posted on 12-Oct-2001 10:26:13 PM
Hmm...this story seems to have disapeared. Oh well, I'll just repost it.

Title: I Died
Author: brigittabehr
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I don’t own Roswell, blah, blah, blah but I do own Lex, Jen, etc.
Summary: you’ll have to read it…its really dark, but might get better.
Note: POV, some regular


September 2, 2001

I’m Michael Guerin and five days ago, I died. God, I sound like Liz. Liz…I miss her so much. I can’t believe she did this to us, to Max. Then again, Max turned around and did the same thing. The boy just couldn’t live without her. I don’t know how we’re supposed to go on without them. Maria has completely lost it. All she does is drink. Kyle mediates all day long and Iz, well, she just wanders around in a daze. What bugs me is that they don’t seem to realize that I’m affected too. When Liz killed herself, the world grew a little bleaker. But when Max copied her, the light just went out. I died too.
Max was my best friend, no matter how much I fought with him. I loved him like a brother and would have done anything for him. And Liz, she was really growing on me. I’m still not sure what made her snap. All I know is that she walked out of my apartment one night to go home and get something, but never returned. We all got worried and went over to her apartment, only to find her in her bedroom, dead. She had slit her wrists. God, there was so much blood. We tried our hardest to bring her back, but there was no use. We were all destroyed and went home after talking to Valenti and Hansen. In our grief, I guess nobody thought to stay with Max. Maria and I went over the next morning with Kyle to check up on Max and Iz. When Max wouldn’t open his door, I opened it and found that he had blown his brains out while cradling a picture of Liz in his free arm.
The joint funeral was the worst day of my life. I thought it would never end. This has given me two missions. One is that I need to protect Maria, Isabel and Kyle. I can’t lose them. Without Maria, Kyle and Isabel, I’d have nothing.
The other is that I need to discover what happened to Liz. I need it to maintain my sanity. God help me.


God, its my first day back at school since it happened. It feels so weird being here without them, so wrong. We’re all wearing black. That’s the only color we wear anymore. Kyle and I are wearing black jeans with black button down shirts; Maria is wearing black sweat pants, a black spaghetti strap top, and a black hoodie; and Izzy is wearing a black skirt and black shirt. We all look like hell and everyone at school is just too nice to say anything about it.

Yeah right. Everyone has been whispering about us all day. Like they need to whisper. We know exactly what they’re saying. “Look, it’s the cult.”, “Wow, first Alex, then Tess and now Max and Liz. I’d hate to be part of that group.”, and “Jeez, everyone in their group is dying. They’re such freaks.” Those are my personal favorites. Of course, there is some sympathy, but there’s mostly morbid curiosity.

I’ll tell you who I’d like to add to the dead list; that damn Pam Troy. Right now, she’s walking in my direction. I just know she’s going to say something to piss me off.

“Hi, Michael,” she drawls sweetly. A little too sweetly.

“What do you want, Pam?” I ask, not at all hiding my annoyance.

“I just wanted to see how you’re doing.”

“Well, Pam, three of my friends have died within the last five months. All three of them were declared a suicide. How the fuck do you think I feel, you heartless bitch?”

Well, that did it. Pam’s eyes widened in shock and now she’s walking off, muttering about damn cult people. Whatever, I don’t care. I turn around to go to the parking lot and that’s when I see her. Liz. What the fuck? I blink a few times and look back in that direction. She’s gone. I hate it when I see things.

Shift to Kyle POV

“What the fuck?” I mumble aloud.

Liz. I just saw Liz. Buddha, I’m seeing things again. Just last week I swear I saw Max outside of my house. Really. I was driving up the street and I could have sworn he was peeking inside the living room window. When I got closer, he just disappeared into thin air. Literally.

“Hey, Kyle,” Isabel says softly.

I look at her and give her a small smile. She’s been so quiet lately. I think she blames herself for not being there to help Max. She couldn’t have stopped him, no one could. That’s why I owe it to her to find out why Liz really killed herself so she’ll stop blaming herself for Liz’s death too. By Buddha, I will find out, even if it kills me.

Isabel POV

I wonder what's up with Kyle. I mean, besides Max and Liz's deaths. He looks like he saw a ghost. Weird.

Oh shit, there's Pam Troy. I so do not want to talk to that bitch, or anyone else who's been spreading rumors for that matter.

"Isabel! Wait up!" she calls.

"Fuck off, bitch," I mutter.

I doubt she heard me because I said it quietly. Everything I saw is quiet now. Why? Maybe my constant yelling is what drove Liz over the edge.

"Iz! I told ya to wait," she says as she reaches Kyle and me.

"Go away, Pam. Just leave me alone," I hiss menacingly.

She narrows her eyes and stalks off.

"Good work, Izzy," Kyle tries to say lightly.

Keyword: tries.

Oh God, there's a Jeep. A black Jeep! I have to get out of here. I need to go home. No! Not home, that's where Max died. The, Liz died there. Can't go to Kyle's because Tess used to live there. Maria's place is out because she's turned it into a Max, Alex and Liz shrine. Very disturbing. I don't want to go to Michael's because it’s also full of stuff on the three of them. God, is there nowhere I can go?!

"Isabel. Are you okay?" Kyle asks.

That's when I realize that I'm crying again.

"Let's get out of here."

"Okay. Where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere but here." Pause. "San Antonio."

"San Antonio? Any particular reason why?"

"I just feel like I should go there. I don't know why," I mumble.

Kyle shrugs and we get into his Mustang and drive off. San Antonio, here I come.


Maria POV

"Sure, I'll tell Michael. Why are you going to San Antonio?" I ask in my slurred voice.

"Isabel says that she feels she has to go there. Whatever that's supposed to mean. How are you holding up?" Kyle asks.

I stare at the phone with slight amusement. How the hell can he ask me that?

"I'm doing okay." I am so lying.

"Good. Listen sweetie, I'll talk to you later. Don't forget to tell Michael."

"Okay, you two take care. We love you guys."

That wasn't a lie.

