|posted on 31-Aug-2001 9:38:29 AM|
Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me.
Category: Heavy Max and Liz
Summary: Liz will go back in time using the Granolith to change the future. Seriously sad and sacrificial.
Feedback: Love to hear your sorrows.
Note: This is the previously written start to Sacrifice II. But it has nothing to do with that story. It's just that equally sad.
Everything around them was full of black dust. Buildings were crumbled to the floor, cars were on fire, bodies were torn apart all over the bloody ground. Seven people however, were situated near the cave, away from the destruction. They were seven people barely able to compensate what had happened. Everything was gone and of the group two were seriously injured. No one could help them, not even Max’s healing ability. Maria remained sitting on the ground, holding Michael in her arms. Her tears dropped onto Michael’s bruised face. Max and Alex tried to make things better for Isabelle on the ground but it did not work. They put raggedy clothes over her to keep her warm, but she kept shivering from the trauma. All the physical pain was not as strong and forceful as Liz’s mental anguish. She stood within the group, with such guilt, watching all the gore. She couldn’t even cry from all the pain. She was badly bruised as well, but Max was able to heal the wound. She realized that all this destruction was her fault. She could’ve prevented it with greater measures, but she was weak, weak as a feather. She couldn’t let go because of her selfish reason-love. Because of love, she ended risking everyone’s lives—her friends and family. She knew she should’ve done it a long time ago, but she didn’t have the audacity to hurt herself or Max again. She had learned her lesson now. She was able to take a glimpse into what would’ve happened, the immeasurable consequences that would be incurred upon all the earth. She began to slowly back away from everyone, unable to say good-bye to them forever. Max sensed the distance between him and Liz. He immediately got up and ran to her, not willing to let anything happen to the love of his life. She was the reason he was able to stay strong.
Max’s equally sorrowful face was expressed to Liz. She couldn’t bear to lose him, but she knew she had to do what was best, even if it meant sacrificing her own life for everyone else’s.
Max grabbed her arm and brought her back into her arms, crushing her into his chest. She allowed the tears to seep into his ripped up shirt. The pain hurt so much. The physical pain couldn’t come close to the emotional pain. She tried to pull away, but he held onto her stronger than before, pressuring her head into his soul. She gave up, and led her hands around his waist. When her hands reached around his waist, she felt something in his back pocket. As she allowed her hands to follow the contours of the object, she realized it was the crystal, the mystical crystal that could change things for the better. The crystal proved to Liz that it was a sign for her to take action. She looked up into Max’s eyes. It was a look she would never forget. His eyes were glistened with tears, knowing fully that he felt that it was his fault. He felt he was a crest fallen leader who let his family die in his own hands. Liz realized she could finally fix that pain. She tilted her head and kissed him. He didn’t know it but it was a good-bye kiss. While she kissed him, she grabbed the crystal and knife from his pocket and pushed him away. The action forced everyone to look in their direction.
“Liz what are you doing. Stop.” Maria wailed at Liz from the ground, not being able to lose another close being.
Liz held the crystal in one hand and the knife in the other, but the knife was directed to her neck. “Don’t come near me. It’s all my fault and I’m going to fix it all. I promise.” She said as she began to back away quickly.
Max immediately got up to try to run to her. “Liz stop, put the knife down. Don’t do this. I can’t lose you too.”
“No, Max you can lose me. You can live without me, but you can’t live without your family, Isabelle or Michael. Everyone is better off without me because everything is my fault. And you can’t stop me. So just stay back Max.” She inched the knife closer to her neck. “If you don’t back away, I’ll do it, I’ll do it to a point where even you can’t heal me Max.” She began to look threatening and so Max backed away. When she saw him do that, Liz ran away from them like lightening. Liz was able to run, but Max ran after her into the cave where it held the pods.
Max followed Liz into the cave and into the granolith. Before he could reach her, Liz entered the granolith’s haven and shut the door behind her, leaving Max banging on the door.
“Liz please…” Max begged while trying to jam the door open.
