then I was an outcast. I had asthma and a head full of hair so red that Ronald McDonald himself was jealous."
Clark snorted at the image and ducked a swat from Lex. They settled in front of the couch between the fireplace and the entertainment system.
"When I could horse around, we had elevated to finer things." Lex shrugged slightly and picked at his banana split.
"Such as…?" She prodded. "I want to know exactly how much we're boring you now."
"Yeah, Lex. If we were the guys from your high school, what would we be doing now?" Clark reached over and scooped the whipped cream from his friend's head. "Bet it's not ice cream."
"Whipped cream maybe but not ice cream." Lex thought about it. "I actually don't think I'm allowed to corrupt minors by telling them about the things we did."
"Oh, come on." Clark pressed. "How bad could it have been? You went to a boarding school didn't you?"
Lex shot Clark a look. "You really want to know?"

posted on 29-Apr-2002 2:21:57 AM by DMartinez
Lana and I are at odds... I (and this is a first for me) may not continue with this story at this particular time or even with this current set of situations.

I'd hate to kill the story but I can't move forward with it. sigh.

If I do continue... it will probably be rewritten.