"We love you guys, too. Bye"

"Bye," I say and hang up the phone.

I turn back to the bottle of whiskey on Michael's counter.

"Now," I mutter, "where were we?"

This has to be the fifth bottle I've finished off in the past four days. I think its starting to piss off/worry Michael, but ya know what? I don't give a fuck. It makes me feel better and I can get my mind out of its state of utter despair.

I take another swig and look around the apartment. Wow, that knife on the counter is really shiny. I wonder what it felt like on Liz's skin. I wonder what it would feel like on mine. I walk into the kitchen and pick the blade up. If I cut myself, I realize, the pain would be gone and I could see Max, Liz and Alex again. That would leave Michael, though. I frown at this, but smile again when I realize that he would probably kill himself too. On that happy note, I pick up the knife and bring it to my wrist. This is when Michael decides to arrive. He sees me and immediately tears up.

"Maria, what are you doing?" he asks softly.

"Taking the pain away," I say like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

"What about me, Maria? I would die if you died. I'm not ready to die. Please, don't do this," he begs.

"Do you promise to make it better?"

"Yes, I swear. Just put the knife down."

He looks so scared and broken that I have no choice but to put it down. As soon as it’s out of my hands, Michael has me in a suffocating embrace.

"Don't ever do that to me again!" he whispers.

"I won't. Oh, Kyle and Isabel are gone." So its not the best time to mention it. Sue me.

He pulls away enough to look me in the eye.

"What do you mean 'gone'?"

Normally I think he'd be a bit more upset, but I think he's trying not to send me over the edge.

"They went to San Antonio."


"Iz felt compelled to go."

Michael is silent for moments and then says, "Fine. We're going too."

"We are? Whatever. I'll go pack."

My clothes are now at Michael's, much to my mother's dismay.

We load all of our stuff into the Jetta and Michael then pulls up in front of the Crashdown. I start to hyperventilate.

"What are we doing here?" I shriek.

"Calm down. I just need to get something. Wait here," Michael says.

He climbs up the fire escape and disappears over the side. I take this opportunity to dig through my bag.

"Hello Mr. Daniels!" I exclaim as I locate my favorite drink.

Jack Daniels is my friend.


Michael POV

Oh. My. God. Maria almost killed herself. I can't believe I was stupid enough to leave her alone all day. Jesus Christ! I know I would have followed suit if she had succeeded. Where would that have left Kyle and Isabel?

I calm down when I reach the balcony. Liz's balcony. I shudder as my eyes drift over her window. She died in there. Shaking my head, I return to my task. Where is her journal? I run my hand along the bricks until I find a loose one. I take the journal out and cradle it with my left arm as I climb back down to the street. Before I get into the car, lightning flashes and is followed by a loud crash of thunder. I look up at the ominous dark clouds. I feel this bad vibe and can't help but think 'something wicked this way comes.'


San Antonio, Tx

"Is that her?" a girl asks, pointing at the petite red head across the street.

The boy driving the Suburban smiles and nods.

"Yeah, that's her."

The other boy in the back seat leans forward.

"She's a babe. A complete hottie, really."

"Ow!" he exclaims as the driver hits him.

Their female companion laughs.

"Better watch yourself or you're gonna get your ass kicked!"

She turns back to the driver and notices his frown.

"What's wrong?"

"I'm just wondering what she and her friends are fighting about. They know about her, remember?"

"They're probably fighting over that little stunt that those two pulled today," says the other boy.

"What stunt?"

"Well, Jennifer told her boyfriend, Jon, Cindy told her boyfriend, Ian, and they both told Lisa and her boyfriend, Bill, about Alexis and the others. Considering how short her temper is and what she's capable of , they're lucky that Alexis didn't kill them!"

The driver snorts.

"That's for sure. She's dangerous when pissed."

"Look! She's leaving," the girl says.

"Whoa, she's really pissed. God help those humans," the driver mutters as he starts to follow her red Jeep.



"Lex, wait! You can't just walk away. We're all in this together," Jennifer Paxton calls to her so-called best friend.

I whirl around and narrow my green eyes at her.

"In this together?" I repeat incredulously. "I don't think so. You screwed me over so you can deal with this mess yourselves."

"Lex-" my other 'best friend' Cindy Essary starts to say.

I silence her with a glare.

"I don't want to hear it. From now on, stay the fuck away from Serena, Zac, Danny and me. Stay away or I will kill you. That's a promise."

That said, I turn around and hop into my red Jeep Wrangler. As I drive away I shoot them the finger and speed away from the high school.

"Bitches," I mutter under my breath.

I can't believe they had the nerve o tell their boyfriends, Lisa and Lisa's boyfriend about us. You just don't betray your friends like that. I mean, if they told me that they were vampires or something I wouldn't go around telling people. I guess that's what makes me an alien; I have a conscience.

At least Lisa, Jon, Ian and Bill didn't freak. I would hate to have to kill another person. Seriously, I'm not heartless. Killing Tess, Nicholas and Debbie was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I know it was to protect the Royal four and all, but it doesn't change the fact that I took the lives of three people. Oh well, I need to get used to it. The four of us will protect our siblings no matter what the cost. When I lost Zan and Lonnie last time, it nearly killed me. I know it devastated Danny to lose Ava, and Serena and Zac lost it when Rath died. Their deaths were what made us vulnerable to Khivar and we can't let that happen again.

Oh, wow. I've reached work. I get out of the car and walk into Clothestime, the store I work at.

"Alexis, you're late. Again," whines Lynn, my obnoxious coworker.

I swear, if I have to work with her all year, sophomore year will suck even more than it already does.

"Bite me, Lynn," I snap as I walk into the bathroom.

Great, I look like crap. My long auburn hair is frizzy, my dark green eyes are red and angry looking, and my pale, freckled skin is all splotchy. At least my clothes look good. I'm wearing my almost knee length black boots, black micromini leather skirt, white camisole, and black duster. Too cute.

I sigh, touch up my makeup, and make my way back to the counter.