Liz kneeled against the door and allowed her hands to feel the coolness of the door. “I’m sorry Max. I’m going to make things right. I’m doing it for you. It was my fault that Tess left. I could’ve prevented it from happening, but I didn’t because I loved you too much and I still do. I love you too much for you to suffer like this. I love Isabelle and Michael too much for them to die in my best friends’ arms. After this, you’ll never know me Max…” Liz began to get up to prepare for her plan. “I love you Max.”
“Liz don’t. Please don’t. I love you too much and if you love me then you’ll come back to me.” Max said while tears formed in his eyes, knowing what Liz was going to do.
Liz ignored him and she inserted the crystal into the key hole and allowed herself to take hold of the granolith’s power to take her back to the faithful day, the day that she was supposed to die from that gunshot wound in the Crashdown.
Max was finally able to open the door and Liz was gone already. The knife laid on the smooth ground and next to the floor was Liz’s ring, the bracelet he gave her when they cemented their relationship. He held onto, knowing that soon that day would never occur and this ring would become nonexistent.
Liz was able to teleport herself to the day before the shooting. She ended in front of Max’s bedroom window. She wiped away her tears as she approached the window slowly. She realized that Max wouldn’t believe any of this at all. He would probably react the way she did the when it happened to her. It didn’t matter anymore; she was going to be brave and direct. She knocked on the window. She had to know a few times before Max would come.
“Michael it’s the middle of the night…” Max opened his curtain and realized that it wasn’t Michael, but someone who looked like an older version of Liz. “Liz?”
Max couldn’t believe this at all. Something wasn’t right about this picture. It looked like Liz, but the Liz he longed for everyday had a youthful playfulness, an innocence that caught onto his soul, but the Liz that he was staring at was tired, hurt and mature yet still so beautiful.
“Max, it’s me. I know you’re running in doubt right now, but you have to believe me. I know everything about you. Everything.”
Max began to back away, grasping onto to his greatest fear—his secret. No one knew about them and now this person who looked and acted like Liz was saying she knew. Max was on panic mode and that rarely occurred with his calm and rational demeanor.
“Max listen to me. Don’t be afraid. I’m here to help you, to change things.”
“What things? What are you talking about?”
“I’m from the future. 10 years later things happen Max. Oh god, there is so much you don’t know. But 10 years later, Earth is captured by your enemies Max.”
Max couldn’t believe his ears. He thought he was dreaming and in his dream, he was really going in the deep end with his alien heritage and the love of his life. Liz realized she was getting nowhere with him. She couldn’t blame him. He was not during that period in time where he was just living his life as a normal teenager with absolutely no knowledge of his destiny. She decided to do what he would’ve done in this situation—connecting with him. She looked deep into his eyes and he was immediately traumatized. He felt the heat radiating between them, the love between them that was so familiar yet so strange. He never experienced this before and he became so drawn into Liz’s mature presence.
“Max connect with me,” she said in a gentle and sweet tone. Max was hesitant in doing this because he was shocked that she knew what he could do. She looked down on his gentle hands and took them and placed them on her cheeks. She memorized the feeling. Immediately the connection began and they Max felt the love and pain that was radiating from Liz’s soul. He saw the day he saved her at the Crashdown, he saw a short, blond girl leave Roswell and he was left with an image of Michael and Isabelle dying. He immediately broke the connection and was gasping for air. He immediately fell to the floor while trying to comprehend all the suffering he saw and the amazing love between himself and Liz. It was too unimaginable.
“Oh my god,” Max managed to get our between breaths.
Liz immediately went down on the floor and bent down in front of him. She looked straight into his eyes with all truth and honesty.
“Now do you see Max.” Max nodded with such grief. “We have to prevent that from happening.”
“What do we have to do?”
“Not we. You.”
“What do you mean?”
“You have to let me die.”
Max stood in shock and what Liz said to him. Max pushed himself away from Liz and began to shout. “No, I’m not going to let you die. There has to be another way.”
“Max, there is no other way. We tried and looked where it ended up. You have to understand that I’m in the way of your future duty. Because of me, everyone died. Because you saved me that day, everything went wrong. Everyone’s lives were put at risk and we have to prevent that from happening.”
“If I let you die, I let go of what I saw, what I felt.”
Liz turned around so she wouldn’t have to face him. He didn’t even know how hard it was to do this. Now he realized how the future Max felt when he made her do those things. It felt like a knife was put through her heart and now it was in reverse. It felt so strange to face the past with her future love in front of her. He was so young and beautiful making her realize how she was so blind not to realize his love for her back then. It was strange to see Max without bruises or blood from his hand. She wanted Max to never have blood on his hands and she was going to fulfill this plan.
“If you don’t let me go, you let go of what you have now. Are you willing to let Michael and Isabelle die? Are you willing to let them shed blood on our hands? You felt the pain and suffering. Is that what you want?” Liz turned around and screamed at him. She finally calmed down. “You won’t lose anything by letting me go because we never had anything, but you Michael, and Isabelle share 8 years of love, pain and joys. You can’t let that go. Do you want to let that go, to let them go?”
Max became silent knowing she was right and he managed to say a quiet ‘no.’ He began to realize the things that would happen. He knew there was no other way if Liz came to do such a thing.
Liz nodded at him as her tears fell like a waterfall. “Ok then. We have to change as little as possible so you have to still go with Michael to the Crashdown tomorrow. But this time, when I get shot you…I remain shot.”
Max nodded as he allowed Liz to talk him into letting her go forever.
“I’m sorry Max.”
“No, I’m sorry.”
“For loving you and letting you die.” Max said while his own tear fell to the floor
They were now sitting on Max’s bed, not knowing what to say to each other for they were mere strangers, yet they felt the connection.
“How…I mean what happened between us after that day?” Max asked with uncertainty. He knew he shouldn’t ask because it would makes things harder, but he had to know. He felt that he deserved to know.
“I can’t…We can’t discuss it. It will make things harder.” Liz shook her head lightly.
“Liz you come back from the future to tell me that I have to let you die and then you tell me that you can’t tell me about our lives together. How is that fair?”
“Well then make it at least somewhat fair…for us,” Max became desperate in tone and Liz was able to recognize that.
“There is no us. Not anymore at least. Even if I tell you what happened between us, it will never happen. There is no point.” Liz wanted to take this turn in the conversation. If she even began to describe what they had throughout the years, it would hurt too much and it will definitely prevent Max from doing what he had to do.
“Fine. But if I don’t save you what will happen to the course of the future. I mean how will I find out what I have to do?”
“I don’t now, but it’s something that will come to you at the right time and place.”
“I don’t know if I can do this Liz,” Max said as he buried his head in his hands.
“You can. You are always the one who knows what is the right course of action and this is the right course of action.”
“I’ll never be able to live with myself for letting you die.” Max looked at the side of Liz’s face, which was marked by a stream of tears.
“And all of you will never be able to live to find out if you don’t.” Liz turned around to show how hard it was for her to ask him to do this. “I’m tired, Max. Tired of all of this. Just please end it ok.”
Max realized that his future self has caused all this pain to be endured by Liz Parker. Everyday as he went to school, he saw a vibrant, carefree girl with a future ahead of her. She was always so ecstatic when she was around Alex and Maria. She would always stick by the both of them. When Alex’s book bag was tossed back and forth by football players, Liz immediately ran up and yelled at all of them with threats that were unheard of from Liz’s mouth ever before. Then Maria came by to add some more colorful warnings. Her strength that was encountered between her and her two best friends was transmitted across to the both of them instead. All her youthfulness was gone and now she was sitting there waiting to die and fade away for ever because of her strength.
“Please Max, let me sleep. I’m just so tired.” With those words said, Liz lay on the floor and let her troubles rest aside for one night, her last night. Max thought no more and got a blanket and a pillow for her to rest comfortably as much as possible. He swept some hair from her face and whispered “I love you, I always will.”
“You know Max, you could’ve at least looked a bit more decent when you came out with me Max,” Michael lectured to his best friend. “I thought you always wanted to look at least half normal around Liz Parker.”