Lynn glares at me.

"I don't see why you think you're so special. You're normal, just like everyone else who works here. You can't be late all the time."

I stifle a giggle and nod absently. Normal, ha! My name is Alexis Zana Johnson, I'm a sixteen year old sophomore at Alamo Heights High School, and I am anything but normal.

This is my December
This is my time of the year
This is my December
This is all so clear
This is my December
This is my snow covered home
This is my December
This is me alone
And I just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed
And I take back all the things I said to make you feel like that
And I just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed
And I take back all the things I said to you
And I’d give it all away
Just to have somewhere to go to
Give it all away
To have someone to come home to
This is my December
These are my snow covered dreams
This is me pretending
This is all I need


Thank God! Work is finally over. I was ready to kill Lynn. Obnoxious bitch. Now in a better mood, I skip merrily to my car. Yes, I skip. Got a problem with that? Didn’t think so. Anyway, my skipping is cut short when Jon Williams pulls up in front of me.

I glare. Didn’t I just tell his girlfriend that they were to stay away from me? Idiots.

“What do you want?” I ask with just a touch more hostility than normal.

“Lex, just come with me to Danny’s,” he says.

“Why?” I ask warily.

“Something’s happened.”

My blood goes cold.


“I’ll tell you when we get there. C’mon,” Jon pleads.

I narrow my eyes and grab his arm. I form a connection and break away as soon as I find what I’m looking for.

“No!” I scream, backing away from him.

Jon gets out of his BMW.

“Are you okay, Lex?”

I stare at him incredulously.

“Yeah, sure. I mean, Khivar killing my parents and Serena and Zac’s parents is just an everyday thing!” I shriek hysterically.

Jon sighs.

“I’m sorry. Zac wanted to break the news to you. Khivar also left this on your bed.”

I take the envelope and what I read turns my cold blood to ice.

Queen Alexisana,

Greetings from Earth! You really didn’t think I’d let you get away with killing my three best people, did you? You know, I think I’ll enjoy killing your family even more this time. Maybe you’ll get to watch, if you’re a good girl and don’t kill yourself like last time. Let the games begin, your majesty. This should be fun.


I close my eyes and stand there numbly for a moment. Then I run to my Jeep and floor it. Jon stands there in shock.

As I speed along the highway my thoughts are cluttered. I can’t think! I need to think! God, what am I going to do? Tears are running down my face and my vision is blurry so I pull off to the side. I collapse against the steering wheel with racking sobs. I can’t believe my parents are dead. It’s all my fault. If it weren’t for me, Khivar would never have killed them. Khivar. This is when my anger and hatred sets in. I sober up and speed toward Danny’s. So Khivar wants a fight, huh? He just scored himself a fucking war. Bring it on.

Michael POV

This trip is going to be the end of me. Do you have any idea what driving from Roswell, NM, to San Antonio, TX, with Maria DeLuca is like?! Its hell. Seriously, she’s had almost an entire bottle of whiskey and insists on listening to these really depressing songs. Wow, another one is starting.

Why does the sun go on shining?
Why does the sea rush to shore?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
If you don't love me anymore.
Why do the birds go on singing?
Why do the stars glow above?
Don't they know it's the end of the world?
It ended when I lost your love.
I wake up in the morning and I wonder.
Why everything is the same as it was.
And I can't understand,
No I can't understand Why life goes on the way it does.

Before the song is over, Maria starts to scream.

“Change the station! I can’t listen to the rest of that song!”


I change it to another station and what do ya know, another sad song is playing.

Come to me now
And lay your hands over me
Even if it's a lie
Say it will be alright
And I shall believe
I'm broken in two
And I know you're on to me
That I only come home
When I'm so all alone
But I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly you won't give up on me
And I shall believe
And I shall believe

“No, Jesus! Change it!” Maria shrieks.

“Okay, how’s this?”

“Much better.”

Don't call me, don't write, don't show up in the middle of the night
you know that we needed some time and space to breathe in

I still re-call the words you said to me
It's what you did not say that set me free
Now how can I find peace of mind
when you keep coming back again
It's not okay for you to play this game of see-saw with my head
Now it hurts too much, and it hits too hard
An I wont play this part

So now I say the things I want to say
Sometimes it's better letting go this way
I'll always know, down in my soul
We really had so far to go
I've given all I had to give and now
it's time for me to live, and I won't look back
and I won't regret, though it hurts like hell,
Someday I will forget

It's funny how we seem to re-appear
I never thought I'd see this soul disappear

And this is letting go, this is letting go, and this is letting go, this is letting go

Don't call me, Don't write, Don't show up in the middle of the night
you know that we needed some time and space to breathe

Don't call me, Don't write, don't show up in the middle of the night
to say that you've been thinking, coz I know it's just the drink in you

As the song ends, I turn to stare at my girlfriend.

“How is that better? It’s just as depressing as the last two.”

“Those two reminded me of Liz, that’s why,” she states simply.


I know there’s more to it, but I know I shouldn’t push. It would just upset Maria and Lord knows what she’ll do when she’s upset. I sigh and look at the clock. Great, five more hours until we reach San Antonio. Why do I have a really bad feeling about this?

Earth year: 1946 Antar year: 2020 Location: Zane, Antar (capital)
6 months after the deaths of the Royal Four

Queen Alexisana runs down a long corridor. She stops and looks over her shoulder. Seeing no one she waves her hand over a panel and a door opens up. She steps through the door and closes it.

Zacariahs, Serena, Daniel and Via all stand to greet her. Zacariahs immediately takes his place beside Alexisana. Via studies her daughter and queen.

“Are you okay?” she asks.

Alexisana shakes her head and draws a breath.

“Khivar is in the palace. He found out about our plans for Zan and the others. I need to send them to Earth, now.”

Zacariahs shook his head.

“No way. You still don’t have all of your strength back from that fight you had with Latessa last week. There’s no way you’ll have enough power to send them without totally draining yourself,” he says, his eyes full of concern.

Alexisana manages a weak smile.