The name struck a chord within Max. This time it wasn’t the feeling of embarrassment, but it became a look of desolation. He just stared back at Michael with a blank face.
“God, lighten up. That girl is going to break a chord with you. It’s going to get us all in trouble.”
Max looked down at the table of uneaten food. He couldn’t eat. If he ate, he would vomit right there on the table. He still felt her presence around, the future Liz that is. That morning, she said to him that she would be across the street in the back alley of the museum. He lent her some dark clothes to wear so that no one would recognize her. The feeling was so strong and so controlling.
On the other side of the restaurant, Maria was gabbing constantly about how Max was looking at Liz once again. Max saw her laugh and her eyes brighten up. It was so strange to compare this Liz to the future one. It frightened him that within minutes both of his Liz’s would no longer be on this earth with him. He would no longer get that future he always dreamt of with her.
“Liz!” Maria shouted across the café. Everyone got down as they saw the shining gun appear through the air. This time Max didn’t duck as he would’ve originally. This time he let his eyes see the bullet pierce through Liz’s fragile body. Everything went in slow motion as Liz collapsed onto the floor like a feather. Max’s first instinct was to run to her and heal her right there, but instead his head turned around to the strong feeling he had encountered. He turned around and saw a distant figure across the street, shaking her head. He watched the two gunmen run out of the café and into the streets. He turned back his attention on Liz when he heard Maria shout for Liz on the floor. He immediately got up and when he sprinted up, Michael held him back.
“What are you going to do?” Michael looked at him with piercing and dangerous eyes. Max looked back with confusion and helplessness. When Michael realized that Max was loosening up and was not going forward, he let go of his grip on Max. Max stepped back and watched the scene in horror as Maria ran to her best friend.
“Oh my god, Liz. Someone call an ambulance.” Maria shouted with such horror. She was crying so hard as she grabbed a nearby towel to try to stop the bleeding. Max thought back to himself, “It’s not going to work. She’s going to die right there in front of me.”
“Liz, don’t leave me ok. Just hang on the ambulance is coming. Come on Liz hang on for me. I need you,” Maria kept saying to her dying best friend.
Max stayed in the same position watching the scene unfold. He couldn’t go save her. Half of it was because of what Liz told him and half was this powerful force preventing him from doing so. He knew that the future Liz had this hold over him and it hurt him so much that she was doing this.
The ambulance immediately came and they practically knocked him over. He watched as they tried to stop the bleeding. They immediately took her to the ambulance, while Maria begged to come along. They allowed her to come and Max and the rest of the witnesses remained standing there in the middle of the café with shock. Immediately everyone began to talk and whisper. Not long afterwards, Sheriff Valenti and his units came to the scene to close off the area. Not long afterwards, he went straight to him and Michael and questioned them. Max found himself unable to answer any of his questions.
“Son are you ok?” Valenti asked with concern.
“He’s just a bit in shock right now Sheriff. I’m sure he can answer your questions at a later time,” Michael assured the sheriff, as he feared that he would suspect anything about them.
Valenti looked back at the both of them and finally relented. “Ok.”
“Thanks a lot Sheriff.” Michael pulled Max away and they went to the outside of the café.
“Hey Max are you ok?” Michael was now really worried about him. He never saw him this way. He looked so dead. “Look, you couldn’t do anything Max.”
Max looked back at him angrily and said, “No I could’ve, but I didn’t.” Max immediately walked away from Michael and ran across the street.
Liz was across the street and she was able to vaguely see what had happened. She kept thinking and wondering that this was supposed to happen. I was supposed to be dead. When she heard the shot ring through her ears, she ran her fingers across her stomach. She could almost feel the wound. It was going to be over soon. She couldn’t watch anymore. It hurt too much to see Maria lose her. She didn’t want Maria all alone either. She understood how Maria always had a heart of stone, but she was her best friend and she knew that when she lost her father, it hurt a lot. Liz was there for her and now she would never be there for her, to go through the pains together. She realized that she didn’t think about how Maria, Alex and her parents would become after she was dead. It hurt to think about it. All she could say was that she was doing it for them. As walked slowly back around the alley, she felt Max behind her.