“I know, but it’s our only shot. I’ll just need all of you to take care of everything after I send them. It will take a lot out of me, but I’ll be fine.”

“Zanar and Vilandra would have been proud of their little sister. You’re an excellent Queen, Lex,” says Via, her voice full of emotion.

“Thank you, Mother.”

Alexisana turns to her friends who have yet to speak.

“Daniel, Serena? Are you two okay?”

The young husband and wife smile weakly.

“Yeah. Its just that today Ava would have turned 23,” Daniel says softly.

“I know. I turn 16 tomorrow, remember?” Alexisana replies.

Serena snorts.

“What a time to be celebrating a birthday,” she mumbles.

Alexisana sighs and turns to the portrait on the way.

Pictured left to right are the Royal Eight: Prince Daniel and his sister, Queen Drava; King Zanar and his sisters, Princess Vilandra and Princess Alexisana; and Prince Zacariahs and his siblings, Prince Arthur and Princess Serena.

Arthur. Alexisana chuckles a bit. He always hated that name, but no one knew how he had come up with Rath. He always an oddball.

Touching the picture, Alexisana murmurs, “Someday, we’ll all be together again.”


“Where the hell are they?” I wonder out loud.

Jon went to get Lex 45 minutes ago. They should have been back by now! I continue to pace the floor and attempt to connect with Lex again. Finally! I have some success. As soon as I’m in, I’m hit with a wall of burning rage.

“Uh-oh. Lex knows.”

“What?” Danny asks absently.

“Lex knows about what Khivar did and she’s way beyond pissed,” I groan.

“Naw, really? I thought she’d be fucking high as a kite,” Serena mutters.

“Look, smartass, you are not helping. I know this is hard on you, but it’s hard on all of us too. Jesus, you act more like Rath everyday.”

My sister’s stormy gray eyes grow violent.

“What did you say?” she hisses, twirling her dark hair tight around her finger. She always does that when she’s mad.

“You heard me.”

“Don’t you ever compare me to Rath. We’re nothing alike. I mean, he abandoned us, Zacariahs.”

Now my gray eyes grow stormy.
“No he didn’t! How dare you say that. He gave up his life to save Lex last time. How is that abandoning us?”

“Because he didn’t love us enough to live. He loved Alexisana more than us. He always did.”

What the hell is her problem?

“That’s bullshit and you fucking know it!” I growl.

This is when Lex decides to grace us with her presence. I look at her and see how destroyed she is. She looks exactly like she did after she found Zan and Lonnie’s bodies in our other lives. Oh God, she’s gonna go after Khivar. All hell is going to break loose now, I just know it.


As Zac stands there staring at me, I take time to study his appearance. His beautiful gray eyes are cloudy and don’t have their usual spark, his face is pale, and his chocolate hair is all messed up. He looks like a lost child, just like when Rath died. He opens his arms and I don’t hesitate to fly into them.

“Zac, what are we going to do?” I cry into his shoulder.

He rocks me gently and whispers, “I don’t know yet. We’ll think of something.”

Before I can respond, I feel something. Could it be? I look up and lock eyes with Danny. He nods slowly and I know I’m right. Almost as one, Danny and I run to the door and fling it open.

I look at the three people in front of me and smile.

“You’re here,” I whisper.

Things are looking up, but I’m still going to kill Khivar, believe me.


Bet you thought I was dead, didn’t you? Surprise! I’ll let Liz explain it to you later. Right now all of my focus is on my little sister, Alexis.

“You’re here,” she murmurs with a huge grin on her face.

I smile and nod.

“Did you think I wouldn’t come?”

She shrugs and launches herself into my arms. I hold her tight and stroke her hair.

“Its okay. I’m here now,” I whisper.

“Ava?” I hear the dark haired boy with deep brown eyes say.

Ah, he must be Daniel. I look up at Liz as she nods. She pulls Daniel into a tight embrace and starts to cry along with him.

“Oh my God, I thought I’d never see you again!” he cries into her hair.

Liz just holds him. Alexis pulls away far enough to be able to see the two of them.

“Its good to see you again, Ava,” she says to Liz.

“Its Liz now, Alexis.”

“Oh. Well, I go by Lex now.”

“Lex. I love it. What do the rest of you go by?” I ask.

“I go by Danny, Zacariahs is Zac, and Serena is still Serena.”

“What about you, Zan?” Lex asks.


Lex nods and looks at Alex.

“And you are…?”

“Alex Whitman. I’m their keeper.”

“Nice to meet you. I guess I should introduce the others. The twins are Zac and Serena; this is Jennifer Paxton,” she says pointing at a tan 5’11 blue eyes, sandy haired girl. “This is Cindy Essary.” Cindy is a 5’5 dark blonde with light brown eyes. “This is Lisa Mumberg.” Lisa is about 5’9 with dark brown eyes and light blonde hair. “This is Jon Williams, Ian Smith and Bill Rodgers.” I’m not good at describing guys, but they’re all tall.

“Thanks, but we already knew who everyone was,” says Alex.

“How?” Zac asks, speaking for the first time.

Before I can answer, Lex snorts.

“You followed me, didn’t you?”

I smile. I never could hide anything from her.

“Yeah, over the past two days,” Liz replies.

Lex turns to her friends and smirks.

“And you guys said I was being paranoid! This teaches you to listen to me from now on.”

I laugh and shake my head. Lex hasn’t changed a bit.

Flashback- Liz POV

“Oh my God, I can’t do this!” I cry to myself as I walk out of Michael’s apartment.

Poor Max, I just hope he doesn’t do anything drastic when he finds out. I just have to let the others see him react naturally to my “death”, and then I can tell him. He’s going to loose it. I walk into my room and find Maria, my future daughter, waiting for me.

“Its about time,” she mutters.

I blink and stare at her for a moment. Finally, I find my voice.

“Excuse me? ‘Its about time’? What the hell is that? I was with my family for what was probably the last time and you expect me to rush? I’m preparing to fake my own suicide for Christ’s sake! Cut me some slack, little girl!” I shriek.