“Why!?” Max began to shout at her. She turned around to face him. “Why did you come back and make me do this? Do you know how much it hurt knowing that I could’ve done something, but I didn’t? How could you just give up on us like that? I shouldn’t have listened to you. I shouldn’t…” Max was going to continue to talk, but then he heard a painful voice rip through his ears.
“Max, oh god, it hurts.” Liz collapsed onto the floor as she held one hand on her stomach and the other at the wall for support. “I can feel it now, the gunshot. Why can I feel the pain?”
“Oh god.” Max placed his hand over her stomach to try to ease the pain, but it didn’t work.
“You can’t do anything. My past self can’t fight it, so neither can I.”
Max, realizing his powers would not work, picked her up and when he was sure no one was looking, he helped her into the back seat of the car and drove back to his house.
Max gently placed Liz on his bed, while she continued to have painful tears in her eyes. He was yet again watching Liz die right before his eyes, never ever knowing what could’ve been.
“It’ll be ok, Max. Everything will be ok.” Liz took a deep breathe as she began to relax.
“You’re wrong. Nothing will ever be ok.”
Liz, despite her pain could feel the emotion rollercoaster they were both going through.
“Max,” she whispered. “Come her and lie next to me.”
Max looked at her and he had a look of fear. He didn’t want to have her die in his arms. It would be too painful, but he erased that thought. He was being selfish. She was the one who risked everything and she had no one but him right now.
“Max, I’m so sorry I did this to you.” Max immediately placed his finger on her lips to prevent her from talking anymore. “No, Max. You’re right, it’s not fair. I want to tell you about our life, but it just hurts so much Max.”
“Shhh… save your strength. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to Liz.”
“No I want to, but you must promise to do the things I ask you.” Liz looked up at him with desperate eyes, knowing she didn’t have enough time left.
“I’ll do anything for you Liz.”
Liz nodded. “Maria and Alex are the next closest things to me. They mean the world to me. I watched Maria lose another person in her life and she will become so lost. She needs someone, Max. Please, watch over her. In the other world, Maria and Michael fell in love, try to make it happen once again, as it is so for Isabelle and Alex. They proved to be useful and dependable through their love, Max. Trust them and take of them for me. When the time is right, tell them I love them and tell them I am so sorry.” Liz gently placed his hand on Max’s face as he lay next to her. She gently wiped the tears away from Max.
“Liz…” Max said as he gently swayed on her brown hair.
Liz immediately put her finger on his lip. “Shhh.” She enjoyed the feel of his lips on her fingertips. It was so smooth and electrifying. She slowly removed her finger away from his lips and guided her hand to her pocket. She pulled out a worn out folded picture. She gently unfolded it and looked at it with such love and sadness. She showed the picture to Max. “It’s our wedding picture. I carry it where ever we go.”
Max with such fright took the picture from her hand and looked at it with shock. He used his hand to stroke the picture, wanting to feel the moment. The picture was so magical. He looked so mature and so in love and that image was shared by Liz. She was adorned with a slim, lacy white gown that went one foot beyond her leg. Her hair was strapped with tiny, flecks of roses. She was looking into his eyes with such love and devotion as they sat on a bench below Victorian style scenery. Flower petal were falling down on the both of them as they smiled at each other. “You look so beautiful,” Max managed to hush between his thoughts.
Liz touched his hand and immediately they connected through the picture. Max immediately shut his eyes and images of their wedding night flashed her their minds as he saw everyone dancing under the night sky. There was so much laughter. The night they first made love shuddered throughout his whole body. He could feel the emotions, the joy, the friendships he had never known and most of all he could feel love. The night he proposed to her flashed through his mind. He could feel the nervousness, the clumsiness and the fear as he asked her to spend the rest of her life with him, how he wanted to wake up next to her every morning, knowing that she was his.