Whoa. Where did that come from?
My sixteen-year-old daughter just stares at me.

“Wow, you never change, do you?” she whispers.

“I guess I don’t,” I reply. “Let’s get this over with.”

We wait until I can feel Max approaching. Maria goes into the bathroom and I begin my mind warp. Max walks in, followed by Michael, Maria, Isabel and Kyle. Max takes one look at my “body” and starts to scream. He runs over to me and tries to heal me. Michael and Isabel rush up to help him, but its no use. By this time Max and everyone else is hysterical with tears, but Max above all. I watch as Michael calls the police and takes Maria and Max outside. I watch as Max fights Michael to stay by my side, screaming that it’s his fault. I continue to watch as my parents crumble and Valenti falls apart. I watch them take my “body” out of my room in a body bag. When everyone has finally left my room, I stop the mind warp and fall to the floor, totally drained. Maria peeks her head out of the bathroom.

“Mom? Are you okay?” she asks.

I look at her and shake my head.

“God, did you see them? They all looked so broken.”

“It’ll be okay, Liz,” Alex whispers from behind me.

“Don’t do that!” I hiss as I whack him upside the head. “You nearly gave me a heart attack!”

“Sorry. We better get over to Max’s before he does something stupid.”

“Yeah-“I start to say, but am cut off by Maria’s whimper.

I turn around just in time to see her disappear. Fresh tears spring to my eyes.

“I guess it worked,” I whisper.

Alex just nods and leads me out of the room through the balcony. I only hope it wasn’t all in vain.

Maria POV

Finally, we’ve reached San Antonio! I thought the drive was going to kill me.

“Where are Iz and Kyle staying?” Michael asks.

I shrug.

“You don’t know?”

I nod.

“Great. Well, can you call them and find out, ye of little words?”

I nod again and reach for my phone. Whoa, I’m dizzy. I think I’ll take a nap.

Michael POV

Great, Maria just passed out. If it were possible, I’d kill Liz and Max again for doing this to Maria, not to mention the rest of us. I sigh and reach for Maria’s phone.


“Hey Kyle, Its Michael. Where are y’all staying?”

Kyle snorts.

“I figured you’d follow us. We’re staying at the Hyatt on the Riverwalk.”

“Okay, I drove past it earlier. See you soon.”


I wonder how much this is going to cost me. As I sit in traffic in front of the Hard Rock Café, I feel something familiar. I look up and see a gorgeous redhead standing with a tall dark haired boy with gray eyes and a girl with the same coloring. Must be his sister. I continue to stare at them until the irritated driver behind me begins to honk. I shake off the feeling of déjà vu and drive off. That’s when I’m hit with a flash.


“Alexisana, please! Just go hide!” I scream.

The regal beauty with sparkling green eyes shakes her head and grabs onto my arm.

“No, I won’t leave you. This is my battle, not yours,” she says fiercely.

I look to my younger brother.

“Zacariahs, take Alexisana to a safe place, now!” I command.

“No, don’t do this! Please, Rath,” she pleads as my brother picks her up and carries her away.

“I love you, Alexisana. I always have,” I call after her.

“Rath! Rath, I love you!” she screams as she disappears into the transporter. I wipe the tears from my eyes and turn back to the battle before me.

“Well, this was a great idea,” I mutter to myself.


What the fuck was that?! I’ve never had memory flashes like that before and why do I get the feeling that the boy and redhead I just saw have something to do with it?


“Wow, is the line always this long?” I ask as Max, Alex, Danny and I join our fellow Antarians.

Danny grins. It feels good to see him smile again.

“Yeah, the place is pretty popular.”

“I don’t see why, the food sucks,” Serena says.

God, she sounds so much like Michael. I do believe she’s managed to become even more bitter and cynical this time around.

“Give it a rest, sis,” Zac says.

Serena rolls her eyes and I laugh. It feels like old times.

After we’re finally seated, Lex asks, “Why are you guys here? How did you know to come?”

Max and Alex look at me and Max squeezes my hand. I sigh and begin my tale.

**Flashback- 1 day before Liz’s “death”**

“Bye Max!” I call as he climbs down the ladder.

I shake my head and turn to go back into my room. Max is never going to give up trying to makeup for what happened with Tess. If only I was sure that I could forgive him. A bright flash of light sends me running into my room. God, not again. I look around my room and see a tall, tan, dark haired teenage girl dressed in combat boots, ripped leather pants, a shredded and bloody white tank top and a beat up leather jacket. What I notice the most, though, are her eyes…they’re Max’s eyes.

“Who are you?” I stammer.

She stares back at me with wild, wide eyes.

“Mom,” she whispers.

I don’t think I heard her correctly.


“Mom,” she repeats, coming out of her shocked state.

“Who are you?” I ask more forcibly.

She blinks a few times and sits on the edge of my bed.

“My name’s Maria Evans. I’m your daughter.”

Somehow that didn’t surprise me.

“Okay, why are you here?”

“I took the Granilith and came to change the future.”

“Yeah, I got that. How? Tess took the Granilith a few months ago.”

Maria grinned wryly.

“No, she didn’t. She just mind warped y’all into thinking she did.”

“Oh. So what happened for you to come back?”

I’m on autopilot now.

“The end of the world, only seventeen years from now instead of fourteen. Mom, there’s some things you need to know and I think you should sit down to hear them.”

I sit and look at her intently.

“Okay, you know how Dad and the others need Ava?”

I cringe and nod.

“Well, Tess isn’t Ava—you are. No, don’t interrupt me. You’re Ava and Tess’ real name is Latessa. She’s a Skin from your past. She’s also not pregnant, at least not with Dad’s kid. Your brother, Daniel, mind warped Dad and Tess into thinking that they slept together. Tess actually slept with some ass named Sean and Dad was unconscious. Wait, there’s more and it’s a big one. Alex is alive.”

I have no words. I stare at Maria in shock while she waits for me to react.


Maria grins.

“Let’s just say that the younger half of the Royal Eight have been busy.”

“Royal Eight?”

“That’s right, you haven’t met them yet. Well, there are actually eight royals: you, your brother, Daniel, Dad, Isabel, their sister, Alexisana, Michael, and his siblings, Zacariahs and Serena.”

I can’t help but smile.

“I have a brother?”


“How did they save Alex?”

“I’ll let Alex explain that to you and Dad after our work is done.”

“Right, changing the future. What do we need to do?”

“Make everyone, even Dad, think that you’re dead,” she replies looking at her boots.

I blink in surprise.


“So they’ll buy it when Dad kills himself.”

“What?!” I shriek.

“I know it sounds completely crazy, but let me tell you a little story…”


“Two days ago in my time, you and Dad were killed. Four days ago, Michael, Isabel, Lex and Zac died. Alex, Serena, Danny and Kyle were assassinated three weeks before that, but our most devastating loss took place sixteen years ago right before I was born.”

She stops for a moment and seems to be fighting the tears that are threatening to flow. Finally, she sighs and continues with her story.

“A week before I was born, Jim and Maria were publicly executed on every TV station on the planet by Nicholas.”

I burst into tears as she goes on.

“You, Dad, Lex and Zac were in New York having peace talks with Khivar, Kathana, Larek, Sero and Hanar; Michael was with Isabel and Serena shopping for an engagement ring for Maria; Kyle, Danny and Alex were in San Antonio at a Spurs vs. Lakers game; and Jim and Maria were in Roswell planning for Jim and Amy’s wedding. Nicholas snatched the two of them and the Skins took over the airwaves. He, um, he hung them in the middle of the Crashdown and broadcasted it live on television. All ten of you happened to be watching TV at the time and you saw it. Afterwards, you all became heartless and merciless toward everyone except each other. Amy was devastated and killed herself because she had nothing left. You see, over the course of this coming week, Khivar killed Sean, your parents, Max and Isabel’s parents, Lex’s parents, and Zac and Serena’s parents. Anyways, “she says, desperate to escape that subject, “as important as everyone else is, you and Dad are vital to our survival. Only the two of you and your descendants can control the Granilith, unless you perform a ceremony that hands it over to another bloodline. That’s why we have to fake your deaths—we have to make Khivar loose all hope at controlling the Granilith.”

I wipe away my tears and shake my head in confusion.

“How does that work? What would happen if we really died and didn’t have an heir? Who would get the power?”

“No one. The Granilith would basically die with you. If he thinks that you’re dead and knows that you have no heir—“

“He’ll give up on the Granilith,” I finish for her.

“Exactly, which is really good for our team.”

“If I do this, will my parents still die?”

Maria frowns.

“I don’t think so since they won’t really be leverage, but the Sean, the Evanses, the Johnsons and the Sykes might since Iz and the others will still be alive.”

“Well, maybe we can stop that.”

“So, you in?”

“Yeah, let’s do it.”

**End flashback**

“I’m sorry we weren’t able to help your parents.”

The other teens nod.

“Anyway, Maria went on to help me with my powers and our plan for faking my and Max’s deaths. After we pulled my ‘death’ off successfully, she disappeared and it was time to tell Max. That’s when things got interesting.”


I smile and continue the story where Liz left off.

**Max’s Flashback**

I lie on my bed drowning in my tears. Liz is dead. My only reason for living is dead. What am I supposed to do now? Did she really expect me to go on with my life without her? I know; I’ll join her, just like Romeo and Juliet. Now we’re really star-crossed lovers. I sit up and wipe my soaked face with my shirt. Now, what’s the best way to go about this? I begin my search, but am interrupted by a knock at my window. I turn around and stop dead in my tracks at the sight before me.

Liz and Alex.

A wet Liz and Alex.

A worried Liz and Alex.

An alive Liz and Alex.

Holy shit, I’m seeing things.

All of a sudden the window opens and Liz and Alex step out of the rain.

“Thanks for letting us in, man,” Alex mutters.

Liz hits him and hisses, “He thinks he’s seeing things, retard.”


I stare at them in utter shock.

“Are you real?” I squeak out.

Liz smiles and nods her head. I don’t hesitate; I know it’s the truth. I begin crying all over again and hold her so tight I’m afraid I might crush her, but I don’t care at this point.

“Shh, its okay. I’m okay, Max. I’m never going to leave you,” she whispers as she rubs my back.

“How? Why?” I ask without loosening my hold on her.

She sighs against my chest.

“I had another visitor from the future.”

I freeze. Oh no, I did not cause myself this much pain.

“Who?” I ask, terrified that it was me again.

“Our future daughter,” she whispers.

I pull away and look at her in wonder.


“She came to prevent our deaths in the future…”

**End flashback**

“Liz filled me in on the story and we faked my death the same way she did hers.”

“Wow,” was all Lex could say while the others sat in stunned silence.

After a moment or two, Zac finally speaks.

“Dude, your lives suck,” he mutters.

Liz, Alex and I laugh genuinely for the first time in a while.

“At least we have each other,” I say in a cheesy voice.

The others laugh again and Liz mutters, “So cornball.”

If only the others were here, then life would be perfect. Sucky, but perfect enough for me.

Michael POV

I just woke from the strangest dream. IT was really disturbing…


“Alexisana, don’t make me come in there!” I yell at a massive door.

A short girl with bright green eyes and dark red hair pokes her head out.

“Go away!” she says crossly.

I sigh.

“Alexis, its not my fault—“

“Not your fault? Are you telling me that you don’t have a choice in marrying my sister?” she asks incredulously.

“It was arranged!” I plead.

“So un-arrange it,” she says icily as she slams the door in my face.

“Rath? What’s going on?” a dark haired girl with crystal gray eyes asks.

“God, Serena, Alexis is so mad at me. You know I don’t want to marry Lonnie, but I have no choice.”

Serena frowns.

“Do you love Alexis?”

I nod.

“Have you told her?”

“No,” I admit sullenly.