When Liz removed her hand from Max, the images stopped at a halt, but the feelings and emotions were still there. Max was gasping for air. It was shocking to Liz, because it was usually in reverse. Max would provide the flashes and she would be gasping for air.
“Oh my god.” That was all Max was able to say.
Liz closed her eyes and leaned towards Max’s forehead to enjoy the last moments. She could feel her past self losing the battle of life. She was slowly vanishing away from the last shred of humanity. Liz tried to grab hold of this moment and let it last forever. She was becoming weaker and weaker. The only thing going for her was this feeling of normalcy with Max.
“I’m not going to have that,” Max said softly.
“No you won’t.”
“I want that life. I want you to stay with me and let me love you.”
“You can’t. Not with me that is. Max. You have to promise me that when she comes, you will love her like you love me. Promise me that.”
“I can never love anyone else.”
“I know but she is the one who can understand you, lead you and help all of you. She will need your love and you will need to give her that love or all that I have done has failed. Please just promise me that.”
Max, knowing that this was her dying wish, nodded towards Liz. “Ok. I will do it for you.”
“Do it for the people you love so dearly.”
Max realized that Liz was slowly leaving him and he would be left alone in this world. “No, please don’t leave me.”
“I have to. Just remember that I did it all for you because I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“Close your eyes, Max.” Liz gently put her hands on his face as his eyes slowly drifted downwards. Liz with all her strength leaned towards him and gently placed her lips on top of his. They both slowly kissed and allowed all their emotions to enter one another. They were able to taste each other’s tears. As they continued to kiss, Max was unable to feel her anymore. When he opened his eyes, he realized he was all alone. He looked back down at the picture and he realized that the picture of them was gone. It was blank. He now knew that he had changed the future. Liz was gone.
At the same time as Liz disappeared, two friends and two parents held onto each other as the doctor informed them that they couldn’t save her. They too had lost the most precious being. Maria held on to her mother and to Alex, not wanting to let go of either one of them for the fear of losing them too. Losing Liz was like losing a soul sister to Maria and it tore her heart apart. Alex tried to hold back his tears but they were too strong. All his memories with Liz was flashing through his mind, all the times she saved his butt at school, her silly alien jokes that he learned to adapt to, and the times where all three of them would just sit at the park at night and just be friends. These things couldn’t happen anymore. Liz was gone. The pain was too tremendous for the Parkers to endure. They had lost their one and only little angel. Her passing was a loss to everyone, yet only Max knew that her passing was a sacrifice to everyone around her. And for that, she was truly an angel.
“You meant a lot to people and people still can’t stand the idea that you are gone. I can’t. I can’t help but feel that I could’ve prevented it, but you wouldn’t want me too. I’ve learned that you would rather die for the people you love. I just don’t know how I’m going to live without you. I don’t know if I will be ready for what’s to come without you.” Max slowly walked up to the headstone and placed his flowers in the front. He slowly ran his fingers over the tombstone. “I couldn’t bear to go to the funeral, Liz. I just hope you understand that. I just couldn’t see you like that. I hope you can forgive me.” Max began to form tears in his eyes as he stood in front of her grave.
The voice startled Max. He turned around to find Alex and Maria standing in front of him with flowers in their hands.
“I’m sorry. I should go.”
“No, she would want you to stay,” Maria said gently. They both slowly proceeded her grave and placed the flowers next to Max’s. “She would’ve have like that you were here, Max. She always liked you anyway. I always told her to stop being so stubborn and go for it already.” Maria began to laugh between her tears.
“It’s ok, Maria. Let it out.” Alex began to coax her the best that he could.
Maria began to recuperate and she turned around to face Max. She realized that he loved her too. He probably loved her more than anyone could imagine. He stood there so helpless and alone. Maria saw his regret, his guilt and sorrow. She went over to him and hugged him with all her might. “She knows Max. She knows.”
Max now understood that she did know. He would fulfill everything she wanted him too and this was the first step towards it. He as the loner finally let the ones she loved into his life. He would protect them and watch after them for her. He with great care hugged Maria back and looked up at the sky, knowing she was watching them.