“Well, that’s your problem. Alexis needs to know that you love her. Stop being a stonewall.”

“Look who’s talking.”

Serena rolls her eyes.

“I may be like that with everyone else, but at least I let Danny see me. Let Alexis be your Danny.”

“Real deep, sis.”

“Oh, bite me!” she mutters as she walks down the hall.

I step toward the princess’ room, but Zan’s booming voice stops me in my tracks.

“Rath! Ava! In the command room, now!”

A dark haired girl, who looks startlingly like Liz, and I run into a grand room filled with complex computers and a large table. A man I can only guess is Zan paces the length of the room.

“What’s wrong?” Ava asks with worry in her voice.

Zan turns to us and I’m surprised to see unshed tears in his eyes.

“Lonnie,” he chokes out.

“What? What’s wrong with her?” I ask.

“She has betrayed us,” Zan whispers.

“What?” Ava gasps.

“She’s been sleeping with Khivar and told him of our counter attack plans.”

“No,” Ava whispers. “How could she do this to us?”

“Its not her fault,” a quiet voice says from the doorway.

I turn to look at my brother-in-law.

“What do you mean, Daniel?” his sister demands.

“That bitch, Latessa, has been mind warping her. Lonnie has no idea what she’s doing.”

“How do you know?” Zan asks with a glint of hope in his amber eyes.

“She’s been doing it to me, too. I did some memory recovery today to figure something out for class when I discovered hidden memories. I overheard her and Khivar’s plans for all of us so she mind warped me.”

“Those Skin bastards will pay dearly for this,” Zan seethes with hatred in his eyes.

I believe him.


Isn’t that fucked up? I have no idea what to make of it. And damnit, who the hell is Alexisana? I don’t understand what’s happening to me, but like always, I will find out.


Oh God, it’s starting. I can feel their presences—Michael and Isabel are in San Antonio. What am I going to do? I love Zac so much, but Alexisana and Rath were soul mates, which makes Michael and me soul mates. What do I do if I can’t control my feelings for him? Liz says that he’s in love with this human named Maria and I don’t want to mess that up.

“Lex?” Max’s soft voice brings me back to Earth.

“What’s up?” I ask.

He sits on the edge of my bed and looks a little uncomfortable.

“You know how the four of you, plus Liz and I, have fully recovered our memories of the past?”

I nod. Where is he going with this?

“Well, um, uh—damn this is hard. Wh-what’s going to happen when you see Michael again?”

Talk about cutting to the chase, that’s blunt.

“I don’t know,” I sigh.

Max nods.

“I just want you to know that I’ll support whatever happens between the two of you. I know what its like to have a soul mate.”

I burst into tears. How do you like my random displays of emotion?

“I’m just so confused! I love Zac, but a part of me will always love Rath and I know that those feelings will multiply when we’re reunited. What about Maria and Zac? I would hate to do anything that would hurt them.”

Max smiled.

“That’s my Alexisana. You may have always tried to be a stonewall, but you care deeply about everyone. I mean, you haven’t even met Maria and you’re worried about her feelings.”

I sigh.

“Maybe I care too much.”

“No you don’t. Look, just follow your heart. A very wise person once told me that and it works.”

“I guess. I think I’m going to try and get some sleep now.”

Max nods and kisses my forehead.

“Goodnight, princess.”

“G’night Zan,” I murmur and fall asleep.

I have this feeling that I’ll need all my strength the next day.



[ edited 3 time(s), last at 11-Dec-2001 6:23:33 PM ]
posted on 14-Oct-2001 12:26:42 PM
All my stories WILL be updated today. Undertow will be first and then I'll write more for the others. Sorry for the long wait.
posted on 21-Oct-2001 3:11:59 PM
I'm still having some difficulty posting/editing, but don't worry...I'm making my own site to post all of my stuff and anyone else's if they ask me. It should be up soon and all of my stories will be updated.
posted on 24-Oct-2001 5:30:47 PM
My own site with updated versions of each story will be up by tomorrow. Please email me at xanbehr4getdestiny⊕ if you wish to have your stories posted there. In the meanwhile, enjoy part 9 (this is the only story I have time to post for, sorry)


Men are retards. Seriously, they are. And Michael Guerin is the biggest one of them all. Why? I don’t know—he just is. Let me tell you what that idiot did to me today…

“Alexis? Are you awake?” a woman’s voice asked.

I slowly opened my eyes, only to see Senora Salinas and my entire Pre-AP Spanish 2 class staring at me.

“I am now,” I mumbled and sat up.

“Lex? You okay?” Jen whispered.

I just ignored her. What? I just didn’t want to deal with her, okay? Anyway, the bell rang shortly after that and I met Zac, Serena, and Danny at my Jeep.

“Where are we going?” Zac asked.

I shrugged. I really didn’t have a destination; I was just driving. We eventually ended up at EZ’s. That’s when I felt him.

“Oh my God,” Serena hissed.

I knew then that the others felt it—Michael and Isabel were inside. We rushed inside and our eyes were immediately drawn to the back corner booth. Michael and Isabel looked up and I went into some sort of trance. I couldn’t help it! I mean—the guy is gorgeous! Moving on…the next thing I know, Michael is storming over, demanding to know who we are. Automatically, I put up an invisible shield around Zac, Serena, and Danny. Invisible, at least, to humans. Michael and Isabel, however, saw it and completely freaked.

“What the hell?” Isabel murmured.

Michael grabbed my arm and began to drag be outside.

“Lex!” Zac screamed.

I turned and gave him a tight smile and then followed my arrogant soul mate outside.

“You’re coming with us to our hotel and we’re going to have a little talk. Behave and you’ll be okay,” Michael growled into my ear.

I just nodded and climbed into the back of the Jetta.

Michael POV

Okay, I have to interrupt now. Lex is making me sound all crazy and angry and stuff. That girl is such a pill. I think she’s a witch. Let me tell you what she did next…

“So, who are you?” I asked calmly once we reached the room.

Yes, calmly. I think I did a pretty good job of controlling myself.

“Name’s Alexis Johnson, but you can call me Lex,” the redhead replied.

Alexis? Lex? Alexisana? I was starting to feel a connection.

“Are you an alien?” Maria blurted out.

I still cannot believe she did that. Lex just raised an eyebrow.

“As a matter of fact, I am. My formal name would be Alexisana.”

Holy fuck.

“You know who we are, don’t you?” Isabel asked.

Lex nodded. “You’re Vilandra, aka Isabel Evans; Michael used to be Arthur, er, Rath; and I’m guessing the two humans are Kyle and Maria.”

“Who are you?” I asked again.

“I am, or rather, was Queen Alexisana of Antar, sister to the fallen King Zanar and Princess Vilandra.”

“M-my sister?” Isabel stammered.


“Who were the others you were with at the restaurant?” Kyle asked.

“The twins are Zac and Serena, Michael’s siblings; and the other boy is Danny, Liz’s brother.”

“Liz? What the hell does Liz have to do with this?” I demanded.

“Yeah, and since when does she have a brother?” Maria added.

Lex looked at us with an amused expression on her face.
“Liz is the real Ava—Tess was a Skin who tried to kill Liz and take her place, but it didn’t work. Claudia Parker stumbled upon Liz back in 1983, after Tess dumped her in the middle of the desert looking like a baby, and gave Liz to her son and daughter-in-law to raise as their own. So, Tess wasn’t destined to be with Max—Liz is.”

We all had tears in our eyes at the mention of Max and Liz.

“Um, Lex? I hate to be the one to break it to you, but Max and Liz…Max and Liz are dead,” I choked out.

“No, they’re not,” she whispered almost inaudibly.

The others didn’t hear her, but I did.

“We’ll be right back,” I mumbled and pulled Lex into my adjoining room. “What did you mean by that?”

“Mean by what?” she asked with wide eyes.

“About Liz and Max not being dead.”

The small girl just stared at her feet.

“They’re not, and neither is Alex Whitman.”

‘They’re alive? Oh, thank God,’ was all I could think. I’m pretty sure that this was the precise moment I realized I believed in God. I looked back over at Lex and caught her staring at me.

“What?” I asked self-consciously.

She jumped, startled.

“Um…nothing. You just haven’t changed a bit, that’s all.”

“What aren’t you saying?”

She blushed and looked in every direction but mine.

“Well, it’s just--you and I were together as Alexisana and Rath and I remember how much I loved you. We were so happy…but, we’re different people now. Plus, you’re with Maria and I’m with Zac. Nothing can ever happen between us.”

“You’re with my little brother?!” For some reason that made me really jealous.

Lex nodded. I think this is when the little witch cast a spell on me because the next thing I know…


He kissed me! What the hell? But I didn’t fight. I know I should have, but I didn’t. We pulled apart and he uttered the words I never thought I’d hear: “I remember you.”

This brings us to our current situation. Michael and I are now making out, ignoring the LOUD voices in our heads that are screaming about how bad of an idea this is. Any minute now, Maria or one of the others is going to catch us and that’s the last thing we need.

“Um…Michael, God, Michael…shouldn’t we, uh, stop?” I manage to say with great difficulty.

He pulls away and stares at me for a moment.

“I guess you’re right. But, Lex? I saw flashes when we kissed.”

I gulp.

“Which ones?”

He touches my arm and we instantly connect.

**Zac, Danny, Serena, and me breaking out of our pods in Kerrville**

**Richard and Eliza Johnson finding me in the middle of the valley, searching for the other three**

**Me using my powers for the first time to blow up my third grade teacher’s desk**

**Watching Michael, Max, Liz, and Isabel over the years from a distance**

**Kissing Zac for the first time**

**Saving Alex from Latessa, yet not knowing who exactly Alex is**

**Finding out my parents were dead**

**Max, Liz and Alex showing up at my door**

**Talking to Max about Michael**

“You’ve been watching out for us all along and we never knew it.”

“Yeah, well, we all swore that we’d do anything to prevent the past from repeating. It nearly killed us when you died last time and Khivar used your deaths to eventually kill the four of us.”

Michael sighs.

“I guess we need to get back to the others and you have to take us to Max, Liz and Alex.”

“Great,” I mumble, “Max is going to be thrilled.”

We casually walk back into the common room, but Isabel and Maria barely notice. Kyle, however, gives me an ‘I-know-what-you-two-were-doing’ look. I don’t like him already. He’s too…too guyish. Yes, I know he’s a guy, but he’s way too…MACHO! That’s the word. He’s way too freakin’ macho for my taste.

“Can I use the phone to call my friends? They’re probably freaking out right now.”

Isabel hands me her phone and I call my house.

“Hello?” Max screams into the phone.

“Hey Max.”

“Lex! Where are you? Why are you blocking me? Wh—“

“Max! Chill out. I’m with Michael, Isabel, Kyle and Maria. I’m fine.”

“Shit! Do they know?”

“Michael does.”

“Great.” I can practically feel Max rolling his eyes.

“Look, I’ll see you guys soon. Bye.”


I hang up and look around at the confused and slightly annoyed people in the room.

“I know I’m not drunk, so I didn’t imagine that phone call. That said, who the hell is Max?” Maria demands.

Michael and I look at each other and grimace. This is not going to be pretty.


[ edited 1 time(s), last at 24-Oct-2001 5:33:57 PM ]
posted on 24-Oct-2001 8:16:31 PM
lol. okay...cut off time for submitting me stories is midnight tonight. I will post others, but those who have them to me tonight will have their stories up first. Once I have everything set up, I'll post the link. Thanx.*bounce*
posted on 25-Oct-2001 11:16:31 PM
My site is up! My site is up!*bounce*
posted on 11-Dec-2001 6:22:44 PM
I know that this story and all of my others SERIOUSLY need to be updated. SOrry, but my life has been a living hell. I keep getting emails begging me to write some more, and all I have to say is this: Christmas vacation starts in 10 days. I promise that when I return, it will be with a bang. Thanx for reading.